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Dating straight guys?

Started by Britney♥Bieber, September 10, 2010, 06:13:31 PM

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Britney♥Bieber

I'm happy for you Sam but I can't handle looking anymore. I looked hard enough as a male and never found anyone, so I'm done looking.

Veronica Morph

Hi there, I am a straight guy living anormal man life and from time to time i dress like in the picture just for fun and nothing else.
I would say just be yourself be a woman in everyaspect, and ndont enphasize too much on your nature or your transition story, if the guy wont ask you, but try to say briefly who you are in a special moment and what you want, to be a real woman and be in a real couple, if the guy see you as the woman you are as his woman of his dreams there you go....nothing much simple as this.

what else are you asking to be answered dont complicate the situation more, it is already complicated the moment you decided to be a woman, deal better with what you have to do and forget the ssumptions everyperson is different and is mistaken to thing every straigh guy will act the same, look at me in the pic, do i look starigh to you if i see you at the club? iam and i never experienced something diffeent, if you see me in man mode you wont believe i like this thing of cding on sparetime.
so be carefull on assumptions go for it good luck
Veronica Morph
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ggina

He definitely makes a point. I just wonder what it is :)
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: ggina on September 14, 2010, 11:38:02 AM
He definitely makes a point. I just wonder what it is :)

I kinda think he's trying to say not to judge people? :S

Izumi

Quote from: KimberlyJean on September 10, 2010, 06:13:31 PM
I keep hearing from people that they don't think a straight guy would be okay with dating a transgender woman and it's getting to me more and more. Like do I transition and risk ending up alone? Or do I stay in this body as much as I hate it, and increase my chances of not being alone? I mean thinking about not transitioning is such an unhappy thought for me but idk I'm just really scared right now. I've never felt more upset about my body and being born male than I do. It's just getting to me and I'm scared. :(

Heh my fiance is a str8 guy, trust me i know, he wants nothing to do with what is downstairs, he doesnt want to see it or talk about it, which is good because neither do I.  So far we have been living together for 3 months with no issues and still very much in love with each other.  He knows i am TS, but he didnt at first, but too late heh, he was already in love and decided to continue to court me.  I guess he didnt see anything "man" about me.  I am really amazed that he can feel this way because its not typical, but a lot of str8 guys marry TS women, either they know and are really in love with them anyway, or dont have a clue even after they are married if their post op. 

I thought the same way you did, i would end up a lone, but i did my best with what i had to work with and was determined to be the best woman i could be regardless of that fact, what i found was, if your a good person, and happy with yourself, you attract other people to you.  Some are guys and they ask you out, they like you and ask you out again.  Eventually you wil have to tell them, but only if your serious about each other, although i always dreaded that part.
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Izumi on September 14, 2010, 12:16:31 PM
Heh my fiance is a str8 guy, trust me i know, he wants nothing to do with what is downstairs, he doesnt want to see it or talk about it, which is good because neither do I.  So far we have been living together for 3 months with no issues and still very much in love with each other.  He knows i am TS, but he didnt at first, but too late heh, he was already in love and decided to continue to court me.  I guess he didnt see anything "man" about me.  I am really amazed that he can feel this way because its not typical, but a lot of str8 guys marry TS women, either they know and are really in love with them anyway, or dont have a clue even after they are married if their post op. 

I thought the same way you did, i would end up a lone, but i did my best with what i had to work with and was determined to be the best woman i could be regardless of that fact, what i found was, if your a good person, and happy with yourself, you attract other people to you.  Some are guys and they ask you out, they like you and ask you out again.  Eventually you wil have to tell them, but only if your serious about each other, although i always dreaded that part.

I hope my transition goes as well as yours has. But not all of us can look like you, which I'm sure helped in finding a fiance. :P Dating is just something that scares me sometimes. I've never been on a date. I always wanted to though. So I just feel like well if I can't find someone to want me as a boy who's gonna want me when I'm in between or when I'm transitioned. Even though my best friend says I'll find someone, she's said since I met her, and that was like 5 years ago and nothing. =X

clairezoey

do u really need a guy? want important is money..let alone bf.,..
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Izumi

Quote from: KimberlyJean on September 14, 2010, 12:40:16 PM
I hope my transition goes as well as yours has. But not all of us can look like you, which I'm sure helped in finding a fiance. :P Dating is just something that scares me sometimes. I've never been on a date. I always wanted to though. So I just feel like well if I can't find someone to want me as a boy who's gonna want me when I'm in between or when I'm transitioned. Even though my best friend says I'll find someone, she's said since I met her, and that was like 5 years ago and nothing. =X

How long have you been on HRT? and looks can be bought, thats how hollywood does it anyway.  For 30-40K of FFS surgery you can look pretty good.  Even i intend to get some to fix problems here and there i dont like.

Here is something interesting, all the things that made me not accepted as date material when i was a guy, is now super guy attractant as a girl.  I am like some geeky guy's dream girl apparently.  I am a hardcore video gamer, do sports like airsoft and surfing, i keep in shape so my body is not bad to look at, I like things like manga / cosplay / anime, computers, etc... heh, i can also cook really well since i have been doing it since i was 7. All the stuff that made me a total girl repellent before is a total turn on for guys... kind of ironic.  Now if i was just not TS, it would be perfect. 

The key in all this also is also knowing when to date, i didnt till about 6 months after i went full time, by then i looked pretty much like a girl and people were already asking me out.  I wasnt the best looking girl in the room but men liked to talk to me and my personality.  I find it much easier to deal with men now that I am a girl rather then a guy... i couldnt relate to them at all, now things like relationships with men and women seem simple and i always wondered if that is what its like when you grow up gg....?

Here are some tips on dating:

#1) BE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF.  lets face it, if you dont like you, why should anyone else
#2) Look your best if you want to make a first impression.  Classy not trashy.  You dont need less cloths even, guys like a little mystery.
#3) Let HRT time to work.  If its only been 6 months, might want to wait longer maybe a year to year and half, your fats start to distribute better giving your face a better appearance and also your body, if you want str8 guys that is.
#4) Scent is important smell as good as you look.
#5) Relax and enjoy yourself, dont make like your looking or desperate, the more you look like you are enjoying yourself at a party or event with friends the more attractive you look.
#6) Wear clothing that accentuate your GOOD features and minimize the bad. 
#7) Makeup done right.  Natural is usually the best way to go, with not a too made up look. 
#8) Know what to look for in someone.  Dont just jump on the first person that asks you out, if they are a scumbag drop em!
#9) Online dating... pfffffffft.. found no one of value on free sites, just losers.  Payed sites like eharmony, i have known people that it worked out.
#10) Manners appropriate for the occasion.

Thats all i can think of.
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Izumi on September 14, 2010, 01:27:41 PM
How long have you been on HRT? and looks can be bought, thats how hollywood does it anyway.  For 30-40K of FFS surgery you can look pretty good.  Even i intend to get some to fix problems here and there i dont like.

Here is something interesting, all the things that made me not accepted as date material when i was a guy, is now super guy attractant as a girl.  I am like some geeky guy's dream girl apparently.  I am a hardcore video gamer, do sports like airsoft and surfing, i keep in shape so my body is not bad to look at, I like things like manga / cosplay / anime, computers, etc... heh, i can also cook really well since i have been doing it since i was 7. All the stuff that made me a total girl repellent before is a total turn on for guys... kind of ironic.  Now if i was just not TS, it would be perfect. 

The key in all this also is also knowing when to date, i didnt till about 6 months after i went full time, by then i looked pretty much like a girl and people were already asking me out.  I wasnt the best looking girl in the room but men liked to talk to me and my personality.  I find it much easier to deal with men now that I am a girl rather then a guy... i couldnt relate to them at all, now things like relationships with men and women seem simple and i always wondered if that is what its like when you grow up gg....?

Here are some tips on dating:

#1) BE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF.  lets face it, if you dont like you, why should anyone else
#2) Look your best if you want to make a first impression.  Classy not trashy.  You dont need less cloths even, guys like a little mystery.
#3) Let HRT time to work.  If its only been 6 months, might want to wait longer maybe a year to year and half, your fats start to distribute better giving your face a better appearance and also your body, if you want str8 guys that is.
#4) Scent is important smell as good as you look.
#5) Relax and enjoy yourself, dont make like your looking or desperate, the more you look like you are enjoying yourself at a party or event with friends the more attractive you look.
#6) Wear clothing that accentuate your GOOD features and minimize the bad. 
#7) Makeup done right.  Natural is usually the best way to go, with not a too made up look. 
#8) Know what to look for in someone.  Dont just jump on the first person that asks you out, if they are a scumbag drop em!
#9) Online dating... pfffffffft.. found no one of value on free sites, just losers.  Payed sites like eharmony, i have known people that it worked out.
#10) Manners appropriate for the occasion.

Thats all i can think of.

I haven't started hormones yet, and I wish I could get FFS but I don't even know how I'll pay for srs let alone ffs :( But thanks for the tips.

Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: clairezoey on September 14, 2010, 01:17:58 PM
do u really need a guy? want important is money..let alone bf.,..

eww greedy much?

clairezoey

well life is not fairy tale. how many real womens that hard to find soulmates and focus on being a careerr women at early 20's age. and only mariage at 30's. we trans women are the same, dont focus too much on this. love comes when the times right, love cant be force. for time being just improve urself and being rich. find a job, get nice paid,  enjoy life with ur frens 1st...do u trans to women to get love from man or want to live as a women? its ur call
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Izumi

Quote from: KimberlyJean on September 14, 2010, 01:43:07 PM
I haven't started hormones yet, and I wish I could get FFS but I don't even know how I'll pay for srs let alone ffs :( But thanks for the tips.

Well there is your problem heh, get some HRT girl! hard to feel like a woman when you get tons of testosterone pumping throughout your system... estrogen is much more refreshing.... aaah~
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ggina

Quote from: Izumi on September 14, 2010, 02:18:28 PM
estrogen is much more refreshing.... aaah~

cheers to that :) *drinks juice*
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Izumi on September 14, 2010, 02:18:28 PM
Well there is your problem heh, get some HRT girl! hard to feel like a woman when you get tons of testosterone pumping throughout your system... estrogen is much more refreshing.... aaah~

I'm trying. I have my appointment on the 29th but I have no idea how I'm going to get on hormones, I have no money and no one will hire me.

Izumi

Quote from: KimberlyJean on September 14, 2010, 04:08:23 PM
I'm trying. I have my appointment on the 29th but I have no idea how I'm going to get on hormones, I have no money and no one will hire me.

well, that is for you to figure out, all i can say is i know how you feel, i too was in that position, didnt know how i would get money or even survive, down to my last dollar, but it was too important for me to transition right, I did anything and everything and never stopped trying no matter what or how many times i was rejected.  Luckily after search 6 months and down to my last dollar, i got a job and turned my whole life around, i went from not having anything to now being able to afford SRS by next year.   

All i can say is do EVERY thing you can and never believe you cant do something.  Take any job you can get to get by until you find what you are looking for.  If one job isnt enough get two, i did.  If you want something badly enough fight for it and never give up.
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James42

Quote from: Izumi on September 14, 2010, 02:18:28 PM
Well there is your problem heh, get some HRT girl! hard to feel like a woman when you get tons of testosterone pumping throughout your system... estrogen is much more refreshing.... aaah~

I don't feel refreshed.... sorry, a jerk moment

Sorry for interrupting again too, I get email notifications on topics so I'm not trying to stalk (izumi :P)
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Britney♥Bieber

Quote from: Izumi on September 14, 2010, 07:51:37 PM
well, that is for you to figure out, all i can say is i know how you feel, i too was in that position, didnt know how i would get money or even survive, down to my last dollar, but it was too important for me to transition right, I did anything and everything and never stopped trying no matter what or how many times i was rejected.  Luckily after search 6 months and down to my last dollar, i got a job and turned my whole life around, i went from not having anything to now being able to afford SRS by next year.   

All i can say is do EVERY thing you can and never believe you cant do something.  Take any job you can get to get by until you find what you are looking for.  If one job isnt enough get two, i did.  If you want something badly enough fight for it and never give up.

I'm willing to take any job, just for some reason no one will hire me. I had an interview last week and I went in for a small shift so they could see how I'd work and I got turned down. Why? They weren't convinced. I did nothing wrong, they just weren't convinced. Whatever that means. :( It's just really frustrating when I'm looking for a job for more than a year and nothing, all my friends apply to like one or two places and they have a job they love. I don't get it. Like it's bad enough I was born in the wrong body but why can't I at least get the opportunity to fix it? I'm willing to work! Well I had another interview today, she said she liked me and she would give her managers good feedback and they'll make the decision. So I hope that means something :(

V M

They said they were not convinced? That means they like you but want to make sure you want the job

If you do want the job... Call them back, even go in and tell (politely) them that you will call or be there every day until they are convinced
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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April Dawne

Good advice, Virginia! Maybe they wanted to see what you would do?

At any rate, I know things will turn around for you =] just keep your chin up, smile, and go in there as if you know you are the right person for the job.

Good advice from Izumi too! =]

Hugs Kimberly!

<3 MOM heehee

~*Don't wanna look without seeing*~

~*Don't wanna touch without feeling*~




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