There've always been two eating at me.
One is that no matter what I did or how I carried myself, no one will ever see me as anything but a straight-up dude.
The other is that once I start, I won't be able to finish. I'm afraid I'll wake up friendless and penniless stuck in an "in-between" state: so far that I couldn't detransition even if I wanted to, but not nearly far enough to stop the dysphoria.