Quote from: ChristineRachel on March 31, 2017, 11:57:36 AM
Hey all, just wanted to get this off my chest.
I have been really struggling with the loneliness that I feel since coming out to my parents. I haven't spoken to dad in months and my mom has gotten so cold and harsh.
She never replies to half of what I say to her anymore, we wher super close, I called home every night.
And my uncle here managed to get me to go see some religious councilor friend of his in a Church next Thursday :/
Mum has been holding on to the hope that I will be "converted",.

Will things ever be normal again?
Makes me wonder about coming out atall, loosing all my friends. Not that I have too many but still.
It so sad how they can't understand how much of myself I sacrificed for ther happiness

I don't understand how can parents act like this [emoji22] . I came out to my parents, and at first, I thought their reaction was good. But now, they are trying everything possible to "Cure" me. They want me to just forget everything, and keep on studying medicine. I don't know how I'll just become a normal guy, and stop being transgender. I'll kill myself, if they force me to live as a guy.
     My friends too, I have lost so many of them, they no more call, they don't even smile when they see me.
    But I have also made so many new friends here, I don't worry much about that.
    You are not alone. We all are there for ya.
       

So.. how was seeing the Church dude for counselling? Hopefully better then what I assume ?

Hey Mars, yea I left a comment about that on the last page of this thread. Check it out.
It was a big surprise that's for sure.
I left ther feeling good about myself, and perhaps even better about myself.
But this guy was really someone to help people who really really need help.
The biggest problem I have is my parents. And that is them that need to talk to someone like the guy I did. Or standard issue councilor

Quote from: ChristineRachel on April 06, 2017, 11:36:57 PM
Hey all.

So I went to this guy yesterday afternoon. The Religious councilor.
Spent like hours in there, it was actually really good. He was kind and listened non judgementally.
I was surprised really.
Just talked about my life and how I feel and why I think I feel this way, and what he thinks can happen.
It's funny as a trans person who has been down all the mental roads and ways of thinking, ther was nothing really he threw at me that caught me off guard.
I've been there done that mentally already.
I told him how I see things very simply now, I have stopped worrying about what it means to be trans, or why I am trans, or trying not to be trans. Things do still get me down from time to time, but not because of me being trans, its others around me that bring me down.
I must learn to get passed that, and for certain of these people simply give them time!
I was very surprised by this whole experience in many ways so far.
Mostly good surprises, my life feels right since begining it all, and I am so greatful I could do this.
I am also so grateful that yesterday went so well and he didn't justs sass me all the way to the inferno lol
Anyway thats it for now.
Thank you girls and guys for all your help too, you are wee stars <33

That's awesome! I've been wondering how your meeting went, glad it worked out!

Glad it went well 

Thanks, Markie it was a real surprise.
I was happy with that

Even better, it sounds like you are happy being ChristineRachel.

That's all we can really ask of life. Self-acceptance and our happiness are something we all deserve.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I am happy being me that's for sure.
And yes happiness is for all of us :3
I hope we can all feel true happiness and love sometime.
Thanks Michelle

Wish I reinstalled Tapatalk sooner. Sorry I missed your post but you're never alone hon.

Glad things went ok with the counsellor and your family situ defo sucks.

fwiw catch me anytime on WhatsApp.

The only thing I can suggest is what you can't do yet and that's be only you.

Whenever they see him they consider it proof that is who you were, are and can be.

Until you bury their son I fear they may never see their daughter.

Don't worry Jerrica, I go through these ups and down regularly.
It's typically gona happen when you are living the half like.
A good boot to the arse and I will be dandy again.
I hate when I go down this tunnel :/

Hi Christine Rachel

I agree about how lonely transition can be and am sorry that you are going through a difficult time.  I am also estranged from my family due to transition and am Irish too.  I live in Bavaria.  I don't know whether there there is a PM function on this forum as I have just moved from lurker to poster, but if you want to be friends, send me a message of some sort.

Yours in solitude.

Tara

What can I say Christine worrying is my thing and hanging out online with you for the past yearish gets you on my worry list like the rest of my family

Yeah defo get the thought/mood loops but mine are kinda silly by comparison tbh.

You deserve better hon but luckily you're way stronger than me. I'd never have been strong enough to do the double life thing. Genuinely blows my mind to think about it.

I hope your family come around soon for their benefit more than yours. If they "decide" they don't love you then as cold as it may sound you will be better off without them. Just remember that you are not the problem.

My kids had a great way of approaching it through Pokémon their Dad evolved into Mum2. Like the Pokémon once you evolve that's it there's no going back

If only grown ups were as clever...

Quote from: tarabel on April 15, 2017, 12:57:06 PM
Hi Christine Rachel

I agree about how lonely transition can be and am sorry that you are going through a difficult time.  I am also estranged from my family due to transition and am Irish too.  I live in Bavaria.  I don't know whether there there is a PM function on this forum as I have just moved from lurker to poster, but if you want to be friends, send me a message of some sort.

Yours in solitude.

Tara

Welcome to Susan's Place. There is a PM function on the site as well as a number of other features that will unlock after 15 quality posts. The following links will explain this to you as well as other information you might want to know about using the forum.

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Thanks Jerrica. It helps to here you got my back too :')
I just hope things work out. I will have to let them go for the benefit of my own head if they don't want to see me how I feel I am.
Hopefully it won't come to that.
The kids always see it so simply.
It's the adults that over complicate everything.

If it wasn't for this forum not sure what I would do, mind you its this forum that's got me where I am now!!! Every body needs some one to unload/chat to and in our situation that's a lot of unloading

Quote from: ChristineRachel on April 15, 2017, 04:23:56 PM
Thanks Jerrica. It helps to here you got my back too :')
I just hope things work out. I will have to let them go for the benefit of my own head if they don't want to see me how I feel I am.
Hopefully it won't come to that.
The kids always see it so simply.
It's the adults that over complicate everything.

Hi Christine Rachel

Kids are so brutally honest and terrify me when I am out in public...the little buggers can clock you from 6 blocks away , but they accept so easily, the good thing is they are more likely to be concerned that you will still read them their stories or take them to the park than if you are wearing a dress or pants.

Liz

Yep Davina you are right.
This forum means alot to me too.
I am a very shy type person and don't talk to much or have a big friends group.
This place became my place to get things off of my mind, and I do see you guys as friends too lol even if we don't always speak, I read posts all the time, sometimes I don't reply, as sometimes I shy away from it.
But I love this place. Little safe haven.

Hey Elizabeth, as I am not out yet I have not spent anytime infront of em thank god, but I am sure when they realise they probably just blurt it out real obvious like. Hopefully parents being cool they would just explain nicely to them.
Kids aren't gona be hateful because of it, even blurring it out is not done in badness, just silly cause they don't know.
Badness against us would simply be things the older generations teach them :/
Not even ther fault

I expect you'll be an easy read for kids tbh. They'll read you as female a mile away

Still smile about early on in transition (probably 8 months ago) overhearing a small group of kids talking about me in one of the nurseries I work at. One kid wondered if I was a boy or a girl and the other kids quickly set him straight with "She's a girl" while giggling at his mistake. The boy agreed and smiled then their playing continued. So sweet.

Another did make me cringe though in another nursery who remembered who I was (about a year ago). The other kids weren't convinced but the poor wee lamb was adamant. Fortunately I've been back since and he only sees me now.

Kids can be your best early validation or your worst nightmare lol

After that it's getting hit on and beyond which again I don't see any problems for you. Most people for better or worse are hung up on aesthetics to the extent that if you look good enough so much more can be overlooked.

I've not gone any further than being hit on and chatted up a bit due to being married but it sure does make you feel good. Major confidence boost until you're alone again as your own worst enemy.

Watching Mean Girls (again) reminds me that even the plastics were never happy with their bodies.

Anyhoo I digress again for a wee change.

Back OT

You're awesome hon and anyone that can't see it is missing out x

I think your biggest  problem  will be people. Stareing not because  your being read but because  they will be thinking wow look at this  statuesque woman

The definition of statuesque is someone, especially a woman, who is tall and dignified. A tall, beautiful woman known for her poise and grace is an example of someone who would be described as statuesque.

Thanks Markie, I hope that's what happens :')
Only problem is even if that is the case I will probably still be paranoid thinking people are clocking me.