Quote from: Devlyn Marie on June 14, 2015, 05:58:45 PM
So I'll go all passive aggressive and ask if that means those of us who are open don't value our lives or families?

Bzzzzzz. Wrong answer.

Hugs, Devlyn

Don't visit the Caribbean, is all I can say... openly trans will get bottles thrown at you.

I guess things will come under the title depends on circumstances. I don't think trans are having a good time in Russia either especially if you like driving.

I voted "yes" because that's what I did in my early transition. Some people saw me wearing dangly earrings, nail polish, and being somewhat girly in my mannerisms, and would ask, "Pardon me...but are you...umm...changing?" or similar hesitant and apologetic questions.

Just couldn't help myself. Coy little smile, flutter eyelids, and a gentle, "Yes, I am."

Everyone was so accepting of it. Gave me warm fuzzies all the time.

 
If this thread doesn't calm down and stop taking people's comments as personal jabs at them it's going to get locked down.

Quote from: Beth Andrea on June 14, 2015, 07:52:58 PM
I voted "yes" because that's what I did in my early transition. Some people saw me wearing dangly earrings, nail polish, and being somewhat girly in my mannerisms, and would ask, "Pardon me...but are you...umm...changing?" or similar hesitant and apologetic questions.

Just couldn't help myself. Coy little smile, flutter eyelids, and a gentle, "Yes, I am."

Everyone was so accepting of it. Gave me warm fuzzies all the time.

nice story

It would certainly depend on the situation and person.

In a bar by a guy out with his dudebros?  No.  The last person who went there got the "You need to work on a better pickup line" bit.
When in a public restroom?  Hell no.
At an LGBT event?  Yes.
In line at the grocery store by another transperson? Yes.
By a random skinhead? F*** no!

Quote from: Jill F on June 14, 2015, 08:22:51 PM
It would certainly depend on the situation and person.

Truly

I voted "depends on circumstances" as I believe it is important to be aware of the situation at hand and the circumstances surrounding that situation

Before I would give any sort of answer I would ask them "why do they want to know" and "what are their motivations"?

      I voted yes because I have. I've been transitioning for almost 4 years now. About a year and a half ago I was a cashier and one of my customers was a woman in her late 20's or early 30's. In a quiet voice she asked if I was transgender. I replied in the same quiet voice: "yes I am." She then proceeded to ask how I achieved the look of having breasts. At the time I had been on female hormones about a year and a half. I simply told her: female hormones and a push up bra.


It seemed she was truly curious about me and did it a nice, easy going manner so I felt comfortable in replying to her queries. She wished me luck in the rest of my transition on her way out. Nowadays most people cannot tell the difference between me and genetic female. Some people have been able to tell but they usually keep it to themselves. I pass very well for a 32 year old transwoman who's been on hormones almost 3 years.

It depends on the situation and who asked, if it were a random stranger and depending on how I perceive the intent, then I would refuse to answer or say no then walk away.

However not quite there yet, but have been asked other awkward questions regrading sexuality before... and as above!

L Katy

Quote from: Jill F on June 14, 2015, 08:22:51 PM
It would certainly depend on the situation and person.

In a bar by a guy out with his dudebros?  No.  The last person who went there got the "You need to work on a better pickup line" bit.
When in a public restroom?  Hell no.
At an LGBT event?  Yes.
In line at the grocery store by another transperson? Yes.
By a random skinhead? F*** no!

I agree. However I would be upset if anyone, including a trans person read me and decided to call me out on it. THat said if they are looking for support I would support them anyway.

Sure. Nothing to hide. Needing to hide things makes me weak. Don't like to be weak.

For me it very much depends on circumstances.  With some people I've been open and honest about being TG because it's plain they have a genuine reason for asking.  As Jill has said there are other situations where the answer will always be 'No'.

I was just curious because where I live I've been know as male , but I've changed so much that I know people are curious. They mention how nice my nail polish is or how pretty the my dress looks , but so far no one has come out and asked if I'm trans. I'm waiting though and at this point it wouldn't bother me unless it was a group of teenagers sitting in Taco Bell.

Yes, im not going to hide who I am, even if that were possible. It's the follow up questions or comments that decide whether i remove myself from the conversation or not.

Quote from: KaylaMadison on June 15, 2015, 04:34:59 AM
Yes, im not going to hide who I am, even if that were possible.

That's another point. I don't think it hiding it is all that easy to achieve.

I am clocked all of the time. Why?

Put it this way, I don't underestimate other people's skills of perception. We are *very* finely tuned to pick another's biological sex. It is not just physical at all. It is everything about us. The smallest thing can give it away.

Furthermore, when a person is trying to hide something, others can usually read that through non-verbal communication. It is like a neon light.

So what is the point of beating myself up over being seen as trans?

Early on in my transition I would spend hours on makeup to 'pass' as much as possible (in my own mind).

It was an ordeal. I am so much better off without that tension.

As a knock-on effect - because I am now relaxed and accepting that I will be seen exactly for what I am, and I am not on guard - others are in turn relaxed around me. Again, we get what we give.

Quote from: stephaniec on June 13, 2015, 11:11:46 PM
just hypothetically  if a random stranger or a short term acquaintance just came right out and asked if you transgender would you hesitate to admit to it or not answer or just say no or just say yes. I'm not sure  because I think it would be rare for someone to just come out and ask, but I do know people that wouldn't hesitate asking. I think I'd probably say yes at this point because I'm closing in on 2 years of hormones and I'd figure what's the point of denying.

I recently met a girlfriend from my youth in the city.

She asked me outright if I was gay?

after some thought I was about to say no, not really, i'm...

And then my ex showed up (we played a lot of dressup) and I left.

Phew. Saved.
I do think i'd outright say yes if I were asked.
Honesty is key.
(Hey! I answered her question, I just didn't followup ╚(•⌂•)╝)

It's never happened yet. Sure, but with caveats. It wouldn't be pro bono, but quid pro quo. I'd have to first have answered some rather personal questions about themselves, which would be equally invasive. Something along the lines of, how often do you masturbate, or do you take it..[censored] You get what idea. 

Quote from: SarahBoo on June 15, 2015, 05:53:49 AM
That's another point. I don't think it hiding it is all that easy to achieve.

I am clocked all of the time. Why?

Put it this way, I don't underestimate other people's skills of perception. We are *very* finely tuned to pick another's biological sex. It is not just physical at all. It is everything about us. The smallest thing can give it away.

Furthermore, when a person is trying to hide something, others can usually read that through non-verbal communication. It is like a neon light.

So what is the point of beating myself up over being seen as trans?

Early on in my transition I would spend hours on makeup to 'pass' as much as possible (in my own mind).

It was an ordeal. I am so much better off without that tension.

As a knock-on effect - because I am now relaxed and accepting that I will be seen exactly for what I am, and I am not on guard - others are in turn relaxed around me. Again, we get what we give.

I like your attitude on being trans.

No, I don't really feel it's right to ask that, plus I rather be seen as normal until I give it away myself. Since I don't like lying though, I'd likely just ignore the question... and they'd take it as yes... Though I still haven't started transitioning.