To all the parts reading this:

Thank you all so much for sharing your stories so openly, for being here and for all the effort you put into caring for each other.

That kind of inner support and collaboration is powerful and inspiring.

With warmth,

~ Lilis 💗

Quote from: Adrian26 on May 10, 2025, 03:17:46 PMWell thanks, Adrian was worried y'all wouldn't necessarily like us

Anyone who puts a post like that clearly has to be worth knowing!

Quote from: Adrian26 on May 11, 2025, 09:27:57 AMI think he's the most handsome man ever and I tell him that constantly, but he just doesn't believe it. How do I support him during his transition?

Maybe the best way is by helping him to believe in himself? Boosting his self confidence will do more than anything to keep him good.

Quote from: Amanda500 on May 11, 2025, 06:22:41 PMHi Adrian and Dominic! We are also a system. I am Amanda. On this publicly viewable site, we call our host Maleme instead of our male birth name that he uses. We also have a little who calls herself Sheila. We hope to meet the others of you soon.

We have not been as active here for a while as we were dealing more with the trauma and DID and less with our transness. Over the past 10 years, we have been sorting in therapy out how much is trauma and how much is gender that we would have if the trauma did not happen.

Managing dysphoria and the different gender-related needs between us is indeed a challenge which falls mostly on me as the one who handles emotional things for the system and is the mediator between the others. This is particularly hard on Maleme who took a long time to accept our transness. He hoped so much that everything was a trauma response like wanting a different body because we would have not to feel the pain and other things that could be cured with therapy.

As Sheila finally felt safe enough around Maleme, she started talking about herself and told us her name which really surprised Maleme. Hearing how she tried to tell our parents we are a girl around 4 or 5 and was so scared by their reaction that she hid away hit Maleme in the gut. We knew Sheila carried most of the shame and the most traumatic memories, but did not realized how much more dysphoric she is than me-Amanda.

One of the key ways we handle all of this is making time for each of us to be onstage (our image for fronting). We usually have some time to wear dresses or skirts and blouses most days which requires negotiating with our wife who is tolerant, but not accepting. Sheila takes care of our cat and we make time for knitting and other crafting for her.

Having to go back into the office most workdays has been rough. We are out to our immediate boss who has a trans daughter, but not to others there. We make time where Maleme can give up being downstage for short breaks. Sheila in particular needs this as seeing women wearing things Sheila and I would like to wear makes here extremely jealous. She needs a minute to self-talk about how much she wants to be in a dress and be in a female body.

But, above all, we need to be gracious towards each other which has been difficult for Maleme.

Y'all are strong. Being a system and having internal problems and being trans is hard. Y'all will figure it out. Tell Maleme they're strong and it'll get better. Tell Sheila bring quiet is harder than speaking up. There's people who care here, us included

Quote from: Lilis on May 12, 2025, 02:46:24 AMTo all the parts reading this:

Thank you all so much for sharing your stories so openly, for being here and for all the effort you put into caring for each other.

That kind of inner support and collaboration is powerful and inspiring.

With warmth,

~ Lilis 💗

Thanks! We're figuring it out, but it's easier with all of us

Quote from: TanyaG on May 12, 2025, 03:34:18 AMAnyone who puts a post like that clearly has to be worth knowing!

Well thanks

Quote from: TanyaG on May 12, 2025, 03:38:02 AMMaybe the best way is by helping him to believe in himself? Boosting his self confidence will do more than anything to keep him good.

I'm trying, but I know it's gonna take time

Quote from: Adrian26 on May 12, 2025, 07:01:54 AMI'm trying, but I know it's gonna take time

Hang in there Adrian.  You got this.

Quote from: Annaliese on May 12, 2025, 08:49:02 AMHang in there Adrian.  You got this.

I'm Dominic, but thanks!!

Hi Dominic,

I have no experience with DID, but I do understand the complexity of your lives. Something that might help all of you is our Significant Others Talk Forum. This is a place for spouses, family members, partners, and allies to share their experiences in helping and supporting their transgender partners.

Perhaps reading some of their stories will give you insight into what worked for them and what didn't. Many of the stories are by spouses who have had their partner transition during their relationship. That might help each of you understand the dynamics of what you are experiencing, and thus can help and support the others.

We wish you all the best. Thank you for sharing with us.

Quote from: Lori Dee on May 12, 2025, 09:11:28 AMHi Dominic,

I have no experience with DID, but I do understand the complexity of your lives. Something that might help all of you is our Significant Others Talk Forum. This is a place for spouses, family members, partners, and allies to share their experiences in helping and supporting their transgender partners.

Perhaps reading some of their stories will give you insight into what worked for them and what didn't. Many of the stories are by spouses who have had their partner transition during their relationship. That might help each of you understand the dynamics of what you are experiencing, and thus can help and support the others.

We wish you all the best. Thank you for sharing with us.

I'll give it a look. Thank you

So Adrian and I had a long talk about everything and I feel like I'm understanding what he wants and needs right now. There were some tears shed from both of us, mostly me. This was very necessary in the progression of our relationship and it felt good to get it all out there.

Um....I don't know how to start this but Adrian and Dommy said y'all were nice. I'm Stacy, the resident age regressor, kind of. I don't really have any friends outside of the system, but I want some. Everyone says y'all are nice so I thought I'd start here, so hi!!!!

Hello, Stacy!

Welcome to Susan's Place, and thank you for stepping forward and introducing yourself.

Quote from: Lori Dee on May 13, 2025, 02:15:35 PMHello, Stacy!

Welcome to Susan's Place, and thank you for stepping forward and introducing yourself.

Hi Lori, you're pfp is pretty!!! Being front during the day is weird but I'm glad I did

Quote from: Adrian26 on May 13, 2025, 02:36:58 PMHi Lori, you're pfp is pretty!!! Being front during the day is weird but I'm glad I did

Thank you. We are glad you did, too. 

Hm I thought that when I started talking I'd know what to say but the creative juices appear to have dried up

Quote from: Adrian26 on May 13, 2025, 02:41:33 PMHm I thought that when I started talking I'd know what to say but the creative juices appear to have dried up

That's okay. Many of our members prefer to remain silent and just read news and the stories of other members. There is nothing wrong with that.

Well Adrian and Dommy have started couples therapy. They're doing good. Ally (the original) is having a hard time with the body being trans. Amanda is embracing her female side after repressing begin trans for a while. Max is still being a weirdo, but he's fun. Cole and Lilly are still going steady after like 4 years now. The others don't really show up and are usually just dormant

Quote from: Adrian26 on May 13, 2025, 01:55:35 PMUm....I don't know how to start this but Adrian and Dommy said y'all were nice. I'm Stacy, the resident age regressor, kind of. I don't really have any friends outside of the system, but I want some. Everyone says y'all are nice so I thought I'd start here, so hi!!!!

Hi Stacy and welcome!