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how long before you lost the ability to understand the opposite sex?

Started by milktea, August 11, 2010, 12:44:56 PM

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milktea

Quote from: insanitylives on August 11, 2010, 06:47:21 PM
You're implying I ever understood girls.

ya i agree with jmaxley totally...what a dumb thing to talk to the person in the next cubicle about some handbag thingy when taking a piss?? i might say both girls and guys have some wierd habits, girls more so.

but i digress. i'm not saying i read girls minds but the point is way back in the past i can tell when a guy likes a girl and empathise with a guy who's telling me his relational troubles....things like that. somehow that was lost, and now it's like i can't even tell a guy was hitting on me...wtf?????
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I have a post-op recovery blog now...yeah!
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kyle_lawrence

this reminds me of a conversation I had a couple weeks ago with a friend.  We were in his car, and saw a bumper sticker on the SUV in front of us with the stick figures of mom, dad, kids, dog... and other overly cutesy things that make me want to throw up a little. 

Friend: Why are those stickers so popular all of a sudden?
me: I know. I don't understand them. I don't know why I'm trying to though, considering I don't understand like 95% of people.
Friend: why would you want to?
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FairyGirl

Quote from: Teknoir on August 12, 2010, 06:58:57 AM
Just like any other man, I never understood women in the first place.

Men however make perfect sense - even when they're not ;).

that makes no sense to me lol

All I understand about men is that they are highly influenced by testosterone, which means anything could happen. Highly volatile stuff.  As for what they do and why they do it...  ???

Girls rule, boys drool.
If I keep a green bough in my heart, then the singing bird will come.
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M.Grimm

I've never been able to click with/understand women. This is not to say I dislike them, that is not the case at all. It is just very, very rare that I can have a non-baffling discussion with one.

I never realized how badly I interfaced with them until fairly recently when a workshop class I was in was nearly all women. They talked and talked and ...just... I couldn't understand how they could talk THAT MUCH about absolutely nothing. I would zone out within five minutes. And this was prior to my starting T, too.
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Izumi

Quote from: M.Grimm on August 12, 2010, 01:46:39 PM
I've never been able to click with/understand women. This is not to say I dislike them, that is not the case at all. It is just very, very rare that I can have a non-baffling discussion with one.

I never realized how badly I interfaced with them until fairly recently when a workshop class I was in was nearly all women. They talked and talked and ...just... I couldn't understand how they could talk THAT MUCH about absolutely nothing. I would zone out within five minutes. And this was prior to my starting T, too.

you got that right, women talk and men do.  Example: when women typically have an issue they prefer to talk it out, when men have an issue, a few punches and beers typically work itself out...

Woman: I love you so much~
Man: I cleaned the driveway and took snow off your car so you could go to work~  (men's version of I love you)

So when your man doesnt say he loves you, look at what he does, hes probably saying it and your not noticing ~
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Janet_Girl

I never really did understand women.  But as I grow I am understanding us more and more.   And the reverse is true.  I sorta understood guys, having lived in that lie for so long.  But now it is as if they are hidden from me.

So I just apply the typical stereotype of guys and judge from there.  They ether are dead on, slightly off center or are actually a pretty good guy.  The last has not been showed to me as of yet.  ???
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Yakshini

I never really got on with women so well. My best friend is a woman, but aside from her I haven't been able to keep close friendships with women. One gal at a time I can handle, but women in groups? Not so good... I love women, but they do so many things that I just don't get and it bothers me immensely.
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Alainaluvsu

I've always been more talkative in a group of women, with men I find myself shutting my mouth in fear of saying something stupid or either unmanly or trying too hard to be manly. IDK if that counts for anything, but it is what it is!
To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are.



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Alexmakenoise

Most women are pretty baffling to me.  I've never been part of the "girls club".  The way they interact with one another, and the way they think, and the way they express themselves . . . it's all stuff I can't relate to and don't understand.

I've always found it easy to relate to guys though.  I can understand them.  Same with a lot of people who are somewhere between male and female.

I've also noticed that people seem to pick up on the fact that there's something different about me.  It's something that causes almost everyone to perceive me as "really weird", and it causes women to exclude me and men to include me. 
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jmaxley

Oddly enough, I usually feel more comfortable in groups that are mostly women.  When I'm in groups that are mostly guys, I'm really uncomfortable, it makes me super aware of the fact that my body is female, which I don't like.  When I'm around women, I can forget about it easier (unless they bring up about female problems or pregnancy, then I just want to get out of there).
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Arch

Quote from: Izumi on August 12, 2010, 02:09:21 PM
Woman: I love you so much~
Man: I cleaned the driveway and took snow off your car so you could go to work~  (men's version of I love you)

Yikes. So true. But it doesn't quite explain why, when I was doing the "I shoveled the driveway" bit, my ex was complaining that I didn't tell him I loved him...
"The hammer is my penis." --Captain Hammer

"When all you have is a hammer . . ." --Anonymous carpenter
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Eva Marie

I don't really understand guys; never have. And i'm uncomfortable around groups of men as well.

As far as women - i'm not for sure i have much insight there either. I'm definitely more comfortable around groups of women, but as a bio-male i'm somewhat excluded from fitting into that group too  :-\
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Teknoir

Quote from: FairyGirl on August 12, 2010, 12:48:48 PM
that makes no sense to me lol

All I understand about men is that they are highly influenced by testosterone, which means anything could happen. Highly volatile stuff.  As for what they do and why they do it...  ???

Of course it makes sense! When a man is acting irrationally, I can usually understand why he is acting irrationally :).

Testosterone? Volatile? Nah... it just makes you want to hump everything that moves, and eat everything that doesn't. It's very predictable stuff :laugh:.
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Elijah3291

hanging out with my 2 best girl friends from HS, made me realize how much I dont understand women.  yes I still care about my friends, and being a gay guy, I can identify with them a bit more. but they started talking about lingerie.. and im like um wat?

some of the things they wear, say, do i dont understand, women seem so complex to me.
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Autumn

I find myself occasionally groaning at some female-based conversations I get stuck in, and thinking "I don't have any interest at all in this... but socially it's a faux paux not to humor her." I think some of that stuff is just built in icebreakers for women to connect to each other and establish a network in a given situation, and also a social construct that people participate in because they grow up being a part of it.
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BunnyBee

Quote from: Teknoir on August 13, 2010, 12:23:10 PM
Testosterone? Volatile? Nah... it just makes you want to hump everything that moves, and eat everything that doesn't. It's very predictable stuff :laugh:.

Predictability and volatility are not mutually exclusive.  Men are the mentos+diet coke of the human species.
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Nero

Quote from: Yakshini on August 12, 2010, 07:50:30 PM
I never really got on with women so well. My best friend is a woman, but aside from her I haven't been able to keep close friendships with women. One gal at a time I can handle, but women in groups? Not so good... I love women, but they do so many things that I just don't get and it bothers me immensely.

Ditto. I am extremely close with my mom, but don't get the rest of em  :laugh: Don't even get her half the time, but I'm use to her.  :laugh:
Nero was the Forum Admin here at Susan's Place for several years up to the time of his death.
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LordKAT

Quote from: Nero on August 14, 2010, 02:11:59 AM
Ditto. I am extremely close with my mom, but don't get the rest of em  :laugh: Don't even get her half the time, but I'm use to her.  :laugh:

Me too. I never did get em. How annoying it was to be thought as one of them.
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kyril

Quote from: jmaxley on August 11, 2010, 01:36:29 PM
I've never fit in with the girls.  I always felt like everyone was playing a game and no one had told me the rules.  Still haven't figured the rules out, heh.  I don't understand why my friends want to chat with me while I'm taking a pee, it's really embarrassing.  I've never been able to get interested in the conversations of the girls around me.  Their conversation usually revolves around their kids or the lives of people they know (who I usually don't know) or some guy they're interested in or female issues with their bodies (which makes me really uncomfortable).  I'm more into politics, computers, science, how to do a tune up on the car, things of a non-personal nature.
This.

Never understood girls. Likely never will.


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kyril

Quote from: Autumn on August 14, 2010, 01:33:47 AM
I find myself occasionally groaning at some female-based conversations I get stuck in, and thinking "I don't have any interest at all in this... but socially it's a faux paux not to humor her." I think some of that stuff is just built in icebreakers for women to connect to each other and establish a network in a given situation, and also a social construct that people participate in because they grow up being a part of it.
That's kind of how certain "object" talk functions for guys - cars and sports for one subgroup, computers and gaming for another, politics and foreign policy for another, and when all else fails fall back on beer and food.

The difference, I think, is in the lack of personal investment in the topic - it's not terribly rude to redirect the conversation if, for instance, you're a guy who doesn't have a clue about cars. Women seem much more inclined to talk about things they're personally invested in to people they just met. And it's much ruder to tell someone "I don't really care to hear about your kid/cat/ailing mother/the crocheted doilies you spent the last week making by hand for this gathering. Let me tell you about my dog/garden/weight loss regimen." than it is to say "I don't really know anything about cars. Hey, you remember Nintendo?"


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