could you be satisfied just being androgynous rather than ful time dress and all

[Jess42]

I just really don't know anymore. I used to be but that is kind of fading. Besides I have bigger boobs than Milla does so that is a plus. I really wouldn't say she is androgynous though. She was a supermodel after all. Who knows how big they would get on HRT? I hope not too much. Rough roads make me sore enough now if I don't wear a bra for support.

[Rose City Rose]

I tried going andro and what I discovered was I got called "sir" about 99 times out of 100, because my body type tended to edge me closer to the perception of being male.

It was only when I edged over the line into fem territory, by wearing 100% female clothing and accessories and adjusting my hair just so, that I found I was more comfortable and got gendered correctly 99 times out of 100.

I think going andro is fine for someone who's just dipping their toes in the water or still feels a little bit male, but I discovered quickly that this was not me.

[justpat]

 Simply put NEVER. I don't really pass and never will and don't care ,people treat me with respect and courtesy that is all I ask.I have been full time since July of 2013 and did not start hrt till Dec 2013 that took a lot of courage but I had no choice it amounted to come out or perish.

[helen2010]

That's definitely something I've considered in order to address the minor "dischord" I have.  I'd rather be an androgynous male who could look very feminine than be a full-time feminine female.

Different folks, different strokes I guess.

KB

Ditto. This is where I am.  But life is a journey and plenty of NB folk have transitioned MTF and then chosen to present as  A.  So anything is possible in the long run.  Time will tell.

Safe travels

Aisla

[LizMarie]

For me, no, that's not enough. I have to wear wigs due to hair loss and without a wig, I'm rather obviously male. But with a wig and just a big of light foundation, I'm good to go 98% of the time.

I am continuing onward, will get my legal paperwork done soon, then begin counting the days until I can do GCS. For me, that's where I need to go. For others, the answer may certainly be different. Only you can determine when you've reached a point where you are happy.

[Foxglove]

I briefly (for about three seconds) considered the option of going androgynous, but knew it wasn't for me.  I always wanted to be a girl all the way.  I'm a bit of a girly girl, and that's what makes me happy.

[Leila]

I am currently living in a state of limbo or androgyny mostly out of circumstance rather than choice. I have to say I don't particularly like it, even though I see this as a transitory state for me. I want to be seen as a woman, the woman I always felt I am within. I don't want to be thought of as being androgynous forever to have funny looks or quizzical stares just because the general public isn't sure of the gender I am presenting. To never know if shop assistants should let me go to the mens or ladies changing areas in shops when I want to try on a garment for size. To not be sure if I should chose the men's or ladies' toilet. For the general public to look at me strangely when they see my chest but work out my assigned gender from other traits.

HRT is helping to change my body and looks. Put some make up on, do up my hair and stick a dress on me I look like the woman I feel I am, but dress me up in gender neutral clothes and it is hard to determine whether I am boy or girl.

[Cin]

It'd make everything a lot easier for me (if I could happiness being androgynous). I am hoping I can find happiness without transitioning.

the big dilemma for me is that there is still a lot I haven't figured out, the thought of marriage, relationships, jobs just don't come to my mind, I don't know how to say this, but I feel like IM too young for all that but i'm already 23 now.

oh well. Ill give it time.

[Jess42]

It'd make everything a lot easier for me (if I could happiness being androgynous). I am hoping I can find happiness without transitioning.

the big dilemma for me is that there is still a lot I haven't figured out, the thought of marriage, relationships, jobs just don't come to my mind, I don't know how to say this, but I feel like IM too young for all that but i'm already 23 now.

oh well. Ill give it time.

Cin, let me put it this way. At 23 I had to supress myself. At 25 I had the freedom to let myself go and really express myself. I was more than happy being sort of androgynous but girly more than boyly. Now I am in my mid 40s and the dysphoria is coming faster, harder and at closer intervals than ever before. Just be prepared for it to be a dynamic thing and what felt right yesterday and good, may not feel right and good tomorrow. Just be prepared. Me it's hitting me like a ton of bricks right now. Jill at 43 decided to go for it. Me at 46, am just now wading a little deeper and thinking of saying to heck with it and going for it.

I just gotta' say, all seriousness aside. Already 23? You want me to send you a rocker and a shawl hon? Now seriously though, you might find a happy medium for a while and maybe forever. That would be nice, but if you are anywhere near dysphoric now, just expect it to get worst with age. It may not for you, but it is for me. But we are all different and unique and truly special.

[Allyda]

Simply put NEVER. I don't really pass and never will and don't care ,people treat me with respect and courtesy that is all I ask.I have been full time since July of 2013 and did not start hrt till Dec 2013 that took a lot of courage but I had no choice it amounted to come out or perish.

Well hello there, it's nice to see your back. Hope you stay and your doing well.

Ali

[stephaniec]

I am currently living in a state of limbo or androgyny mostly out of circumstance rather than choice. I have to say I don't particularly like it, even though I see this as a transitory state for me. I want to be seen as a woman, the woman I always felt I am within. I don't want to be thought of as being androgynous forever to have funny looks or quizzical stares just because the general public isn't sure of the gender I am presenting. To never know if shop assistants should let me go to the mens or ladies changing areas in shops when I want to try on a garment for size. To not be sure if I should chose the men's or ladies' toilet. For the general public to look at me strangely when they see my chest but work out my assigned gender from other traits.

HRT is helping to change my body and looks. Put some make up on, do up my hair and stick a dress on me I look like the woman I feel I am, but dress me up in gender neutral clothes and it is hard to determine whether I am boy or girl.

I'm at this place , but a hair close to tumbling off the cliff into total flight

[Jess42]

I'm at this place , but a hair close to tumbling off the cliff into total flight

A hair isn't that far Hon. I am more or less at a split end of a hair. I just have to work harder with my leathery wings to fly. But hell, if we do all fly, then I know all my prayers have been answered. Unfortunately the leathery wings ought to give it way that my prayers don't get answered. Sorry everyone.

[Emmaline]

Nope.  I am andro now.  Pass me a skirt!

[Cin]

Cin, let me put it this way. At 23 I had to supress myself. At 25 I had the freedom to let myself go and really express myself. I was more than happy being sort of androgynous but girly more than boyly. Now I am in my mid 40s and the dysphoria is coming faster, harder and at closer intervals than ever before. Just be prepared for it to be a dynamic thing and what felt right yesterday and good, may not feel right and good tomorrow. Just be prepared. Me it's hitting me like a ton of bricks right now. Jill at 43 decided to go for it. Me at 46, am just now wading a little deeper and thinking of saying to heck with it and going for it.

I just gotta' say, all seriousness aside. Already 23? You want me to send you a rocker and a shawl hon? Now seriously though, you might find a happy medium for a while and maybe forever. That would be nice, but if you are anywhere near dysphoric now, just expect it to get worst with age. It may not for you, but it is for me. But we are all different and unique and truly special.

Well my dysphoria has gotten worse, I went from thinking I'm just a boy who likes girly stuff, to a boy with preference for feminine gender roles to a guy with interest in crossdressing to.... this.... whatever I am today. It took me 18 years, when I finally started looking for a name for my problem, and people like myself.

[stephaniec]

well, Susan's is a good place to look around

[Jess42]

Well my dysphoria has gotten worse, I went from thinking I'm just a boy who likes girly stuff, to a boy with preference for feminine gender roles to a guy with interest in crossdressing to.... this.... whatever I am today. It took me 18 years, when I finally started looking for a name for my problem, and people like myself.

Cin. I would definitely suggest seeing a gender therapist if it is getting that bad now. What you are today is transgender somewhere in the spectrum. Just where is what you are going to have to decide.

Well you found a place here so welcome Hon. I might suggest to look in the reference library. Susan has made sure there is a lot of informative stuff in the psychology section.

[FalseHybridPrincess]

this is a difficult one...

In my case I present mostly androgynous cause I cant really do otherwise
I dont look nice in a dress, I still have muscles in my arms etc etc
My face isnt that feminine either

What I want to say is that I am personally stuck in that andro phase...
truth is Im steadily moving towards female, thats the path im taking
slow and steady from male to female
but I couldnt stay andro forever,I want to look and feel female, it might take a while to reach this goal but I ll try
everytime someone genders me female I just know that this is what I want

[Aina]

What I want and what I need are two different things.

I want to look and sound like a woman.

If I got stuck being androgynous, I suppose I'd be happy just to be "out" and not hiding.

I think what I need is to stop hiding, but it is darn hard to break that wall and to this extent I can't get what I want till I get what I need...

[Cin]

Cin. I would definitely suggest seeing a gender therapist if it is getting that bad now. What you are today is transgender somewhere in the spectrum. Just where is what you are going to have to decide.

Well you found a place here so welcome Hon. I might suggest to look in the reference library. Susan has made sure there is a lot of informative stuff in the psychology section.

I'm seriously considering telling my mom the whole story, rather than being cryptic about it. I never thought I'd get so far...... but letting my mom in on everything wouldn't be the smart thing to do at the moment, I can't let my emotions take over.

I'm learning new stuff everyday, but I don't really know where I'm going..

I like the androgynous look to be honest, A few years ago I pulled off the look, but my thinning hair just doesn't do it anymore. I'd be happy looking androgynous if I look fem androgynous, and that was how I looked a few years ago, these days I also have facial hair to worry about. Maybe some people can look androgynous and feel female (with or without HRT).

[Cin]

What I want and what I need are two different things.

I want to look and sound like a woman.

If I got stuck being androgynous, I suppose I'd be happy just to be "out" and not hiding.

I think what I need is to stop hiding, but it is darn hard to break that wall and to this extent I can't get what I want till I get what I need...

This.

What I want and I what I need are different. I'm trying to be realistic, but if I could get what I wanted, I think I'd want it all.