Quote from: kellizgirl on December 18, 2013, 08:11:47 AM
... You have a friend in Ohio!

Thank you Kelli.  I feel the same about Susan's.  It's a beautiful thing to have you and the rest of the girls here when everything falls apart.  Sometimes there's no place to go, and sadness can't be burried.

I'll be talking to my sons today, and I know I'm going to be crying.  ->-bleeped-<-, I'm crying now.  Funny how I've nearly completely erased every piece of my old life in 18 months. 

K

That is one of my biggest fears moving forward. I have 5 kids 22, 18, 15, 6, and 5. If I could no longer be in their life I am not sure if I could handle that. They have no idea yet, but the day of revelation is getting closer and I have no idea how they will take the news. I am scared as hell, but I can no longer live the lie!

Quote from: kellizgirl on December 18, 2013, 10:33:24 AM
That is one of my biggest fears moving forward. I have 5 kids 22, 18, 15, 6, and 5. If I could no longer be in their life I am not sure if I could handle that. They have no idea yet, but the day of revelation is getting closer and I have no idea how they will take the news. I am scared as hell, but I can no longer live the lie!

I also have 5 kids,  21 to 13... and all of them love me just the way I am... they did know since they can remember, however, we went through the transition and divorce together, and well, there were some hard times. interestingly, my youngest one was , a girl, was and is the most zealot defender, she has call me Mom since forever.  My 17 YO boy has gone to blows to defend me, God bless his heart...I think it was the hardest for my old boy...but now after a few years he even joke about...

So, be yourself, share your emotions, and feelings with them, listen to what they have to said...and well ....



all the best,

Peky

Quote from: kellizgirl on December 18, 2013, 10:33:24 AM
That is one of my biggest fears moving forward. I have 5 kids 22, 18, 15, 6, and 5. If I could no longer be in their life I am not sure if I could handle that. They have no idea yet, but the day of revelation is getting closer and I have no idea how they will take the news. I am scared as hell, but I can no longer live the lie!

I have two daughters in college, and I'm recently out to both of them. The oldest one has some gay friends and some cool views on LGBT people and I think she would immediately stand up and defend who I am to anyone in a heartbeat. The youngest one is still exploring how she feels; it's all new to her and it'll take awhile but she hasn't rejected me. She is coming to see me for Christmas and hopefully we will get a chance to talk and I can explain some things to her.

My thoughts are with you; it's one of the hardest things i've ever had to do. Hopefully it will go well.

Quote from: kathyk on December 18, 2013, 09:05:38 AM


Thank you Kelli.  I feel the same about Susan's.  It's a beautiful thing to have you and the rest of the girls here when everything falls apart.  Sometimes there's no place to go, and sadness can't be burried.

I'll be talking to my sons today, and I know I'm going to be crying.  ->-bleeped-<-, I'm crying now.  Funny how I've nearly completely erased every piece of my old life in 18 months. 

K

Your old life was built on the premise that you were a man. You were a woman and you needed to set yourself free. Your old life/self lives on inside your heart.

You may feel sad about the changes, but you made a choice to live. No one in this world can blame someone or point their finger at someone for wanting to live. Everyone has a right to live and those who cannot accept you or make you feel bad about yourself are projecting their negative thoughts onto you. It's not our fault that we were born this way. No one can make you feel inferior unless you give them your consent to do so.

Thank you to everyone, I feel like a real loser today. I had to listen to my wife cry herself to sleep last night. I am very depressed. I am just rying to get through today. kathk I hope your days get brighter. Love all my sisters on Susan's, thank God for everyone of you!

Quote from: kellizgirl on December 19, 2013, 10:35:20 AM
... I feel like a real loser today. I had to listen to my wife cry herself to sleep last night. I am very depressed. ....

Oh God I hate it when that happens.  I feel for you and your wife, and wish there was something more to say as a comfort.  But the relationship between a husband and wife is so intimate that even other married persons can't really understand how another couple is effected by all this. 

The last time JoAnn cried for an hour in bed was when my transition caused our  son and his wife to cancel a part of our thanksgiving.  She felt worst about it than I did, and it hurt me deeply.

K

Quote from: kellizgirl on December 19, 2013, 10:35:20 AM
Thank you to everyone, I feel like a real loser today. I had to listen to my wife cry herself to sleep last night. I am very depressed. I am just rying to get through today. kathk I hope your days get brighter. Love all my sisters on Susan's, thank God for everyone of you!

To Kelli and Kathy I can only say I totally empathise with what you are both going through. So am I ... marriage falling apart: check! terrified about the effect on my kids: check! miserable Christmas: check! beloved family home being sold, and with it all my hopeless dreams of a 'normal' family life as a husband and father: check!

BUT ... determined to go ahead and find my true self: check, check, CHECK!!