Hi Everyone Assuming some stranger comes up and asks me those questions. I would answer them in the following way.
1. Oh, you are so handsome (or for ftms, I guess they might say that you are so pretty), why in the world would you do this?" "You are good looking, you would be silly trying to be a woman, and besides, it makes no sense."A. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and there are a lot more people who are more pretty than me. I want to do this because I want to. No, I not good looking, I'm beautiful. How would you know I would look silly? No it does not make sense to you, but it does to me.
2. "Have you been under a lot of stress? Have you sought counseling to deal with this mental problem of wanting to be the other sex? Do you have multiple personalities?"A. No I have never been under stress, what makes you say that? Do you know something I don't? No I never sought counselling, except when I had to go to get my surgery letters. Once I got those I have never seen another 'therapist ever again. Not that I'm aware of, I only talk to me, myself and I. However, some days I'm happy and some days I'm not, but then again I'm sure you are happy and sad sometimes.
3. "You might be gay and this is a way for you to think that you are straight after all."A. No I'm not gay, never have been and never will be. One moment, let me ask myself again. "Am I gay Sarah?" No, you are not Sarah. You definitely go that right, I was straight as die, before and after surgery.
4. "Perhaps you can simply be a more feminine man (or I suppose, for ftms, they might say that you can be a 'tomboy'), after all, it is freaky for anyone to be the sex other than the one you were born."A. I was never a man in the first place, I'm not freaky, just another human, going about their daily life. Have you ever tried being the other sex than you was born with?
5. "Why do you want to do this? Do you think you are a woman? When did these thoughts begin?"A. Because I want to. Better still what is the answer to life the universe and everything? When you know the answer to this question then you will know why I want to do this. I was very young when I first had the thoughts of wanting to be a girl.
6. "Maybe you just want to wear women's clothes. Is this a fetish?"A. I wear womens's clothes because I'm a female. Who wants to wear grey clothes, flannel shirts and ripped, saggy jeans all the time? Boring if you ask me. Not that I know of, females wearing female clothes is not a fetish the last time I heard.
7. "Hey, society is just down on males now. It is like it is bad to be a guy. Just try to be a decent man, ignore all that silliness. We need both men and women, there is nothing wrong with being a man. Just be a good man."A. So what if society is down on males, its societies problem to resolve. I'm sure they will sort it out sometime. There isn't anything wrong with being a man or women so deal with it.
8. "You will get beat up at some point if you transition. There are going to be some people that will taunt you and try to make your life miserable." A. No I was never beaten up or taunted, nobody knew I was changing my life around. If somebody beats you up, in todays society, it means jail time.
9. "You will not be able to get a good job. You will have no employment history. It is like your past did not exist. Besides, who wants a guy to show up at work dressed as a woman? It would be easier to get a job if you are simply gay. Maybe you are gay and are in denial."A. I was working the day I changed my life around virtually, have you ever heard of the black swan theory? I guess not as there are exceptions to some rules. I had employment history, but I was vetted by an employment agency and the employer just hired me under contract. I don't know who would not like to see any men come to work in a dress, do you know who they are?
10. "How are you ever going to sound like a woman, did you ever think about that?"A. I have a list of females as long as my arm in 6pt that have deeper voices than mine, so what's your problem?
11. "Are you going to get your thing cut off too?"A. No, I'm turning my outie into an innie.
12. "What have you been smoking?"A. Nothing, I don't smoke. You must be smoking something as you are asking such rude and dumb questions.
13. "Were you abused as child, is that why you are thinking this way?"A. No, I was never abused. Disciplined, yes.
14. "This is simply unnatural. You can't fool Mother Nature."A. Who said it's unnatural? Who is mother nature or father nature as a matter of fact? They are not going to dictate to me what I can or can not do.
15. "As you age, you will look sillier."A. So you say, it really depends on ones mental faculties and the rate you are asking these questions you certainly are looking sillier as time passes.
16. "Life will not be the same for you. Can you handle that?"A. Of course it's going to be different and I'm looking forward to it changing.
17. "No one would marry you unless they are equally confused. Maybe if they are gay or perverts. Few would even want to date you." A. I would never want to marry a confused, gay or pervert person. How about you?
18. "What you want to do is wrong."A. I don't care whether you think it is right or wrong, did I say I don't care?
19. "This is just a phase probably. Give this some time. Sit on these thoughts. Maybe these thoughts will go away."A. Just a phase? Thats funny its been 35 years and counting, it must be one of the longest phases of my life, so I guess you must realise that I have given it some thought. Nothing has changed in all that time.
20. "This impacts more people in your life than just you. You are being incredibly selfish if you go through with this. If you are married, I doubt your wife would stay with you. Your friends, customers, and relatives will disown you. Maybe a few would be accepting. You will give up a lot."A. Who does it impact exactly? How can I be selfish if I did something for myself. I have no wife so thats not a problem for me. If others have a problem with what I have done then that's their problem not mine.
21. Are you going to move away and start a new life? You might have to."A. I actually did move away from friends and family. I did not want the reprucussions of what I was doing to be reflected upon them. In doing so, I achieved more than I ever thought possible. Luckly for me my family found out and they accepted me.
22. "I love you, but this is a terrible idea. (for some of these reasons noted above.)"A. I love you too, not! That's your opinion and I don't care if you think it's a terrible idea. For me it was the best thing, idea that I have ever had.
Talk about putting people in their right place.
Love and Hugs
Sarah B
Official Greeter
