Happy New Year girls. Time to get ridiculously drunk. See y'all tomorrow-ish  

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Happy New year Jerrica!! And the rest of you wherever you are girls, enjoy the celebrations!

Will celebrate in the morning. Happy New Year to you all. Good night.


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Happy New year's ladies!!!!

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Happy new years girls. I'm looking forward to a great 2017. 

Happy New Year and 2017 is gonna be epic x

Ever heard of the Kinsey scale for sexuality scores?

Been curious about my own recent occasional interest in guys so ofc screwing around online playing with tests for fun seeing as I can't exactly go experimenting atm. Putting no stock in any of it but it's fun.

So anyway as I understand it the say 0=Hetero and 6=Homo from a male perspective. Given I'm not male I'd figure the scores should be flipped.

Interestingly despite my musings I got a 0 which would make me 100% lesbian.

Guess I'll need to wait until I'm fixed then go find out directly.

Lol Jerrica!!! Everybody is bi....


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(To a degree)

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I consider myself a lesbian since I feel I am a woman and prefer women.


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I have always enjoyed anal, but also prefer women, but, there is an element of bisexuality in everyone..... I'm not even attracted to men.... Really....

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I have no interest in men.


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I agree everyone has the potential for bi in a don't knock it it til you've tried it kinda way but are generally programmed to resist massively and almost unconsciously.

The memories I have been able to access only ever fixated on women and for sex stuff lesbian women at that. Couldn't even process the thought of hetro in anything but a clinical manner. Perhaps an extension of my brains own tiny rebellion against the body to refuse to be stimulated by anything involving male anatomy maybe just the dodgy wiring. Either way it used to seriously wig us out. Receiving oral was almost traumatic even though I couldn't explain it apart from by being a freak ofc.

Thus far I'm not sexually engaged in any way a hug and kiss has been max interaction with anyone (including myself lol) since Oct'15. So it's not a very high bar for a relationship with a guy to reach the same level as my marriage right now which is interesting to say the least. Could just be on an emotional level or need to feel safe but my spidersense says it might be more.

Suppose until I'm fixed and grow up enough to fantasise I won't really know but as I now have no actual programming I am open to everything I guess. Just now I'm a total party girl though always dying to get dolled up, go out, drink and dance til dawn for which a part of that isn't me hunting but wanting to be hunted!!!

It's really funny how different I am when I compare what others expect of me after knowing him for decades that nothing should surprise me.

Ah well time to grab my gear and drag my fat ass to the gym for 07.30 to start work on my 2017 bikini body

I'm like Jenny I identify totally as a lesbian. While I have been with a few men in the past. I never enjoyed it and frankly could never figure out why I did it. Now I think that in my own twisted heterosexual way that it was my way of being a women. 'cause you know women are with men.  I've thought about it since starting transitioning and have even thought of trying to meet some men and just couldn't bring myself to do it. I generally don't find men attractive and certainly not in any kind of sexual way. I just don't really have any interest in it and I'm sure that won't change.

Our minds can be far cleverer than we ever realised.

I'm currently fascinated by my own interest in possibilities. Much like the rest of you I was 100% sure I was interested in women only yet despite that I also seem to be dead set on full SRS instead of my original cosmetic choice which is an interesting combo to say the least. I mean don't get me wrong I know I've changed a lot since I got back and started growing up but I kinda figured that side or me was set in stone.

The only selling point for full SRS to me remains the chance of full on penetrative sex with someone which surprises the hell out of me given what I thought I knew about me. Financially not a big difference but the time commitment to maintain my new vag is insanely huge which means my need must be far greater to be prepared to do it. Thus far life without sexual activity has been good so like why mess with it at all is a good question. Suppose it could be for completeness in so far as I should be able to do anything the same as any other woman except bear children.

Psych side: Perhaps the desire to keep options open is simply a result of my insecurities with my wife combined with the desire to be desired.

Fun and frustrating being your own shrink at times.

Either way it looks like my world is potentially getting a little more complicated once I remove the sex block in my mind. The 9th of Feb can't come quick enough...

Yes, I will admit that I do know people that have changed their preference as they got further into their transition. One trans-woman I know said that she just simply wanted to be the woman in the relationship. So who knows. You never know how life will go until you get further down the road towards true womanhood.


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HI girls,
   I'm with you on the vaginal penetration Jerrica... I do want that option at least that's how I feel at the moment. Although I strongly believe that it won't ever be by a man. perhaps a SO with a strap on or maybe a trans girl but that's about it. I read a sex study once and it found that the majority of lesbian respondents said they never had sex with vaginal penetration.  But who knows everything the future might bring. I know trans women change their orientation some times but I don't see it happening for me. I once thought of myself as Bi or maybe Bi-curious. Now that I've starting transitioning I no longer do. I completely identify as a lesbian.

As you've probably seen on FB I saw the gender Psychiatrist. It went great. he's going to do a referral for me to another Psychiatrist to confirm the gender Dysphoria. It takes two letters for funding and surgery here. Then I will see him again after that. I also need to get the psychologist I saw to write a letter of what she did with me and her findings or whatever.  He said to apply to the government for funding I have to have 1 yr of real life experience that's documented. I'm hoping I will be able to go from the date I first saw the Psychologist and when I asked him he said possibly. Even if we go from when I changed my name and gender markers. I could start the process of applying for funding sooner then later. So, her letter is pretty important.

The other thing(s) I got from him is two carry letters and also a letter to update my passport. One carry letter is a short 1 or 2 line thing and the other is a paragraph that just says more about me being transgender and that I'm transitioning. I got so emotional standing there as he signed the letters I almost started to cry. It's super exciting.

Yeah options kinda sums it up y'know like if they offered us bluetooth and Dolby 5.1 we'd probably take it as even though we might not use it just now we might some day.

Great news with the psych and sorry to hear bout the car.
Fingers crossed for as early a recorded date as possible lucky you have your paper trail to nail them down if they get sneaky.

I don't really know about the carry letter thing but glad you've got them anyway.

Yay you 

I'm still questioning myself over full tbh and my bottom line keeps coming back to just keeping options open.

Realistically I kinda have to as even after an on the spot chat with SO about why I'm doing full there was no real response. In fairness even if she then pledged her undying love etc I'd still be getting full as I wouldn't believe her and she knows she'd be lying too. That said she was as honest as she can be which is to say she has no idea how things are going to turn out and none of us can do better than that right now. We might stay together but she's 100% straight apparently (talked a good lesbian game in the past so that kinda caught me out) so y'know it's complicated at best.

Suppose I'm still intimidated at the time cost to my life of dilating forever versus never having to.
Does anyone really dilate just for pleasure?
Even an hour a week would be 52 hours which is losing more than 2 days a year (3 and a quarter days if only awake for 16 hours).

I've heard legends of it being a pleasure rather than a chore which is tempting yet scary in itself.
I still remember being possessed by the animal need to get off in order to get back into my head for a short period of time.
Maybe I'm scared of craving sexual stimulation like that again in which case I'll pass. Hell I can't even resist junk food at least with sex not on the menu there's nothing to resist lol.

Think I might have to do something really really silly and try to remove the last mind block before I go to Thailand to do some tests and get some answers.

Ok that's too scary - Less dangerous I'm going to trawl the net for champions of cosmetic for information.

Basically so far I reckon it's sex with guys equals full as all guys gotta do what they do.
Don't imagine having a proper relationship with a guy without them having sex.
At the risk of being crude from their standpoint if they can't screw you you're not a real woman to them.

Despite a massive library of lesbian porn in my head I can't really think of any intimacy with another woman either.
Could be a side effect of the block as even "reviewing" stuff in my head I don't even flicker.

Sigh - I'm going in circles again with full being safest it has to be the choice.

Dilation is about half an hour a session once you are down to one dilator. About 5 minutes prep time, 20 minutes in the act and 5 minutes clean up time. Some get by with dilation once very two or three week however i maintain a weekly schedule so I don't get them spaced out to much. I was a bad girl and missed dilation for 10 years but all it took was several weeks of twice weekly to get things back in shape.