Like I said, my past is not anyone else's business. I feel no compulsion to share it with strangers. My privacy is very important to me. You speak of being ashamed. What has shame got to do with it? Maybe it's revealing that you introduced shame into the topic, but I am not coming at it from that angle.

I don't get the feeling of guilt for passing. I feel it's my right to be who I am and I deserve to be acknowledged for it. Who I am is a woman. I don't experience any feelings of guilt for being the wrong kind of woman or whatever. I just don't believe that being transsexual places me into a separate sub-category of woman that would make me feel guilty for "passing" as the "right" kind of woman. I am the right kind of woman already. I don't recognize the existence of second-class types of women. Women are just women, we're all equal in human worth and dignity, and that's that. I know I am just as good a woman as anyone else, so no guilt about being me, no guilt about being able to function in the world as the woman I am.

Embrace what we are? Oh yes, I wrap my arms around me and I hug myself. As for how I got to this place in my life, that is private and as a general rule I guard my privacy. People need to mind their own business.

Cindy smiles. 

Cindy

I don't recognize the existence of second-class types of women.
If your really, day in and day out treat the crack-ho on the corner with exactly the same respect and deference that you show your female superiors at work...then you are an awesome democratic person, but I find that most of that stuff goes out the window when class comes into it.  That's just America after all.

Treating crack-ho with respect huh!
That just happens to be my job at the women's shelter here in down town Vancouver. We have as many as 200 street women go through the shelter during one shift. I treat them with respect, care and I fill their needs. I consider them my sisters and they consider me as one of their sisters, they are humans and they are women, some still having enough dignity and appreciation to say thanks when they leave, just like anyone else they are shown respect.

Cindy

if a guy likes football, and visits football websites often, does that make him a footballer?

she visits those subforums for information and to help others with the knowlage she has. Doesnt mean she has to identify as it.

She has a transsexual past, that much is fact, same with me, but like her, i identify as a WOMAN, full stop, this has had no bearing on my personality, im still me... im still the same girl i was all my life. What we really need to read from her initial post, is NOT 'lawl im not a ->-bleeped-<- anymoreyaboosucks' is 'This is my experience, my life, and my views, im sharing it for informations sake' she is giving an insight into stealth mostly, and how it just doesnt work now. Instead of being disparaging, we should be supportive.

and for a forum that bickers if people dont accept thier view of gender, there is an aweful lot of anger and angst towards those who DONT identify as 'trans' something anymore.... Ghetto mentality tbh.... those who leave are 'letting the side down'

I'm on other trans sites and some get offended when someone else says that transsexualism is a medical condition.  Some transfolk DO feel that being trans IS their identity.

Yes, I am a transsexual, I am in the process of transitioning.  When I come out the other side, fully transitioned, I don't want to be known as that transguy, but just that guy.  Not that I won't be an advocate; I just may do that.  But in my day to day life it will be on a need to know basis.

Interesting thread, for sure.


Jay

so if its not medical, its a mental condition?

im afraid weather they like it or not, transsexuality is medical,




ive always found 'trans' as an identity curious.


You never meet folk who identify as liver cancer.

do they build thier identity around that? or is it just a fact of thier life?

Thank you, Rachael, you've understood exactly what I meant to say and corroborated it very well.

There are lots of cancer survivors walking around you see every day that don't feel a need to go around advertising the fact to all and sundry.
Many of their close friends probably know, but never make a big deal of it.
Some of them may find it worthwhile to participate in cancer-survivor and cancer-patient forums to share tips and support. So those who share the similar condition are let in on the fact, in the very apt phrase that Jay used, "on a need to know basis."
A few of them feel it's their calling to become public advocates for cancer research, and may even publicize the fact that they've had cancer as part of their advocacy as if to say, Look, I beat it, let's help others beat it.
Many more than those few will support the cause behind the scenes without going public about it.

But in any case, I really doubt that "cancer survivor" is the primary means of identifying themselves to the world, the first thing they tell you when introducing themselves at a cocktail party, the first line in their Who's Who entry. Except perhaps for those few who devote their lives to full-time advocacy and literally make it their professional career.

And I'm just saying it's all good.

Well ive always considerd transgender an umbrella for the community,

but now, it seems in the uk atleast in the NUS circles, Trans is the umbrella, and 'transgender' is the new transsexual, as well lets face it.... its nothing to do with bloody sex....

TransGENDER is the umbrella term in the U.S. also, covering a wide array of gender variant persons, while TranSEXUAL is used only for those seeking medical correction.

I identify with the term trans fully as that describes me now "in transition".
When I do transition fully though as Jay said I want to be just a guy like any other guy.  Because that is what I am, I identify with the male gender identity, I am not androgyne though I think that's awesome and fab,  I identify with a gender dammit and that gender is male.
However I don't think I would hide the fact that I had been through transition providing the situation was appropriate of course.  It's just as the original poster said, it's really none of anyones business unless I choose to make it there business or in the case of legal or medical necessity.
And I know for sure the trans community will always be a part of my life and I will do whatever I can to support my fellow brothers and sisters and to further our community for the better.

That isn't what I said, Glenda, that isn't where I'm coming from. You're misinterpreting my words. Please knock it off already. Go ahead and express those thoughts all you want, it's fine with me, but please start a different thread in which to say so, because what you're describing is not me.

Just for an update.

Speaking for myself I have been full time for nine years now and was away from the trans everything for 6 years. I was well established in my work as a social worker and was respected for who I am after the first two years adjustment for the folks I associated with everyday. I was living a life as a woman, period. My love and I moved here to Vancouver and I was involved with the Trans suport comunity for a time and then moved on to another pursuit as a Peer Support worker for a local women's shelter.

I still attend the suport group meeting for TS every second week or so, but I am no longer engaged in any other enterprise. I also run two meetup groups in Surrey twice a month, one an all women's group and the other is a mixed group. At home I spend some time on a Yahoo Groups of my own and this board. Only this board and the TS suport group know about my TS history. So it can be done, call it stealth or just plain living as myself.

Cindy   

Once again another susans topic goes madly off the rails....

Guys, dolls, and things.... Hypatia is NOT saying she is 'normal' and you are weird, and wants nothing to do with you. Please read her post's WORDS before fyling into a blind rage at the thought of someone wanting to not be part of the wonderful ->-bleeped-<-gasm of an idenity you may love.

News flash....



Some do not like the fact they were born transsexual.

I happen to share this feeling, and unlike milliontoone, i have never identified as anything but a girl. Yeah, i transitioned, yeah, 'technically' im whatever label you want to use under the sun, but My identity, why i transitioned in the first place is female. end of.... I dont get this 'i identify as a man before, transgender during and woman after' mlarkey... heck, why would your identity change?

Transition happened yes. but do you see people with say... diabetes identifying as 'glucose intollerant' becase they are? no, they identify as the man or woman they were before... thats what this community misses... it focuses too much on gender as being a core part of ones identity... being almost all there is to an identity tbh... the whole trans community as a group puts too high a significance on gender...

Guys, get out... There is so much this community ignores from identity... they ignore musical taste, friends, hobbies.... heck half the time it seems this is most's hobby....

in the words of a wise man:
Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a f**king big television, Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players, and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance. Choose fixed- interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisure wear and matching luggage. Choose a three piece suite on hire purchase in a range of f**king fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing sprit- crushing game shows, stuffing ->-bleeped-<-ing junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing you last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, f**ked-up brats you have spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that?

Go fishing?

Cindy

Quote from: Rachael on October 21, 2008, 06:55:58 AM
so if its not medical, its a mental condition?

im afraid weather they like it or not, transsexuality is medical,




ive always found 'trans' as an identity curious.


You never meet folk who identify as liver cancer.

\

FROM NOW ON I WANNA BE CALLED FIBROBOY BECAUSE THAT IS MY IDE NTIYY

uh. I have a fever. That may not be as funny as I think it is.

It is funny, Fibroboy.   

I identify as a woman. A woman is what I am, and I haven't even gone full-time yet. I've been in a male body for about 25 years, but I can't say I was really male. It was just a physical trait and had little to do with who I really am.

I call myself a transwoman some of the time, but only to people I'm out to (and almost no one knows me as male, they know me either as a woman or a transwoman), and usually only when what I'm saying pertains to my trans status. I avoid the term transsexual because of the "sexual" in it, but it has nothing to do with thinking people who specifically identify as "transsexual" are sexual deviants or some such. It's just a matter of linguistics. Transsexual is a misnomer. Despite the tendency to use the word "sex" to refer to a person's gender, that term also carries with it the implication of sexual activity, which is completely unrelated to what I am, and I believe, to what most people here are.

Transgender, in my view, is a far more appropriate term, regardless of the intent of the person who coined the term.

However, I rarely use that term either. I, personally, prefer to just use the terms transwomen and transmen, if I'm going to refer to trans status at all. They are very accurate terms. They call the person by their correct gender, but also acknowledge their dysphoric past.

I was going somewhere with this post, but I've forgotten where that was. 

Quote from: Princess Katrina on October 26, 2008, 02:03:55 PM
I identify as a woman. A woman is what I am, and I haven't even gone full-time yet. I've been in a male body for about 25 years, but I can't say I was really male. It was just a physical trait and had little to do with who I really am.

I call myself a transwoman some of the time, but only to people I'm out to (and almost no one knows me as male, they know me either as a woman or a transwoman), and usually only when what I'm saying pertains to my trans status. I avoid the term transsexual because of the "sexual" in it, but it has nothing to do with thinking people who specifically identify as "transsexual" are sexual deviants or some such. It's just a matter of linguistics. Transsexual is a misnomer. Despite the tendency to use the word "sex" to refer to a person's gender, that term also carries with it the implication of sexual activity, which is completely unrelated to what I am, and I believe, to what most people here are.

Transgender, in my view, is a far more appropriate term, regardless of the intent of the person who coined the term.

However, I rarely use that term either. I, personally, prefer to just use the terms transwomen and transmen, if I'm going to refer to trans status at all. They are very accurate terms. They call the person by their correct gender, but also acknowledge their dysphoric past.

I was going somewhere with this post, but I've forgotten where that was. 

Well FWIW Miz Katrina, I agree-- I'm a guy first and only a transman where medical or political things come into play. Never Transsexual because while I find gender transgression attractive, transness is NOT transgressive, it's reparative.

Posted on: October 26, 2008, 12:33:14 pm

---

Quote from: Hypatia on October 26, 2008, 12:36:38 PM
It is funny, Fibroboy.   

*dons a tee shirt with a giant F on it, ties a cheap rectangle of flammable nylon to the back of a wheelchair, inserts a pillow and sits on it*

STOP OR I'LL....zzzz