Hi everyone, It's my Birthday!!!

[Tasha_]

I'd love to talk to you girls more, but don't get off work for 5 more hours.... Amber, I'd totally be willing to let you vent if you need, whatever it's related to.... hope to talk to you all soon!!!

[amberwaves]

I'd love to talk to you girls more, but don't get off work for 5 more hours.... Amber, I'd totally be willing to let you vent if you need, whatever it's related to.... hope to talk to you all soon!!!

I might take you up on that offer later.  I have things to get accomplished yet today anyway.  In sorry I didn't post yet in the other thread.  I'm so happy you had a great experience out with your wife.  I feel bad for not congratulating you earlier on such a big step, but I have just wanted to crawl under a rock lately.  I've been meaning to.

[Tasha_]

Understandable, we all have those times!!!

[Rachel_Christina]

Hey Sarah! its great that you are properly out to all now, but I can highly understand the voice!
I hate my voice, but as I am not out I deal with it! But if I cant change it when I do I'm doomed :S
Though apparently it helps alot when your out and socializing with other females.
I haven't been up to much working at all week, trying sort out the importation of my car into this country, serious drag, and shopping the weekends :3
I'v become real addicted to the later!
And hows life now livinv properly? Any unforseen situations that you'v noticed?
Hugs, Christine.

[Tasha_]

I think we all get a little addicted to shopping!!! I went into town dressed for the first time last weekend, and finally felt comfortable shopping... it was sooo hard to stop!!! But even when I am in man mode, I have my wife to give me a smokescreen while shopping, so usually only the dressing room attendants end up knowing... but I have quite literally expanded my wardrobe to 3 times what it was before, and now own 19 pairs of shoes as opposed to 2.... lol...

[Tasha_]

The voice thing can definitely be hard, I have been trying to "find my voice" for a few months now and barely feel confident enough to try it around my wife, who I really think has a hard time being too objective about it, but she says I sound passable. I still worry that I am going to have a "man fail" with my voice while I'm out still ... lol.... all you can really do is listen to every YouTube possible and try to train your vocal cords.... I hear it can take a long time to really get it....

Have a great day/night girls!!!

Tasha

[Rachel_Christina]

I'v been out once in public for my therapist, I had a few whistles and people starring from cars I headed down the street! I could not believe! Confidence +++++ :3
Me a my grilfriend do the same, shopping she goes round looking at everything, but its really just for me! :')
It is amasing the difference in shopping, I feel like I have a certain style! I never bothered before, though I always knew what I liked as a female!
And we have the same feet size too, so its so easy for me!
The voice is the killer when your out dressed!
We are all so obsessed with looking great, we forget ther is plenty women out ther that you would wonder about, as soon as they sound female you never second guess it!
We need to perfect it! >_<

[Tasha_]

I have always had to ask for my size and try shoes on... but Charlotte Russe is cool about it.... but I did the shopping thing dressed up once, and now I am dying to do it again!!!! Sooo much fun!!!!

My first time out dressed up (the same time, last week) my wife caught a man checking me out, and when I got to the car, I actually got hit on!! At the Olive Garden, I must have sounded just feminine enough to pass, because you should have seen the look on the waitresses face when I gave her my ID... lol.... but it was really empowering, and I really wa t to do it again...

Nice to meet you by the way... do you go by Christine or Rachel??

Tasha

[Rachel_Christina]

Oh I will have to try it a day when my confidence is sky high!
Oh my god I know, its so funny, they are such chancers men!
We will get alot more of it once we are full time I'd guess.
Men are always after women! We just never realised :')
Oh that would be great experience, I'd love to have someone come up to me and send them packing with the guy voice ha, but it could be dangerous :S but worth the lolz?
Nice to meet you too Tasha. Yes Christine is fine!
I just use the female version of my guy name and the second name is the name my mother would have called her daughter,.... Suprise ha, I don't tjink it will be so funny come the time I come out though :')

[Tasha_]

I really do imagine rejecting a man with my man voice.... but that would also make me uncomfortable... and you're gonna have to try shopping while dressed... I have an hour drive to the closest place that I can actually shop, so it kind of easy for me to not have to worry about being recognized before I am ready. Today makes about six times in public dressed, and three of those happened in the last two weeks.... starting to get a little more secure now....

What do you girls think about giving out "normal" email address if you are not out to everybody yet? I don't know if I should make an alternate for this, or just use my existing.... I am truly at an impasse as to what to do here....

Anyways, thanks for the input and support girls,
Tasha

[Rachel_Christina]

Ha I know, but atleast like not dressed kind of keeps control over me! Once I'm out and dressed, I'l be taking the stores with me!
Its great your more relaxed now, but the email I wouldn't risk it if your not out, I made two anyway!
Its how I feel anyway, not until I'm out to my family first!
Hugs, Christine

[Tasha_]

Under control is something I am not, went out tonight shopping too.... 100 dollars later my wife is like "you used to give me so much >-bleeped-< for this!!!!" And I can only sulk.... thanks for the advise on email, I'll give it a couple more days.... I'm at least gonna add you on here for now...

[Rachel_Christina]

Its funny, life as a female is so much more expensive! As A man I spent nothing on myself, I always felt buy man clothes as a waste of money! My mother would always conplain, I'd wear the same thing till it wher nothing but rags :')
Adding me on here? What does that mean?
But yea its the same as the "what do you drive" thread, I can't post mine cause of fear people would see and maybe clock me!
That sends the fear of god through me :S

[Tasha_]

It's just a buddy list, mostly so I don't forget to say hi if o don't hear from you for a while....

[Rachel_Christina]

Aw yea I just realised, added you up ther too! That is handy

[amberwaves]

ChristineRachel I don't think I've said hi to you yet, despite the fact that we post in a lot of the same threads. 

I've always liked shopping, just not for clothes and shoes.  I typically hovered around the electronics and books sections of stores.  The grocery store is an especially bad place if I don't have a list.  I am an excellent cook and will buy half the store if left to my own devices.  Now I really love wandering the women's clothing section, especially with my wife.  I still am a bit uncomfortable doing it by myself.

I had my first visit with a gender therapist yesterday.  It went well.  I showed up dressed as Amber.  I did my nails Sunday night and they are so cute.  Previously I've been terrible at doing them so I am ecstatic that they turned out good. had to go out out in guy mode because I had to drop my kids off with my wife's grandparents first.  They will in no way be accepting so I hid my nails from them.  I changed clothes when I stopped for coffee on the way to my visit.  The only thing wrong is that I have a laser session today and they want me to have a few days growth so I had scruff all over my face.

I was nervous as crap when I showed up there.  Its a little weird to hear myself referred to as Amber.  I dont think of myself as Amber or my old name...i am just me in my head.  My wife just calls me hon and such.  Its nice, but im just not used to it.

My therapist is very nice.  It was incredibly awkward to discuss things because  I am such a private person and don't typically talk about these things.  We talked about what I wish to accomplish and I told her that I am pretty comfortable with my status and being rather pragmatic about coming out to people.  My wife is accepting and supportive.  Primarily, I am there because the doctor wants a letter to begin HRT.  I told her my goal is to transition to living as a woman.  I do not intend on getting SRS.  She told me that typically they want to see people for 3 months before they will write a letter.  I have already scheduled with the dr there for July.  I figure April, May, June = 3 months so I should be good to go.

On the drive home (about an hour long) I really had to pee.  I looked at myself in the mirror and figured there was no way I could use the men's room.  Unfortunately, with the stubble I wasn't quite comfortable with the ladies room.  Eventually I did build up the nerve to sneak into and out of the ladies room like a ninja.  My wife was laughing at me when I told her that story.  On the whole, I am making progress forward and plotting how/when to come out to more of my friends.

[SarahElizabeth1981]

Hi Girls,
    You have been busy posting while I've been away from here.  I have to catch up.

And hows life now living properly? Any unforseen situations that you'v noticed?
Hugs, Christine.

Actually everything is going really good. I've yet to have to deal with any really rude or bigoted people. I get some odd looks or stares but I just find that funny.

I hear you about life being more expensive as a women. the make up, the skin care, the clothes, the shoes.... it just never ends. but the shopping is soo much fun. I spent over an hour trying on shoes the other day. soo many shoes.... soo little money!  I need to find me a pretty dentist. I hear they make lots of money. Then she can support me in the manner to which I wish to become accustomed. hahaha

I went to a shoe store near the place I go for electrolysis, been in there lots, looking for some flats. I found some and also saw some cute black heals but they didn't quite fit. there is another store (same chain) in the mall that had 'em in a size bigger. if they have to send you to another store they give you a little slip for a few bucks off so i wondered down to the other store. left there with two more pairs of shoes. You can see all my shoes here https://onedrive.live.com/redir?resid=FD2E69EEBBCB5A3D!107&authkey=!AGB0DMMcwRN3kAY&ithint=folder%2cjpg//
My stripper boots are sooo shiny it's hard to take a good picture of them. but they are there too.

Congratulations on seeing the therapist Amber. I saw mine today. I told her I was getting this whole women thing down as I was already up to like 20 pairs of shoes (including mens) and told her the story above. she thought it was pretty funny. She also said that after our next session she will refer me to endo to start HRT. I'm SOOOO EXCITED!!! I see her May 4 and then it will take a couple months to get in so by early july i think. It would be funny if I ended up on the same day as you Christine.    Just got to get into a vertility clinic so i can give some of my little swimmers a nice new home.   

your wife saying you used to give her a "hard time about this" is too funny tasha. Men just don't get it. Maybe it's just cause they don't have any cute clothes to buy! haha

Amber I know what you are talking about with the stubble. I hate it soo much. on the bright side I'm thinking another 10 - 15 hours of electrolysis and most of my face should be cleared. Can't wait. My war against hair will wage on till I win, for now waxing and epilating and electrolysis will continue. Oh, and some laser too. I hear hormones help a lot so that something I'm really looking forward to.

the voice is a big thing too. I talked to the voice therapist the other day and it'll probably be August before that starts. I really hate my voice especially when I'm out interacting with people. talk you girl later, take care.

[Rachel_Christina]

Hiya Amber, yes we have been around alot of the same spots, I hope you don't think I'm following you!
That is quiet the collection to Sarah, I acctually have no shoes yet, I'v been stealing my girlfriends :') I'm in such a tight spot financialy at the minute though, with importation process of my car, can't spend too much.
That would be pretty cool if we started at the same time alright, we could compare progress.
I haven't bothered with the facial hair yet simply because I think its best waiting for hormones, that way they wont cone back? Role on July! :3
Take care Girls!
Christine

[amberwaves]

I hope you don't think I'm following you!

It's okay if you are.  You seem nice and I can certainly think of worse people to be stalking me.  My wife may not appreciate it, lol.

I only have 3 pairs of shoes atm.  I get very discouraged and self conscious shopping for them due to larger feet.  Plus the finances are rather tight.  I will get there eventually.  I do find it interesting that so many of us are on similar time frames.  I should be starting hormones around July or August if things go to plan.

[Josefa]

 SarahElizabeth,

Wow love the thread you started here, so much information absorb.  I have read it several times now.  Write more.

Josefa