Katie, I am sure that with your understanding at least one aspect of the life changes that accompany your coming out, that it will help. It takes understanding, compromise on both sides for a relationship to work.

Good luck to you and your wife and if the time comes and she needs support, we're here.

Hi tiger lily- I've been a longtime lurker but this is my first post.

I totally get where you're coming from. In 2012 I found out that my spouse was trans and there have been a lot of ups and downs. I've always been very supportive and open minded, but the past few months we've been in a rough patch. We  love each other so much and are best friends. We've been together for almost 15 years so there's a lot of history there. But, I miss my husband.

Sometimes I feel like I see a glimpse of "him" and that makes it difficult. When I really start to miss "him" I come read thru these forums for support.

Right now I'm realizing that I don't have anything of substance to add, but I wanted you to know that you're not alone.

Tiger Lily and other SO's, I stand in awe of your strength and your desire to try do the right thing.  It is a great testimony to your humanity and womanhood that you are trying to find a way forward despite your personal misgivings.

I divorced a few years ago because I knew that my ex would never support me.  You are doing something immesurably harder and more positive.  I salute your courage.

Julia.

To the SOs on this thread,

You have my admiration for dealing with such a difficult situation with grace and restraint.  It is most certainly a difficult time for all concerned as it is something that strikes at ones core identity.

I just wish so much that these situations could be avoided.