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dysphoria

Started by Jazmynne, May 04, 2017, 06:34:33 AM

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Jazmynne

hi all I just need to talk about dysphoria. I didn't think I ever had any till last night. the voice wouldn't leave my alone. I awoke at 2 am no sleep since. I now know what it is to have it. started to cry but got that stopped, have asked for help from above but no message that I can tell. my thoughts used to be about being a woman last night it was I should be a woman omg. some times my mind keeps telling me to get estrogen. if I questioned about being transgender after last night I know for sure now I am. I have felt like not going to work but going to a quiet place to be alone with this. I am not out to my wife yet but I know now  this is coming to a conclusion what ever the results will be I cant bear this secret much longer. I know now being a woman is not about having breasts or dressing feminine its what is inside and in your soul. iam as I am I just cant help it. thanks for listening  sorry my thoughts are all over the place its bad for me today.P             
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KathyLauren

Now would be a good time to talk to a gender therapist.  You will need to explore your dysphoria and map out a plan to deal with it in a way that will work for you.
2015-07-04 Awakening; 2015-11-15 Out to self; 2016-06-22 Out to wife; 2016-10-27 First time presenting in public; 2017-01-20 Started HRT!!; 2017-04-20 Out publicly; 2017-07-10 Legal name change; 2019-02-15 Approval for GRS; 2019-08-02 Official gender change; 2020-03-11 GRS; 2020-09-17 New birth certificate
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LizK

Quote from: Jazmynne on May 04, 2017, 06:34:33 AM
hi all I just need to talk about dysphoria. I didn't think I ever had any till last night. the voice wouldn't leave my alone. I awoke at 2 am no sleep since. I now know what it is to have it. started to cry but got that stopped, have asked for help from above but no message that I can tell. my thoughts used to be about being a woman last night it was I should be a woman omg. some times my mind keeps telling me to get estrogen. if I questioned about being transgender after last night I know for sure now I am. I have felt like not going to work but going to a quiet place to be alone with this. I am not out to my wife yet but I know now  this is coming to a conclusion what ever the results will be I cant bear this secret much longer. I know now being a woman is not about having breasts or dressing feminine its what is inside and in your soul. iam as I am I just cant help it. thanks for listening  sorry my thoughts are all over the place its bad for me today.P             

Hi Jasmine

Great you are feeling so positive about your new knowledge of yourself. This must be something you have struggled with for a very long time. Coming to terms with just being Trans can be hard enough then trying to work out what flavour you are if any one particular flavour at all.

Its a happy scary confusing time. Give yourself some time to process this. I think the suggestion made by KathyLauren is a good one. If you can't find a gender therapist even a trans knowledgeable one will be of significant value. Depending on where you are in the world will depend on how good those resources to help you are.

We are here to help if we can  :D



Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016,
Fulltime from 8 March 2017,
GCS 4 December 2018
Voice Surgery 01 February 2019
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Jazmynne

thank you ladies for listening, I have taken your advice and been in touch with the transition channel by email so maybe a start there. so much to think about but feeling better this evening . what set last night off I don't know. thanks.   
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Dena

The walls that kept all of this caged up have just come down and there will be no putting them back up again. The feelings will continue but you are experiencing the worst of it right now. In a few weeks to a couple of months you will be able to function better but it will be a long journey. I wish you the best of luck and let me know if I can help you with  anything.
Rebirth Date 1982 - PMs are welcome - Use [email]dena@susans.org[/email] or Discord if your unable to PM - Skype is available - My Transition
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