Short Version

I'm Annie, I'm a MTF TG and I'm new here. Hi <3
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Long Version

I've seen this site a few times, but for some reason never looked into it more. Then, one of my tg friends (we're both mtf) linked me to this thread about the good things about being tg, and it felt good to read. I've thought many of these things but never quite put them out in words like that. I understand myself pretty well, but I know there's a lot more to learn. I'm still young, I'm only 22, and I feel so happy that I have friends that I could talk to about being tg. I wanted to call it a condition, or a problem, but that brings a negative connotation which I feel is inappropriate, and I'm sure you all agree. However, it's not without it's share of problems... and it's taken me a while to understand a few things about myself.

I've been like this as long as I can remember, since I was 12, it was a very traumatic point in my life for several reasons which I can go into more detail if you're all interested, but I've always felt like I was outside of society, looking in. I was never really a part of it, though sometimes I can play the role well, I never felt right. The thread I linked to earlier covers it pretty well, and I've always felt like that. "Why do guys do that? Why can't they understand how girls think?" "Why do girls act like that? Don't they know how the guys will react?" Being a foreigner to society and both genders gave me a very distinct view of things. It let me help people in ways I don't think many people can. I can help guys pick gifts for girls, and girls gifts for guys, when relationships are in a rough patch I can think of lots of possibilities and argue any situation for or against each person involved.

However, all these benefits were not without it's detriments. It was difficult, emotionally as a child, and all these things happened all at once and I didn't understand emotions and it scared me. They were painful and I didn't understand how people got into horrible situations over them (bad relationships which may end in divorce, lust, greed, all overpowering common sense). So eventually, I just shut them off. This has given me even deeper insight in how people work, and how emotions work (on a logical level), but it's made me numb. It's kind of a trade off, and I wish I didn't have to be like this but it's how I am now, and I've been trying to fix it.

I need to be able to forgive myself for being human, and that emotions are ok. I'm very loving, forgiving, and trusting of others, but when it comes to myself, I'm a harsh critic. Usually, this only happens with things that matter to me like having things set to my high standards (but if other people don't meet it, I don't mind). Anyways, I'm ranting, I also want to learn a lot about myself, and tg. I know a little, but there's a lot more I want to learn. I want to be able to trust myself and love myself.

Relationships have always been interesting. With people I find I've taken a liking to, or even potentially, I make sure to tell them about being tg, and about my life, how I got from where I was to where I am. Mostly it's because part of me is reaching out for acceptance, and also that I want to know from the start, that they understand and accept me for all these things. Having said that, I don't share EVERYTHING, but definitely a lot. I posted a lot, wow. I hope to make this a forum that I will constantly visit because it's a very important thing to me, and I'm sure it is to you all too. I want this place to be a natural place to visit, and I want to feel comfortable here. <3

Also, I usually use a lot of emotes and symbols, faces and such, and that's after I get comfortable enough with people and the place to do those things. If that kind of thing is ok, let me know :3

  Welcome 

You find most of us great people  and a few who might be considered naughty  > ( but then some people like that too )

There are definitely some  marshals  to keep the peace and a few who are experiencing the crap life can shove at  them  or feel the brick wall they are continually hitting 

Anyway welcome   

Daisy

Hello Annie and welcome to Susan's!

Thank you for your introduction.  Please take a few moments to get familiar with all the boards of the site, review the site rules before posting, and take advantage of our many resources such as the wiki, chat, and the links listed at the main page.  We look forward to your future posts and participation.  Enjoy your stay

tink

^_^ thanks~ you all seem so nice, and I can't wait until this place is my home away from home. *hugs* <3

Hi, Annie,

Welcome to what I would call a pretty nice place.  I hope that you grow and enjoy as you share and learn.

Wing Walker

Hi, Annie,

Nice to hear your introduction.

Just my own monolog for today. Dialogue with people surrounding you is very important, because most people do not know much about TG. In my country, even most journalists do not tell TG from gays. I once tried to educate people around me, and some worked anyway. Whatever I talk, however, some people just are not willing to accept what I say and who I am.

Nowadays, I do not try to persuade all of them, and I can not. I just act without getting permission or agreement from them. I do not need it.

And, TG is not an important issue for me to live together with people. As long as I work and sustain my family, nobody can interfere with my own life. Even my parents accept me as TG, although there were difficult times.

Fortunately I have a few friends and seniors who always support me, even though they do not understand what TG is. These people helped me in critical moments that were caused by my ->-bleeped-<- and crossdressing. For these people, I frankly talk and demonstrate who I am. In some cases, action is more effective than talking. For example, wearing high-heels just once was more persuasive than an 2-hour talk.

Keep a balance between action and talk.

Take care,

Barbie~~

Welcome to Susan's.

There's a lot of great information here.

Enjoy.