Quote from: Vexing on May 12, 2009, 06:26:29 PM
Banning pink.
A pink nazi.
Wonderful.

What else will you ban your children from doing?

I find that reprehensible.

Read my post again hun.
Specifically;

Quote from: Miniar on April 19, 2009, 03:46:19 PM
As she's grown up I've let her make her own decisions as to colours to wear and such

Try and read what I say, not read "into" it what you want. I do go through the trouble of writing what I mean, as I mean it.

Hasn't anyone else seen the episode of Rick & Steve where a lesbian couple has a baby and doesn't want to know her/his gender?  I am failing my search at finding a video clip

Quote from: Miniar on May 13, 2009, 08:17:31 AM
Read my post again hun.
Specifically;
Try and read what I say, not read "into" it what you want. I do go through the trouble of writing what I mean, as I mean it.

Riiiiiight.
So it's okay to be a colour nazi in their youth.
But not as they get older.
It's a colour FFS, why BAN it?

Quote from: Vexing on May 13, 2009, 03:21:10 PM
Riiiiiight.
So it's okay to be a colour nazi in their youth.
But not as they get older.
It's a colour FFS, why BAN it?

Because I'm not raising a "pretty little princess" nor "a brave soldier". I'm raising a human being, not a "doll".
I did not let my family buy "doll clothes" for my "human being", that hardly makes me a "nazi" of any kind.

FYI, colours don't define your child's personality.
What if your child wants to be a pretty little princess or a brave soldier?
Are you going to actively prevent them being one?

If we stopped color coding gender society would find another way to brain wash us about how act and react Within their culture. Blue and pink seems to be the easy way. K I S S, Keep It Simple Stupid. I beleive cultures have always had some way to control the way we differentiate gender. Actually when the person gets old enough the individual will know which gender is necessary or prefered.

Quote from: Vexing on May 13, 2009, 03:31:01 PM
FYI, colours don't define your child's personality.
What if your child wants to be a pretty little princess or a brave soldier?
Are you going to actively prevent them being one?

And again.. I point to my original post where I said... and I quote... Again...
"As she's grown up I've let her make her own decisions as to colours to wear and such "

Colours don't define personality, they don't define gender either, but my daughter is a human being and not a "dress up doll" for my family to buy "oooh so pretty" things for.

And I'm not preventing "her" from dressing in colours or being herself. Apparently you're having a hard time understanding this part of my original post, so I'll quote it once more. "As she's grown up I've let her make her own decisions as to colours to wear and such "

Quote from: Miniar on May 13, 2009, 05:02:00 PM
Colours don't define personality, they don't define gender either,

I'm glad we agree.

Quotebut my daughter is a human being and not a "dress up doll" for my family to buy "oooh so pretty" things for.

Clearly, you thought that anything pink is designed for 'dress up dolls', yes?
Else why did you forbid it?

Quote from: Vexing on May 13, 2009, 05:22:58 PM
Clearly, you thought that anything pink is designed for 'dress up dolls', yes?
Else why did you forbid it?

I understand Miniar's point of banning pink.  When people buy gifts for a baby girl, there is usually an overwhelming amount of pink and there tends to be a lot of frilly, extremely "girly" clothing (like those poofy dresses with all that fluffy stuff under them to make them stick out...).  Banning pink to ensure a more diverse wardrobe doesn't make someone a color nazi.  I think that's where the conflict came up.  I agree with Miniar's response.  It's best NOT to read into something and make a comment like "color nazi"...that's a statement that is going to be seen as confrontational and it's just best not to go there.  Also, the dress up dolls thing...again, don't read into what someone says.  A lot of clothes designed for baby girls are over the top and a lot of people give those as gifts because they do want to dress little girls up like dolls.  It doesn't mean that all pink clothes are for dress up dolls and Miniar didn't say that.  Again, just try not to read into things...we can avoid a lot of conflict by taking a step back and trying to see what the person actually meant.

Just make sure that your not forcing your own weird brand of fashion or taste or attitudes about clothing on your own kid.  Might turn out she or he likes pink and frilly.  It happens.

Quote from: tekla on May 14, 2009, 02:13:37 AM
Just make sure that your not forcing your own weird brand of fashion or taste or attitudes about clothing on your own kid.  Might turn out she or he likes pink and frilly.  It happens.

Well, Miniar had already addressed that...repeatedly...

Quote from: Vexing on May 13, 2009, 05:22:58 PM
I'm glad we agree.
Clearly, you thought that anything pink is designed for 'dress up dolls', yes?
Else why did you forbid it?

Vex, as we've already said to one another, we like each other. But, girl, you are pretty insistent on arguing points that have been clarified.

If Miniar is letting his daughter decide what to wear herself as she gets older (prolly not so much in the first two years as most kids don't seem to express much preferences unless they've been totally conditioned to do) then I would read that as the daughter chooses her own preferences.

The fact that Miniar discourages, shall we say, his family from pushing certain types of clothing at his daughter doesn't seem at all Nazi-ish to me. One might see that very easily as an affirmative step he takes so his daughter can be a bit more autonomous about her own choices.

None of that seems particularly hard to understand. So I'm not sure I see your point except as a means of continuing on a line that's been pretty well answered by the person you're querying. Unless the point is to continue arguing. Why not just accept that Miniar has his ideas about raising his own child and how he should do so.

I mean it was just yesterday you made a really good statement along the lines of "where are the parents?" In this case one of them is right there making his decisions and allowing his daughter to make her's while kinda blocking the desires his family may have in affecting his daughter's decisions about clothing.

Quote from: tekla on May 14, 2009, 02:13:37 AM
Just make sure that your not forcing your own weird brand of fashion or taste or attitudes about clothing on your own kid.

It seems to me, of course I've only had the experience of raising a few children and so am no universal seeress in all of this, that to not influence one's children and at some point for them not to be influenced by their peers is kinda like trying to build a dyke to hold out the Atlantic some where along the middle of the Mid-Atlantic Rift and expecting the ocean to be held back in spite of the dyke being underwater.

I mean even raising a child exclusively in a Skinner Box would be to affect that child's growth and development in many ways.

Of course there will be effects. How to stop them other than to kill the child and that seems a sort of self-defeating means of doing so.

Quibbles are fine and all, but finally isn't all of that just a quibble. Doesn't Miniar have to raise his own child?

N~

Quote from: Nichole on May 14, 2009, 01:43:05 PM

If Miniar is letting his daughter decide what to wear herself as she gets older (prolly not so much in the first two years as most kids don't seem to express much preferences unless they've been totally conditioned to do) then I would read that as the daughter chooses her own preferences.

Then what was the point of forbidding pink?

Quote from: Vexing on May 14, 2009, 03:27:18 PM
Then what was the point of forbidding pink?

Asked and Answered.

Quote from: Vexing on May 14, 2009, 03:27:18 PM
Then what was the point of forbidding pink?

Lemme see. Hmmmm .... O, I know, he was forbidding pink to his relatives so the child wouldn't be inundated with all pink clothing as an infant?

Doesn't seem too hard to figure. My sons didn't get all blue for the same reason. I'd already experienced all the "pink" gifts with my oldest daughter and knew darned well that the imaginations of those giving the gifts are often limited to two colors dependant on whether the child has a penis or a vagina at birth?

Yeah, I'm thinking that that's just about what the point of forbidding pink was. He hasn't forbid it to his daughter. He forbade it then to his family and friends. Makes just too much sense to me.

N~

Makes no sense to me.
We'll leave it at that, shall we?

Quote from: Vexing on May 14, 2009, 03:44:25 PM
Makes no sense to me.
We'll leave it at that, shall we?

I think that's prolly what the rest of the folks on the thread have been thinking for awhile, dear.

Just can't leave it alone, even when I've politely bowed out, can you?

I dressed my daughter up (at 18 months) in a blue T-shirt with her father's band name on the front and little army pants (green, brown & black) with a little chain that went from the zipper to the back pocket!
Once I took her outdoor swimming in nothing but a blue and purple swim pant (those diaper swim pants)
On the first day of school two years ago I told my daughters to pick whatever they wanted to wear.  They ignored the name brand clothes their grandparents bought for them.  They both picked outfits I bought from the hand me down store!!!  And for picture day my daughter wore a flower girl dress.
My nephew at age 20 months would walk up and down stairs in his older sisters high heels and he would fall less than me!!!  and if you tried to take his girly shoes away he would cry -ohhhh.
Last year my neighbour borrowed a pair of my everyday pants for her Halloween costume.  Clothes are definitely something to take pictures of and laugh at later.
I used to wear this one outfit in high school I found in my attic, my mom said she wore that outfit on her honeymoon!  Ha!
For my grade 12 picture I wore green lipstick with a green dress.