Asked if I wanted to go up to the lounge. Declined.

[stephaniec]

well, if some wealthy business man wants to take me for coffee in Istanbul , bring it on.

[Ms Grace]

I've never been in this situation myself, but my immediate reaction is that what makes that invitation creepy is the lack of any attempt at conversation first. A non-creepy version would, IMO, go something like this:

Grace: "Hi."
Man: "Hi, how are you doing?"
Grace: "Fine, other than the heat -- how about you?"
Man: "Yeah, it's a hot one, but I'm coping. Be glad you don't have to wear this damn suit."
Grace: "Oh, I can imagine what that must be like." []
Man: "Where are you headed?"
Grace: "[city I'm unfamiliar with]."
Man: "I've heard it's nice there -- I'm going to [somewhere]. Do you have time to go up to the lounge for a quick drink?"

Without something like that, it's obvious that he'd be after anyone in a skirt.

A total gent! Feel free to ask me up to the lounge if we ever bump into each other at the airport, Tysillo!

[SonadoraXVX]

Yup, Ms. Grace,

That guy had seemed to have lack of social skills. I mean, whatever happened to a hello?, how are you?, and make some polite small conversation about the airport, traffic outside, accents of people, destinations he's about to go too?, and how different it might be?, get a feel for you first, then maybe, just maybe, he can invite you to the lounge, if you obliged. Sounds too much like a wham, bam, thank you mam type.

[liz]

Ms Grace. Maybe it's good for you not to have much attraction to men. I sure cannot say that & I've gotten into trouble several times with a horny man. I cannot resist at all if the man looks nice, I like & enjoy an aggressive man. Even married men that were great at the time but later I felt so bad about getting into a 3 way, no win relationship. Good luck to you down under & thanks for the interesting post.

Those awesome looking guys with this aggressive and persistent style is a real turn on I agree with you.

Well otherwise you did the right thing Grace. If you were not comfortable with the idea, it was better not to accept this offer.

[Tysilio]

A total gent! Feel free to ask me up to the lounge if we ever bump into each other at the airport, Tysillo!

I'd love to, and I hope we do bump into each other someday, Grace -- you are a total lady.

[diane 2606]

Grace, I was never interested in men either, but when I received attention from one I always counted it as validation of the fact that I was functioning as female in society and, thus, had achieved my ultimate goal.

It sounds like you're there, too.

[Arch]

Grace, I was never interested in men either, but when I received attention from one I always counted it as validation of the fact that I was functioning as female in society and, thus, had achieved my ultimate goal.

Funny, everybody reads ME as straight, but women aren't interested. Only the two guys. As clueless as I've been, there may have been more. I just don't think I'm particularly attractive, not like Grace. She's bound to attract male attention.

Anyway, I think that your assessment is dead on, only I've never thought about it from the gay trans man perspective!

[cheryl reeves]

I've had guys ask me out while in male mode,we went and had fun,what was weird was they paid for everything and didn't ask for anything in return,all they wanted was someone too have fun with. I'm not into guys period for I have problems trusting them,besides I prefer women.

[FrancisAnn]

well, if some wealthy business man wants to take me for coffee in Istanbul , bring it on.

hahaha, me too! It's great to be a girl.......so enjoy it I say.

[Ms Grace]

...not like Grace. She's bound to attract male attention.

You're too kind. Thank you

To be honest, before I started transition I never expected I'd be remotely attractive to men. Turns out I was at least partially wrong! That freaked me out at first but I'm adjusting to the reality. I think one of the main reasons I don't get hit on more often is due to my height, very few men (cis or trans) are my height or taller and I know that many men are put off by women who are taller than them.

[stephaniec]

see Grace your more open minded then you thought , breakfast by the China wall

[vickym]

You're too kind. Thank you

To be honest, before I started transition I never expected I'd be remotely attractive to men. Turns out I was at least partially wrong! That freaked me out at first but I'm adjusting to the reality. I think one of the main reasons I don't get hit on more often is due to my height, very few men (cis or trans) are my height or taller and I know that many men are put off by women who are taller than them.

A cis friend of mine who is very tall experiences this too and her solution is to sit down as soon as she can at social gatherings,parties etc.It works to for her because guys often have this thing about needing to be taller than a woman which can mess with their heads a bit but if shes sat down they can just talk.Bizarre but true.My height has never been an issue(I'm  6 foot).Being chatted up in a nice respectful way is fine and can be lots of fun but I've also experienced some downright seedy approaches.It's upsetting and rude so I don't tolerate it.

[FrancisAnn]

It is funny about height. I've had a lot of men about my height, 5'9" have interest & be very aggressive to date. However even if they were very nice it just did not seem right. However with a taller man it seemed very easy to become attracted. Even much taller men like 6 ft or taller seemed very right for me. I normally like a little heel, 2-3 inches maybe so a much taller man seemed like a better match. I hate to admit it but with on line dating I would ask a man if he was well endowed? Men seem to want to see & know everything about us so I decided to find out first about the man. I was never excited about a man with a small penis, no matter what. It's so hard for us to find the right match I guess.  Good luck to us all.