LAst week I went to Sweden with a travelling company of 20 people , of all ages, and 5 guides!

On the first day some people asked whether I wanted to be talked to as a he or she.....gawd, I wish that never happened haHa

Oh well....at day 5, 2 days before we left to go back to Holland I was sitting in a group with people my age (24) and we started talking and things....and suddenly a lesbian girl said "I have an opinion about you but Im not sure if you want to hear it "..So I got curious and asked her if we could sit on the nearby grassfield to hear what she had to say.

WE went over to the grassfield and then she said she fell in love with me. Never before did she she fall in love with a male, saying that I was special and emitting something she was very attracted to.

I was shocked...how could a "guy" be any interest for a lesbian? I still think about that....but she said she didnt like men in how they look and act to be attractive for her.

I felt very appreciated at that moment, especially after she said there were definately girls that would like me. I felt attracted to her aswell, something I didnt expect because I normally like long black haired more feminine looking women. She is more the alternative punky type with short hair

WE chatted and kisses a lot that night. The next morning we both felt guilty about our declarations , knowing that she has a girlfriend who she is in a terrible relationship with ( people advised her to stop with it before the vacation began, and her girlfriend is depressed and often suicidal)

So I said she had to work out her own relationship first. After I got home I got a text message with her telephonenumber. I called her excitedly and we talked for an hour .

But whats really bothering me, and I told her that - she thought about it too, was the part when we would get closer, more intimate. Shes a lesbian, and I am not a woman bodily...so the thought of having sex frightens and scares me since I know I cant compete with a woman on that part and might dissapoint her and myself. I really dont want that to happen but neither will I lie to my psychologist and say I want a sex change...thats just not me....I like my penis. But its really bothering me and I am close to saying to her that I want to be friends instead of something that might evolve into something more intimate

The whole situation seems like a rarity to me, with a pretty and dark face

Does anyone have experience with it?

I am not sure if I should continue

I can totally see your discomfort in the sexual aspect.... I've had a crush on someone that kinda ruins me thinking of that part...


Sounds like you're in the same boat for different reasons.

Sex is not the whole world in a relationship.  To be intimate with someone goes way beyond the physical action.  It is the emotional part of intimacy that is the important part.  Sex is just a side benefit.  I really believe that you can be intimate with someone even if you are miles apart. 

I am looking for that kind of relationship, but it is important that whomever I become intimate with needs to understand that mt transition is of paramount importance to me.  If they can accept that then I could fall very deeply in love with them.

As I journey onward I am realizing that even though I  call myself straight that gender and birth sex is becoming less important to me as the emotional intimacy.  So I guess I am more Bi than straight.  And that is fine by me.

Mistress Janet

I never bought (and most studies back me up) that anyone is gay or straight, most people are bi, and are a bit more able to shift back and forth as the heart demands.

Quote from: tekla on August 11, 2008, 12:35:17 PM
I never bought (and most studies back me up) that anyone is gay or straight, most people are bi, and are a bit more able to shift back and forth as the heart demands.

In the studies I have seen, the men are iffy, women on the other hand are considered very fluid in their sexuality.



If she (and you) is willing Veetje, go with it and see where it goes. There is no harm in that.

Hi Veetje.

She approached you knowing you don't have a female body, so I don't think you would disappoint her in anyway. The sex may be a little awkward at first since she's lesbian but I get the feeling if she were concerned about that, she would not have come on to you.

Quote from: Nero on August 12, 2008, 08:51:58 AM
Hi Veetje.

She approached you knowing you don't have a female body, so I don't think you would disappoint her in anyway. The sex may be a little awkward at first since she's lesbian but I get the feeling if she were concerned about that, she would not have come on to you.

This is true... And kind of like... A good thought to have floating around with not just the OP.

Well thank you all for the advice....

I decided to be passive and let her take the initiative if she still wants to keep contact and take it further...that way I feel more comfortable and appreciated

Quote from: Veetje on August 13, 2008, 03:33:00 AM

Well thank you all for the advice....

I decided to be passive and let her take the initiative if she still wants to keep contact and take it further...that way I feel more comfortable and appreciated

I agree with the others about the sexual part of the relationship; I think that will work out fine in the end if and when both of you approach that with an open mind (and perhaps some humour to ease the tension).

And I agree with you about letting her approach you. She is, after all, still in a relationship with another person. It is up to her to make a decision concerning that. I mean, perhaps all parties involved are fine with things the way they are now, but I presume that you want to be with someone who is loyal to you only. But I could be wrong about that, of course. Not all people are monogamous and/or want to be.

Follow your heart, take it as slow as you want, and you'll do just fine.

PolarBear