"suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping..."

[Natasha]

suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain.

do you agree with this statement?

[NicholeW.]

With a qualification, yes. The qualification being "and when the pained one believes that there are no other avenues of coping than the ones already tried."

Nichole

[Ellieka]

I can agree with that statement to some degree. Such a cases happened with my late father-in-law who had terminal cancer. He was so wracked with physical and emotional pain that he begged me to help him end his life. he tried to contact Dr. Jack Kevorkian, and once told me if he had the strength he would walk to a rail road crossing and let a train hit him.

In his case it was not a cry for help such as is often the case when one talks about suicide but rather a result of unbearable pain.

[Janet_Girl]

Unequivocally.  Having tried several times, I was at my wits end and did not know where to turn to.

The first time, I just did not take enough drugs.  The second time a light pole stopped my headlong plunge in to oncoming traffic.  The last time, Janet took over and said "Enough I will not die and I will not be denied.", it was she... ah me... that called 911.

Those who finish the job are in just so much pain and no one will believe or understand where they are coming from.

By the way I am fine now, at 12 months HRT and 6 months RLE.

Janet

[Sarah Louise]

Constant pain and discouragement do strange things to your mind and your ability to make logical decisions.

The answer is Yes, I agree in most part with the premise.

Sarah L.

[Starr]

I believe it completely. When I've been there, I didn't want to die; the idea of continuing in such pain just seemed overwhelming. I did, however, choose not to even try.

[Rhye]

I'm going to go against the flow and say it's a choice. A heavily influenced choice, but a choice nonetheless. Some people faced with intense pain will or will not receive outside help, and out of both groups, some choose to die and some choose not to. I don't think it's a last avenue or an auto-destruct button somewhere in our minds.

[lisagurl]

Through out history it has been noble to sacrifice your life for a cause. Putting yourself at known risk is a type of suicide. It comes down to what is your life worth to yourself and how will it end.

[Just Kate]

I honestly do not know enough to say one way or the other.  I have a tendency to believe there is choice in everything, but honestly I cannot say for sure.  I have had two people in my life attempt suicide in front of me while I was transitioning (both of them MTF as well).  It permanently changed me.  It made me a bastard when it comes to suicide - I have so little empathy anymore when it comes to it, though I know I should have more.  I don't ever want to be in the situation again of talking someone down whose ready to end it - far too much stress.

[Dennis]

I believe it completely. When I've been there, I didn't want to die; the idea of continuing in such pain just seemed overwhelming. I did, however, choose not to even try.

Yes, same. I didn't actually make a choice not to try, I just procrastinated. I'm good at that. Kept telling myself one more month. I can live through one more month. Sometimes it was one more week, or one more day. Then it all got better. But when you're in it, it seems like the pain is unbearable and the inner resources have run dry. I probably should have tried to find some other resources, but I was too pigheaded, or ashamed, to reach out for help.

Dennis

[Jessica]

I agree with it.

[fluffy jorgen]

Agree, partly. With the second part of the statement, but...

Some suicides are done on impulse with the individuals knowing there is another "resource of curing the pain".

And some don't involve any "pain" at all- just an awareness that something is lost.

In shorter words, there are a lot of other reasons why people do it and this just happens to be one of them.

All options are choices which, I guess, make suicide a choice too.

[Diane Elizabeth]

       As one going through the pain right now,  I agree that it is a choice.   The pain (mental and physical) is there and one has a choice to end it immediately or not.  As was stated that all avenues for help come to a dead end and one feels no choice vut too commit suicide.  No two people are exactly a like.  How much pain one can withstand until help arrives is determined by how strong their will to overcome the depression.  It is also predetermined by ones background of who they are, where they grew up, how they were raised and their education level.  There are other variables as well, drug and alcohol usage levels and body issues are a few examples. But the primary variable , as I see it, is "the will to live" in each of us. 

[VeryGnawty]

I agree with the "heavily influenced" choice.  Extra stress on heavily influenced.

It's like someone holding a gun to your head and robbing you of your money.  You can choose NOT to give him your wallet.  It's still a choice.  It's just an influenced choice, because you have a gun to your face.  Suicide is the same way.  The only difference is that the person threatening you isn't holding the gun.  You are.

[Miniar]

I think that as long as it feels like a choice, you haven't experienced your limit.
When your limit is met, you will break. That's just a matter of fact.
Nothing can be stretched indefinitely, everything has it's limits, and when that limit is met, it breaks.

I do believe that it "can" be chosen, but I also "know" that sometimes it's not a choice but the "only" thing a person can do.

I haven't been there yet in my life. I have been able to choose to stick around so far and honestly, with what I've lived through so far, I doubt I'll ever find my own limit and subsequently break.

[Bombi]

I understand the premise and logic of the statement, however I ultimately think suicide is a choice. A selfish choice at best.
I have had personal experience with this subject and felt that it was a practical thing to consider when the joy of life was gone. My first try didn't solve anything or help me to understand why I thought offing myself would make anything better. They second time I considered it I planned my course of action and utilmately either chickened out or found some value in my existence that was obscured and worth conserving.
I rarely have the thoughts anymore and the only circumstances of which I would consider it again would be because of my health and to eliminate pain and suffering.

[LordKAT]

I think that was the point. Suicide used for relief of pain and suffering.

[Cindy]

 I would agree if we define pain as physical beyond endurance or relief. As in terminal cancer etc. I have been very close with emotional pain. But I do not believe that is a choice. Emotional self pain does have choices; even if the choice is just time.

I had a colleague who killed himself because he was in debt. I thought that was a very selfish act. It was only a few hundred dollars and was more shame than anything else.

Cindy

[Carolyn]

When one decides to end there own existence for whatever reason, it is a poor choice. The only time it is acceptable to me is when it is under one of the following:

Your a Samurai doing it for honor
Your a Ninja who has failed his/her mission
Your a Spy found out
Your going to be tortured for information and then killed
Your going to die a slow painful death

If it is not under any of these, then you are weak and it is a good thing you end yourself, you provide this world with nothing, so be gone. There is always a choice, remember, The strong live, the weak die.

[VeryGnawty]

If it is not under any of these, then you are weak and it is a good thing you end yourself

You are forgetting about santhara.

That is a legitimate reason for suicide.