Sooo... how to even begin. Eep.

I've been lurking here for I guess a couple weeks now. I stumbled across it while looking for informed consent clinics on Google. I was doing that because I recently came out to myself. I'm 31, and have been suppressing a pull toward femininity for a long time. Most of my life, I guess, actually. When I was a kid, I remember playing Power Rangers with my friends, and coming up with reasons for whatever character I was playing to end up body swapped with the Pink Ranger by whatever pretend villain we were fighting. That's the earliest thing I can think of. There's been lots since, but as I got older, and anything that read as femininity was ridiculed by other boys, I kind of just retreated and stuffed it deep down.

I don't know what or why it finally all clicked for me, but my brain has been racing at 100mph ever since, concerned with all the potential fallout of eventually coming out. I just moved in with my girlfriend in September, and while she's incredible, and pansexual, I don't know how she will react to this. I think most of my family will be accepting, but some of them aren't the most progressive thinking.

I don't know. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little scared. I've decided not to say anything to anyone until the new year, because I don't want to potentially destroy the holidays.

I also don't want to take any formal steps toward transitioning until I tell my girlfriend. It would feel like lying.

I'm really not sure what the point of this post is, if I'm being honest. I just felt like I needed to chime in and introduce myself and kind of just declare "I am Ashley."

I've included a picture. I'm, as mentioned, pre-everything. I'm not wearing any makeup except lipstick, and I'm wearing one of my girlfriend's wigs. The eyeliner was added in a photo manipulation app on my phone haha.

I didn't see an option for attaching the photo directly, and I'm afraid to upload anything online where it's public, so I used a Dropbox link. I hope that's not sketchy.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/nyp8uw55120g1qo/IMG_4820.PNG?dl=0

Ashley, looking good for "nothing" done.  I see great potential.

Good luck and telling your girlfriend is a good idea.  If you have any awesome friend/sibling you might want to practice first with what you are going to say.  My sister thought I was coming out gay.  Well I gets she was right, but not really how she was thinking.
-Dee Dee

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    Ashley, welcome to the clan. I'm new too, but I can assure you there are so many lovely ladies here, you'll never feel short of advice.
     You look so beautiful, you'll make a lovely girl.

      You'll get your welcome from the moderators soon. Feel free to ask anything to anyone here. Everyone is really so helpful here.

Welcome to the forum Ashley, the resources here are endless, and you do seem to have a good potential.
Its about being happy, talking about it will relieve tremendous stress and tensions in your life, if you have them.
I wish you all the best as you begin this journey. Hugs Christine

Thank you so much for the warm welcome. As nervous as this all makes me, I'm excited to have stumbled across what seems like such a supportive community.

I know I've already learned a lot during my time lurking. Hoping to learn even more now that I'm taking part!

Hi Ashley 

Welcome to Susan's Place    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

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Hugs

V M

Hi Ashley and welcome to Susan's.

Thank you, Genee! This place is a treasure trove of information.

Been soaking up tons of posts with information I didn't even know I needed.

:3 hallo

Hi everyone!  I'm Ashley's girlfriend. She didn't come out to me so much as I kind of...found out, but I'm so proud of my brave, kind hearted, smart, talented, wonderful girlfriend for finding her true self. I'm a cisgender woman, but I want to learn as much as I can here so I can support the love of my life during what may be a very difficult, but rewarding, road for her.

Hello Ashley

It is a pleasure to meet you.  As life goes it does tend to be full of surprises and you seem to be handling them well.



And to you Selenakle, nice to meet you as well. Even if you might be a cat woman, I applaud you for following your heart.

I how you two keep flying.


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Welcome to Susan's Place Selenakyle. Yes we have hear that your investigative skills rival Sherlock Holmes however in this case, I am pretty sure that all is forgiven. We have so many cases on the site where the outcome isn't as good and we need to help them with more than being transgender. Feel free to post anywhere you are comfortable and if there is anything I can help you with, let me know.

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Hello Selenakyle. Ashley is a lucky girl because she has you.
    Just be with her. She is the person you love, nevermind her gender.

Love,
Saira.

Quote from: Saira128 on December 17, 2016, 12:11:03 AM
Hello Selenakyle. Ashley is a lucky girl because she has you.
    Just be with her. She is the person you love, nevermind her gender.

Love,
Saira.

Thanks Saira!
Luckily, gender has never been a factor in attraction for me. I know she'll be gorgeous as a lady, and I've had a few friends and family that have gone through transitions so I know what to expect and I know she'll still be the same. She's always been Ashley, she's just been trapped in the wrong form for most of her life.