I was born in the 1950s, when the "cure" for transsexuals was electroshock, aversion therapy including shocking the genitalia and poisoning, and if that failed, a lobotomy. So no, had doctors at time officially diagnosed me as transsexual I probably would have ended up a vegetable in some institution somewhere.
I DO wish that I had been able to get the kind of counseling and support they offer today. Now there are even some tests that might have resulted in diagnosis at birth, or at least an awareness before it became an issue.
Good counselors and trained educators would have encouraged me to transition as early as I really wanted to (5 years old) and they would have started me on testosterone blockers (Spiro?) before I started puberty.
As a result I would have had to endure fewer beatings in Elementary school and Jr High, and might have not gotten as self destructive (Drugs, Booze, Suicides, high risk behaviors), or at least would have been able to talk to the therapists about the REAL issues rather than the symptoms.
Thank goodness for AA and NA, because my sponsors were able to help me discuss and address my transsexuality without as much judgement and without the threat of losing their licenses if they didn't turn me over for "De-Programming" immediately.
I DID see counselors in Elementary, Jr High, High School, and in 1977 took a year out of college and did out-patient therapy 6 days a week for 6 hours a day, but they REFUSED to even allow me to discuss being transsexual, even after a nearly effective suicide attempt.
I continued to see other therapists who refused to discuss it and / or discouraged my doing anything about it.
When I finally did encounter a therapist who understood anything about transsexuality, he realized that I was type six, and would either transition or self-destruct one way or the other. It was almost spooky how true it was.
When I started seeing a counselor for transition, i started RLE and he gave me assignments which helped me feel more and more comfortable being myself. There was more happiness, vitality, joy, and also focus and desire to relate to people.
Before coming out, most people knew there was something "phony" about me, and a few even thought I might be a "Ted Bundy" type. I could socialize, but doing so as a man was usually very awkward. Women liked me, as friends, but couldn't figure out why I wasn't trying to have sex with them. Even my sexual partners realize I was a bit "different" and each eventually figured out that I was a lesbian. Often, the discovery resulted in the end of the relationships, sending me into another suicidal tail-spin.
After coming out, it became completely obvious to everyone who knew me that I really WAS DEBBIE. I really was a girl trapped in a boy's body, trying to make my body match my mind. My mother, sister, and brother reacted with "It all makes sense now!". My sister said "I always thought of you as the older sister I never had". I could brush out her hear without it hurting, taught her to do make-up, taught her dance exercises to help her appear more feminine, and so on. Mom had known all along, but realized how much it actually was true, I was a girl inside. My father realized it was true, but struggled with it. I think he was mostly afraid that I would destroy any chance of a career, a happy marriage, or a happy life. He was transgendered as well, preferring to watch "chick flicks", go to symphonies, ballet, and really having no like of sports at all. He just didn't understand why I had to "come out" after spending most of his life in the closet.
For dad, the turning point was when he friended me on facebook. He began to see that if I wanted to "Be myself" that meant being Debbie. Just before he died, i went to be with him, and the first thing he said when we had a chance to talk was "If I can give you nothing else, I want you to be yourself - Even if that's Debbie". For the rest of the time I was with him, I was Debbie, I was myself, and I was taking care of him, and he LOVED the real me! At one point, just before the end, he even thought I was my mother, because we looked so much alike.
I'm now living full time as female. At work I'm "Rexxie", because I haven't done the legal name change yet. Everywhere else, I'm "Debbie" because that's who I am.
The therapist I'm seeing now is helping me through transition. She doesn't even think of me in terms of Rex anymore.
