Yesterday was my appointment with my mental health office and it was merely intake. I didn't actually get to see the psychiatrist, but I did talk to a couple of individuals; one being a low ranking personnel (he took notes for one of the mental health officers) and the other being a mental health officer. The former was as calm as can be and seemed to be very understanding, while the latter seemed a bit nervous. I think that it was due to her being unfamiliar with the process and trying to orient herself to a new perspective. This is very new to the Air Force, so I can definitely understand why she was not really well-prepared to talk. I suspect that she didn't really know how to deal with it, nor did she want to screw it up.
On the upside, I was told that I am the first at this assignment to want to press forward with transitioning and that I'm not the only one on base who identifies as transgender. The downside is that I have to wait one more week to see the person with whom I initially had the intention to see. I tried to keep my face calm and neutral so that I didn't put her further into her anxiety about it. I couldn't quite tell, though, whether she was nervous in regard to her performance, or if she was holding back her emotions and judgments. Something wasn't quite right, with her, but I don't blame her for it. When given the chance again, I want to reassure her that she did a wonderful job keeping her composure.
With my imminent progress toward HRT, I can foresee my transition being a challenge for people's worldview and beliefs. I've always been a patient person toward others, so it won't be a challenge for me to do so throughout the transition, but it will be a challenge to not take things personally, once I begin to express my gender identity.
Progress is progress, I suppose.
(Also posted to my transition blog)
