I went to see Erin and bare my soul. I tried to tell her everything I felt and that I loved her and wanted nothing more than to be with her, but the words wouldn't come out. She was cold, distant, couldn't look me in the eyes. She was figety and moved around the apartment alot as if she was doing anything she could to avoid me. She has never been this way to me before. It felt like she and I were never in a relationship at all, at least on her end. It wasn't even like being with Erin. It felt like being with a stranger. Before I left, I cried and she said nothing but, "I think what I need right now is a bestest friend. I need to focus on me right now." That's it. her. Before I left, she looked in my eyes and said, "I love you, you know."
The pictures of me were still up on her wall. The necklace I had made at the jewelry store for her was still hanging up. I left tonight feeling like I had no idea what she was feeling. We have been apart for 16 days since this whole break up took place. How could she just up and stop loving me just like that? I still love her with every part of me. I don't know where to go from here. She is the person I want to spend my life loving, but I don't know how to find out where I stand with her. What should I do now?