Not sure where to start, I tried asking SRS Surgeons, but I can't get an answer.

I want a vagina more than I want to continue living. I'm serious, if I knew for a fact that my death would result in me entering an afterlife where I no longer had a penis I would throw slut my throat and watch the blood pour out, smiling as I held the knowledge that each drop would bring me a little closer to my happiness as an anatomically correct woman. No longer containing the visage or function of the man that I am not. So what if I was dead, it would be damn worth it.

It's a thought that I know sounds macabre, but I find it romantic. And that's exactly why I want a vagina so badly. I don't want to be this way anymore. Hating myself so much that I beg to be set free even if by death. I want to wear panties and have them fit, I want to put my hand inside my undergarments and be able to feel myself on the inside, I want to wear a bikini without a questionable bulge, I want to end having an erection when I'm horny.

I don't have the money right now, but I'm trying to become a welder so that I can get a good job to get the money. Right now I'm unemployed, but have 1,220 set aside specificially for medical based expenses.

I've been on hormones for two years, seeing a therapist for two and a half years, and will soon be launching a fundraiser on Indiegogo. Any advice on how to get started with SRS, what paperwork I need, what grants I may qualify for, what doctors I can be recommended (I live in North Carolina, Castle Hayne), and if I can avoid travel to Thailand (would rather not get international travel involved, that sounds like it'd just make it more expensive, not cheaper.) but if Thailand was absolutely where I'd have to go than I would do it. In January I'm going to try and get a passport just in case. (Though my name and sex aren't changed on my birth certificate, they are with Social Security and my license)

Any help ending this curse that is my junk (never before is it so appropiately entitled junk than when it's this unwanted) would be greatly appreciated. I literally have no idea how I'd start this process. Just that I need electrolysis.

Not sure why you could not get this information from the SRS centers of what they need you to get before SRS.
I know most of the top SRS doctors use the WPATH standards as the paperwork needed before.
A fyi Dr Brassard (canada) i had to have 2 letters from my GID therapists, 1 letter from my Endo and at least 1 year 100% RLT. Normal blood work and EKG.

I would look around, there are some good SRS doctors in north american. You will see many listed here. Also there are many who go overseas and have had both good and bad times.

But as anything you get what you pay for, some are more but offer more services then others who are cheaper. You need to do your own research and feel inside your choice is for you.

Good luck. Also this new AHA in the states has stopped a lot of the transgender exclusions from policies.

Izzy

What's an SRS Center?

Thank you, I'll look into Dr. Brassard. I'm quite poor so I want to try as little travel as possible.

Papillon Center
18 Village Row, Suite 43
Logan Square
Lower York Road (202)
New Hope, PA 18938
Dr McGinn

The Philadelphia Center For Transgender Surgery
19 Montgomery Ave.
Bala Cynwyd, PA  19004
Phone:  610-667-1888 
Dr. Sherman Leis

The Reed Centre for Genital Surgery
Harold M. Reed, M.D., F.I.C.S.
1111 Kane Concourse, Suite #311, Bay Harbor Islands
Florida 33154-2041

Etc, Etc, do a search in your area or do a search here in the search section.

Izzy