Being approached by males

[Nigella]

Hi all,

I had a very strange encounter the other day. I was shopping in an electrical department store for a new phone for the house. I was looking at this particular phone when this man walks up to me and starts asking me if I know where such and such a store is (yea right next door, lol). Anyway he proceeds to talk about the weather (rather cold here) and as he begins to walk away asks if I wanted to go for a coffee.

I didn't know this man at all and was rather disturbed by this and said no thank you. He did walk away thankfully. I'm not in a place to complicate my life with relationships right now whatever they might be anyway.

I was just struck by the fact that did he really think I was going to say yes I will go with you a complete stranger and have coffee, duh.

Stardust

[tekla]

I've seen it work.  A cup of coffee is not a commitment, and its a very public open place.

[mmelny]

I didn't know this man at all and was rather disturbed by this and said no thank you. He did walk away thankfully. I'm not in a place to complicate my life with relationships right now whatever they might be anyway.

I was just struck by the fact that did he really think I was going to say yes I will go with you a complete stranger and have coffee, duh.

Stardust

Hi Stardust,

Congratulations on being "hit on"  !  I would be cautiously flattered, but flattered nevertheless, another grand event in your progress *smiles*.

No harm in a little java, as long as it's very public like tekla said.  Keep your name (like on a credit card, etc) hidden away, try to pay cash, but hopefully he's buying anyway !

*huggs*,
Melan

[Nigella]

Hi Stardust,

Congratulations on being "hit on"  !  I would be cautiously flattered, but flattered nevertheless, another grand event in your progress *smiles*.

No harm in a little java, as long as it's very public like tekla said.  Keep your name (like on a credit card, etc) hidden away, try to pay cash, but hopefully he's buying anyway !

*huggs*,
Melan

Does this mean I've made it? yes I was flattered and I became rather shy in my reply. He was probably partially sighted though, lol.

I haven't dated for 30 years and I don't know if I could ever say yes in this kind of situation, unless as you say Melan, he's buying, lol. Thanks for the tips as well.

Stardust

[Lisbeth]

Men are like that. Get used to it.

[Jay]

I've seen it work.  A cup of coffee is not a commitment, and its a very public open place.

I agree with this.

[tekla]

It's better than "Oh baby, heaven must be missing an angel 'cause she's right here in front of me.  Can I buy you a drink."  Which, by the way, I've also seen work.

[Julie Marie]

I've had men come up to me and say "My room number is... Why don't you come up later" or hand me a napkin and say, "Here's the address to my house. Why don't you stop by and we can have some fun!"

Are these guys on drugs!  Do they honestly think I'm going to bite on something like that?

Two guys hit on me saying their wife was dead "God rest her soul" and it would make her so happy if they found some love.    Another guy buys me and my GF drinks.  When we thank him he scurries over to talk to us.  He's all smiles but makes the mistake of mentioning he has kids.  So I turn the conversation to focus totally on his kids.  Every time he tried to get off it I went right back to the kids.  It was like throwing water on a fire.  Finally he said, "I thought you girls would be fun!" and left.

Naturally none of their nonsense got them anywhere!  But it never ceases to amaze me how much BS a guy will spew out in hopes of getting a piece.

Julie

[tekla]

I come from the world of "I can get you backstage, ask me how."  Don't even need to buy them a drink.

[Nigella]

Are these guys on drugs!  Do they honestly think I'm going to bite on something like that?

But it never ceases to amaze me how much BS a guy will spew out in hopes of getting a piece.

Julie

I still can not believe how stupid it is thinking I would say yes. I do have a brain, I was never ever like that and I suppose I never related to that, well I suppose it comes down to having brains in your pants instead of your head, lol.

Just a side comment, I like your tactic Julie and lots of fun too, lol.

Stardust

[Renate]

I guess that I'm more adventurous, stupid or like coffee more.
I would have accepted a cup of coffee from anybody, male or female, that I didn't perceive as a threat.

I've met a lot of "interesting" people by generally accepting offers.

The other week, I accepted an offer from a man to come over to his house for a drink after work.
I specified that the drink be coffee and I limited the activity to conversation.
He was quite unrealistically expecting more. Oh, well, too bad for him.

That a man has children does not rule him out; I've heard that people get divorced nowadays.

Besides, I'm not even sure that I like men. How else am I to find out?

[Kimberly]

I guess that I'm more adventurous, stupid or like coffee more.
I would have accepted a cup of coffee from anybody, male or female, that I didn't perceive as a threat.

I am glad I am not the only one. While I doubt I would have accepted the offer were I single and interested I do not see anything wrong with asking a woman to coffee at a public place. In fact, to be frank, it strikes me as one of the better options. Some stranger's house however... not in a million years. But isn't it all so wonderful how diverse it all is? I think so anyway..

[Janet_Girl]

I have only ever be asked once of a 'date'.  A guy in my park left a letter on my car and asked if I would like to come over and watch movies.  I wasn't interested in him.

Since then nothing.  Wonder what I am doing wrong or not doing.  Maybe i should put my simulated wedding rings back on.

Janet

[Cindy]

It's normal for girls to  be hit upon by guys, I think it has something to do with butterflies, birds  and bees. Never heard the story. Did anyone?

If you are comfortable in a public place; accept. If you are unsure don't. Don't agree to meetings in private/lonely places. Ask for his phone number, only ever give yours  if it's a mobile  (cell number). Flirt: it's fun. But be careful.
Ahh would love it!

Be careful
Cindy James 

[Monique Martinez]

I only get approached by weirdos and creeps. Which is fair enough.. I dont exactly have what a studmuffin is looking for just yet.    

[Steph]

Well i'm afraid all those lines work on me especially the one about an angel missing in heaven.  I have no problem having a coffee with someone as long as it's a public place.  After all, as others have said there's no commitment and hey you just may hit it off.

i know, i know i'm just too easy, but it is fun, especially if they buy.

steph

[Pica Pica]

i've seen, 'you don't sweat much for a fat girl' nearly work.

[tekla]

Well i'm afraid all those lines work on me especially the one about an angel missing in heaven.

Told 'ya it worked.  By the way, the reason that men do that is to separate the wheat from the chaff.  The people who will not play with the lines, will not play in bed either.  It eliminates the dull right off the bat.

Life is way too short to have to put up with boring sexual partners.

[Pica Pica]

  how heartless.

[tekla]

still, its true.