Hi there,
Three months ago my girlfriend had SRS with Dr.Brassard. Having finally reached the point where it's safe to have 'intercourse' (or for us, vag-vag sex) we finally gave it a try. Unfortunately, I was a very disappointed by the experience, and am currently questioning whether or not I'll even be able to stay with her post-op. There aren't a lot of resources that give you a clear idea of what to expect from a post-op vagina in the long term and so right now I'm trying to figure out if my concerns are just temporary or not. I love my partner very much, but if I'm no longer attracted to that part of her then it would be best for us to break up, and hopefully stay friends. I know for some people they love their partner regardless of their bodies, but for me I care very much about my partner's body AND mind. I don't really think that one way is better than the other, but I just wanted to point how it works for me, as I have experienced some disapproval from people telling me that if I really loved my partner I would stay with her regardless of her body (of course if this really held true then we'd all be bisexual/pansexual:P)
Anyways, I really really want things to work out between us, so I'm hoping that I can share my concerns with people and get some honest feedback:)
Some of my concern is about the cosmetic appearance of her vulva. I'm a very visual person and I think my partner has a beautiful body, but that part of her really isn't very pretty (at this point). She's still quite puffy, especially along the incision lines, which surprises me since at the hospital they gave the impression that most of the swelling would be gone by 3 months. Of course there are also the scars, although from everything I've heard, these will mostly go away with time. Her inner labia are very small, and bright red. I'm guessing that eventually they'll become a normal flesh colour, but I'm really not sure. Her vagina currently seems like a hole..what I mean by this is that most vaginas (or at least, those I've seen, including my own) tend to fold up when not 'in use' so you can't really see them, but for her, there's a hole that's quite clearly there..Her clit is basically not visible, although apparently when aroused it gets bigger? Overall, it didn't look very attractive, and she definitely looked a bit wounded. She's only 3 months post-op so maybe it's all just a matter of time, but considering that I've read from a few sources that the vulva is close to its final form at 3months, I worry a bit. I also don't know what exactly to expect in the long-term since all the pics on the Anne Lawrence site (and other sites) seem to be a few months, as opposed to a few years, post-op.
The rest of my concern is with the fact that her vulva smells and tastes very strongly (and not in a good way...) This was actually such a turn-off that I had to stop licking her when we tried having sex...Once again, this might just be an issue with it still healing, but considering that they said it's alright to have sex at 3months, I guess I wasn't expecting so many problems..
If I could get some feedback from people who have had SRS with Brassard I would appreciate it immensely!