Thank you all for continuing to share your struggles and perspectives.  I am deeply honored that you all have responded with such honestly and never thought a thread I started would ever get this much attention.  I wish I could take everyone's pain, confusion, rejection and everything else away. Heck even if I could sacrifice myself someway to ensure the happiness of every trans person both alive today and every one in the future I would. I so strongly dislike seeing discrimination and ignorance and lack of understanding that I might even say I hate it and I try not to hate anything. There are a couple ways I know I can help. The first being continuing to help as many people as possible on here (whoever will listen), another is get into some higher position where I can have an effect on more people to help alleviate ignorance on the subject.  A third way would be to get really smart and find a way to change people's physicalities to  whatever they wanted.

I could do all three which is probably what I will do. Also I have no reason why I decided to go on this,  what is probably seen as strange, rambling.  I guess the feelings of gratitude were too high or something.

Anyway,  if anyone on here would like to share their story with me feel free to PM me. I will do whatever it takes to help in any way I can.

Be well, all of you

And with deepest love,

Samantha

Making change is slow and you probably accomplish a lot just in the way you live your life and how you talk. "Get[ting] really smart" and finding physical transition solutions would be super awesome too, though.

LC

You are an extremely generous and beautiful person.  I hope that you do find a way to fulfil your dreams

Safe travels

Aisla

Mine started out so subtly that i never really knew it was there until i was a teen. Then it took off! Whenever I was alone i would get severe depression and stomach aches. I could almost never look into a mirror and look at the male me for long. Finally it got to the point i couldn't sleep without a sleep aid and I was driving myself crazy untill I told mom and a gender health counsiler and they helped me get started!

Quote from: Lady Curiosity on July 26, 2014, 07:10:12 AM
Thank you all for continuing to share your struggles and perspectives.  I am deeply honored that you all have responded with such honestly and never thought a thread I started would ever get this much attention.  I wish I could take everyone's pain, confusion, rejection and everything else away. Heck even if I could sacrifice myself someway to ensure the happiness of every trans person both alive today and every one in the future I would. I so strongly dislike seeing discrimination and ignorance and lack of understanding that I might even say I hate it and I try not to hate anything. There are a couple ways I know I can help. The first being continuing to help as many people as possible on here (whoever will listen), another is get into some higher position where I can have an effect on more people to help alleviate ignorance on the subject.  A third way would be to get really smart and find a way to change people's physicalities to  whatever they wanted.

I could do all three which is probably what I will do. Also I have no reason why I decided to go on this,  what is probably seen as strange, rambling.  I guess the feelings of gratitude were too high or something.

Anyway,  if anyone on here would like to share their story with me feel free to PM me. I will do whatever it takes to help in any way I can.

Be well, all of you

And with deepest love,

Samantha

I'm glad your here Samantha. The world could use more people like you.

Safe travels
Allie

It's both social and internal.

I'm both angry and depressed that my body isn't what it should be. I hate my chest, my hips, my voice when it goes up high, my genitals and reproductive system, etc. I tried to accept what I have in my pants, but since T, that's gone out of the window and I feel disconnected from those parts again (except for my penis but I'm still mad that it's not a cis male penis). I have started considering bottom surgery and thinking that I could be happy with that if it turned out well, even a phalloplasty. This is somewhat surprising to me since I was set against it for awhile. I'm feeling more and more that I want all those female organs out of me. They're useless to me, anyway, since I never want to get pregnant (how horrifying!) or go off T. There's also the insecurity over it because of what I'm not able to offer to any potential sexual partners. I want to be the top, but using a strap-on seems like a cheap trade-off since I can't feel it. So I am starting to consider phalloplasty more...

Socially, I hate getting called female pronouns and being reminded in any way that I have a female body. It makes me angry. I try not to get mad at people because of it. I hide how I feel about it, but it hurts. Thankfully this will be stopping because of T! A stranger on the bus called me he yesterday and I know it's a little thing but I was so happy because of it.

So, basically, I experience dysphoria as anger, depression, disconnect, self-hatred and insecurity.

Quote from: Saint Frankenstein on August 02, 2014, 05:26:11 PM
So, basically, I experience dysphoria as anger, depression, disconnect, self-hatred and insecurity.

I have similar problems with my body to what you mentioned, but your distillation of the resulting feelings states the issue really well.