Quote from: HarryWest on November 02, 2015, 09:29:18 AM
So excited for tomorrow. Well today considering what time it is right now.

Race day, track side was uber fantastic, Jess totally rocked a sequin and lace cocktail dress.

It was kinda magical, didn't win anything as we played the favourites.

So cool that a female jockey rode the win.

Quote from: HarryWest on November 04, 2015, 03:51:54 AM
Race day, track side was uber fantastic, Jess totally rocked a sequin and lace cocktail dress.

It was kinda magical, didn't win anything as we played the favourites.

So cool that a female jockey rode the win.

We have just returned spent a few extra days because we enjoyed it so much.

Visited the markets and a few boutique stores.

Came home with an extra suitcase or two.

How was everyone else's race day?

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Thought I'd give an update.

Things have been a bit hit and miss of late, Christmas was quite a stresser.

Our families met for the first time and things were not very warm between all parties involved.

Happy New Year to you two too!

We can appreciate that families of all kinds may find the holidays a mixed bag of fun and stress. 

Guess we won't light up everyones tree and one reason I so appreciate my "intentional family."

Thanks for the update

Not sure if my fam knows the person they think is my boyfriend is actually my girlfriend, but they won't be happy when they find out officially.  Stick to your guns though, and back your lady up.

It's a work in progress. As is life in general.

Today has not been the best, a FTM friend of Jess's had the front of their house tagged with "QUEER". We have taken him in for now but I'm not too sure how you are supposed to go about things in this situation.

The kicker is, he is Jess's Ex.

Oh that might feel a bit awkward but then you already handle non traditional better than most

The world does contain haters and your generosity is hopefully answered with respect and a situation you all feel trust and safe about.

You two sound like a lovely couple and lovely people.  Though it slightly worries me that maybe Jess doesn't take you quite seriously enough when you say that sex hurts you and maybe she should be less forceful.  Or maybe I'm reading it wrong.  It might be good to try to explain it more I guess.  I'm sorry that you had trouble with your neighbours, they are so out of line, and I hope it's better now. 

After reading the whole thread up to now I must tell you that I hope the two of you are able to stay together.  The two of you sound like such a sweet couple.  Such behavior from people is abhorrent.  As for the sex issues hang in there.  Training plugs help, but the problem is they are static and don't really prepare you for the thrusting.  She may be trying to be gentle and is not as forceful as you think.  The feelings tend to rather amplified for the receiver.  Best of luck to the two of you.

Quote from: Tessa James on February 16, 2016, 05:00:16 PM
Oh that might feel a bit awkward but then you already handle non traditional better than most

The world does contain haters and your generosity is hopefully answered with respect and a situation you all feel trust and safe about.

Yeah, but I am still really uncomfortable with it. I said so to Jess but she gave me the "it will only be for a few days" speech.

Well it has been a full month and he is still with us.

Has been making things a bit tense but Jess just cannot outright tell him to move on and I myself just cannot bring myself to put my foot down considering we had trouble with our neighbours and community too.

He has been very "clingy" to both me and especially Jess, and while he pulls his weight with money and chores etc. he is kinda impinging on our lifestyle.

Harry its cool that you are helping someone out.  Helping and becoming dependent are a too common mix and you know the cure is some straight talk, pun intended.  It is challenging to not have some hurt feelings but perhaps better to not wait until you are all feeling angry and hurt?

You have demonstrated care and concern and wanting your space really is OK too.

Quote from: Tessa James on March 22, 2016, 12:26:43 PM
Harry its cool that you are helping someone out.  Helping and becoming dependent are a too common mix and you know the cure is some straight talk, pun intended.  It is challenging to not have some hurt feelings but perhaps better to not wait until you are all feeling angry and hurt?

You have demonstrated care and concern and wanting your space really is OK too.

We had a quite chat and he moved out. Our personal love life has resumed and after such a stretch without it, it was quite a stretch to receive it once more.

Well things are basically back to normal. Sorta.

As I hinted in my last post with our house guest around we stopped having sex.

Now it feels like I'm back to square one again. Even before, it was an uncomfortable painful feeling which had enjoyable end results for both of us. Now it is just painful again.

Jess is quite bigger than myself and she says she gets off on the tightness. But I'm really struggling at times and while I've talked it over time and time again, and said "stop". I just cannot get Jess to understand how I feel when she keeps on saying she has no issues with size.

I love her and I want sex to be part of our relationship but... I just don't know.

Advice?

Quote from: HarryWest on April 07, 2016, 05:03:25 PM
Well things are basically back to normal. Sorta.

As I hinted in my last post with our house guest around we stopped having sex.

Now it feels like I'm back to square one again. Even before, it was an uncomfortable painful feeling which had enjoyable end results for both of us. Now it is just painful again.

Jess is quite bigger than myself and she says she gets off on the tightness. But I'm really struggling at times and while I've talked it over time and time again, and said "stop". I just cannot get Jess to understand how I feel when she keeps on saying she has no issues with size.

I love her and I want sex to be part of our relationship but... I just don't know.

Advice?

Have you tried the anal play trainer plugs? They gradually go up in size to help the muscle stretch without pain. Just a thought.

Quote from: PrincessButtercup on April 07, 2016, 10:54:36 PM
Have you tried the anal play trainer plugs? They gradually go up in size to help the muscle stretch without pain. Just a thought.

Indeed I have several and we are using them regularly. I also have dildos and even a hallow strap-on in Jess's approximate size too. I still have trouble thought?

I'm at a loss as that's what most of my friends with larger partners have done.

One thing you can do is breath out as they penetrate, that tends to cause you to relax. And use lots of quality lube. Other than that, just remind them that you giving your body to them is a gift that should be cherished and not abused. Sex that hurts in a nonconsenual way isn't fun for either partner, or at least shouldn't be. If they're getting any pleasure from intentionally hurting you then that's an entirely different topic that moves from physical to psychological.

Quote from: PrincessButtercup on April 08, 2016, 10:17:47 AM

Other than that, just remind them that you giving your body to them is a gift that should be cherished and not abused. Sex that hurts in a nonconsenual way isn't fun for either partner, or at least shouldn't be. If they're getting any pleasure from intentionally hurting you then that's an entirely different topic that moves from physical to psychological.

An important principle and consideration for any lovers, thank you!

Quote from: PrincessButtercup on April 08, 2016, 10:17:47 AM
I'm at a loss as that's what most of my friends with larger partners have done.

One thing you can do is breath out as they penetrate, that tends to cause you to relax. And use lots of quality lube. Other than that, just remind them that you giving your body to them is a gift that should be cherished and not abused. Sex that hurts in a nonconsenual way isn't fun for either partner, or at least shouldn't be. If they're getting any pleasure from intentionally hurting you then that's an entirely different topic that moves from physical to psychological.

No, I'm quite sure she doesn't get pleasure from inflicting pain on me as she is quite concerned when I let her know of my discomfort. She just enjoys the tight feeling.

However this is an issue I've had from day one and we've talked it over hundreds of times. I'm just unsure if she can see my point of view.

Her size hurts but I still get pleasure from it in the end. I think to her that means all is good.

I'm still unsure.