Well, I've kept from posting on this thread the past week, and I'm glad I did. Things have changed for the better, mostly.
My best friend is still my best friend, and that means the world to me.
Of the 15 or so other salespeople, there are 3 who flat out hate this.
All 4 of the other people in my own department are totally supportive, and life goes on as it did before, with the exception that they all call me Bev, usually, or sometimes Beverly, and almost never mess up the pronouns, and are striving for perfection. One of them calls me Mike once in a great while, when no one else is there to hear, but hardly ever. He also refers to me as Bev when he calls on the phone, even though there is no one there to be a reason to do so. He has just accepted me as Bev, and now asks quite a few questions. Very inquisitive, and quite bright, he is one of the few people who look at me carefully, and see female, not male. Another young salesman in my old department was talking to me yesterday, and suddenly said, "Bev....you really are a woman.....it's true, isn't it?" I told him that's what I've been trying to tell him all along. Now he GETS it.
I could not ask for more support on that front....my own department. In the department I just left, I am sort of, to somewhat supported. Some make an effort to refer to me as Bev, and she. One person there, who has bothered to look into ts recently calls me Bev or Beverly, and she or her EVERY time. A surprise: In that same department, the ex-cop who was dissing the ts community before he knew I was ts, has turned out to be quite a nice guy. He didn't go back to our previous conversation, but has been very obviously 'pro' Bev with the people he works with, and treats me with friendly respect, the same as before. He always refers to me as Bev, and she, or her. Mostly we talk about work, and our families. I would never have guessed that would happen.
The managers are uniformly friendly, accepting, and professional, and call me Bev, and use appropriate pronouns.
So, out of 15 salespeople, I have 5 people who totally support me, 7 people who somewhat support me, and 3 hate, me.
Now....about the customers: I am usually seen as a woman, without question. I am sometimes looked at as a woman....but....maybe not? Depends on the day. Then, there was one day that I got 'sirr'ed' all damned day! My therapist asked how that made me feel....."How?.....Frustrated!, that's how". Then, the very next day, I was ma'amed all day.
One interesting thing happened: A customer of mine from several weeks ago came back to see me. We spoke a bit, then I gently pointed out to her that I might look a little different (well....yah! lol). She smiled, and I showed her my new name tag. She said, "well, congratulations Beverly! Do you have a new business card for me so I can throw the old one away?" I was stunned. Happy, calm, but....stunned.
There were more than a few days where I could not hook up with a single person for lunch. Meanwhile, I got the local mall food court servers at the Chinese place to get used to serving Bev. They saw the name tag, but were still unsure. So, one day, I paid with a credit card with Bev's name on it. What a lot of chatter that started! The next day, they called me 'Miss', and have given me appropriately smaller portions since.
It's all been quite a roller coaster ride. One day, I want off the coaster, the next, I can't imagine why I would want off. In any case, there's no going back. This is a one-way ride.
Bev, hangin' in there
