Questions about transitioning and my career

[jill610]

people genuinely don't seem to care about your gender.

This ^^

How you handle yourself is the biggest factor in how you will be treated, short of working with or for a truly bigoted person, especially in a niche or white collar job. The cost to source a position is high.

I have seen a LOT of people become very defensive, inflexible and lose their sense of humor. That's what will get you fired. Just be you and you'll be fine, in the US anyways.

Just keep doing your job objectively well, to the best of your abilities.

[jill610]

No, this is an issue for those who are gifted.

People don't like change.  If you start changing things people get nervous.  And if you change things a lot people get uncomfortable, very uncomfortable.

A good example is competitions.  If you come up with a big innovation it will often get banned.  Better to win by just a little, than a lot.

I think getting twice as much work done as anyone else on staff will make you co-workers uncomfortable. Sure, the boss might be happy, but not the folks at your pay grade.  The goal should be to maximize the work done by the entire team.

Just because everyone around you settles for mediocrity doesn't mean you should. Who cares what your peers think, if you are twice as good, then let them be the ones to suffer by under performance.

Big innovations don't often get banned, that's a pretty defeatist view of the world. Yes occasionally something does if it appears to threaten a core societal value or be dangerous but those are far in between.

[Maid Marion]

I think for many of us it is better to compromise and use those talents in a less threatening manner.
The world of work is just one part of our lives.  And for most of us, something that is interchangeable whether we like it or not.  Gone are the days in which you could work at Sears or Woolworth all your lives.

Yes, you can certainly find an ally for great ideas who will protect you while you work at full speed.  But, don't expect a manager to take you along when she gets promoted. 

[Sophiaprincess2019]

Gone are the days in which you could work at Sears or Woolworth all your lives.

Isn't that the truth sister! I know like 2 people who have worked the same job over 30 years. Besides they might tear down the Sears you wanted to work all your career, just look at Woolworth!

[Linde]

Isn't that the truth sister! I know like 2 people who have worked the same job over 30 years. Besides they might tear down the Sears you wanted to work all your career, just look at Woolworth!

And now you know 3 who worked that long for the same company, in increasing job responsibilities!
I retired from them after 36 years!  Never planed to be there that long, but work was fun, the company was good and fair, and one year added to the next!
And my employer is growing, and is one of the companies that is a base for the Dow Jones figures, and among the Fortune 25.
Big companies can be good companies and good employers!

[Sophiaprincess2019]

And now you know 3 who worked that long for the same company, in increasing job responsibilities!
I retired from them after 36 years!

WHAT???....36 years, how can that be? you barely look 36 years old!....You are doing great!

Hugs....

Sophia

[kittie.cassie]

I'm curious.  Do any of your coworkers suspect you're TG, by either hearsay or your outward appearance?  They may be more accepting if they kind of think of you that way already, and still respect you.

Just a thought.

I've actually legitimately told two people where I work.  One of them seems just kind of ok with it, and he's been my best friend for several years.  The other is really ok with it, and she's always ok with talking about it. 

I think one other person is kind of questioning it, but that's just what I've heard.

[kittie.cassie]

I work (in the UK) in IT for a major pharmaceutical business. I transitioned on the job almost two years ago, and have since both applied and got internal role vacancies. The wonderful thing about the tech/science industry is that if you've got the skills, people genuinely don't seem to care about your gender. I've travelled internationally, and been to and spoken at many conferences, without a single issue.

Transition is a personal matter, do it if it's the right thing for you, not others.

Do remember that while it may seem like a two-sided coin, the huge non-binary reality in the middle also exists. If you feel you wish to proceed, just take one step at a time until you find what works for you.

Good luck. [emoji846]

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk

I'm pretty sure just staying in the middle won't work for me.  I'm hoping it works out as well for me, that would simply be amazing!

However, I think I'm going to use my current job to start and once everything is out I plan on moving to Arizona (Phoenix area) and find a job there.  That way, everybody just knows me as a girl and not knowing me in boy mode.  I figure it will probably be easier that way.  I'll just have to deal with the awkwardness where I'm at now since everybody has only known boy me.

[kittie.cassie]

This ^^

How you handle yourself is the biggest factor in how you will be treated, short of working with or for a truly bigoted person, especially in a niche or white collar job. The cost to source a position is high.

I have seen a LOT of people become very defensive, inflexible and lose their sense of humor. That's what will get you fired. Just be you and you'll be fine, in the US anyways.

Just keep doing your job objectively well, to the best of your abilities.

I think my plan of action is to not make a huge deal of transitioning.  I have the advantage of being fairly chill.  I'll just do my thing and if people question anything I'll tell them.  I feel like a slow and methodical approach would be the best, rather than making a huge spectacle of it.

[Linde]

WHAT???....36 years, how can that be? you barely look 36 years old!....You are doing great!

Hugs....

Sophia

Thank you!  That picture was taken after real good makeup with contouring.  I look about 20 to 25 years younger than my biological age, because I never got adult skin  (them intersex babies again).  I will be 76 years old very soon now!

[Sophiaprincess2019]

I recently interviewed for a new position and told them I was transitioning during the interview process. I was embraced for being brave and welcomed with open arms. Much to my surprise HR called yesterday and said they are moving forward with an offer later this week after references have been contacted. I've found being open right from the beginning was the best route for me work wise.

Sophia

[Iztaccihuatl]

I recently interviewed for a new position and told them I was transitioning during the interview process. I was embraced for being brave and welcomed with open arms. Much to my surprise HR called yesterday and said they are moving forward with an offer later this week after references have been contacted. I've found being open right from the beginning was the best route for me work wise.

Sophia

Congratulations! I am so happy for you that everything worked out and that you seem to have found a really cool employer!

HM

[CynthiaAnn]

I recently interviewed for a new position and told them I was transitioning during the interview process. I was embraced for being brave and welcomed with open arms. Much to my surprise HR called yesterday and said they are moving forward with an offer later this week after references have been contacted. I've found being open right from the beginning was the best route for me work wise.

Sophia

Way to go !!

C -

[CindyLouFromCO]

I read somewhere that Cisco works with trans folks fairly well, and since I've already earned certs I'm assuming they'd be transferrable (or at least still applicable using a deadname?

Another concern is related to any laws or protections in place?  Like, I know laws say stuff about gender and that stuff, but I'm afraid my management team would try to force me out using hostile tactics or just slowly phasing me out since I'm in a right to work state (Colorado).  I did email my HR department anonymously asking about it, and I was assured nothing would happen (and those original emails are saved for proof).  Has anybody had any negative experiences along these lines?

As Mentioned a lot of transgender people are in IT.

You can have your name changed on your certificates.  I just sent them my updated ID's with a copy of my current certs.

I have had all of my education background updated that is on file.  From high school to college to my IT certs. 

The company I work for has very strict transgender policies.  The company is a very well known large global IT company.  The company is very progressive.

A employee can not even disclose to another that I am transgender if they know or think they know.  However they can only enforce their policies as much as the country or state allows.  The state my office is in does have discrimination protections.  The offices in Missouri is in a state that does not have discrimination protections.  Company policies do apply in the Missouri office though.

I wish you all the best in your IT transition!