Brandon - you seem so bent on shooting down every option with all your posts.
You can't change the fact you don't have a perfect, biological male downstairs; 100% that is true. Who cares what some random girls in your HS think about that? They won't matter as soon as you graduate. People with actual experience dating cis women are telling you that it is possible. I could link to you 10 videos of ftm guys interviewing their hot girlfriends about what it is like to date a trans guy.
Branch out. Find a local GLBT resource in your area and meet those people.
Focus like a laser on a goal to distract yourself. You said you are working to get on T? I would talk to a therapist as part of this process. You seem to have so much anger and self hatred built up inside of you - it will get better, I promise. You don't need to tackle every problem about this all at once - In fact, you can't.