There seems to be a little discussion today around whether brutal honesty is what should be given in this thread. Well the problem is, everyone is different, which means we all have a different level at which we may be offended. We see this in society, and so some general guidelines  or social norms are followed in the real world. What I say to my friends, which is often very very honest, and sometimes brutal, I would certainly not say to a colleague at work.

So what offends one person, may not offend another. On an extreme level, this can in fact be quite detrimental to ones mental health. Many of us Come here expecting or hoping to be understood, even accepted. Many of us are not accepted in the real world. And so to come that may be the only safe place you have, and to be told something, that while inc brutally honest, is really not going to help the overall end game of what your trying to achieve, quite possibly self acceptance.

Honesty should be given, but I don't think by default it should be brutal. I was always taught if I didn't have something nice to say about someone, then best to not say anything at all.

Just my thoughts on the topic, sorry didn't mean to derail the thread so please continue peoples 

Quote from: BreezyB on October 19, 2014, 09:21:11 AM

Honesty should be given, but I don't think by default it should be brutal. I was always taught if I didn't have something nice to say about someone, then best to not say anything at all.

+1 Amen to that statement!

Thanks, everyone, for all of the comments! I kinda got sucked into RL for the weekend, but I just got caught up and I really appreciate the feedback. I absolutely appreciate the honesty, and especially the specific comments. It's good to know that I'm on the right track. I'm looking forward to starting HRT in a month or so, so I'll be checking back in later to see how you all think things are progressing!

Sorry, but homophobia was not solicited.  Queers are intolerable?  The opinions of hetrosexuals are more valid?  I am sorry, but this person has some MAJOR internalized issues to deal with. 

AND Belfast girl: If you don't mind, I can give an honest critique albiet not in a brutal way.  The biggest tell for me are your eyebrows-you really do need to shape them.  Look up eyebrow shaping online; go for a higher arch.  It would go a long way because besides those you actually have a pretty good facial structure!  As for your hairline (good shape, a bit high), I'd consider contouring makeup (again, online tutorials are AMAZING there) and also perhaps some lip liner; thin lips aren't a huge tell in my opinion, but everything helps.  That's why I use the dark lipsticks (usually not blue, not to worry!) actually-it makes my lips fuller, and helps me draws attention away from the chin.  Eyes are pretty good-just try to avoid that downward slope on the outside of the eye.  I've found that when I feel like putting in the effort, a cat eye really helps.  The only other big thing I'd look into is the chest-you usually need to be fairly busty to look good in a tunic top as is, and sadly what hormones usually give us won't be enough for that.  Bust padding helps.  A LOT.  If you'd like to start dressing in something a bit more flattering without doing too much shaping-look for v-necks, plunging necklines, things of that sort.  Skirts, dresses with a bit of fullness to create a curve also helps.  And, of course-posture!  Good posture makes everyone a bit more gorgeous.

Hope that's helpful, in a kinder way.  Hope I don't seem without authority on account of my profile pic-but honestly I know most of the tricks, it's just not practical to spend an hour doing makeup and hair every day.  I was mostly hoping for some hair tips here...anyhow.  There are more important things out there than being pretty, just keep that in mind.  Hope this helps!

Thank you! That's very helpful, seriously. Those photos were like the first or second (maybe third? I don't really remember) time ever trying anything with makeup, so I'm well aware that my makeup game needs plenty of work. Stuff like contouring is definitely something I'll look into - also eyeliner. I haven't quite got the hang of the steady hand yet, I guess, for anything more complicated that what I did there, but practice! That'll help, and I'll try cat eyes (presumably not by basing them on my cat's eyes, mind). On eyebrows - once I'm ready to go full time I'm going to do them (or get my sister to do them, she's got herself qualified as some variety of makeup artist recently, and I imagine she would very much enjoy inflicting pain on me with tweezers). It's just when I'm still going around as a guy most of the time I guess it would be pretty hard to hide shaped eyebrows. But someday, hopefully not to far away, and I'll bear in mind the high arch suggestion. I'm not particularly good with lips, and again the steadiness of the hand with lipliner is an issue, and even then lipstick seems to go very much everywhere, so. I've read that using a small brush to apply lipstick can help with that? But again, practice! There'll be plenty of that. I want to absolutely nail a good look that I can stick with and work with even just as somewhere to eventually progress from, if at all possible. I tend to buy / wear dresses and skirts that are at least a bit flippy or flared to help with shape. My measurements are okay - 34-26-34 - but my hips tend to look way too small in relation to my shoulders, so. Advice definitely noted re: what sort of tops would be more flattering. Get paid at the weekend so maybe a bit of shopping. Posture is an issue for me - I tend to slouch quite a lot compared to most people, mostly from spending many years trying to get around without people bothering me. I've been looking into good ways to help with that.

Also I am going to get my hair cut properly at some point - probably going to look to go with a fringe to help cover up a bit of brow bossing, and then have the rest just down and framing my face and I'll just straighten in. I've got that down to a relatively fine art, at least.

Anyway, thank you again! Very helpful.

putting the filter aside, what do you guys think? 

Quote from: androgynouspainter26 on October 19, 2014, 12:24:18 AM
Yup.  I mean, I was only wearing partial makeup that day (I usually just can't find time to contour) and besides-I DO know how to contour, but under different lighting you know how fake it can look.  As for the brows, they are pretty much as high as they can go.  Not much more to do there.  Sometimes I thin them out a bit more and then apply liner on the upper edges.  Usually works wonders. 

Also.  The hair?  I'd like you to do better with curls this tight.  I would like to grow it out, but that would mean letting it just friz out into a bubble on the sides.  Reading as male for a few years in the process.  Hey, if there was an easier fix, I'd take it, but since I'm not prepaired to face the embarrassment of wearing wigs in front of everyone for four years or so when my hair finally begins to obey the laws of gravity, it stays.   Who knows?  I might fix it eventually.  But I like to color, personally.  What do you recommend I do about it?  RIght now it's too short for androgynous (which I was rocking for a while) and too long for anything else.  So...not sure how to proceed.

And honestly, I'm beginning to question your taste!  Just curious-what do YOU take issue with about my lipstick?  I've actually gotten a lot of compliments on it before., of course I never wear it outside of queer circles/  Hey, asking for honest input, but...well, I like the lipstick.  The hair color too, albiet not this short.

I'll be honest--I don't see what the problem with the lipstick is! Sure, blue is unusual, but blue--for the few who wear it well--can be one of those shades that looks strange in a lovely way when done right. It's not an everyday shade, but so what? Kat Von D recently released a lipstick called Poe in her Studded Kiss line, which is a lovely deep blue; for those who can pull it off, it can be gorgeous. And while my first reaction was a moment of surprise at seeing that shade on you, I like how it looks. And as a fellow artist (writer, in my case), honestly, do you, and tell people so closed-minded as to say anyone who disagrees with their opinion is invalid to eff off. Black lipstick isn't for everyone, either, yet some people can pull it off beautifully. Hell, red lipstick doesn't work on everyone. What matters in the end is what works for you. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, but don't let opinions dictate what you do unless you agree with them.

I also don't find you look unusually masculine, androgynouspainter, going by that photo. You look more andro-female than anything, with a leaning towards female. And that isn't sugarcoating. Sure, you have an androgynous features, as your name itself indicates, but you look like you lean more towards female to me.

Quote from: Gabrielle_22 on October 20, 2014, 05:04:50 PM
I also don't find you look unusually masculine, androgynouspainter, going by that photo. You look more andro-female than anything, with a leaning towards female. And that isn't sugarcoating. Sure, you have an androgynous features, as your name itself indicates, but you look like you lean more towards female to me.

This is exactly my opinion too. And for the record, I love the extreme colors.

Quote from: Azahara on October 20, 2014, 04:28:30 PM


putting the filter aside, what do you guys think? 

I think you have wonderful features. Model-quality. Beautiful!

I'm jelly.

^i second the above

Quote from: Azahara on October 20, 2014, 04:28:30 PM


putting the filter aside, what do you guys think? 

I'll give my honest opinion:

You have quite elegant features, some feminine, some masculine, if I were assuming you were a cis girl on the street, I'd say your features were on the more masculine end - often like the cis models you see on billboards. (That doesn't mean to say you look manly, just more masculine than the average cis girl). I don't know how long you've been on hormones, but assuming you feminise more, you will become more indistinguishable. From that picture alone, you would probably pass quite a lot of the time, but some people might possibly be able to tell. Then again, it's just one picture.

Peeps, can I kindly ask all those who quoted my pics to modify their respective posts and delete those quotes? Thank You in advance, good luck and try to take things less serious and have fun here, everyone!

It gives me such relief and confidence at how beautiful everyone looks. I just hope I can have a transition as good as most of you girls

Thanks so much for the compliments and the analysis/advice!! The latter was what I was hoping for.

I'm pre-HRT...but I have my initial consult for HRT this Tuesday!!! 

Oh and yes I know..smiling...I almost always smile in pictures.  I wanted to change things up this time. 

and now that you mention it I do see the shadow-stache LOL part of that could be that I kept tweaking the brightness and contrast and color filter of the picture....oops

again thank you!

Quote from: Azahara on October 22, 2014, 05:18:21 PM
Thanks so much for the compliments and the analysis/advice!! The latter was what I was hoping for.

I'm pre-HRT...but I have my initial consult for HRT this Tuesday!!! 

Oh and yes I know..smiling...I almost always smile in pictures.  I wanted to change things up this time. 

and now that you mention it I do see the shadow-stache LOL part of that could be that I kept tweaking the brightness and contrast and color filter of the picture....oops

again thank you!

I actually really like the lack of the smile in this pic. to me it makes for a dramatic photograph with the lighting and the messy hair. but unfortunately I do see a shadow.
Since you are pre hrt you will have plenty of time to deal with that. And once you start taking hormones you will pass no problem. Also congrats on the initial consultation!

My 3am attempt at a selfie. Could I pass with some makeup and longer hair? 

Hailey, I believe you could, although your mannerisms could make or break it for you.

Quote from: Hanazono on October 24, 2014, 07:47:14 AM

put on a wig and some makeup
then we'll know

And, trim the eyebrows.

barbie~~

Quote from: speckyhailey on October 23, 2014, 04:10:42 AM
My 3am attempt at a selfie. Could I pass with some makeup and longer hair? 

I think your features are definitely soft enough; we need to see you with some more hair, and maybe after doing something about those eyebrows! :^)

Hailey, what the others have said. "Passing" has a lot to do with effort. You have a wonderful base to start with. Some make-up a nice wig and shaped eyebrows as you'll be just fine.