They like you so much they have become a stalker. ( Have you looked in the saucepan for your sister's gerbil? )

I wish there was something decent on TV.

Granted. There is now a very nice sculpture on top of your television.

I wish I understood something about arrays in program scripts.

Now you do--and you know nothing else and live in your parent's basement scripting all day and drinking diet coke.

I wish my immune system was better.

Your immune system goes into overdrive giving you fibromyalgia.

I wish it were Thanksgiving break.

Quote from: Lee on November 16, 2010, 08:09:59 PM
Your immune system goes into overdrive giving you fibromyalgia.

I wish it were Thanksgiving break.

It is.  You eat Turkey dinner on the first day which causes you to sleep through the rest!

I wish post-secondary school was free.

It is, and now so many people want to go so there is no room for you

I wish I could meet megan fox.

You can, but this kid decides to hunt down all the fans she will actually talk to.

I wish I had started studying earlier for my ochem test.

You did, but they decided to put it on 2 weeks early.

I wish I had Megan Fox's figure.

Granted. You now have a paper with the figure she draws and calls her initials.

I wish I would actually go to bed when I know I should.

Granted. I'll personally come over every night and knock you unconscious.

I wish my straight stalkers would all gather and burn to death.

Granted... You lure your stalkers into standing in a large fire pit and then light them up then relax in a fold out beach chair while the Johnny Cash song "Ring of Fire" plays in the background

I wish someone would knock my next door neighbor unconscious on a regular basis (as in, anytime he's awake)

Granted. I'm the man for that job...as you have seen, I have experience from the last post  . However...I get arrested for multiple assault and your neighbors are still victorious.

I wish I wasn't freaking out right now.

You stop freaking out but now you are in a grumpy mood.


I wish could pass algebra.

You pass Algebra, and end up in the French Lit Exam.  Algebra was on the next floor.

I wish my hair would stay put.

Granted. Your hair falls to the ground and definitely stays put there.

I wish my co-tenant was not so hard-headed.

Their head is now so soft that they have to wear a helmet everywhere.

I wish the weather were  better today.

The weather is better. In fact it's nice and hot out. But your air conditioner breaks and you slowly cook to death in your house.

I wish I had a penis.

Granted... You are now hung like a horse and have a penis a full meter long and everyone calls you "The tripod"

I wish I could send someone to go to the store for me (It's cold and snowing outside  )

Granted. Your 5-year-old cousin offers to do the job. You can send him to the store. But it does not mean he will come back.

I wish winter arrived all of a sudden and left the same way (Like, no -10°C - 8°C - -15°C - rain - snow - sun - snow - rain)

Granted, it's gone from 32' C to -30 overnight, and all your winter clothes are in a trunk in the garage, under a metre of snow.

I wish I didn't have a huge swath of weeds in my lawn giving me hay fever.