I think it's time to get those thinking caps on and... GO!!! 8)
Hugs
I'm thinking about thinking about thinking about recursion and how you need to first understand recursion to understand recursion
Someone or something is giving a guy I know some ideas about my past. He said something to someone (not knowing I would hear it) about not seeing me as "any less of a man."I don't think he plans on asking for details, he seems to be waiting for me to open up to him. And while I appreciate that, if he is being honest, he doesn't see me as less of a man... I'm not happy with the fact that he seems to be catching on. I feel like someone who knows us both mutually let something slip. I'm kind of beating myself up honestly...I know he saw my bra strap a while back, so I'm beating myself up for not being more cautious about that. I also feel like telling that girl that might have let something slip was a mistake. I told her because I had ulterior motives of getting in her pants, and I wanted to be forthright about my issue. But she never reciprocated my feelings, so telling her served zero purpose - I feel like I should have scoped her out more carefully. Had I gotten to know her better, I'd know she isn't the best at keeping confidential stuff confidential.
What scares me is that my transition is an extremely sensitive spot for me. The fear of being outed, or actually being outed, has triggered some very serious mental health relapses for me. Can I just say what I want to do? I want to quit my job, block everyone that I've met in the last 6 months from my cellphone, and never speak to any of them again. Maybe break a bunch of ->-bleeped-<- in my bedroom. Start fresh. But that would be really bad for me too, to be isolated.
I'm so so stupid for not being more guarded, and for getting too comfortable. And I'm so stupid for trusting that woman so quickly. She has only good intentions and it isn't out of malice, but she just sucks at keeping things to herself. Maybe it wasn't her though, he could have heard it from other places if he went digging deep enough. *sigh*
I wish I could finally get over this damn social anxiety buisness and go be me. Instead of spending yet another night, a Saturday at that, all by my lonesome. Thank goodness for the internet. This modern world of ours sure makes being an introvert easier on the soul.
One of these days that little show off loudmouth I was as a kid is gonna come bursting out the doors. When that happens, look out world!
i'm thinking about how life would be a lot more fascinating if there was background music, like in the movies. :)
Just woke from a series of pretty awful dreams. Hope you are all safe and well. *hugs*
Talked to my sister, found out she is seriously thinking about moving to Queensland next year.
Now that she's mentioned it, I'm seriously thinking about moving up there also. It is where most of our family is
Currently thinking about where to go with my life and what do I want out of it. Pondering my true gender as well.
Quote from: antonia on February 21, 2015, 04:29:15 PM
I'm thinking about thinking about thinking about recursion and how you need to first understand recursion to understand recursion
I think I prefer doing things iteratively instead of recursively :)
You are so serial in your nature, get with the parallel crowd, just be sure not to get mixed up with the multi-threading people, they have deadlocks and race conditions.
Quote from: Anna++ on February 23, 2015, 05:39:52 PM
I think I prefer doing things iteratively instead of recursively :)
I like cheese.
Quote from: antonia on February 23, 2015, 07:53:00 PM
You are so serial in your nature, get with the parallel crowd, just be sure not to get mixed up with the multi-threading people, they have deadlocks and race conditions.
I'm a Linux kernel maintainer, so I've already moved into multi-threading land...
Quote from: Jill F on February 23, 2015, 07:55:02 PM
I like cheese.
I'll have a cheddar ready next week :)
You know you are not supposed to say that out-loud, you might get swarmed with geeks wanting to date you.
Quote from: Anna++ on February 23, 2015, 08:03:54 PM
I'm a Linux kernel maintainer, so I've already moved into multi-threading land...
Quote from: antonia on February 23, 2015, 08:22:08 PM
You know you are not supposed to say that out-loud, you might get swarmed with geeks wanting to date you.
Too bad that I'm already seeing somebody :)
But you don't have to warn me... This creepy guy kept following me around at LinuxCon last August. I later heard other people complain that he got antagonistic during a presentation he attended.
i'm thinking about sleep...(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fcommons%2F8%2F83%2FZzz.gif&hash=9f0d5f95a7ba87e3edb1b6de65f46e571ecf9ec4)
I had an interesting experience at PyCon last year, no wonder most of the girls dress down to t-shirts and baggy pants.
Quote from: Anna++ on February 23, 2015, 08:34:48 PM
Too bad that I'm already seeing somebody :)
But you don't have to warn me... This creepy guy kept following me around at LinuxCon last August. I later heard other people complain that he got antagonistic during a presentation he attended.
Quote from: antonia on February 23, 2015, 08:41:05 PM
I had an interesting experience at PyCon last year, no wonder most of the girls dress down to t-shirts and baggy pants.
Maybe! But to be fair, I usually wear t-shirts (even when I'm not at conferences)...
I just investigated a weird sound in my bathroom. I wonder how long I've been sharing a toothbrush with my cat...?
Quote from: Anna++ on February 23, 2015, 08:03:54 PM
I'll have a cheddar ready next week :)
I could so make nachos. Blessed are the cheesemakers!
Quote from: Jill F on February 23, 2015, 09:09:24 PM
I could so make nachos. Blessed are the cheesemakers!
I am currently eating nachos lol
Quote from: Jill F on February 23, 2015, 09:09:24 PMBlessed are the cheesemakers!
"Life of Brian" refference?
Also, I miss eating cheese...
Cheetos!!!!
Quote from: Kellam on February 23, 2015, 10:06:27 PM
"Life of Brian" refference?
Also, I miss eating cheese...
1) Monty Python rules
2) So does cheese
What rules are there about cheese that even Monty Python could screw up?
Quote from: LordKAT on February 24, 2015, 01:44:15 AM
What rules are there about cheese that even Monty Python could screw up?
I've got nothing...
"In a nutshell. And I thought to myself, 'a little fermented curd will do the trick', so, I curtailed my Walpoling activites, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles!"
"Come again?"
"I want to buy some cheese."
speak plainly then, I've cheddar, brie, montery jack, Parmesan, colby, mozerella, feta, etc.
Warning: The etc. is a bit on the pricey side.
When do the excuses of "I'm busy I have this to do and that to do" turn from truth.
To "Daughter I don't approve I don't want to see you again".?
I'm sorry mum you have know for almost a year now please accept reality or tell me what you think!
The policlinics that deal with trans folk's HRTs here are probably the only places where it's not a weird thought that a man has had a hysterectomy.
I'm finished watching the Let's Plays of Metal Gear Solid 1, 2, 3, 4, so now I am ready to engage in online with others about the best and worst game inside my head. Seriously, Wolrd of Longplays aren't for the faint at heart......
My obnoxiously loud next door neighbor is reminding me in his own little way that I really should play my electric guitar more often 8)
Quote from: Anna++ on February 23, 2015, 09:07:16 PM
Maybe! But to be fair, I usually wear t-shirts (even when I'm not at conferences)...
I just investigated a weird sound in my bathroom. I wonder how long I've been sharing a toothbrush with my cat...?
Cats, not cat. And the whole darn time! >:-)
Apparently when you buy produce, "organic" just means you pay extra for the privilege of cleaning the bugs off of it.
You're supposed to eat those, Jill, not wash them off! How else are vegans gonna get enough protein? [emoji14]
I'm thinking, there is a lot of bad information out on the internet. I don't know of any way to warn people of it without seeming.....like a negative person all around.
so... much... work... to... do... :P
Why isn't lemonade served with a lime on the edge of the glass?
Quote from: Anna++ on February 25, 2015, 06:35:14 PM
Why isn't lemonade served with a lime on the edge of the glass?
I don't know, but from now on that is how I'll take mine, sounds delicious. How about limeade with a wedge of lemmon?
Thinking "because they're intolerant" is the right answer.
Quote from: Anna++ on February 25, 2015, 06:35:14 PM
Why isn't lemonade served with a lime on the edge of the glass?
I don't know, but margaritas are. Hmm... I'm thinking it's Mexican food tonight.
Tequila- el desayuno de los campiones.
Im thinking in order to do this right I have to lose some weight first, diet starts on Monday. Maybe I can post my progress in hopes I can get some encouragement. I need all the help I can get.
Get a buddy, someone you are always honest with, don't step on the scale every day, do it every week (daily fluctuations will get you down), tell the buddy everything you have done, exercising, the time you really wanted a burger and fries but got a salad, etc. If you lie to your buddy your diet is over.
Never buy unhealthy things at the store, make it so that if you want ice-cream or chocolate you have to go to the store to get it, stock up on carrots, celery, tzatziki sauce, soy sauce, tuna, chicken breasts and other things you might crave but are healthy.
Exercise every day, it does not have to be much, but make it a routine, if it's walking 1 mile, that's awesome,, if it's cycling 25 power to you, the trick is to start and do it every day and then see if you want to add to it.
I guess I should add I went from 250lbs to 160lbs :)
Quote from: stephee72 on February 25, 2015, 08:57:42 PM
Im thinking in order to do this right I have to lose some weight first, diet starts on Monday. Maybe I can post my progress in hopes I can get some encouragement. I need all the help I can get.
This support group isn't all it's cracked up to be. Sigh, I never wanted to leave as fast as I did today and I refused to speak about sex and dating.
I'm thinking tacos
If you ever need a yin/yang perspective on life please share or message, I hate politics, love problem solving, have a big shoulder to lean on and most of the time make an ass of myself before you can.
Quote from: DragonBeer on February 25, 2015, 10:22:52 PM
This support group isn't all it's cracked up to be. Sigh, I never wanted to leave as fast as I did today and I refused to speak about sex and dating.
I should start posting in the FtM section, but usually, I have no experience in the questions being asked, or the topic is too triggering for me.
Had my last meeting with my client today after 2 hard years they said they will miss me.
Moving on to another role with new challenges.
I will miss them as well. It's been a hard but a rewarding relationship.
I moved mountains rebuilt bridges and did the impossible.
It feels odd.
Deep fried Mars bars are sooooo wrong. Yet they are oh sooooo worth it.
Plus I should of put more sunscreen on today, I think I got a tad burnt on the walk there and back to deep fried heaven
I'm going to Boston for a conference in a little over a week. I hope the city thaws out between now and then!
Not a chance! All the snow is filthy black now, too. Brace yourself and bring rubbers.
Everyone get your minds out of the gutter! :laugh:
Yeah, in a week it will be a slushy, sloppy, grody, late winter filthy mess here. Puddles everywhere! It is getting warmer in general though. We're at the point where high 30 to low 40 degree days are reffered to as "so nice out".
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on February 27, 2015, 11:00:13 AM
Not a chance! All the snow is filthy black now, too. Brace yourself and bring rubbers.
Everyone get your minds out of the gutter! :laugh:
I have my winter boots, but they're a pain to get on and off so I might not wear them through the TSA screening...
i like to think of myself as an observer of my own life. like, every moment ive ever lived, and have yet to live, already exist, and im just experiencing these moments in a linear fashion.
thinking this way makes my current place in life very interesting. things arent so great right now, im as broke as can be and terrified of transitioning. but this is just one moment on the timeline. a year ago i would never even dare to come to a website like this. now here i am. where am i a year from now? i'll have to wait to find out. i have a feeling i'll have a lot less testosterone by then...
thats what ive been thinking about lately
Quote from: sonson on February 27, 2015, 03:41:10 PM
i like to think of myself as an observer of my own life. like, every moment ive ever lived, and have yet to live, already exist, and im just experiencing these moments in a linear fashion.
thinking this way makes my current place in life very interesting. things arent so great right now, im as broke as can be and terrified of transitioning. but this is just one moment on the timeline. a year ago i would never even dare to come to a website like this. now here i am. where am i a year from now? i'll have to wait to find out. i have a feeling i'll have a lot less testosterone by then...
thats what ive been thinking about lately
I'm right there with you. Broke, no fixed adress and scared. But exited and happy too.
Ok, I'm off to go come out to my best friends. They "get" to be the first. The good part is, if all goes well I will have an adress when I get back to my house sitting gig tonight. If it all goes wrong, I lose my oldest and dearest friends. I don't see any other way but this, so whatever happens happens.
I haven't watched T.V. in a while, but I'm watching MMA and Boxing now. I wanted to see if The Big Bang Theory was on, but it is not, so fighting sports will do....and I have some Kombacha (SP?) tea, which will really make things interesting. I feel so manly! I'm going to watch Hardcore Pawn between commercials.
Quote from: Kellam on February 27, 2015, 04:19:43 PM
I'm right there with you. Broke, no fixed adress and scared. But exited and happy too.
Ok, I'm off to go come out to my best friends. They "get" to be the first. The good part is, if all goes well I will have an adress when I get back to my house sitting gig tonight. If it all goes wrong, I lose my oldest and dearest friends. I don't see any other way but this, so whatever happens happens.
good luck! I hope everything went well with your friends. either way, good for you for coming out to them. I hope to feel comfortable enough to come out to my friends soon.
Thank you so much sonson, it all went swimmingly, couldn't have gone any better!
My sister was all excited when she saw the size on some of my cloathing, as she will be able to borrow cloathes.
This is something I'm use to, growing up if I couldn't find any of my cloathes. My sisters where always prime suspects one and two never my brother
I rode my nephew's kick scooter today and it was so much fun! I was like over 100 over the weight limit, but it still rode relatively fine for me. I was too scared to serious attempt tricks on it, but I just like the ride. At first glance, I was happy that I didn't buy an adult version, because I had some balance issues at first, especially with plans of possibly going to a skatepark, but now, even since that park is closed, if I had the option to go and buy a scooter for it, I still would ave strongly considered it. I may never be some awesome xtreme person that can do awesome tricks, but I would like to be the guy that just rides. Riding a kick scooter takes a lot of stamina too. Going uphill became a killer. There's no way I would take that thing and ride it long distance if there were several uphills. Riding down them sure would be fun though, if the cracks and bumps were not that bad. I would ride it on flat land with minimal hills. I still might buy a scooter one day, just to ride in the house, but I cannot mentally justify buying one at this time, especially since I'm trying to curb my spending habits....
Thanks Antonia, good advice. I am way up there, bout 320, lookin to drop over 100 lbs, gonna take time but I have to. Depression makes me eat, not being who I sho j ld makes me depressed, tough cycle I need to break.
It's kind of amusing how my air filter is rating my farts.
I was thinking that Jill should adapt her life story into a movie if there's any way it could be done correctly. It sounds like she has the connections to make it happen.
Noticed a lot of emphasis in the more complicated version of Chinese astrology lately so I checked it out. Seems I'm a yin earth pig. Earth pig? Good grief, I'm a female (yin) aardvark!
I'm finally going to do it... I'm going to start reading the 4th Song of Ice and Fire book sometime this week!
I wonder if it's possible to look like Johnny Depp. :o
Quote from: DragonBeer on March 01, 2015, 02:10:05 PM
I wonder if it's possible to look like Johnny Depp. :o
..but do you really want to?
Quote from: DragonBeer on March 01, 2015, 02:10:05 PM
I wonder if it's possible to look like Johnny Depp. :o
Quote from: LordKAT on March 01, 2015, 02:37:20 PM
..but do you really want to?
Well Johnny c.21 Jump Street was kind of cute
Quote from: DragonBeer on March 01, 2015, 02:10:05 PM
I wonder if it's possible to look like Johnny Depp. :o
You mean like I used to?
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi688.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv246%2FKeairaElisabeth%2FKeaira%2FOld%2520ME_zpsxpcvjeub.jpg&hash=7101d335142e43746cc89281a6f4c7fad3065c49)
Trust me, being told you look like a celebrity gets old pretty quick. -_-
Talim, lol.. Thats pretty funny..Glad to see your much prettier now. See that was the problem you looked like johnny Depp and now you corrected the problem to look like the real you.
Quote from: stephee72 on March 01, 2015, 04:36:39 PM
Talim, lol.. Thats pretty funny..Glad to see your much prettier now. See that was the problem you looked like johnny Depp and now you corrected the problem to look like the real you.
Thank you. ^_^
I guess now we know what Johnny Depp would look like after transition. :p
Ever seen office Space? The scenes with the character named Michael Bolton? It was a lot like that. Lol.
Watching Game of Thrones for the first time. How did I miss this?!!
Quote from: Talim on March 01, 2015, 06:36:00 PM
Watching Game of Thrones for the first time. How did I miss this?!!
Enjoy! They did a really good job with the TV series.
My cat just tried licking olive oil off of a wheel of parmesean... Can cats even have olive oil?
Quote from: Anna++ on March 01, 2015, 07:25:33 PM
My cat just tried licking olive oil off of a wheel of parmesean... Can cats even have olive oil?
LOL... Cats do wacky things, a little olive oil might be good for it :) I love cheese
Quote from: V M on March 01, 2015, 07:36:10 PM
LOL... Cats do wacky things, a little olive oil might be good for it :) I love cheese
The parmesean needs to age another 9 months, so I won't know for a while if the cat affected the cheese in any way.
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 01, 2015, 07:48:19 AM
I was thinking that Jill should adapt her life story into a movie if there's any way it could be done correctly. It sounds like she has the connections to make it happen.
Now THAT would be the most boring movie of all time! It would probably need to be embellished significantly. Maybe I should give myself super powers or slay vampires or something?
The Jillster awoke before noon. She put her boots on. She grabbed a soda from the ancient drink fridge, and walked on down the hall...
*snore*
Oh well, it's nice to be back home.
Talim,
Johnny Depp does like eye shadow and guyliner soo.. Ofice space Micheal Bolton..yes...very funny. As for Game of Thrones not seen it yet, just been sitin around watchin netflix and old movies. Got to get a look at that show. Barely watchin TV except on Thursday, love Blacklist.
I just realized that my landscape contractor was a serious rock star in the '80s. Oddly enough, the singer/songwriter from that same band (who is infinitely more famous) is whose place my go-to general contractor went to after he left here an hour ago.
Small world much?
Cough it up Jill, my curiosity is killing me
I have to wait 3 weeks to speak to someone about a gender marker letter...
Just found the perfect dip to go with broccoli and carrots, powdered onion soup and yoghurt, healthy and yummy
Great idea for my diet starting tommorrow, i like it.
Enough already. Please.
Quote from: Anna++ on March 01, 2015, 07:25:33 PM
My cat just tried licking olive oil off of a wheel of parmesean... Can cats even have olive oil?
I was told by a vet once to put olive oil in my cat's food to add calories and help his coat, but he never liked it so I don't try anymore.
I was thinking that I should update my profile pic here and keep up with my messages better, but I see so many people gone that I feel good for at least sticking around. My tracfone doesn't take decent pictures anyhow, and I check my messages here more often than I check my email.
I'm thinking now about people I left behind. I bumbled into some music tonight that pushed all the nostalgia buttons and I'm wondering how everyone is. I'm not really capable yet of being very social or making time for others, so it's probably best to just keep plowing through daily life and avoiding complication.
I have to get ready for work soon.
Getting interviewed to work for the Duck tomorrow, wish me luck! AFLAAAC!
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 04, 2015, 12:58:27 PM
Getting interviewed to work for the Duck tomorrow, wish me luck! AFLAAAC!
I wish you all the duck in the world.
Quote from: Jill F on March 04, 2015, 01:01:41 PM
I wish you all the duck in the world.
You're quacking me up!
You are all quackers. Ducks who say AFLAAC are unique.
Outside of that. Good luck.
Quote from: LordKAT on March 04, 2015, 01:18:03 PM
You are all quackers. Ducks who say AFLAAC are unique.
Outside of that. Good luck.
Not only that, they're Gilbert Gottfried, and thank you all. Next week,... the postal service. There's a lame duck for you.
The Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain Collector's Edition absolutely sucks. I was hoping for a statue, and a soundtrack AT LEAST..... I don't care for a map, a replica hand, some fancy packaging, the behind the scenes and trailers cd, and some DLC I was ready to drop some serious cash down for the CE too. Looks like I will just be getting the day one edition.
I probably should be sleeping right now
Why on earth did I finish that bottle of red last night, my head ....
Quote from: antonia on March 05, 2015, 09:37:35 AM
Why on earth did I finish that bottle of red last night, my head ....
A good bottle must always be finished that night. A great bottle finished shared.
Drink lots of water and take the strongest painkiller you can get. The weekend is coming up soon
I'm wondering why I just went and looked up Prime Suspect 3. It is the eppisode of that classic show that depicts trans folk in the worst possible light. I wasn't even sure of it existing but I remember the impact it had on me back then. It convinced me as a teen that I was a terrible person for being this way. That if I followed my heart I would end up a dead prostitute or some confused, unlikeable pathetic joke. This eppisode has haunted the back of my mind for 20 plus years.
I'm going back to youtube to watch more trans by def videos... That should cheer me up!
Thanks I'm much better now :)
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 05, 2015, 02:53:01 PM
A good bottle must always be finished that night. A great bottle finished shared.
Drink lots of water and take the strongest painkiller you can get. The weekend is coming up soon
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 05, 2015, 02:53:01 PM
A good bottle must always be finished that night. A great bottle finished shared.
Drink lots of water and take the strongest painkiller you can get. The weekend is coming up soon
Perfect hangover prevention: drink a full Gatorade before bed
Water pipes are meant to move water, not freeze up and keep it so that you can hurt your back when you finally get a weekend off. A busy weekend even without pipe problems.
I woke up missing a fingernail....only to find it under my boob when I was trying to give it some air.
I wished it would've been easier
Instead of any longer
I wished I could've stood
Where you would've been proud
That won't happen now
That won't happen now
There's a whole lot of singing
That's never gonna be heard
Disappearing every day
Without so much as a word somehow
I'm sick of having to keep downloading GTA V: Online updates, especially when every time I play there is no one in the lobby, or the people dissapear when I get there. These downloads eat up precious memory.....memory that I am going to need when I play the next Metal Gear Solid V game. I'm going to do this final download, and if I have this problem again, I will give up on playing GTA V: Online. Even IF it manage to work, my stupid internet will kick me out anyway because I have crappy internet service. I hate that this has to happen to ME!
Should I grow my hair out or just get a haircut...?
I'm thinking about a dream I had where I came out as trans (pre-everything) and lost everyone except my professors. My SO (which was a surprise in and of itself) freaked out, didn't believe me and ignored me completely afterwords, and I lost my only friend that I had made just recently with whom I was able to finally be myself and share some deep/personal conversations (which I have never been able to do). I'm still a little sad.
Wow I'm really cold right now and I can't seem to warm up. Maybe I'll start up my old laptop with a resting temp of 120C and set it on my feet. That thing throws off heat like crazy. It would just be good to stop shivering. I think I'll go make some coffee or something.
So Im on a diet... Is vodka low calorie its been a long day. :P
Hmm, if they made low calorie alcohol of any variety, they would have a gold mine.
Quote from: stephee72 on March 06, 2015, 09:10:55 PM
So Im on a diet... Is vodka low calorie its been a long day. :P
Two bottles a night, and my weight's just right.
I kid, that would be way too much vodka (It'll happen one day) but I can honestly say I have never gained weight whilst drinking vodka. And I mean, I can eat half a house one night, but as long as I also get drunk off my skull, I'll wake up having maintained or even lost weight in the morning, no vomitting involved!
Ed Sheeran also made note of the fact that when he was losing weight, he just stopped drinking beer and picked up the vodka!
The only complex carbohydrate in vodka is the alcohol and yes, the alcohol counts. About 100 calories per shot according to the program I used to use for recording. A single beer is much worse.
Once again I almost wrote "a single bear", but that's way too many calories, fatty meat, you know.
Well then, knowing it's complex carbs makes me understand why I would not gain weight, being that I am 90% of the time living on a ketogenic-like diet.
I wonder if consuming a single bear would have the same affect..?
I could never be vegan. Vegetarian might be possible but never vegan.
Im getting better at eating veggies on my diet but could never go veggie all the the time, I really enjoy meat. On that note though vodka would be in a vegan diet...made of potatoes right....
I'm fairly sure it's made of grains usually these days, but yeah some vodka is made of potatoes.
I should really pay more attention to make sure I'm getting the potato vodka..
Quote from: Tripdistrans on March 07, 2015, 09:07:10 PM
I'm fairly sure it's made of grains usually these days, but yeah some vodka is made of potatoes.
I should really pay more attention to make sure I'm getting the potato vodka..
If it isn't potato vodka I don't waste my time. There are a lot of good ones and they're not all that expensive.
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 07, 2015, 09:41:31 PM
If it isn't potato vodka I don't waste my time. There are a lot of good ones and they're not all that expensive.
Our local shop sells 2 750mL bottles of crappy tasting vodka for $18, so I literally buy four and they're gone in two or three days.
I'm just thinking though like I've got celiac disease maybe I should pay attention to what alcohol I'm drinking hmm..
Why do I fiend for refried beans every time I go on my progesterone cycle?
I signed up for OKCupid on Valentines day out of curiosity.
I've talked to a few people, mostly guys.
Now I have self proclaimed straight GGs checking out my profile, why?
Should I just go outside in what I'm wearing, flats and a maxi dress, to get my bike wheel to fix from the basement? Yesterday when I covered up to do the same thing I felt lousy. When I went out wearing my headband and cozy sweater, first time with no men's clothing, I felt pretty good... The only people I might encounter on my way are two gay men and an old lady who is very sweet and extremely liberal...
I'm at this wonderfully wierd crossroad where the only men's clothing I wear out is my old jacket and even that is starting to feel stranger than normal. I'm nowhere near passing but I am so unhappy in men's clothes...
I'm eating lunch at the airport while waiting for my flight ... Boston here I come!
Anna,
Lord knows they dont feed you on flights anymore, not that it was good food. Enjoy your flight and time in Boston.
I'm thinking that I am very grateful for my counselor. I don't think she realizes how much she has helped me, especially lately. These last two weeks have been really difficult for me, and I was on the verge of returning to some self-destructive behaviour again. I was really scared of my emotions. But she helped me turn it into something productive rather than destructive. I figured out some of what was leading me to spiral. I talked to my boss about something that was bothering me, and we had a good discussion and we have a plan moving forward. I opened up to my professors about the struggles I was having with school, and they were all extremely supportive and we are working on a plan to get me through the material. I also found two very positive and effective coping mechanisms, that have helped me manage when my emotions are in a really bad place.
And in sorting out those things, I managed to get a lot of smaller things back on track without realizing it. I have to follow a diet plan before surgery as per my doctor, and I actually managed to get it up and running and I am doing very well with it. I got my taxes and doctor's stuff sorted out so I don't have to worry about money now.
This is entirely, 100% unheard of for me. Normally, when something bad happens, and I can't control my feelings, I make things worse. In the past, I'd have either quit or sabotaged my job, I'd have sabotaged my schooling and academic relationships, and rather than using positive coping to help I'd have done things that I know are upsetting and hurtful to myself. And I certainly wouldn't have gotten my taxes done or stayed on track with my surgery requirements. I have NEVER turned such a negative time into such a positive. Before it seemed like it was only a dream, you know? A fantasy world. But this time it actually happened.
Thinking I need Caleb's therapist.
i want some food.
Quote from: stephee72 on March 08, 2015, 01:19:28 PM
Anna,
Lord knows they dont feed you on flights anymore, not that it was good food. Enjoy your flight and time in Boston.
The flight attendant gave me a small bag of mini-pretzels and spilled a bit of ginger ale on my book. Fortunately, I was able to wipe up the spill fairly quickly.
Quote from: Anna++ on March 08, 2015, 04:32:30 PM
The flight attendant gave me a small bag of mini-pretzels and spilled a bit of ginger ale on my book. Fortunately, I was able to wipe up the spill fairly quickly.
The sun came out awhile ago, it must have been when you got here! :)
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 08, 2015, 04:35:24 PM
The sun came out awhile ago, it must have been when you got here! :)
Hugs, Devlyn
I'm taking it with me when I go home on Friday! :laugh:
Quote from: Anna++ on March 08, 2015, 04:38:23 PM
I'm taking it with me when I go home on Friday! :laugh:
You can't bring a fusion ball on an airplane! :police:
Anna,
Nice....stale pretzels and ginger ale spilled on you, last time I took a flight they lost my luggage. And to think the money we spend on flights it should be better service..lol
Have fun in Btown.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 08, 2015, 04:42:58 PM
You can't bring a fusion ball on an airplane! :police:
What if I compact it down to 3.5 ounces?
Quote from: stephee72 on March 08, 2015, 04:49:51 PM
Anna,
Nice....stale pretzels and ginger ale spilled on you, last time I took a flight they lost my luggage. And to think the money we spend on flights it should be better service..lol
Have fun in Btown.
My luggage was lost when I went to Florida a few years ago. It turned up the next day, but I still had to spend the night without a toothbrush or a change of clothes.
Are you in Boston proper (downtown) or out in the suburbs?
Anna....Lost my luggage for two days, ended up going to walmart for some clothes and toiletries. Its like come on you tagged the bag, registered it, got everyone elses stuff. What gives!!!... By the way the maker of cheese and your big smile in your pjcture always makes me smile. I assume you are from Wisconsin? I have a good friend who is, claims to be the head of cheesy. Im from Upstate NY originally moved to Texas, guess Im now the Maker of BBQ... Lol.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 08, 2015, 05:00:53 PM
Are you in Boston proper (downtown) or out in the suburbs?
Downtown, at the Revere Hotel. It's a nice hotel so far, and they even have a complimentary overnight shoe shining service (I'm giving them my boots tonight).
Quote from: stephee72 on March 08, 2015, 05:03:06 PM
By the way the maker of cheese and your big smile in your pjcture always makes me smile. I assume you are from Wisconsin?
Nah, I'm from Michigan. I just like cheese so much that I started making it at home :)
Mani pedis should not take 2 hours.
I want brownies but I don't actually want to make them.
Quote from: MattAverage on March 08, 2015, 08:05:57 PM
I want brownies but I don't actually want to make them.
that's the story of my life.
Anna,
Now thats talent, I think I was going to try and make mozzarella once, but chickened out. ;D
"Yeah I do hate work, and you should too, hate work, yeah yeah hate work, aint no joke." Getting ready for work with this punk classic on my mind.
I'm awake, I'm awake! Oh, hmm the alarm isn't going off. Did I sleep through it? *checks clock* Nope, not time to get up yet. So, do I try to get more sleep or stay up and do something. Too early to make these life altering decisions.
I actually registered to respond to something that kind of ticked me off, but then it got locked before I got done.
And yeah, not hard to figure it out by the name, >:-) -yn. lol
edit to correct a name. :laugh:
Good to hear from you, even if I'm not Devlyn.
Quote from: marsh monster on March 09, 2015, 01:11:39 PM
I actually registered to respond to something that kind of ticked me off, but then it got locked before I got done.
And yeah, not hard to figure it out by the name, Devilyn. lol
:laugh: >:-)-yn
I need to start working out again. I loved doing T-25.
Yay!!! Return of the Marsh Monster!!! 8)
Quote from: V M on March 09, 2015, 03:59:15 PM
Yay!!! Return of the Marsh Monster!!! 8)
Sequels are rarely ever as good as the original.
Im thinkin this dirt better pay off....one week is tomorrow, i will weigh myself for the first Time. Hopin it goes well
I'm thinking 7x100g, total of .7kg so 1.5lbs
Quote from: stephee72 on March 09, 2015, 07:31:16 PM
Im thinkin this dirt better pay off....one week is tomorrow, i will weigh myself for the first Time. Hopin it goes well
Forgive me hairdresser for I have sinned
I had my license photo taken before I visited you
Never again shall I make such a mistake
Thankfully it is only a replacement one and I have to go get it renewed in September
These pizza rolls are obscenely delicious.
I hope thats the result or better....and as usual its spelled wrong...not dirt......Diet
The clothing I just ordered better arrive before my 18th or I just won't be as fabulous as planned.
I'm gonna kill the guy who made the breast form I ordered. It was a damn lie.
i'm thinking that i want some chocolate.
Apparently, nothing is happening in the world other than Hillary Clinton's email.
that was some good chocolate.
Clearly this barber sucks, better look for another...
There is a reason I suffered....my diet is at one week....no soda, all water, major veggies, low cal each day and ....i lost 10lbs... ;D.honest though this is really hard, week 2 begins.... Special kudos to antonia for your continued support and ideas
I was asked if I wanted to go up to Queensland over Easter. Boss will be away then leaving me in charge during that time.
Nobody will mind if I keep the place closed and don't turn up right?
Hate it when a phone connection drops out in the middle of a conversation
was hoping opening some windows would be enough to cool the house, but nope, had to switch to ac. Oh well, helps drop the humidity too.
I hope the weather keeps up and things continue to melt. I really need to get my car unstuck from the snowbank in my driveway.
Quote from: LordKAT on March 08, 2015, 03:26:49 PM
Thinking I need Caleb's therapist.
Quote from: urchin on March 10, 2015, 12:45:45 AM
Ditto that
I think what it is is that she just is a good match for me. A lot of other therapists could never see what was actually going on, or if they did they did not have a lot of empathy for it. They looked too much at my problems rather than the emotions that were contributing to those problems and making them unmanageable. But I am really pleased with how well I have been doing, all things considered, and I am really thankful that she managed to tap into what I was needing.
-----
I really want to buy some nice bamboo towels for my bathroom. But I know family members would end up using them to clean up dog pee, to scrub something with bleach, or for something else that is gross. -_- I am slowly coming to accept that as long as I live at home I can't have nice things. Within the last month I've had my brothers stealing my shaving cream, razors, my shampoo, deodorant, my hair styling paste, my pop and snacks. I bought them for myself because I wanted to have nice things for myself, but I think I just won't buy any of those things anymore. I'll eat only the food that's in the house, use my electric razor, and just use the shampoos and deodorants that my dad brings home. It isn't like my brothers don't make money, they both have jobs and can afford to buy themselves those things if they want, or they could take some of the stuff dad takes home.
I hope I'm chosen to get paid $600 for this FTM photoshoot.
I hope Joey makes it through on this round.
Yay! Joey Cook made it through tonight. She's unique and has a very different voice than the rest.
The cheers theme song is one of the best sitcom themes ever...
Thinking "Crap, it's late!"
Quote from: stephee72 on March 11, 2015, 10:39:51 PM
The cheers theme song is one of the best sitcom themes ever...
It is, but have you ever heard the entire with 2nd & 3rd verses. There's a line in there about "And your husband wants to be a girl."
I've been sitting reading the Transgender Guidebook. I bought it today and I'm already 25% done. Awesome book. [emoji106] [emoji106]
I think I might get into running. Still not sure yet, though, but my area holds a lot of fun and charity runs in the nicer months with training beforehand so even if my treadmill does turn into an expensive coat rack I can still get some training in somewhere.
I need to get my life together....
The cute guy sitting next to me at the restaurant tonight never noticed me. *sigh* I'm 99% sure he was trans because he was binding with an ace bandage and duct tape. (Sorry, you might want to do one more button up on your shirt.) Oh well, at least he smelled nice.
I'll be sure to let everyone know if anyone's one upmanship ever actually impresses me much ::)
Quote from: V M on March 12, 2015, 03:27:56 AM
I'll be sure to let everyone know if anyone's one upmanship ever actually impresses me much ::)
A lot of people that I used to hang out with are still having silly contests all of the time, to this day. Actually, it's a sort of like "Last Person To Brag Wins, 87.0" for them.
I never understood what was so great about "bragging rights" either. WGASA?
I think I'm starting to feel ill again. Salt bath and knock out pills. Tomorrow is another day.
Writing an essay for a course about political culture. My mind is a maelstrom of thoughts right now :icon_dizzy:.
I'm thinking that I should be proof reading my book that I've decided to self publish rather than sitting here reading what people are thinking.
The hotel restaurant didn't give me a bill, and one other the servers told me that the house took care of it ... Should be be concerned that they did something to my breakfast?
Quote from: ChiGirl on March 11, 2015, 11:09:43 PM
It is, but have you ever heard the entire with 2nd & 3rd verses. There's a line in there about "And your husband wants to be a girl."
Just looked that up and you are absolutely right! I don't know how I feel about that now. I used to love that show and when they released it on Netflix I went on a watching marathon. There was an eppisode where all the guys in the bar are suspicious of some new patrons and decide to ask them to leave because they think they are gay and don't want Cheers to turn. The eppisode resolves, not with "oh, homophobia is bad and we were wrong" but with "oh those guys are straight they're just dandyish ".
Dude yelled "f*ggot" out his car window at me. For a brief moment was conflicted over whether to be pissed at the slur or excited at passing.
More coffee revealed I can be both.
I see my endo every three months and I always get nervous that something will go wrong or that I might not be meeting some expectation he has about my "worthiness". Stupid, huh?
There were visitors in our home today, with all that "nice girl" and "lady" and "you are cute" floating everywhere...
It was hell.
So hungry, no food in the house. Look like crap.
Thinking I should get in before the lock. >:-)
Chigirl,
Thats part of why I love the song...wondered if someone here knew that. Cool song either way.
I felt the very same way when a guy in a pickup truck yelled "get off the road you dike" as I was cycling here in Toronto ..... in the end I smiled
Quote from: Call me Ray on March 12, 2015, 08:57:22 AM
Dude yelled "f*ggot" out his car window at me. For a brief moment was conflicted over whether to be pissed at the slur or excited at passing.
More coffee revealed I can be both.
You actually got your bill, chopped up very fine with the eggs :P
Quote from: Anna++ on March 12, 2015, 08:09:17 AM
The hotel restaurant didn't give me a bill, and one other the servers told me that the house took care of it ... Should be be concerned that they did something to my breakfast?
I just brought a tactical knife for under $5 on Ebay. I brought it primarily for self-defense just in case someone breaks into my house. My mom is too afraid to have guns in the house, so a knife is the next best alternative for me. I hope I never have to use it for that though.
The movie 'Carrie' was on, obviously I was never a prom queen but there is so much other stuff in that film from the psycho mom to the cruel 'cool kids' at school that drudges up so many bad memories and I can feel her anger and fire
She does stand up and take her revenge in the end, but still, I cried and cried
damn you, mental illness! nobody needs your b.s.!
I wonder how much a new iPhone 4S is. Ugh...
I wish my period would just come on already. I want to get it out of the way for the month.
Do I clean my room or start writing coming out letters? Two things I have to do but don't really want to do
You could clean my room instead.
Sounds tempting I've been looking at a blank piece of paper for awhile now.
Getting sick of my parents deliberately misgendering me.
One letter down, now for my aunt's.
I don't know which one is harder, work or family?
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 14, 2015, 04:57:18 AM
One letter down, now for my aunt's.
I don't know which one is harder, work or family?
Personally, I would say work because of financial reasons.
Hmm...Amazon or eBay for iPhone....
it's snowing huge snowflakes.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.emojibase.com%2Fresources%2Fimg%2Femojis%2Fhangouts%2F2744.png&hash=2e5a1824bcfc02395dfa13ec5a68c07fd1473f2c)
Boy do I suck at makeup...then again I need a better canvas.
Holy cow, it is pouring out!
I managed to clean my bathroom, yay. There was a lot of crap in there, I'm giving some of it away to people who can use it. Now, what next...
Quote from: birkin on March 14, 2015, 05:03:12 PM
I managed to clean my bathroom, yay. There was a lot of crap in there, I'm giving some of it away to people who can use it. Now, what next...
Usually I flush my crap down the toilet, but I'm guessing your going to put it on someone's porch and light it on fire? :D Lol jk
Day after hangover day, and there's not even anything to eat in my house.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5fZu-1bt6Y
Poor crab.....
Quote from: King Malachite on March 14, 2015, 05:14:50 PM
Usually I flush my crap down the toilet, but I'm guessing your going to put it on someone's porch and light it on fire? :D Lol jk
lmao! I didn't catch that one. :P
Quote from: birkin on March 14, 2015, 07:26:23 PM
lmao! I didn't catch that one. :P
I just have a lot of time on my hands.... :P
Quote from: DragonBeer on March 14, 2015, 12:35:09 PM
Personally, I would say work because of financial reasons.
Hmm...Amazon or eBay for iPhone....
True but the work letter was relatively short, he sees me every day. My aunts will cover everything, (who I am the difference between sexuality and gender. My family dramas a bit of why I'm trans. My sexuality), it will be longer. Still don't know what one is harder.
Which phone is cheaper and which company offers faster delivery service?
I just saw Cinderella (and cried my eyes out the whole time).
I think that "Have courage and be kind." are words to live by.
funyuns and American cheese goes well together.
Grease and salt generally does go well with.......grease and salt!
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 14, 2015, 09:18:58 PM
Grease and salt generally does go well with.......grease and salt!
Touche. Sadly, I am sometimes guilty of such combinations.
Mum better hurry up and come home with some food before I starve to death.
Depression go away, I got a life to live.
Quote from: LordKAT on March 14, 2015, 11:54:46 PM
Depression go away, I got a life to live.
Hugs, you can share the tree :-*
Trying to figure out how I got bruises on the inside of my knees..
Quote from: LordKAT on March 14, 2015, 11:54:46 PM
Depression go away, I got a life to live.
Cyber hugs from me to you :icon_hug:.
I know its not much but its all that I can offer right now
Cindy, Maybe lend me a branch for a bit.
Gypsy, Thanks. It helps.
Hugs from friends, even cyber ones, are greatly appreciated. Even if I can't spell.
The whole tree is with you my brother, hug it tightly, it works.
Love you, never forget that.
Cindy
Quote from: marsh monster on March 14, 2015, 09:15:41 PM
funyuns and American cheese goes well together.
Eww, processed cheese!
Quote from: Anna++ on March 15, 2015, 09:01:07 AM
Eww, processed cheese!
See, Marsh Monster? You ruined her! Anna will never be able to unsee that.
Thank God for socks....everybody's original boobs.
Quote from: stephee72 on March 15, 2015, 11:48:57 AM
Thank God for socks....everybody's original boobs.
thank god for socks... everybody's original dick.
:)
Lol.....yes I can definitely see that too... Man they are so helpful. And my fuzzy pink ones keep me warm.
Quote from: Anna++ on March 15, 2015, 09:01:07 AM
Eww, processed cheese!
It was what I had in the fridge, finished off the sharp cheddar last week and haven't been to the store to get more.
American cheese although a heavily processed "cheese food" is one of the greatest dairy products in history. And so American. Fake but real, from a farm and a factory and lest we forget it is a solid that becomes a creamy gooey liquid with just a touch of heat!
Quote from: stephee72 on March 15, 2015, 11:57:57 AM
Lol.....yes I can definitely see that too... Man they are so helpful. And my fuzzy pink ones keep me warm.
Fuzzy pink boobs? Sweetie has a pair of those. They were a gag gift from people at work.
Quote from: Kellam on March 15, 2015, 02:29:11 PM
American cheese although a heavily processed "cheese food" is one of the greatest dairy products in history. And so American. Fake but real, from a farm and a factory and lest we forget it is a solid that becomes a creamy gooey liquid with just a touch of heat!
Add a patriotic soundtrack and you've got something here!
I wonder if people can stand the real sight of the marsh monster.
Only click below if you have a strong heart...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
I can, change the darn avatar!
Thinking "Dagnabbit, it's snowing. Not what I wanted to see" >:(
Can't do that, my current avatar is nice and pleasant looking.
I fought myself about this for a while now. Last year I was sort of set on the idea that I belong with this community. I took a break from the idea that I'm transgender (not that I denied that I was, it was more so because I didn't have the resources to pursue it happily and legally), because it was honestly, only causing me stress. I ended up moving to an apartment with my brother in a different state, and pursued a career for rent money. I'm back here now, maybe seeking a relaxed state of mind. I dunno, though.
Quote from: Orchid on March 15, 2015, 03:30:24 PM
I fought myself about this for a while now. Last year I was sort of set on the idea that I belong with this community. I took a break from the idea that I'm transgender (not that I denied that I was, it was more so because I didn't have the resources to pursue it happily and legally), because it was honestly, only causing me stress. I ended up moving to an apartment with my brother in a different state, and pursued a career for rent money. I'm back here now, maybe seeking a relaxed state of mind. I dunno, though.
Welcome back, but howdaheck do you get an avatar, gender marker, and two reputation points on one post that didn't get any reputation points? <scratching head>
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 15, 2015, 03:36:22 PM
Welcome back, but howdaheck do you get an avatar, gender marker, and two reputation points on one post that didn't get any reputation points? <scratching head>
Hugs, Devlyn
I deleted my posts. All of them. I'd like to get back to where I was, but that'll happen over time.
Sorry about the confusion! I joined up in August of last year, and in impulse I deleted my posts. I miss the family, so I'm back, and I won't make any of those... irrational choices anymore. I think. xD
I figured it was something like that! Don't worry, I'm easily confused anyway! :laugh:
Hugs, Devlyn
I'm thinking about what I'm going to wear if I even get this job interview...
I like signing my new name, have yet to stuff it up at work yet. Hopefully I don't have a brain explosion and accidentally use the old one
The check I wrote and attached to my name change application has cleared, hope that means my papers are in the mail :D
i'd appreciate any input: https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,184830.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,184830.0.html)
I've my top surgery in a week from today, and while I'm happy, I can't help but feel nervous about how my chest is going to turn out. Also my "friends" are out of town for spring break the week I recover, so I'm going to be alone for the majority of my recovery. I think my dad will help me out, but he's incredibly busy with his work, and I can't ask any other people I know in the area because they don't know I'm trans. Hopefully the narcotics will knock me out for the first few days and my recovery doesn't take too much of a toll out of me. Heh, and to think that I already told friends about my surgery happening and nobody even bothered to ask if I wanted/needed help, and when I mentioned to some of them that I would appreciate a hand or two, they all came up with excuses.
So I'm going to be spending a week or two bored, lonely, and in pain. Fun. At least it'll be worth it in the end.
Wonder how long she'll keep trolling?
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 02:46:28 PM
Wonder how long she'll keep trolling?
Depends, are the fish biting?
Quote from: marsh monster on March 16, 2015, 02:54:50 PM
Depends, are the fish biting?
Good point. Yes, they are.
I think I have to barf again. Well, it's official. I'm sick and today sucks.
Sick today, but will work from home later today.
We have a Pride event at work tomorrow, should I go.
I have very little in common with them so not sure.
J
My periods are clickable now, lol(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
i hope you all of you that are sick are feeling better soon.
which reminds me, i get the stomach flu every five years. i first got it when i was four, then nine, and then again at 14.
well, i wonder what i'm getting when i'm 19...
i know the human brain always looks for (and typically finds) patterns and consistencies, even if one doesn't exist, but you have to admit that this occurrence is pretty strange.
I wonder if I should buy one of those gas suits on GTA V: Online. They arepretty expensive. and I don't know if they are worth it.
Quote from: marsh monster on March 16, 2015, 06:42:48 PM
My periods are clickable now, lol(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
That's pretty slick(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F0514111016_zps11af7564.jpg&hash=2b7c7333d5d2197fd247f4a69be5a70963706094)
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 06:55:50 PM
That's pretty slick(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F0514111016_zps11af7564.jpg&hash=2b7c7333d5d2197fd247f4a69be5a70963706094)
Mine is scarier(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
:laugh:
Quote from: marsh monster on March 16, 2015, 07:01:52 PM
Mine is scarier(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
:laugh:
You must not have read the Pope thread, mine represents global annihilation(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F0514111016_zps11af7564.jpg&hash=2b7c7333d5d2197fd247f4a69be5a70963706094)
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 07:25:57 PM
You must not have read the Pope thread, mine represents global annihilation(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F0514111016_zps11af7564.jpg&hash=2b7c7333d5d2197fd247f4a69be5a70963706094)
Well you got me there, I'm just a minor irritation(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
I just set up my first fish tank! I have 5 blue guppies and 3 dwarf rainbows. Everything turned out much better than expected. I want to buy some tetras that I saw at the last minute at the store, but you have to wait before introducing new fish so I want to go in next week or the week after that.
My boss can't see me as anything but male. Yet one of my regulars keeps coming on to me, that I usually try and hide in the back room when I see him.
Telling him I'm not into guys really dosen't seem to help me for some reason
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 17, 2015, 02:23:53 AM
My boss can't see me as anything but male. Yet one of my regulars keeps coming on to me, that I usually try and hide in the back room when I see him.
Telling him I'm not into guys really dosen't seem to help me for some reason
Your boss is a dick!
Quote from: Cindy on March 17, 2015, 02:35:23 AM
Your boss is a dick!
Yes and we are going to have this conversation, about me and my gender first thing tommorow morning.
(Letter is typed and it's his first shift this week)
Ugh I screwed myself up so bad. My sleep patterns are ruined again (not my fault, it was work) and I drank a Red Bull which I know tends to affect me negatively and now I feel gross.
I'm sitting here in the lobby waiting for my daughter to be finished with her MRI. Scared for her, but we should know what's wrong with her shoulder. Surgery is probably in her near future. Poor kid.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 02:46:28 PM
Wonder how long she'll keep trolling?
Quote from: marsh monster on March 16, 2015, 02:54:50 PM
Depends, are the fish biting?
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 02:59:15 PM
Good point. Yes, they are.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 02:59:15 PM
Good point. Yes, they are.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 02:59:15 PM
Good point. Yes, they are.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2015, 02:59:15 PM
Good point. Yes, they are.
I'm having another "THE TALK" with my boss very soon, he still has no smegging idea. Anyone want to trade places with me right now?
Huh. My dad bought me a men's T-shirt and two hoodies. What is this sorcery?!
Kiss me, I'm Irish! :-*
OK, like half Irish... So kiss me with one lip.
I'm also part Scot. So... drink me, I'm Scotch?
Part English too, so, umm... just kiss me with your stiff upper lip?
A bit German and Jewish too, so spank me and feel guilty for it.
That is all. Happy St. Patricks day from a real American mutt! ;)
That's all ?!?
How about fight me like I'm French
Love me like I'm Italian
Tax me like I'm Danish
........
Quote from: Jill F on March 17, 2015, 06:51:25 PM
Kiss me, I'm Irish! :-*
OK, like half Irish... So kiss me with one lip.
I'm also part Scot. So... drink me, I'm Scotch?
Part English too, so, umm... just kiss me with your stiff upper lip?
A bit German and Jewish too, so spank me and feel guilty for it.
That is all. Happy St. Patricks day from a real American mutt! ;)
Lick me, I'm from Lichtenstein?
Neuter me, I'm from Switzerland?
OK, bad Jill. I'm really done with this. I must confess that I'm not even remotely Swiss. I am all of the other things I mentioned, though.
Being Swiss just means that you have not made up your mind and you never will because there is so much bureaucracy, even declaring war will take at least 5 years once someone invades you.
Mind you, this is ingenious!
It is all about the cheese
(https://sp.yimg.com/ib/th?id=HN.608007399268090645&pid=15.1&P=0)
I'm from Poland, you can...........er, never mind. >:-)
Somebody stole a package off my porch while I was at work. But the joke's on them, it was only a two dollar bottle of nail polish remover! Ha!
Quote from: Kellam on March 17, 2015, 10:00:50 PM
Somebody stole a package off my porch while I was at work. But the joke's on them, it was only a two dollar bottle of nail polish remover! Ha!
What if they mistake it for artisan vodka?
Will my son and daughter, both in their twenties ever get a full time job or will they die in poverty?
Quote from: Jill F on March 18, 2015, 12:56:18 AM
What if they mistake it for artisan vodka?
Mixed with RedBull, or perhaps in a Cape codder? Gross.
Quote from: pollypagan on March 18, 2015, 02:43:09 AM
Will my son and daughter, both in their twenties ever get a full time job or will they die in poverty?
Lmao pretty sure my mom thinks the same thing from time to time. Especially about me when my mental illness was at its worst. Thankfully, I got everything on track last summer jobwise which was a huge relief to her and transitioning made me significantly more stable.
Mah face looks like the moonscape today after electro yesterday and I have to get groceries. That totally blows goats.
Quote from: Jill F on March 18, 2015, 03:59:20 PM
That totally blows goats.
I would think that might be more fun for another goat.
I wish my niece would stop trying to tell me my gender. Sunday it was "you're a boy". Tonight it was "you're a girl". I wish she would just shut up. She is making it harder for me to come out. Like seriously, SHUT UP! UGH!
I'm thinking that it is time to put on some music, dance around, do the dishes and maybe some more housework. Gotta kill the hour until Seinfeld comes on!
I want to hear the Captain Planet's theme song performed by Motorhead.
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..............WHAT?
I tend to give advice not because I feel smarter, but because I'm sure I've done more stupid sh*t than most.
Finding a place to volunteer at for experience is hard. :embarrassed:
Quote from: DragonBeer on March 19, 2015, 02:11:37 PM
Finding a place to volunteer at for experience is hard. :embarrassed:
Finding a place to work for pay ain't any easier.
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 19, 2015, 03:19:26 PM
Finding a place to work for pay ain't any easier.
If Susan halved, doubled, or tripled my salary here, I'd still make the same amount.
I'm enjoying my raise. I now get 00 instead of 0.
After last shifts major boo boo (I overpaid someone $1500 ouch), I really don't want to be here today. But my confidence will never come back unless I actually get back behind the counter and start again.
I have my appointment for my Hormone Readiness Assessment today in just a few hours...I'm a ball of nervous energy...it is spring today...! :)
Best wishes Kellam!!
I'm thinking about getting revision done for my exams in two months. Not gonna happen :D
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 20, 2015, 02:48:47 AM
After last shifts major boo boo (I overpaid someone $1500 ouch), I really don't want to be here today. But my confidence will never come back unless I actually get back behind the counter and start again.
Hugs!
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 20, 2015, 06:38:15 AM
Hugs!
Thanks. I just need to think 'You will be able to claim some of it back on tax' (only way I'll be able to sleep). But I'm now going to be very jittery with the money again for awhile.
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 20, 2015, 07:02:27 AM
Thanks. I just need to think 'You will be able to claim some of it back on tax' (only way I'll be able to sleep). But I'm now going to be very jittery with the money again for awhile.
I don't think I could deal with a job where I could make that kind of mistake and have to repay it. How long do they give you to pay it back?
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 20, 2015, 09:49:59 AM
I don't think I could deal with a job where I could make that kind of mistake and have to repay it. How long do they give you to pay it back?
Depends on the venue and the boss themselves. He wasn't able to cover it this week, so I had until Sunday to pay the money back. My emergency fund took a pounding lately.
You learn how to be very careful very quickly.
Happy Spring!
Quote from: Jill F on March 20, 2015, 05:36:27 PM
Happy Spring!
Three inches of mother-effin' snow, thank you very much!
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 20, 2015, 05:57:42 PM
Three inches of mother-effin' snow, thank you very much!
80 degrees and sunny in Los Angeles...
I'm thinking I'm having a vuja day. I've totally had this entire day before.
Quote from: Jill F on March 20, 2015, 06:22:20 PM
80 degrees and sunny in Los Angeles...
I'm thinking I'm having a vuja day. I've totally had this entire day before.
80° and sunny in Los Angeles, of course you've had that day before. I spent July and half of August in Santa Monica in 1970. I probably had that day at least 30 times myself. Tell me again why I'm living in New York state? I personally have no idea.
Ugh. The rain is back with a vengeance. And I really wanted to take the bike out today...
Pro tip: when you make coffee, make sure you have enough milk for it.
Good thing I still have energy drink left from yesterday.
First rain day of the season today.
I wonder if Susan would like a humor section in the Phoenix set up.
R.I.P. A.J. Pero
It seems as if a lot of threads end when I post to them. This has got to be happening to everyone, right?
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 21, 2015, 07:06:10 AM
It seems as if a lot of threads end when I post to them. This has got to be happening to everyone, right?
Threads end for various reasons, most notably popular threads end when it's time to start a new one after so many posts
Haven't noted you as a particular problem or reason for any threads ending though
Hugs
Quote from: V M on March 21, 2015, 07:30:18 AM
Threads end for various reasons, most notably popular threads end when it's time to start a new one after so many posts
Haven't noted you as a particular problem or reason for any threads ending though
Hugs
I know. Just seems that way sometimes.
Understandable, we all go through a plethora of various feelings and emotions while upon our individual journeys :)
There are times I feel ignored, disregarded or even crapped on and disrespected, but I just do my best to keep a positive outlook and endeavor to help others to the best of my abilities and be appreciative and thankful for the few nice occurrences in life
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 21, 2015, 07:06:10 AM
It seems as if a lot of threads end when I post to them. This has got to be happening to everyone, right?
I used to get that feeling all the time when I used other forum sites. Whenever I'd post, no matter how popular the thread, it seemed to dry up almost instantly. So I feel you on that. :( But it's like V M said, threads end for a lot of reasons. It's more than likely you've just got some bad timing.
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 21, 2015, 07:06:10 AM
It seems as if a lot of threads end when I post to them. This has got to be happening to everyone, right?
That's weird, I though I was the resident thread killer. I just figure that whatever I had to say couldn't be topped.
She is *thunder*... The Most Interesting Woman in the World!
*cue ominous music*
I don't always post at Susan's, but when I do, it's usually quite awesome.
(Note to self: buy beer for later.)
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 19, 2015, 03:19:26 PM
Finding a place to work for pay ain't any easier.
Seeing as I'm starting from scratch again after my name change, I have to volunteer for some experience.
Hmm, I wonder what my uncle would say if I click 'Send' in this coming out letter...
Quote from: Jill F on March 21, 2015, 02:57:17 PM
(Note to self: buy beer for later.)
What sort of beer. Stout, Ale or Larger?
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 21, 2015, 04:36:02 PM
What sort of beer. Stout, Ale or Larger?
Good idea. I'll get the big bottles.
Quote from: Jill F on March 21, 2015, 04:39:24 PM
Good idea. I'll get the big bottles.
Should oh picked that one up shupid bad spelling. How many years did I work behind a bar. That was so embarrassment
Well you can get the Darwin stubbie in Oz. It's a 2L bottle
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 21, 2015, 04:43:23 PM
Should oh picked that one up shupid bad spelling. How many years did I work behind a bar. That was so embarrassment
Well you can get the Darwin stubbie in Oz. It's a 2L bottle
Is it called Darwin because you'll remove yourself from the gene pool if you drink it all?
Quote from: Dee Walker on March 21, 2015, 05:58:57 PM
Is it called Darwin because you'll remove yourself from the gene pool if you drink it all?
That's just a starter for some Australians, (joke Joyce). It's from NT draught, but in true Aussie logic its bottled in North Queensland. Not the Northern Territory, capital city Darwin
It was nice having a pizza party with 5 other transwomen here tonight. Maybe next time we can break my house record of 6 transpeople at once. C'mon guys, we need some guys next time!
Was invited to play poker with the guys last night. I went despite not knowing any of these guys, not being really good at poker, and of course, not actually being one of the guys! [emoji15]
Quote from: ChiGirl on March 22, 2015, 06:24:48 AM
Was invited to play poker with the guys last night. I went despite not knowing any of these guys, not being really good at poker, and of course, not actually being one of the guys! [emoji15]
Suddenly that sounds risky. I hadn't realized how much I've acclimated.
I worked out why I was so off at work during yesterdays shift, I had forgotten to take my morning does of 'E'. Now for a girl who has and still takes other medication since she was young, this is an embaressment (I should know better). Sorry people for biting your heads off, wont happen again
I'm thinking that Gypsy reminded me that for us PMS is voluntary.
I'm thinking I broke a rib. It was a fun weekend!
Ribs On the Barbie you say?
*Gentle Hugs Sis* Feel better soon :-* :-* :-*
How would I work out setting up a weekly online FTM support group meeting...
Wow, I've miss a lot on here. Anyway, I am done with my training at Celadon. So I guess I've gone from Maggot to Rookie status. Which is great. But by Easter I will be driving for Panther Logistics. I'm tired of the BS piddly paychecks. And the Expedite business seems like a better fit for me. On top of that, I'm moving to Sedro-Woolley, Washington.
Once upon a time, I would have been moving here to be closer to Birkin. But, I've finally gotten over him. He will always be very dear to me and have a special place in my heart, but, in the end, he was just as transient as everyone else who's ever been in my life. Now, I just want to move here because it's closer to the VFX work I want to get into. And Washington is gorgeous. Besides, Indiana just passed a "Religious Discrimination" Bill, HB 101. So Indiana can kiss my hoop and vote it's self back to the stone age.
I have to work Easter -sigh-.
My sister braided my hair....only thing is she used extensions, therefore making it look more girly. I call this stuff "horse hair". No offense to others who wear extensions and all of that, but this just isn't for me. This makes my head feel bulky and heavy. I hate having this horse hair in my head, but at least that means I won't have to do anything to it, and it will last longer. My mother wanted her to do something other than braid it straight down, but I said no. I really wish my mother would stop trying to live her life through my hair. Even with it my hair braided straight down, I still look very girly. I'm going to have wear a bandana to "man" it up.
Both your having to work Easter and their doing that stinks. I Hope you won't be stuck with the horse hair very long. I have no doubt having it in for you is extremely disconcerting and irritating to say the least. Hopefully you find away to man it up as you to help counter that affect that the horse hair causes. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: King Malachite on March 23, 2015, 11:14:13 PM
I have to work Easter -sigh-.
My sister braided my hair....only thing is she used extensions, therefore making it look more girly. I call this stuff "horse hair". No offense to others who wear extensions and all of that, but this just isn't for me. This makes my head feel bulky and heavy. I hate having this horse hair in my head, but at least that means I won't have to do anything to it, and it will last longer. My mother wanted her to do something other than braid it straight down, but I said no. I really wish my mother would stop trying to live her life through my hair. Even with it my hair braided straight down, I still look very girly. I'm going to have wear a bandana to "man" it up.
Quote from: Mariah2014 on March 23, 2015, 11:22:26 PM
Both your having to work Easter and their doing that stinks. I Hope you won't be stuck with the horse hair very long. I have no doubt having it in for you is extremely disconcerting and irritating to say the least. Hopefully you find away to man it up as you to help counter that affect that the horse hair causes. Hugs
Mariah
Thanks, Mariah *hugs* It just gets so tiring having to live a lie day in and day out.
It's a beautiful morning and after work I get to go listen to Laverne Cox speak :)
I think we can all relate to that at one point or another along our journeys.
Mariah
Quote from: King Malachite on March 24, 2015, 12:41:24 AM
Thanks, Mariah *hugs* It just gets so tiring having to live a lie day in and day out.
Quote from: Mariah2014 on March 24, 2015, 07:51:33 AM
I think we can all relate to that at one point or another along our journeys.
Mariah
Hopefully TOO much time won't pass before I start my transition. I should really get on that.
Just thinking about transitioning. Still have to wait for at least half a year before I can go to a doctor to start off and see if I can get T after the appointments with a therapist.
I seriously think the girls at my hairdresser don't relise I'm trans*, female yes, trans* no. I've been going there for awhile now and I have been correctly gendered enough for me to know it is no longer an accident, and I am hearing them correctly not just wishful hearing.
Something strange is happening. A liquid is falling from the sky. I Googled it, seemingly it is called rain!
First I have seen in 65 days :laugh:
My name is more common as a nickname (alex, dan, mel, nat, sam, vic). Being called the full version of my name use to bug me, even the girls version. It's not my name dagnamit.
While I've kept my name I don't mind if people do call me the full version. This must mean I've grown up
NO! I CAN'T HAVE!!!! *runs to the nearest toy store and takes all the stuffed toys she can carry*
Thats OK. I don't wanna grow up, I'm a Toys R us kid.
Quote from: LordKAT on March 25, 2015, 03:02:53 AM
Thats OK. I don't wanna grow up, I'm a Toys R us kid.
We can stay young together then
Quote from: Cindy on March 25, 2015, 01:58:39 AM
Something strange is happening. A liquid is falling from the sky. I Googled it, seemingly it is called rain!
First I have seen in 65 days :laugh:
Remember the soap. :)
Quote from: Jenny07 on March 25, 2015, 03:59:53 AM
Quote from: Cindy on March 25, 2015, 01:58:39 AM
Something strange is happening. A liquid is falling from the sky. I Googled it, seemingly it is called rain!
First I have seen in 65 days :laugh:
Remember the soap. :)
I don't watch reality TV
I'm so sad because I don't think this particular ebay seller is listing anymore hiking rain sticks. I was going to bid on one the other week, but right when I was about to bid, my internet shut down. I could have gotten that for $14. Now when they relisted it, the same stick sold for about $26. This is horrible! I'm trying to apply the sour grapes principle here, but dangit, I wanted that rainstick! :(
My first appointment with my neurophysiologist since I went full time and had all my details changed, slightly nervous. Today (26 March) is Purple day for epilepsy awareness, I have to see my neuro today for my epilepsy. So I'm hoping this means that everything will be fine
I'm thinking that it's best to skip the Van Halen show at the Hollywood Bowl. Last time they took me for $500 and sucked mightily.
Van Halen is still around?
Quote from: V M on March 25, 2015, 04:36:55 PM
Van Halen is still around?
Tour just announced. Anyone want to wager whether they finish this one?
Yeah, DLR is pretty awful now. If I ever see him at 7-11 again and he doesn't refund my money, he'll be needing a surgery similar to the one I had last summer.
That I don't like pain. Got to the painkillers and crawled back to bed. Staying here.
I have the strong desire to address our mall cop according to his rank, so I asked him what his official rank was, so I could address him as such. He said his official rank was his birthname, and to call him by that.
I'm just going to keep calling him officer, lol.
So tired of dealing with physical issues, spinal injuries etc related to various accidents and being sick and broke almost all the time :P I don't have much of a life and should probably just end it and get it over with
Quote from: V M on March 26, 2015, 04:20:08 AM
So tired of dealing with physical issues, spinal injuries etc related to various accidents and being sick and broke almost all the time :P I don't have much of a life and should probably just end it and get it over with
That would be a massive loss. I'm also broke all the time with physical limitations. Who would I commiserate with?
..and who would be there to help figure out my errors.
Hugs dear lady. Here something to help a tad. (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.keybridgemed.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2FPot-of-Gold.jpg&hash=860d12e3d0f6fcb11666e8e2a5b4f5f041db7d3c)
*Hugs Kat*
i ordered a binder from underworks three days ago and its status says "delivered" since a few hours ago but i dont get my mail directly so i'm anxiously waiting hoping to get it from my landlord -who receives all the mail and gives it to the people living on their ground- very soon. Also very stoked to go to the family doctor next week to ask for a refferal for the medical center aaaaaaah
To the people who say just don't think about something. Guess what it don't work
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 26, 2015, 07:41:07 PM
To the people who say just don't think about something. Guess what it don't work
"White bears" (http://www.apa.org/monitor/2011/10/unwanted-thoughts.aspx) can be pretty hard to shake.
If you're not sure what I mean by "white bears" it comes from the thought experiment in that link. It's some pretty interesting stuff.
Where else can you go where you can go from discussing makeup to the advantages of pulling your pud?
And I'm currently a bit disappointed in a couple siblings. I do remember to call them on their birthdays. Oh well, at least one brother and his family texted me the other day for it.
And that head shrinker prep thread made me look up actual head shrinking. not pretty...
So when I went to the mall the other day with my horse hair in, the officer complimented it. I told him, it's just supposed to last until after I come back from my trip, and he told me that maybe I will come back with a boyfriend....
*sigh*
I have the kitchen to clean up and some washing to do in the laundry. Praise be to God for the gift of such minor concerns.
Well I had my chest surgery yesterday. It hurts. Lol. He has me wearing a binder for several months 24/7. I can take it off in a few weeks to shower, maybe, but until I can take it off I have no idea what my chest looks like. It's so swollen it's still as though I have boobs. I guess only time will tell.
Quote from: birkin on March 28, 2015, 08:42:33 PM
Well I had my chest surgery yesterday. It hurts. Lol. He has me wearing a binder for several months 24/7. I can take it off in a few weeks to shower, maybe, but until I can take it off I have no idea what my chest looks like. It's so swollen it's still as though I have boobs. I guess only time will tell.
OMG CONGRATS, BIRKIN!!!! I'm sooooo happy for you! It has been a long time coming. I would give you a virtual hug, but I wouldn't want to damage your virtual chest, lol! :)
Thanks!! I am happy about it and hoping the results will be worth it. With how swollen they are now I'm terrified I'll have to wear a bra still...but I doubt it and I will cross that bridge when I get there. And yeah hugs are definitely not an option lol I can't do anything with my arms.
Quote from: birkin on March 28, 2015, 11:50:38 PM
Thanks!! I am happy about it and hoping the results will be worth it. With how swollen they are now I'm terrified I'll have to wear a bra still...but I doubt it and I will cross that bridge when I get there. And yeah hugs are definitely not an option lol I can't do anything with my arms.
Haha! Make sure to take it easy, man! I'm sure you will fall in love with your new chest. :)
Finding work controlling my life, working 7 days and not enjoying it.
I wonder when I will get to the male fail point. It's so hard keeping a grip. I don't want to but can't yet. If someone had her way it would last week.
I love what little time I have off, as I don't have to hide it.
It's amazing how low dose has done so much. I hate to think how fast full dose would have worked.
Hmmm, what top surgeon to consider...
Quote from: King Malachite on March 28, 2015, 11:56:02 PM
Haha! Make sure to take it easy, man! I'm sure you will fall in love with your new chest. :)
They didn't have to shave the chest at all which I was happy for. It's the one thing that makes it look half decently manly in my eyes at this point. But it has gone down a lot in swelling and I can see it's gonna be ok. I wasn't too happy with my grandma. I was over at her house yesterday and in pain and whatnot, trying to get on the couch comfortably and she called me "she" twice. She corrected herself but it was still hurtful considering that I'm going through all this because I am not a she in the first place.
Also three years on T and been out to family for 5 years or so....
I'm thinking about how good it is that I haven't fallen asleep saying "no, no, no" since reaching self acceptance. I could never understand it before, didn't know why it happened...
Im thinking, sometimes you just have to say... "What the F#*k, and go for it"....
I built a rack to hold 100 bottles of wine today and now my back is killing me. I'm thinking that rack is about to have 99 bottles in it.
Quote from: Jill F on March 29, 2015, 07:09:01 PM
I built a rack to hold 100 bottles of wine today and now my back is killing me. I'm thinking that rack is about to have 99 bottles in it.
sounds like the beginning of a drinking song...
An alien egg my roommate brought home. I'm worried(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2Falien%2520egg.jpg&hash=cf15c49a1af24a8f3a289c2160c591add1d00dbb)
Quote from: marsh monster on March 29, 2015, 08:39:51 PM
An alien egg my roommate brought home. I'm worried(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2Falien%2520egg.jpg&hash=cf15c49a1af24a8f3a289c2160c591add1d00dbb)
Burn it with fire before whatever is inside hatches and decides to give your face a friendly hug
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 29, 2015, 09:13:15 PM
Burn it with fire before whatever is inside hatches and decides to give your face a friendly hug
I'm locking my bedroom door just in case tonight(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
Quote from: marsh monster on March 29, 2015, 09:36:19 PM
I'm locking my bedroom door just in case tonight(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
With a flamethrower or some other incineration device. You don't really know what's in there
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 29, 2015, 11:21:45 PM
Quote from: marsh monster on March 29, 2015, 09:36:19 PM
I'm locking my bedroom door just in case tonight(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
With a flamethrower or some other incineration device. You don't really know what's in there
I believe a call to a person called Ripley is needed, she has experience in this area :icon_2gun: :icon_suspicious:
Quote from: birkin on March 28, 2015, 08:42:33 PM
Well I had my chest surgery yesterday. It hurts. Lol. He has me wearing a binder for several months 24/7. I can take it off in a few weeks to shower, maybe, but until I can take it off I have no idea what my chest looks like. It's so swollen it's still as though I have boobs. I guess only time will tell.
Congratulations! I'm so happy for you. :D
Sorry I didn't see this earlier. Life on the road as a team driver doesn't leave me much time to get online. :(
Just finished my last run as a Rookie tonight with my trainer. Now I go solo. My trainer gave me my CB handle. "Dash". Because I shoot out from the stop lights like a Derby horse and because when I get behind the wheel and get onto the highways and interstates, I just keep running. I dont stop until I take my mandatory 30 min break and run out of hours. I beat my record and ran 683.9 miles in one day. She also hung a little MLP "Rainbow Dash" from the sun visor for me.
She didnt know Rainbow Dash was my favorite. lol. Then tonight it hit me. My middle name is Raine. So... Raine "Dash". She didn't know that was my middle name either. What are the odds?
I will also be leaving the trucking company I am with and go to another one. Better pay doing expedited driving. But I will miss the Kenworth T-680 I have been driving. She was a great truck!
Quote from: Cindy on March 29, 2015, 11:27:11 PM
With a flamethrower or some other incineration device. You don't really know what's in there
I believe a call to a person called Ripley is needed, she has experience in this area :icon_2gun: :icon_suspicious:
You called? >:-)
I believe 4 year olds are the new terrible twos
I will have a rant. My very accepting brother in law calls up and says. 'Hey man, I look forward to the BBQ on Friday.
Me, why are you calling me a man?
Oh I forgot.
Give me me the flame thrower, buffalo oysters are going to be on the BBQ, I'm going do them in situ.
Quote from: Cindy on March 30, 2015, 04:23:48 AM
I will have a rant. My very accepting brother in law calls up and says. 'Hey man, I look forward to the BBQ on Friday.
Me, why are you calling me a man?
Oh I forgot.
Give me me the flame thrower, buffalo oysters are going to be on the BBQ, I'm going do them in situ.
Hugs Cindy. You deserve much better from your family, every' slip can hurt us severely
Quote from: birkin on March 29, 2015, 01:35:41 PM
They didn't have to shave the chest at all which I was happy for. It's the one thing that makes it look half decently manly in my eyes at this point. But it has gone down a lot in swelling and I can see it's gonna be ok. I wasn't too happy with my grandma. I was over at her house yesterday and in pain and whatnot, trying to get on the couch comfortably and she called me "she" twice. She corrected herself but it was still hurtful considering that I'm going through all this because I am not a she in the first place.
Also three years on T and been out to family for 5 years or so....
Dang, I know that must be rough for you. I truly admire your resiliency with how you deal with your family on the subject. On another note, did they have to shave your armpits? I've never heard of the chest being shaved before the surgery, but I suppose that would make sense.
I'm thinking that I should probably just shut the f up before I make things worse. I'm not good at giving advice.
Quote from: King Malachite on March 30, 2015, 08:19:46 PM
Dang, I know that must be rough for you. I truly admire your resiliency with how you deal with your family on the subject. On another note, did they have to shave your armpits? I've never heard of the chest being shaved before the surgery, but I suppose that would make sense.
Thanks. It's easier now that I have places in my life where no one knows...I get treated as the man I am everywhere else so it makes it easier to tolerate anything my family does. Except my dad today. He's being a huge jerk about the surgery. Like...so bad I won't even repeat it here because it will upset and trigger others. He's just a lost cause in general. If I wasn't transgender he would find something else because he hates his life and needs an easy target. I hope I can be better to my children.
They didn't shave my armpits. I only got an incision at the nipples and the nurse said it would be easier just to leave it. I got a look at the chest today...it's definitely smaller and my nipples held up wonderful, have shrank some. But the chest...still looks like boobs. Thing is though, they did warn me that this would take several months and for a while it would look weird. And I did expect minor revisions would need to be done in the future. All in all I feel ok about it. Nervous that this isn't swelling and is just boobs, but the procedure has been done and I trust in the doctors expertise when he said he could manage my large chest.
That my mother is making it worse on herself the longer she avoids me. Mum I'm a grown woman people actually see me and treat me like the girl I've always been. Grow the (church bells) up, for (way more church bells I think a warfie's head just exploded) and answer your phone.
I'm thinking that a certain marsh monster is harder on herself than anyone is to her.
I'm thinking that if I have to listen to jackhammers all day again tomorrow I will probably go batty bats. Wheeee!!!
Why are people calling me good looking, attractive, handsome, cute, etc...
WHAT IS THIS SORCERY?!
Quote from: DragonBeer on March 31, 2015, 02:26:20 PM
Why are people calling me good looking, attractive, handsome, cute, etc...
WHAT IS THIS SORCERY?!
I just wanna pinch your lil' cheek!
Dee
(Grandma in training)
Quote from: LordKAT on March 31, 2015, 01:25:54 PM
I'm thinking that a certain marsh monster is harder on herself than anyone is to her.
But marsh monsters are horrid creatures, hideous to gaze upon and all that feeding on hapless travelers thing going on.
Quote from: marsh monster on March 31, 2015, 02:42:50 PM
But marsh monsters are horrid creatures, hideous to gaze upon and all that feeding on hapless travelers thing going on.
Good thing I'm not hapless. (What is a hap anyway)
Now as to horrid creatures and hideousness, I know better.
Quote from: LordKAT on April 01, 2015, 03:43:09 AM
Good thing I'm not hapless. (What is a hap anyway)
A guy I knew in high school, first person to say he would marry me if only I was a woman. Frankly, you're better off Hapless.
Wondering when some people will remember that its April Fools Day.
I do. I just don't like drawing more attention to it than necessary.
Mariah
Quote from: marsh monster on April 01, 2015, 01:08:21 PM
Wondering when some people will remember that its April Fools Day.
Quote from: LordKAT on April 01, 2015, 03:43:09 AM
Good thing I'm not hapless. (What is a hap anyway)
Now as to horrid creatures and hideousness, I know better.
You can't go by fake pics(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi686.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fvv228%2Fjaime_r_d%2FPicture%2520275.jpg&hash=de474d9ca6019622be1ff7bcdb2e6a00c3e4c85f)
Day 3 of jackhammer symphony with wetsaw and sledge.
Yup, I think the cheese is officially slipping off my cracker.
Quote from: Jill F on April 01, 2015, 02:05:22 PM
Day 3 of jackhammer symphony with wetsaw and sledge.
Yup, I think the cheese is officially slipping off my cracker.
But the big question is, would anyone really notice the difference? >:-)
What a lovely day to be born (I'm a living and breathing April Fool for reals). I suppose me being trans was the April Fools joke played on my mom by the nature, even if it came ~20 years later. xD
I stopped swelling thank god. I thought I would die in these binders but now I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I gotta say, man, I am so happy for Chaz Bono. He has come so far and looks absolutely incredible. Like he is very handsome and distinguished looking. I can't honestly say I wouldn't mind looking like him when I'm older. Also, I don't know if I could ever face public transition with the courage and dignity that he has.
Oh the horror. The girl in front of me has pulled her hair back with a rubber band. I was told off for doing that when I was 8
Quote from: birkin on March 28, 2015, 08:42:33 PM
Well I had my chest surgery yesterday. It hurts. Lol. He has me wearing a binder for several months 24/7. I can take it off in a few weeks to shower, maybe, but until I can take it off I have no idea what my chest looks like. It's so swollen it's still as though I have boobs. I guess only time will tell.
Congratulations :)
19000 posts? There's something wrong with me! :laugh:
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 01, 2015, 07:56:32 PM
19000 posts? There's something wrong with me! :laugh:
You better get busy if you wanna hit #1 anytime soon. Only about 4,000 more posts or so...
But if you want to hit -2,147,483,647 you just need 2,147,464,647 more
Quote from: marsh monster on April 01, 2015, 09:13:38 PM
You better get busy if you wanna hit #1 anytime soon. Only about 4,000 more posts or so...
How much sh*t can a dipsh*t dip if a dipsh*t could dip sh*t?
I'm thinking I know someone who knows the answer to that question from experience.
Will Scotland will ever be an independent country in my lifetime? That is what I'm thinking now; a thought that is always there in the back ground. The independence referendum result hurt me like a bereavement. I will never get over it. When I went to the USA after the result, for the first time in my life I was too ashamed to admit I was Scottish.
I slept in to long I needed to be up and hour earlier.
Mariah
Quote from: Jill F on April 02, 2015, 12:50:00 AM
How much sh*t can a dipsh*t dip if a dipsh*t could dip sh*t?
I'm thinking I know someone who knows the answer to that question from experience.
I'm going to say its potentially limitless.
Quote from: antonia on April 01, 2015, 09:23:14 PM
But if you want to hit -2,147,483,647 you just need 2,147,464,647 more
Unless Simple Machines is keeping count using an unsigned int! Then it's 4,294,948,295 posts until Devlyn reaches 0 :).
Quote from: Anna++ on April 02, 2015, 07:33:56 AM
Unless Simple Machines is keeping count using an unsigned int! Then it's 4,294,948,295 posts until Devlyn reaches 0 :).
Whadshesay? :laugh:
Computers are kinda stupid when the count, when you reach the largest number they can store they revert back to 0 or the lowest number they can hold :D
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 02, 2015, 07:51:03 AM
Whadshesay? :laugh:
So looking forward to a long weekend and guess what.
It rains all day just when I wanted to get out on my bike.
Forecast to rain tomorrow as well. Got to love Sydney Easter weather. :(
Got on with some projects from a few years ago.
Nice to see you Anna. :)
No penguins were armed making this post.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fts1.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DHN.608004272541273496%26amp%3Bpid%3D15.1%26amp%3BH%3D89%26amp%3BW%3D160&hash=e582952bd5a2cb8c19d79793a0d1d966aefb2b16)
I'm thinking I so wish I had been born a female or that my GRS were completed long ago & that my body had a nice depth vagina. A new man is courting me & he is 7-8 inches & very thick, such a beautiful penis. I would love to feel this massive penis inside my vagina, ->-bleeped-<-ing me so nice & hard. My panties get wet just thinking about this size penis. Oh me, GF's, what to do? I still remember the last man I dated that had such a large penis, I just melted for him & loved to suck him or feel him inside me. I so wished then that I could just open my legs to feel him inside me & then wrap my legs around him to hold him deep inside me.
...these foils have been in my hair forever!
Going to see Michael Schenker tonight. I'm thinking the odds of me getting a VIP booth are pretty good.
Just home from pub. Need food that I don't need.
Try shelled sunflower seeds, they take so long to unshell that you could starve to death while doing nothing but trying to eat them.
Quote from: pollypagan on April 03, 2015, 05:57:19 PM
Just home from pub. Need food that I don't need.
I am finally home from Florida. I can't say the trip was really good as we didn't get to go to Bush Gardens as we planned, and I went to the Cheesecake factory and paid $25 for a mediocre meal, and then a little over $7 on my way home from Mcdonalds that was also mediocre. Plus, the Wifi was virtually nonexistent, which really sucked since I lugged my speakers to the trip. I pray to God that this is not a foreshadowing of what my top surgery experience will be like in Florida.....
It wasn't all doom and gloom though. For one, none of my valuables were stolen, broken, missing, or left by accident. Well, there was a surgical mask I had that went missing, but I have a bunch of those. I took a bunch of the small things gave them to my mom as souvenirs. I got her two boxes of tissues, a ton of coffee and tea packets, a pen, a roll of toilet paper, a bar of soap, some cups, grits, oatmeal, etc. Why buy my mom a stupid keychain when I can get stuff for free? The value of the things I got her probably exceed the cost of a keychain. I feel like Rosanne, lol.
It's official. I have a mancrush on Max Schneider.
My body hurts. Why are pain free days so rare?
Quote from: LordKAT on April 04, 2015, 07:54:49 PM
My body hurts. Why are pain free days so rare?
Because you're a walking case of KAT Scratch Fever? Any chance of hugging that pain right out of you? ;D
Hugs, Devlyn
Hugs do help. Thanks, Dev.
We didn't even have to drive down to the Hug Bank! :)
Hugs, Devlyn
Nope, personalized delivery is great service, don't ya think?
42
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
I got to meet up with a very dear friend who was in trucking school with me and we went to the mall. we had fun, even waiting in line so that she could get a photo of her granddaughter with the Easter Bunny. I didn't like the trip to the "Pink" store or "Victoria's secret". It just made me feel depressed and hate my body. I didn't have the heart to tell her how I was feeling so I soldiered on.
Tomorrow our new truck will arrive and I will be back on the road.
Why am I still awake when I need to get some sleep.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Money talks, but all it ever says is, "Goodbye!"
*le sigh*
Okay, this guy is starting to creep me the hell out...
"What are you thinking?"
I don't know what I was thinking. I ate a salad. It was all.....green, and some of the stuff in it tasted like. ....dirt and whatnot. Someone run and get the Marsh Monster, maybe she'll know what to do to help me!
I went to Easter Drunch (that's a Jill-ism, folks...) and the creepy Easter Bunny tried to steal my drink.
Seriously, WTF?
Carrot juice?
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 05, 2015, 05:34:01 PM
"What are you thinking?"
I don't know what I was thinking. I ate a salad. It was all.....green, and some of the stuff in it tasted like. ....dirt and whatnot. Someone run and get the Marsh Monster, maybe she'll know what to do to help me!
I'd say eat at least 6 hot tamales and call me in the morning.
Quote from: marsh monster on April 05, 2015, 05:57:31 PM
I'd say eat at least 6 hot tamales and call me in the morning.
I don't have any of those. I'm eating chocolate covered cherries thinking the sugar wiill neutralize the greenery. Ii don't know what I was thinking....
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 05, 2015, 06:10:57 PM
I don't have any of those. I'm eating chocolate covered cherries thinking the sugar wiill neutralize the greenery. Ii don't know what I was thinking....
I'm sure you'll be ok, after all it was just a salad, not really what you would call a true vegetable, just vegetable like.
And I've been asking people that if tomatoes are a fruit, then would ketchup be kind of like a fruit juice?
Quote from: marsh monster on April 05, 2015, 06:22:44 PM
I'm sure you'll be ok, after all it was just a salad, not really what you would call a true vegetable, just vegetable like.
And I've been asking people that if tomatoes are a fruit, then would ketchup be kind of like a fruit juice?
Well, the people you're asking may be fruits themselves, that would make their answers biased, wouldn't it?
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 05, 2015, 06:45:24 PM
Well, the people you're asking may be fruits themselves, that would make their answers biased, wouldn't it?
Nope, I'm pretty sure they were hetero...
lol
Don't worry, I have gay friends!
I have gay friends too. I just won't sell them pizza! >:-)
My mom gave gifts to the family for Easter. Part of my package included 2 16oz bottles of Mineral oil. She knows that I ran out. I love her. One bottle on Ebay costs me over $8, but she paid $1.29 per bottle for these. I really need to stock up! I use mineral oil to create wave bottles. Too bad I don't have any float-able objects to put in this time. Well, I do have some army men, and an idea for them. I thought about putting a couple of men in a wide gatorade bottle from opposing sides (baige and green) and make the waves the color of red, representing the blood bath that war causes, but I'm not sure if I would want that type of representation in my house. My mind is already a constant war inside, lol. I don't know. It would look cool though.
Came out to one of my regulars today. I think I broke he's brain >:-)
Quote from: marsh monster on April 05, 2015, 06:22:44 PM
I'm sure you'll be ok, after all it was just a salad, not really what you would call a true vegetable, just vegetable like.
And I've been asking people that if tomatoes are a fruit, then would ketchup be kind of like a fruit juice?
V8 is. Ketchup is more of a fruit spread, like apple butter.
These two people I'm talking to are weird or they are trying to flirt. What is this I don't even....
There has been quality chocolate in my house since Saturday, and none of it is mine. The torture, the horror, the pain even
Is it I who desires the pizza? Or is it the pizza that desires me?
I need to get a couple of sports bras, so I can feel more comfortable working out at a gym. However, that would be a waste of money considering I get my top surgery in 5 months......that AND I already have two sports bras. I just can't find them. Hopefully I will be able to find them soon.
The human body has over 7500 parts. They need measuring. This could take a while.
I have a feeling I'll eventually look like Markiplier... :o
someone said they saw me as a bunny today. weird. I keep getting called a bunny. what's with the bunnies these days
Quote from: enigmaticrorschach on April 09, 2015, 02:05:10 PM
someone said they saw me as a bunny today. weird. I keep getting called a bunny. what's with the bunnies these days
Easter
maybe that is what it is but easter has been over for almost a week. oh well. wonder what I'll get next, a fish maybe or a frog. who knows
I'm thinking that there should be some kind of karmic reward for the person in the "15 items or less fewer" line who splits their big cartload into two separate orders just to avoid a longer line. Seriously, I hope your milk leaks all over your bread, your wine is corked, you drop your eggs and your bananas get smushed by the cans of tomatoes after you get stuck in traffic.
According to some dumb thing on Facebook. my rapper name is "Squiggly Nasty". Umm, no.
Can I be "MC Square Root of E" instead?
its spring and it feels like its still the middle of winter
i need a new job -.- mines is tiring but glad i got more hours. yay me
The first day of spring for KATs is this coming Saturday.
Winter is coming starting on Monday.
Spring? Someone lives in a crazy world.
I was thinking about my team in Manila today and one of them pinged me later in the afternoon.
Been really busy but looks like they want me to go back later in the year for an extended time.
Will have to wait and see. They are good people and Manila was much better than I expected.
am I so different that I become invisible?
I'm thinking about how much there is left of transition. Honestly the thought is quite overwhelming...there's a likely chance I will need a revision on my chest, which is fine as I totally expected that might be the case given the approach we were taking. I'm fine with that. But then there's removing all the internal organs...which as far as I am concerned is non-negotiable to keep the risk of cancer down. Then there's the genital surgery itself...which depending on what I choose could be like a 2 or 3 part surgery. So that's like 5 surgeries.
And of course as I think about that I think about all the things I can't really do until all that is done. I won't swim or be shirtless at all until the chest is done, and even at that, it depends on the scars. I won't show scars. And in terms of dating...well, I'm girl crazy so there's a good chance if someone pretty and great comes along I will go for the girl without bottom surgery. But, at the same time, I can't really fathom dating a woman with what I currently have either. I wouldn't be stealth to a romantic interest but it's a matter of personal comfort. So that's going to be what? Like 5 years?
But then there is the whole glass half empty vs glass half full discussion. So I can't swim or go to the beach...doesn't stop me from doing any winter activities, or tons of other stuff where you generally should be clothed lol. And if I don't date...well, my life is different now than it was before. Prior to starting HRT, romantic interests were my main form of support since with estrogen, I did not get along well with others. But I can form friendships more easily and authentically now. So I can have close friends. It's also just a hell of a lot easier to navigate the world now that I don't hate everything and everyone so much.
I'm thinking that writing a love poem to my girlfriend and accidentally sending it to my ex is probably not the best thing I've ever done... really .....
^ lol, that should be interesting!! Good luck :)
Listening to Jamestown Story's " In Loving Memory" made me think. People who say they will always be there for you are just full of it. That line has been the biggest crock of ->-bleeped-<- I have ever heard! I have yet to have anyone in my life who has actually kept that promise. I think that is part of why I enjoy being on the road. I'm not out here to make friends because they do nothing but hurt you in the end. I've wanted to be proven wrong but no one has done it yet.
Maybe I just need to stop being so nice and polite, just start telling people to F off!
Speaking of trucks, I love my new truck. I miss my big rig Kenworth but this Freightliner expedite truck is nippy, I don't have to worry about a trailer and it has a full size fridge/ freezer and sink. The bottom bunk folds up into the wall and there is a table and 2 bench seats that pop up from below. I could be happy with one of these of my own.
I drove 733 miles in one day during my shift. I hauled ass! It broke my last personal best of 668.9 miles. And aside from Maine and the Carolinas, I have been to every other state in the continental US. Right now I am sitting at a TA in Denver Colorado.
I'm a girl that's going places. Heehee.
And since Canada isn't really all that far away from me..
*waves cheerfully*
HII BIRKIN.
What to do about my thin arms, especially forearms! D:
Quote from: DragonBeer on April 11, 2015, 10:16:59 AM
What to do about my thin arms, especially forearms! D:
Curls!
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQxqwjet_v5PkQDYIp_fEfVpz3DXVlQ4DrkcK0x7qA58VdGnzTTG7vYN0A)
I do actually have rather naturally curly hair
I wish mine curled more than it does, Mine just waves at people unless I cut it short.
A regular who I haven't seen in a long time came in to work today.
"Oh you look different have you done something with your hair?"
Mmm I wonder what has changed since he last saw me :P (Actually I didn't think I had changed that much besides the obvious, but for him to comment ment they must be obviously working)
I've come to realize that I enjoy driving a truck more than I thought I would. I'm going to buy my own someday. And I may just give up my pursuit of becoming a VFX artist. As much as I love the graphics work I do, there are too many artists out there, not enough jobs. I may be able to start my own trucking business eventually.
i don't know when i started, all i know is that i have developed a tendency to put on a paper-thin smile in all kinds of situations where appropriate. It's a way of infectiously keeping my spirits up in all kinds of situations and is thin enough to show i'm still quite pissed off. It seems to work as long as i take my meds too. Guess that advice wasn't so ridiculous after all. Keeps me from hitting complete rock bottom.
I definitely do not want to primarily work with children for a career. I work with children at my job, and last week, these two little boys where raising their voice loudly, saying "Hey you, are you a boy or a girl?! Hey you!" in front of everyone It was so embarrassing. It makes me want to appear more feminine for the time people, just so I can avoid the hassle. Heck, it is not like I was even dressing masculine when that happened I considered my clothes to be gender neutral, and my braids are actually pretty feminine. I guess I better prepare for more if this, since getting top surgery will only make this a more common (and maybe even a more hostile) situation for me.
oh crap, its a king o: time to do something unruly xD haha!
I had a nice weekend getaway aboard the Queen Mary. It has quite a reputation for being haunted. This morning the shower went on all by itself. Hmm...
Do not throw up Skyler...keep it all down right now...just relax and keep it down you have a full day of college ahead of you.
It's April so it's spring and like always the weather is more or less unpredictable.
But when this happens...
(https://humormetoday.files.wordpress.com/2012/12/finlandn.jpg?w=540&h=432)
IT'S NOT FUNNY.
there are not enough hours in the day to do everything needed this week >:(
Quote from: Talim on April 12, 2015, 11:06:49 AM
I've come to realize that I enjoy driving a truck more than I thought I would. I'm going to buy my own someday. And I may just give up my pursuit of becoming a VFX artist. As much as I love the graphics work I do, there are too many artists out there, not enough jobs. I may be able to start my own trucking business eventually.
It's only recently that I gave up my truck licence and I have to admit I did enjoy driving trucks. Having a truck license was really useful as a woman because whenever I wanted to move anything I'd hire a truck for the day and do it myself. Sometimes I'd get funny looks, but otherwise it was all good.
Being a mechanic before my awakening heavy traffic licences were essential and sometimes I would get roped into hauling shingle away from a docked barge to some depot or another. Hauling shingle requires careful driving and braking or else you could end up with the whole load in the cab with you which would really ruin your day. The truck I used to drive was an old thing with a big Perkins engine and I really liked it even if nobody else did that much.
Thanks Talim for making me feel all nostalgic for a while there :)
Quote from: Lady Smith on April 14, 2015, 02:09:34 AM
It's only recently that I gave up my truck licence and I have to admit I did enjoy driving trucks. Having a truck license was really useful as a woman because whenever I wanted to move anything I'd hire a truck for the day and do it myself. Sometimes I'd get funny looks, but otherwise it was all good.
Being a mechanic before my awakening heavy traffic licences were essential and sometimes I would get roped into hauling shingle away from a docked barge to some depot or another. Hauling shingle requires careful driving and braking or else you could end up with the whole load in the cab with you which would really ruin your day. The truck I used to drive was an old thing with a big Perkins engine and I really liked it even if nobody else did that much.
Thanks Talim for making me feel all nostalgic for a while there :)
Anytime
;)
My favorite truck I've driven is still the Kenworth T-680. It was black and a 13 speed. This freightliner has a big sleeper, it's got great visibility up front and backing and loading is a breeze. But the dashboard is not driver friendly or intuitive like the Kenworth.
I hate every time I get on Tumblr and I see someone refer to transgender adult men as "trans boys." It's just so infantilizing and demeaning. I've also never heard of a grown ass man calling himself a boy unless it's like "I went out with my boys last night" or something. The only time I've been referred to as a boy in an adult context is I have one friend who refers to all males as boys, but she's little and cute so it's allowed.
Yes that's the extent of my ranting for today. I actually have a ton of work and much bigger problems than this but whining about tumblr is a good distraction. ::)
why was i freaking out after seeing a spider and i was spooked by a scream mask. like seriously, never use to freak about stuff like this
I really like working out now that I have a real goal, but I hate working with a personal trainer. It sucks out all the joy I've found in exercise.
Quote from: enigmaticrorschach on April 14, 2015, 04:38:08 PM
why was i freaking out after seeing a spider and i was spooked by a scream mask. like seriously, never use to freak about stuff like this
Last week Sweetie woke me up about two, three AM. Sweetie is terrified of spiders. She was freaked out over a spider sitting on a piece of paper in the wastebasket next to the toilet. Typically spiders don't bother me.THIS WAS THE BIGGEST WOLF SPIDER I'VE EVER SEEN! I nearly jumped out of my skin! Took care of it, but...
I am badly out of shape, just going up on a neighbor's garage roof to cut away a big downed limb before it did any real damage wore me out. Plus my ankle feels a little wonky now too, but not too bad.
Did y'all hear? Hillary Clinton got lunch at a Chipotles in Ohio yesterday. She even got the extra guacamole....
This election cycle is seriously going to suck.
I don't care what others think of me but why am I criticizing myself again.
Shoot, what's a good execuse for missing jury duty...gotta call them now.
I'm digging deep and trying to find my determination with no avail. :embarrassed:
ghost march
Quote from: DragonBeer on April 15, 2015, 10:43:46 AM
Shoot, what's a good execuse for missing jury duty...gotta call them now.
I forgot because I was busy chasing leprechauns.
I was in police custody.
I was there, but nobody noticed because I am invisible.
Summons? What summons?
The summons was addressed to some chick who isn't around anymore.
No hablo Ingles.
I was abducted by aliens, no, wait, marsh monsters. Yes, that's it. Marsh monsters.
Argah bargah? Confibbledy pop. Narf?
It's against my religion.
I thought it was next month.
I'm wondering where Hillary had lunch today and if anyone recognized her....
Important stuff, people, important stuff....
The relaunch forced my hand to switch to a new computer. Apparently IE 7 is a bit outdated.
Now I have to figure out how to use a Mac.
Did I mention I hate computers when I don't have a clue what I'm doing?
Quote from: Jill F on April 15, 2015, 07:25:38 PM
Now I have to figure out how to use a Mac.
as a doorstop?
Quote from: Jill F on April 15, 2015, 07:25:38 PM
Now I have to figure out how to use a Mac.
First you melt some cheese...
today...has been a beautiful day. That is all.
Left Tennessee this morning, picked up in Kentucky this afternoon and delivering in Pennsylvania in the morning. Next load takes me back to Kentucky. I'm spoiled with this truck. It's got a full size fridge freezer, full size bed as well as the top bunk and a kitchen sink.
Today too I came within inches of hitting a deer. Stupid thing.
kinda hating being called ma'am whenever i answer a phone call. i dont wanna get called sir either though so yea. if i shave my face, wear my hoodie and my tight jeans, talk in my high voice like i normally do, i called ms basically ever other word. maybe its my non-binary attribute kicking in.
I want the construction crew finished and out of my house NOW. It's been 3 weeks and there's no end in sight. Why can't they keep my bathroom clean? Ugh. I just cleaned it yesterday and now there's mud in the sink, my towels are on the floor and now I need more Lysol.
I can't put into words how much I do NOT want to go to work today. :-\ I mean, now that surgery has left me broke I do need the money. And there are people who I have been missing that I will be happy to see after a while. And it really isn't good for me to be socially isolated for much longer as even this short period of time has given me too much time to dwell on bad things.
But I don't want the stress of the job. -_- So much pressure and just gah.
I think my face is actually flatter from all of the facepalming I've done today.
I'm beginning to think that some of these construction guys are actually brain donors.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yH97lImrr0Q
I want that tomorrow comes fast! So I can go to my partner's house and get some snuggles :(
The last semester of my course barely started and I'm stressed... A teacher I really REALLY hate came back (gosh, such a judgmental and religion-shoving person) and I'm having the worst interaction EVER with my colleagues
why did i start crying from watching digimon o:
My post-surgical garment is in the wash (it has been two weeks, ew lol). So I put on a t-shirt and am going about the house for the first time. It's...interesting. I've done it with my full chest, but obviously it wasn't socially appropriate to go outside without something on my chest to hold it in place. Now, I could go outside like this and it would be OK. Because of my fatness my surgeon opted to leave some manboob there to let it look more natural, and some people may recall me complaining that they seemed too big. They've definitely shrunk some and will continue to shrink over the next few months...but looking at it in the shirt now, I'm quite pleased for the most part. With the garment on it looks strange, because I am too flat for someone with a belly like this. Without the garment, they do look more boobish but it looks as it should for someone of my size, hopefully they shrink a bit more though and I think it will be perfect for where I'm at now.
His incisions were absolutely phenomenal as well. I can't spot the scars even at this stage and I am only 3 weeks post op (they are around the nipple) unless I look very closely. And the bruising is all gone, the only indication that I have had a surgery is that some skin still needs to tighten up but even that is minimal. Honestly given what he had to work with he did a wonderful job and I am pleased. If I lose weight and need a revision in the future he will be my choice again.
I wonder if I should pump up my bike tires and get out there...
Quote from: birkin on April 17, 2015, 03:36:37 PM
I wonder if I should pump up my bike tires and get out there...
i was thinking about the same thing
Spoke to my neuro's receptionist yesterday to tell her about my seizure. She called me a GOOD GIRL for telling her. I don't know should I be pleased that I was gendered correctly, or slightly patronized for being called a good girl
When are touring bands finally going to figure out that Orange County, Pomona and San Bernardino are NOT Los Angeles. When you play SoCal and skip Los Angeles in favor of one of these places, you are going to lose a lot in ticket sales because these places are inacessible due to traffic. You might as well be playing on the moon.
Shame on you, Glenn Danzig. Enjoy all 6 people coming to your Pomona show.
why i just got a strange chill. :icon_blink:
The monster is lurking....
i'm the king of ghosts, the monster doesnt scary me (shivers) :eusa_silenced:
Well, right now, the monster is having hot cocoa with lots of marsh mallows in it.
Not in a scary mood...
i'm wondering where my shades and ghosts went. always running around at night. like they say, "when the sun's away, the monsters come out to play." ah geez. well back to digimon
Thinking in when I became old that I'm falling asleep before 11pm? ???
Quote from: Kalex on April 17, 2015, 08:44:35 PM
Thinking in when I became old that I'm falling asleep before 11pm? ???
Look at it this way, babies fall asleep before 11 pm too.
gos how i hate being single. i feel like imma die alone in a house full of cats sometimes
Quote from: marsh monster on April 17, 2015, 08:48:20 PM
Look at it this way, babies fall asleep before 11 pm too.
Great, Im a child again! Let me sleep till noon tomorrow.
Quote from: Kalex on April 17, 2015, 09:02:32 PM
Great, Im a child again! Let me sleep till noon tomorrow.
Nah, you'll probably need changing long before then...
my ears are huge and my nose is so small.
The person who bagged my groceries today had two speeds- slow and reverse. Then I got home and found that he put all the heavy things on top of the produce. The guy they have that is developmentally disabled does a far better job and is actually friendly.
I'm thinking that this new guy won't last long.
Quote from: Jill F on April 18, 2015, 08:18:25 PM
The person who bagged my groceries today had two speeds- slow and reverse. Then I got home and found that he put all the heavy things on top of the produce. The guy they have that is developmentally disabled does a far better job and is actually friendly.
I'm thinking that this new guy won't last long.
they're liable to promote him pretty fast, he'll be a manager before long.
Quote from: marsh monster on April 18, 2015, 08:20:51 PM
they're liable to promote him pretty fast, he'll be a manager before long.
Scary to think, but I'm thinking this guy's attitude is going to bite him in the butt before he gets promoted to the level of his own incompetence.
Sometimes I think some people just don't understand my odd sense of humor
I honestly think this is my ideal hairstyle. When I get my next tattoo done on my neck, it's going to look great. I've been debating yet again about growing it long, but this looks good. I'm thinking of going a darker purple, not lavender like it is now and maybe a streak of white or just a solid purple.
http://s688.photobucket.com/user/KeairaElisabeth/media/FB_20150420_12_12_43_Saved_Picture%202_zps7ovmeig8.jpg
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fs688.photobucket.com%2Fuser%2FKeairaElisabeth%2Fmedia%2FFB_20150420_12_12_43_Saved_Picture%25202_zps7ovmeig8.jpg&hash=76787fb1ae21fc5df18fbc4bad251f7bc929ecba)
Please just let me be thinking the worst, and I'm panicking over nothing
Just made a friend on FB who is looks like Edward Cullen, only not sparkly n stuff he pulls of the vampire look very well. He's pretty cute
lol.
Thinking some people just don't get that they're being trolled.
Quote from: immortal gypsy on April 21, 2015, 06:08:56 AM
Please just let me be thinking the worst, and I'm panicking over nothing
Me too! What is up?
I'm thinking that I'm fed up with negative people trolling around and drawing pictures of doom and gloom.
Prepare for the worst, hope for the best and don't poison the atmosphere by trying to convince others that their endeavours and ambitions are doomed to fail.
We're all going to die!!!
someday...
>:-)
Personally I consider that a good thing, that means all the negative people will eventually die :)
Quote from: marsh monster on April 21, 2015, 02:47:46 PM
We're all going to die!!!
someday...
>:-)
What I first thought was a crush on me is turning into an obsession for this person. UGH. :(
Yeah, that happens. But I'm twice your age! >:-) Now quit stalking me! :laugh:
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: marsh monster on April 21, 2015, 02:47:46 PM
We're all going to die!!!
someday...
>:-)
Life is a terminal disease. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
Pass the chocolate.
what wall imma go spiderman on
Yikes, its worse now than when they first went to this.
edit: seems better now.
I know, I went and did something else. :-\
Today is the first day in over 3 weeks that I didn't have a construction crew to deal with, so I was looking forward to my day of peace and quiet. Now there's a crew next door making a serious racket. My contractor friend also just got a job three doors down and will be there for at least 6 weeks.
I'm thinking the only way that I'll get peace and quiet now is to finish the job of deafening myself with a loud Marshall stack or just cut to the chase and hammer icepicks into my eardrums.
Quote from: LordKAT on April 21, 2015, 09:40:51 AM
Me too! What is up?
I couldn't contact a friend due to the storms here. I was already thinking worst case scenario. I know they're fine now
I am wondering how to get my voice back...I woke up in the middle of the night a few nights ago and I spoke for no reason. My voice was perfect! What I had always wanted to hear. I suppose it is just a good sign and I should keep doing what I am doing.
i need a distraction. can't wait till july comes around
It's going to cost me $200 to get 3 tattoo's done. Which is pretty decent I think. And I got my dark purple hair coloring. And, if all goes well, I will have a white streak in my bangs.
Quote from: immortal gypsy on April 22, 2015, 05:26:12 PM
I couldn't contact a friend due to the storms here. I was already thinking worst case scenario. I know they're fine now
I'm glad they are OK.
My nephew had a play last week and he had to wear green because it were supposed to be frogs on some swamp/forest. While most kids had on a normal, solid type of green, my nephew performed in an oversized button-down green camouflage shirt. Guess who idea was that? Lol. My sister didn't want to get the shirt
but I guess I talked her into it. Our other sister pointed it out that he was the only one in camo, and his mom said she will never let me influence her on what do buy for her son again, LOL! My nephew was looking like Gunnery Sergeant Hartman in that play, haha! He looked like he was about destroy the entire rain forest and kill everything that moved. I wish I could have been there to see it, but his mom showed me a couple of clips from her phone. The shirt was actually so dark green that it looked brown. At any rate, I'm so proud of my nephew.
Good news, no more facial hair. Bad news, face full of welts, red and swollen. Faith No More concert tomorrow. I'm thinking it's a cakeup kind of day tomorrow.
I got 3 aphthas (I think that this is how it's called) under my tongue due not eating and over stressing.
They hurt SO REALLY BAD. :-X
WWNHD :laugh:
Thinking in a way to skip classes tomorrow cause my dad have a thing to do all the morning and I want to stay at home.
Life's perty good. Eatin' a peach.
Hey does anyone know how to fix my fax machine? I think my profile got screwed up a few days ago posting.
Yes I post via fax.
HWNHT :laugh:
Apparently my mom set me up to catch me and now I cant use the Internet until Monday. No one can believe that im over 18...
Beer good. Can someone get me one?
my voice is recovering from what happened earlier this week.
Greetings !
I'm a new one & i'm happy to find this cozy place .
I think about my futur & how can i kill my sadness !
Best regards !
I'm wondering how many more "What made you happy today, for mtf members only" threads will be created.
Quote from: marsh monster on April 25, 2015, 07:49:45 AM
I'm wondering how many more "What made you happy today, for mtf members only" threads will be created.
Seconded!
Why MtF only? Don't the guys get to say what made them happy too?
Quote from: Rainbow Dash on April 25, 2015, 11:07:59 AM
Why MtF only? Don't the guys get to say what made them happy too?
They're not allowed to get so emotional...
Oh,right. Whoever heard of a man expressing his feelings. That's just an absurd concept.:P
The picture thread cesspool is overflowing again! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 25, 2015, 11:21:08 AM
The picture thread cesspool is overflowing again! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
It'd be nice to get dinner with the show, wouldn't it?
Quote from: marsh monster on April 25, 2015, 11:26:53 AM
It'd be nice to get dinner with the show, wouldn't it?
LOL! You got that right!
get to go watch The Age of Adaline today with my older brother since he is down for the weekend.
WWIDIIWN :laugh:
We might be getting a pair of rats (females most likely) in couple weeks... My friend raises them and one little rat in particular melted my heart completely. ;w; They're so cute.
Quote from: Tossu-sama on April 25, 2015, 01:31:01 PM
We might be getting a pair of rats (females most likely) in couple weeks... My friend raises them and one little rat in particular melted my heart completely. ;w; They're so cute.
Hoodeds or albinos?
Quote from: Rainbow Dash on April 25, 2015, 11:19:42 AM
Oh,right. Whoever heard of a man expressing his feelings. That's just an absurd concept.:P
*sobbing*
Hehehehe
Quote from: Dee Walker on April 25, 2015, 02:06:16 PM
Hoodeds or albinos?
At least one will be clearly a black and white one, don't know yet about the other one for sure. A little black one with only a tiny dot of white on her belly might be the one. :)
The funny thing is that there are two litters of rats, in both cases the parents are husky rats but none of the babies have inherited that coloration. :'D Genes are fun.
I wonder how this family meeting concerning transition, top surgery and future is going to be...
I know what I want to do in life but I don't think my parents are going to be thrilled.
I have a busy day today. I am debating if I should walk to the furthest Gamestop to buy a game I had once. According to Google maps, it would be about 4.9 miles just to get there. I also have a physical in the morning, which I will be walking to. I wonder if I'm going to have the stamina to get back. Then my sister will be leaving for Africa later on that night, so I'm going to try and go with her to the airport.
Sometimes I wonder how nice I am. Most people would consider me nice but I think sometimes I am too quick to judge others. I feel bad for it. I know it's mostly a defence mechanism because I've had bad experiences, but still.
I also have to forgive my client. She lied to me and she betrayed my trust in her. I knew better but I wanted to place responsibility in her hands and sure enough she abused it. I have to see her tomorrow too...ugh. No idea how that day is going to go. Sometimes I just want to leave that place, I need to get a career path going so I don't end up falling into it permanently.
I've had three seizures in ten days, what is going on? I haven't done anything different from normal but I'm starting to get tired of wondering if my brain is going to behave itself each day.
I hope I'm just going through a slight bump with my epilepsy and nothing too serious. I've been away from hospitals for a long time, I really don't want to start visiting the emergency rooms again.
Sorry to hear that Gypsy. I hope it's just a slight bump and nothing more major going on. Hugs
Mariah
How I'm finding it increasingly frustrating that as I un-repress myself and unwind I'm more often than not unsure about what I really want and what I pretended I wanted.
Quote from: Mariah2014 on April 27, 2015, 09:19:07 AM
Sorry to hear that Gypsy. I hope it's just a slight bump and nothing more major going on. Hugs
Mariah
Thanks Mariah. I am sooo hoping this is just a bump. I've had periods where my neuro has had to jack up my meds to max levels then try new ones to try and get me under control again. Seizures I can live with (have since a teen). It's the feeling of helpless then and not being able to work sometimes the next day that is a major hassle
I didn't realize until today that I was apparently supposed to be a member of a clique here. I'm thinking that I have no clue who else is in it.
Quote from: Jill F on April 28, 2015, 03:19:29 AM
I didn't realize until today that I was apparently supposed to be a member of a clique here. I'm thinking that I have no clue who else is in it.
About 17,600 others. One hell of a clique :laugh:
Quote from: Cindy on April 28, 2015, 03:31:54 AM
About 17,600 others. One hell of a clique :laugh:
Couldn't see.the forest for the trees?
Quote from: immortal gypsy on April 28, 2015, 02:57:34 AM
Thanks Mariah. I am sooo hoping this is just a bump. I've had periods where my neuro has had to jack up my meds to max levels then try new ones to try and get me under control again. Seizures I can live with (have since a teen). It's the feeling of helpless then and not being able to work sometimes the next day that is a major hassle
hugs Gypsy, fingers X'd that it is just a hiccough for you.
In the UK where I used to live, we had a neighbour that suffered Epilepsy, I recall it was the first time I'd seen or witnessed it, we all felt so helpless, apart from looking after her children at our home during attacks... after making sure she was comfortable and seeking help etc... Until she would call us and say she felt OK again, or her husband came home.
She basically said the same thing to us, she'd been coping and living with it since she was a kid, I recall admiring her matter of fact attitude and level headedness, amazing!
L Katy :-*
Someone I know is fairly suicidal, and I know that it usually pops up in response when one relationship she has is in jeopardy. But she'll never outright say it, she will make up some other reason why she's been taken to that point and I have caught her in lies. I noticed the pattern and decided to confront her on it yesterday because her life is starting to be ruined. I said "I think this is the real reason why you've been feeling this way and I want you to know you're not alone. But I think that you need to talk to this person about the state of your relationship rather than get to this point, because it's starting to impact your life and not in a good way." She got super duper quiet...she was clearly quite emotional and upset at the topic being brought up but was very careful with her words. I think she's afraid I'll tell this person what she said if she confesses to it, but I don't have a doubt in my mind most of her suicidal behaviour is a call for help from this person. But she was trying to end the conversation at all costs lol, using humour, changing the topic, etc.
Honestly I really shouldn't be worrying about this girl right now though as I have my own life. But I can't help it when I feel like I'm looking at 18 year old me again.
Birkin, You doing the right and thing and are a wonderful friend to them for doing so. Our experiences make us who we are and when we can use those experiences to help others and me even possibly avoid some of the mistakes we made then that's great. Hugs
Mariah
I have to write this somewhere. I'm so ready to move to the next step of transition, seeing an endo, but my wife thinks I'm moving too fast. She's already allowed me to laser hair treatment and go to group dressed. And that should be enough for me because I said 3 months ago I wasn't even going to do that much. I get that, but I feel like I've wasted so much of my life so far, I just want to keep moving forward. I know it's a marathon, not a sprint, but right now I feel like I'm crawling through molasses. I know I still have a lot of weight to lose and I risk losing my wife if I push her too hard, but my dysphoria is just hitting me do hard lately. Thanks for letting me vent.
Quote from: Jill F on April 28, 2015, 03:19:29 AM
I didn't realize until today that I was apparently supposed to be a member of a clique here. I'm thinking that I have no clue who else is in it.
Hon, you're a potato. Your clique is ketchup, gravy, and sour cream! Get that chip off your shoulder.
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: ChiGirl on April 28, 2015, 11:16:19 AM
I have to write this somewhere. I'm so ready to move to the next step of transition, seeing an endo, but my wife thinks I'm moving too fast. She's already allowed me to laser hair treatment and go to group dressed. And that should be enough for me because I said 3 months ago I wasn't even going to do that much. I get that, but I feel like I've wasted so much of my life so far, I just want to keep moving forward. I know it's a marathon, not a sprint, but right now I feel like I'm crawling through molasses. I know I still have a lot of weight to lose and I risk losing my wife if I push her too hard, but my dysphoria is just hitting me do hard lately. Thanks for letting me vent.
Big hug! Venting is on the house! You're making steps, they'll add up behind you, where they belong. :)
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: ChiGirl on April 28, 2015, 11:16:19 AM
I have to write this somewhere. I'm so ready to move to the next step of transition, seeing an endo, but my wife thinks I'm moving too fast. She's already allowed me to laser hair treatment and go to group dressed. And that should be enough for me because I said 3 months ago I wasn't even going to do that much. I get that, but I feel like I've wasted so much of my life so far, I just want to keep moving forward. I know it's a marathon, not a sprint, but right now I feel like I'm crawling through molasses. I know I still have a lot of weight to lose and I risk losing my wife if I push her too hard, but my dysphoria is just hitting me do hard lately. Thanks for letting me vent.
I think we all do that, "this will be enough, honey, I just need to XXX to be happy", then after XXX other things haunt my mind. I've stopped making promises. It just hurts us both. I almost think Sweetie is sitting there now thinking " get on with it."
I worry a bit. Summer is coming, our complex has a pool and in the fall we're going on a cruise. Should I change my passport? Can I look enough like a man that much longer? What about the pool and the beaches? I can't go there as a man, the girls measure out as a D. That's too big for man-boobs even with a 40 inch chest.
echo echo echo all around, how many waves did I just sound ;D
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1m0lQ1ICRwI&index=1&list=LL4XKOg5COGzcjea2NHp8Uvg
I like to listen to this Navy Seal workout video as background noise from time to time. I even plan to put this video on in the future when I sleep. The cadences and war cries are soothing to me. Maybe one day I can keep up with the jumping jacks and half jumping jacks. That would be awesome. The Navy Seals are freaking awesome. I wonder if females would ever be allowed in there, provided they can pass the exact tests as the men. I wonder if transmen would even be allowed to serve there, not that I'd serve there in particular.
Speaking of military, I wonder if/when transgender individuals will be allowed to openly serve in the military. I suspect that will happen in the future, but I wonder how the PFT will be administered, if there would be any changes to that, and how the military would address pre-op/non-op/pre-hormone vs post-op/homes transgendered individuals. There would definitely be intricate details that would have to be smoothed out, but I am very interested to see this happen. I know if that were the case, I'd join as a transman if I met the weight requirements and passed could pass the PFT test. It was something I had to think hard about: millitary or transition, which ultimately, it is more important for me to be dressed in the physical scars of transition than the uniform. At this point, I'm horribly out of shape so I wouldn't get in anyway, but I know that I will eventually be physically better in the future because I have to be in order to get a phalloplasty, so there's some overlapping there. I want the graft to be taken from my thigh, so naturally my goal is to have them become smaller. I'm trying to get there now. I walked 3.2 miles yesterday, which was awesome! I'm trying to get in more walking to start slow so I won't take any damage to my knees and/or shins from all of the extra weight I have on me.
I wonder if I should just join NYSC or take Muay Thai boxing classes instead.
I think I have to barf. Stupid leftover Chinese food...
Excuse me.
Our rat plans had little changes. Instead of females we're gonna get two male rats and we're getting them already tomorrow. c: Fun fun fun~
Most of this world makes me feel like throwing up
another issue has popped up at work. Thing is, I already go to the boss with a lot,of concerns. I don't want to be the "nark." But I don't want to let go of issues that I think are serious either.
All I know is I am not working in human services anymore. I work with good people, yes, who are invested in the betterment of the lives of the people we help. But I also work with effed up, selfish, indulgent, and lazy people. It grosses me out and they make me ashamed to be in social work.
I'm thinking that Chinese leftovers probably are best eaten within 24 hours when cold. Unfortunately my microwave is dead and I had no good way of reheating it.
I'm just really glad (and lucky) that I was up close and personal with a freshly cleaned toilet today.
See, I'm barfy and have a dead appliance, but I still feel kind of lucky here.
Holy crap, I'm freaking Pollyanna.
I love Winona Ryder. And Mia Kirshner.
Tomorrow I get back to driving big rig. I'm driving team with a classmate of mine who is a really great guy. We both share similar interests so thats great. If he hadn't asked me back, I would have gone somewhere else. I'm loyal to my friends I guess. What's funny is every now and again I catch him looking over at me, as if he is trying to figure me out. Its not in a creepy way either, more like out of concern. Anyway, in 6 months he will be free of his contract with celadon. Then, I am going solo. A friend of mine says this other company is waiting for me to get done with this gig. Then, when I go with this other company, I get a huge bump in pay and my own truck. She also spoke really highly of me to her friend. I could hear her over the phone while she was getting drunk. lol. I swear she is like a real life Faye Valentine. she drinks, smokes, has the same expressions on her face and is gorgeous and smart. I have a bit of a crush on her I think. lol.
Maybe these friends will stick around for a while.
Well, tonight got weird. My wife and I went out to dinner and the waitress called my wife "sir" and me "ma'am". Seriously, my wife was wearing full makeup, dangly earrings and had DD cleavage on display. We'll say she didn't exactly get a great tip.
Wow, I decided to jog in place listening to Navy Seal cadences while washing dishes. It wasn't a full blown jog, but that actually made me drip a bead of sweat! I had fun chanting the cadences along with them, and it actually made me want to continue jogging when I wanted to stop. I did stop between the periods when the next song started, and when the commercials on Youtube, but even then, I chose to skip some of the ads when they were too long. I wanted to keep going! I hate washing dishes, but this made it really fun for me, I plan on playing cadences whenever I do them now, baring my period (which, btw, I go to check when the next one comes on because it should be about time now.) I was actually kind of feeling it in my legs. Oh, and I loved the war cries......one of my favorite parts! I've got to buy the actual CD and copy it to my PSP and do this more often. Too bad it is pretty expensive ($14-$17), so I really got to think about it. Now I have less than two minutes to get ready to walk to the bus stop to go to work, and take out the trash.
I was reading something and all of a sudden I started thinking about kids. Like "when I'm a dad how will I deal with this when it comes up." Wtf. :/ I'm indifferent about kids. If a woman wants them I'll be ok with it, if she doesn't I will be ok with it. But the idea is nice sometimes. To settle down and teach them what's good. To want to be proud of my babies lol.
At 08:00 tomorrow we roll out. Meanwhile, I am watching SLC Punk. Talk about a messed up movie, lol. I think I'm going to buy a few cosplay costumes to wear. I think it will be both interesting and fun to deliver loads as someone from the Attack on Titan Scout Regiment, or pick up a load as Motoko Kusanagi or a Starfleet Officer.
I've seen some people with MADE IN U.S.A. tattoos :eusa_think: What if everyone had their country of origin stamped
(laser branded?) on their butts at the time of birth? LOL
Mine would say State of Apprehension :laugh:
i'm hurting -.- and i'm freezing though its 72 degrees in my house
I'm thinking either hot cocoa or juice. Might go with juice since I should drink it before it goes bad.
Some people sure do get some stupid tattoos....
I hate it when I go to the store and there's some jerk there who obviously navigates through life on Autobigot :P
My niece killed an ant on our porch today. That made me really sad. That ant wasn't bothering anyone, and yet she ended it's life. Poor ant....R.I.P. At least you don't have to worry about finding food anymore. I'll admit, I used to do the same thing when I was little, but now I have come to respect many God's creatures., especially if they are outside. Now inside the house is another story. Yeah spiders are on my "kill first, ask questions never" list, and those hopping crickets that look like spiders. I feel more bad for trees being chopped down and grass being cut than those critters....
i dont wanna go to work tomorrow -.-
Quote from: V M on May 02, 2015, 07:42:50 PM
I hate it when I go to the store and there's some jerk there who obviously navigates through life on Autobigot :P
Yeah I know, millions of years of evolution and we still end up with knuckle draggers running around loose. I know I'm not supposed to say things like that, but I'm only human.
So hungry.
I'm sad that I'm so ignorant of all the fears that cis people have toward trans people. I wish I could teach them the tolerance that their idols while growing up, could not.
When you reach the part where the heartaches come,
the hero would be me.
Heroes often fail.
And you won't read that book again
Because the ending's just too hard to take.
I walk away like a movie star
Who gets burned in a three way script.
Enter number two,
A movie queen to play the scene
Of bringing all the good things out in me,
But for now love lets be real.
I never thought I could act this way
And I've got to say that I just don't get it.
I don't know where we went wrong
But the feelings gone and I just can't get it back.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5tr_L31StI
my dog, doesnt recognize my scent anymore o: he just stares at me and even growls at me whenever i come home. :'(
I like my new codriver. But I dont want too much of an emotional attachment to him. In 6 months I'm going to another trucking company and I'm going to be driving solo. I'll be making more money and I'll have a brand new truck. Apparently this company which is very small, is waiting on me because they understand loyalty to friends and family.
I hate to be like that but people keep showing me that it's the best way to be in life. And it's the same with our truck. I can't rely on it either it seems.
God, I've changed so much in just 6 months.
Wondering if I'm making a huge mistake of riding a bike to work instead of taking the bus...
Considering it should start raining today it just might be a terrible mistake.
Quote from: Tossu-sama on May 06, 2015, 02:08:00 AM
Wondering if I'm making a huge mistake of riding a bike to work instead of taking the bus...
Considering it should start raining today it just might be a terrible mistake.
Haha this mistake is familiar to me. Except in my case I overestimated my cycling abilities and wore myself out so bad.
Give it a couple of days and the muscles will catch up, in the last week I've been reminded of this doing inclines which left me out of breath one year ago, now it seems like nothing. it's all relative.
Quote from: Adam (birkin) on May 06, 2015, 12:05:04 PM
Haha this mistake is familiar to me. Except in my case I overestimated my cycling abilities and wore myself out so bad.
Quote from: antonia on May 06, 2015, 05:52:38 PM
Give it a couple of days and the muscles will catch up, in the last week I've been reminded of this doing inclines which left me out of breath one year ago, now it seems like nothing. it's all relative.
That's good to know. I really need to commit to daily bike rides to get back into it.
--
I'm thinking about how I feel bad that things fell out with the one friend at work. I have no one to blame but myself. :( I really messed up. But I reconnected with my other friend. We had a nice night last night, I'm slowly getting more comfortable around her, I'm hoping that we can start doing other activities together so that I get to know her really well. She's a nice girl and she's a good person to have in my life because she has clear boundaries and she really has it together.
She also calls me out on my distorted thinking about myself or situations I am in if I am not in a great mood, kind of brings me down to earth a bit.
Might as well recycle this post. :laugh:
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 25, 2015, 11:21:08 AM
The picture thread cesspool is overflowing again! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
There, I'm saving the environment! :laugh:
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 07, 2015, 12:33:00 PM
Might as well recycle this post. :laugh:
There, I'm saving the environment! :laugh:
lol, I had to say something...
my signature line says it all, lol
Mom will be eating me for dinner tonight. This haircut might get her pissed. XD
Quote from: DragonBeer on May 07, 2015, 05:11:22 PM
Mom will be eating me for dinner tonight. This haircut might get her pissed. XD
Wrong thread! :laugh:
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 07, 2015, 05:43:41 PM
Wrong thread! :laugh:
No, that's actually what I thought. XD
"Dragon, it's what's for dinner!" :laugh:
Conway Transport tried to recruit me today, saying they really appreciate women truck drivers and there is a $1000 sign on bonus. I declined. I'm helping my class mate/ co-driver out. Then I'm going to another company.
Still, it's amazing to have recruiters practically bashing down the door to hire me. I've never had that happen. I'm glad I put my CDL before everything else because it's job stability like I've never had.
I've even been considering giving up on being a full time VFX artist.
Someday we will look back at this moment and plow into a parked car.
I need a punch in my face cause I have a test on Monday morning and I havent studied yet
I'm thinking, like often, what the hell am I going to do with my life from now on..
I love all of the little cheap trinkets I can get from China on Ebay.
I need to call in the morning to find out if my truck has been fixed. If so it will be time to get back on the road. My Co-driver is on home time in South Carolina. My Aunt and her Cousin (Who I've always called an aunt) only live 30 minutes away from his home. I might be able to see them when I go pick him up. I havent seen any of them in probably 18 years. They know of my transition but, that's about it I think. I wish my parents were closer to get to.
And, I am so glad they will never read this. But, I think I have a crush on another truck driver. She is gorgeous, smart and has been through a lot in her life.
Sweetie suggested that maybe I should get a CDL but driving the highway in the rain at night gives me panic attacks.
I'm thinking that I'm very happy now that warm weather has finally arrived.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on May 08, 2015, 07:29:57 AM
Sweetie suggested that maybe I should get a CDL but driving the highway in the rain at night gives me panic attacks.
If that's the case, pursuing your CDL probably isnt a good idea. We drive in all weather unless it's extreme or heavy snow or the road is too icy.
My truck isnt ready. So I'm probably stuck here for the weekend.
In the past, my mother has told me that I can talk to her about anything, and I would tell her that I would hold her to that one day. Part of me kind of hopes that she says this again, so it can sort of "open a door" for me to come out to her. It is getting harder for me to hold it in. I know I will have to in a couple of months, but dang, I just wish she would be supportive, but I know she won't.
Got our first TS of the year, Ana. Its supposed to come in below me though and then turn northeast.
Really? No transsexuals have signed up yet this year?
Idk im in a confusion ray. ???
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 08, 2015, 06:24:34 PM
Really? No transsexuals have signed up yet this year?
smart alec. I'm talking about a tropical storm.
;D Batten down the hatches! You're on the safe side of it from the sound of things. Stay dry!
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 08, 2015, 07:14:24 PM
;D Batten down the hatches! You're on the safe side of it from the sound of things. Stay dry!
Hugs, Devlyn
rain, some wind for the next several days. Been seeing rain bands go by all day today. Rain, sun, rain, sun, etc.
I'm still hoping for a mild year due to el nino.
Rain dances feature whole bands now?
I need a higher-paying job.
I actually believed I had a true friend ::) I must be the dumbest person in the whole freakin' world
Quote from: V M on May 08, 2015, 10:21:21 PM
I actually believed I had a true friend ::) I must be the dumbest person in the whole freakin' world
Sorry you got burned. It happens I'm afraid *hugs* I've had it happen so much that I dont even bother trying to make or keep friends. the last one cut my heart pretty deep.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DRkgH7Uu-hA
I have had a hell of a two weeks. Most of it is work related. I'm not cut out to be a social worker. I have the heart, the compassion, the empathy...it has been my strength but it has also ended up being too much for me I guess. The child abuse and the effects it has on these kids is too much for me, it's making me wonder how I can even live in a world where stuff like this happens. I feel like I've seen too much.
I look like hell and I feel like hell. Let a friend down today because I couldn't even get out of bed. I also was an idiot and gave up my weekend. I had a nice long one, but others got burned out and no one could cover their shifts so I took them and now my 4 day weekend has become 1 day off. :(
Quote from: Adam (birkin) on May 09, 2015, 12:14:18 PM
I have had a hell of a two weeks. Most of it is work related. I'm not cut out to be a social worker. I have the heart, the compassion, the empathy...it has been my strength but it has also ended up being too much for me I guess. The child abuse and the effects it has on these kids is too much for me, it's making me wonder how I can even live in a world where stuff like this happens. I feel like I've seen too much.
I look like hell and I feel like hell. Let a friend down today because I couldn't even get out of bed. I also was an idiot and gave up my weekend. I had a nice long one, but others got burned out and no one could cover their shifts so I took them and now my 4 day weekend has become 1 day off. :(
Being a social worker is a really tough job. I worked for the adult mental health service for eight years and while I loved my job it ultimately broke my health and I had to take early retirement. You're right we get to see too much and it wears us down. I didn't have to deal with child abuse, but working in Triage like I did suicide was always a major stressor.
The advice we were given as mental health staff was that if we didn't look after ourselves we couldn't look after others, but more often than not the clinic staff I worked with looked as badly stressed out as the clients/patients we were trying to help.
i think imma end up in tears if i keep listening to this song
Quote from: Echo Alcestis on May 09, 2015, 04:19:05 PM
i think imma end up in tears if i keep listening to this song
Is it a song you posted? Am curious what it is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFnajsxYTME
its from the movie in your eyes
*sigh*
My classmates keep calling and asking me for advice, help and information regarding trucking. It's like they think I have all the answers and 30 yrs experience. I'm still a rookie, they were in my class with me. And that's why we have trainers. Why call me?
Thought 1: I really hope i can make friends here ^^
Thought 2: i found a dog today on the streets and i soo am in love with him. When the owners get him back ill be a bit Hurt. Maybe a bit selfish to say but i hope i can keep this sweety.
Thought 3: why cant i sleep at 5 am yet? Oh yea i slept til 3pm.... ->-bleeped-<- me
I wanna sleep more but I have to get up for work :(
I think people who have a job should be thankful
One never knows when the day will come when they will no longer be able work
oh shush VM xD I am happy I do have a job. hell knows how much I suffered trying to find one lol
Why do i feel a bit down? I dont know... I hope ill feel more happy soon.. Guess its paranoia
Still feel a bit weird today. I think it will be a long time before I try smoking pot again.
Quote from: Echo Alcestis on May 10, 2015, 08:14:05 AM
oh shush VM xD I am happy I do have a job. hell knows how much I suffered trying to find one lol
My comment was a general comment and not particularly directed towards you, your rude reply is not appreciated
oh i:'m sry if I was rude [emoji20]
Actual thoughts occupying my mind have been the 70th anniversary of VE DAY, various reflections regarding Mother's Day and the future direction of the world in regards to a variety of issues
I met one of the most amazing human beings ever two nights ago. I barely know her but I wish that I could know her. She made me feel seen for the first time in a very long time.
Also, I need to go rescue my driver's license that a store kept on accident. Haha.
Ha, I was right. Mom just had to mention the TAILS when I told her about our rats. :D Can't understand what's so terrible about them anyway.
Jeez. Mood Swings are So ->-bleeped-<-ty..
I hope I don't screw up at that group job interview tomorrow.
Dragonbeer, good luck with the interview. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: V M on May 10, 2015, 08:05:51 AM
I think people who have a job should be thankful
One never knows when the day will come when they will no longer be able work
Aye. One day in 2008 our boss walked in and said "Don't come to work tomorrow, the IRS will have the place padlocked." And that was the end of that.
I'm thinking of how low my self restrant is, no will power. I'm trying to stop any smoking for my surgery in 2 weeks & also on the Atkins diet. Today I went all day without a single cig, then just snapped, drove to the c store, bought the nasty things & now have smoked 2. Damn, they are gross, stain my teeth, taste nasty, so addicted to that drug I guess.
omg! texting while walking is as dangerous as texting while driving .-. almost got hit. need to stop doing that
Sent from my VS985 4G using Tapatalk
Why can't I get comfortable with my chosen name? I like "Charlotte" but I loved "Caitlin." And I can't use it. So Charlotte feels like a compromise. And I'm sick of compromising! I want to be me!
I need to get a car .-. I hate waiting for this bus
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Quote from: marsh monster on May 10, 2015, 08:30:52 AM
Still feel a bit weird today. I think it will be a long time before I try smoking pot again.
I quit that stuff a few years back. I don't need or want that stuff anymore. I kind of miss alcohol. But, that's because I could actually control my drinking. Then, I went on medication for my panic attacks and I couldn't drink anymore. It kind of sucks.
I will never understand the appeal of those Lifetime movies where women are abused. Before my transition, they just made me roll my eyes and think to myself: "Wow..this is really stupid." But now, when I watch it, I think: "Jeez, this makes me so uncomfortable". It's kind of weird, though, because I could watch documentaries on serial killers all day and it doesn't phase me at all.
What I did for my mom seeing her and saying happy Mother's Day to her.Loved the card I gave her.Gave her the best gift too,my twin sister took a picture of us with me dressed as Tori.
I have a test tomorrow (like in 9 hours). Thinking in how I'm gonna pass the exam, I couldnt memorize everything D:
Quote from: Lady Smith on May 09, 2015, 12:52:53 PM
Being a social worker is a really tough job. I worked for the adult mental health service for eight years and while I loved my job it ultimately broke my health and I had to take early retirement. You're right we get to see too much and it wears us down. I didn't have to deal with child abuse, but working in Triage like I did suicide was always a major stressor.
The advice we were given as mental health staff was that if we didn't look after ourselves we couldn't look after others, but more often than not the clinic staff I worked with looked as badly stressed out as the clients/patients we were trying to help.
Yeah...I get the same advice, to look after myself, but I fail at it pretty badly. =/ I just don't think I am meant for it, now I'm just trying to re-evaluate my direction.
Quote from: Adam (birkin) on May 10, 2015, 09:37:38 PM
Yeah...I get the same advice, to look after myself, but I fail at it pretty badly. =/ I just don't think I am meant for it, now I'm just trying to re-evaluate my direction.
What about going back to teaching? Doesnt have to be at the University, it could be somewhere else. You have a car now so that helps. I cant see you in retail. Forget factories, you wont be happy there. You're great with people. It's something I loved about you. And do something about that Thesis! finish it or quit. There's no sense putting it off.
I wonder if the U.S will ever adopt the metric system. Gosh I hope not. I don't feel like learning these things over again. I'll stick with the non-metric system. It makes me feel special.
Oh sweet. I got published in the New York Times.
Quote from: DragonBeer on May 12, 2015, 08:02:39 AM
Oh sweet. I got published in the New York Times.
Cool!
Quote from: DragonBeer on May 12, 2015, 08:02:39 AM
Oh sweet. I got published in the New York Times.
That's pretty rockin' 8) What did you write?
Quote from: V M on May 12, 2015, 09:05:26 AM
That's pretty rockin' 8) What did you write?
They were featuring transgender stories so I submitted my own:
http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/projects/storywall/transgender-today/stories/damien-coppersan
Congratulations, Dragonbeer.
I'm extremely hot that I'm turning red
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Wondering if Echo is a sexy communist. If not, wondering if Echo is approaching heat stroke. Perhaps a cool drink and some shade are in order.
I'm thinking Dee might have a point o: but not today xD its just really hot outside and I have to stand and wait for my buses to take me home
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Don't forget your aluminum-foil hat
2nd job interview on Thursday...shoot, I better prepare.
i need a fan. i feel like i'm on fire -.-
Stoma stuff
g0t a blister on my toe :'(
My brain is short circuiting
Quote from: MichelleZelda on May 12, 2015, 09:34:12 PM
My brain is short circuiting
Made for a good movie though.
I have had enough of the heavy rain and wind.
Top posting should be against the law...
OK, so there must be some serious idiots out there for me to have received a thing in the mail from the gas company.
Apparently you shouldn't jackhammer near gas lines, look for gas leaks with an open flame or attempt to open up your gas meter at any time.
Really? They need to explicitly tell you that these things aren't good ideas? So what I'm guessing is that some serious mouthbreathers out there done won themselves some Darwin awards and because of the lawsuits that followed (even dumber!), their attorneys thought it would be best to insult the intelligence of everyone else who isn't already dead.
Screw them. I have things to do, like stare at the sun with a telescope, remove earwax with an icepick, and give myself a cool Mike Tyson tattoo with a rusty guitar string in a fountain pen.
When hooking up lpg stuff, I've used an open flame to check for leaks. its not like the flame is going to go into a line with no oxygen in it...
Quote from: Jill F on May 13, 2015, 04:53:29 PM
OK, so there must be some serious idiots out there for me to have received a thing in the mail from the gas company.
Apparently you shouldn't jackhammer near gas lines, look for gas leaks with an open flame or attempt to open up your gas meter at any time.
Really? They need to explicitly tell you that these things aren't good ideas? So what I'm guessing is that some serious mouthbreathers out there done won themselves some Darwin awards and because of the lawsuits that followed (even dumber!), their attorneys thought it would be best to insult the intelligence of everyone else who isn't already dead.
Screw them. I have things to do, like stare at the sun with a telescope, remove earwax with an icepick, and give myself a cool Mike Tyson tattoo with a rusty guitar string in a fountain pen.
:D :D
Such is life in this day and age.
Don't microwave your dog to dry her fur, either.
i now know how a bird feels. i'm flying high and there aint no way i can come back down *whoosh* best days to come every, yet i'm not looking forward to the crash and bash affect later ;D
so apparently, there are enough cats that need rescuing from trees that they are starting a series on animal planet about it.
Mainly thinking of what I'm thinking of and what to write of my thoughts, those are my current thoughts.. I'm also thinking I should go to bed. I'm also thinking about a friend of mine. And also thinking whether I should watch stuff on netflix or just watch videos on youtube..
Today was such a nice day. It is such a relief to being more of a nice complete woman. Plastic surgery in about 10 days for liposuction & a tummy tuck with some facial surgery. My body & face will look so much nicer after I heal up. I cannot wait to see what my new dress size will be, maybe a 12 or loose 14. I just love a fitted pretty dress.
Thinking about my step dad and his family,his mom passed away this morning.It hit me hard too,she loved me a lot although I was not her bio grandson and she was a positive role model in my life.
Well, that went well today at the court house. Not quite what I was hoping to get for a number, but it's over. 10 years after the fact it ends.
Starvation is never a pretty thing
i over slept. loving not being an insomniac anymore ;D
Quote from: Echo Alcestis on May 15, 2015, 08:29:48 AM
i over slept. loving not being an insomniac anymore ;D
I used to have issues with that as a child. Then i started drinking herbal tea, which really helped me. Now it seems to be the opposite. I sleep all too well and too early.
Why? Here's what I suspect:
i suffer from depression. depression often brings with it a lack of energy.
Here's me drinking way more caffeine than healthy, being too wired to notice that effect.
Aaand here's me drinking way less caffeine than usual, finally noticing and suffering from a lack of energy.
Seriously, i can't enjoy my weekends or holidays all that much, as i sleep much of the day and get tired early (at 10-10:30 PM).
I'm wishing they had sentenced that bomber kid to life in prison instead of death. Just seems that he's getting the easy way out and this will still drag on due to the appeals process. At least if he were in a super max for the rest of his life, it would be much harder on him and actually seem like real punishment.
I'm glad he got death. This wasn't an act of rage triggered by some event, it was carefully planned out. May his victims rest in peace and the people he hurt put their lives back together.
true the guy should of got life, but some believe that him still breathing violates the victim's legacy
Why would anyone want to disturb a racoon?
Chilli and garlic peas are yum :)
We really need an exterminator.....
For the first time in my life, I want to buy myself new clothes :o
Quote from: King Malachite on May 16, 2015, 01:54:24 AM
We really need an exterminator.....
Seems extreme but...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fvignette2.wikia.nocookie.net%2Funderworld-empire%2Fimages%2F9%2F98%2FLieutenant_the_exterminator.png%2Frevision%2Flatest%3Fcb%3D20140702140046&hash=b58eeeba3bdbc7303a217f9cca6b13e02068a4ce)
Quote from: King Malachite on May 16, 2015, 01:54:24 AM
We really need an exterminator.....
The spiders know you hate them, so they push your boundaries. Learn to co-exist with them in harmony.
Quote from: marsh monster on May 15, 2015, 02:45:34 PM
I'm wishing they had sentenced that bomber kid to life in prison instead of death. Just seems that he's getting the easy way out and this will still drag on due to the appeals process. At least if he were in a super max for the rest of his life, it would be much harder on him and actually seem like real punishment.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 15, 2015, 02:52:02 PM
I'm glad he got death. This wasn't an act of rage triggered by some event, it was carefully planned out. May his victims rest in peace and the people he hurt put their lives back together.
This guy was given refuge in our country and showed his gratitude by carrying out a terrorist attack which murdered and maimed innocent people at a festive annual event
I think they should make a televised event of it complete with BBQ parties and the whole bit
I think they should build a gallows on the back of a flat bed truck and drive it down the street in slow procession then park it at the finish line where the bombings took place, string him up and get it done and over with
Might cause a few would be terrorists to think twice about messing with us in the future
I'm thinking about my top surgery coming up and getting super stoked and super nervous!
I can't wait for the new Faith No More CD to be released next week!! :icon_dance:
Quote from: V M on May 16, 2015, 02:00:27 PM
This guy was given refuge in our country and showed his gratitude by carrying out a terrorist attack which murdered and maimed innocent people at a festive annual event
I think they should make a televised event of it complete with BBQ parties and the whole bit
I think they should build a gallows on the back of a flat bed truck and drive it down the street in slow procession then park it at the finish line where the bombings took place, string him up and get it done and over with
Might cause a few would be terrorists to think twice about messing with us in the future
But should we be as barbaric as those who seek to terrorize us? And these are the same kind of people that will strap on a bomb and blow themselves up if it would harm those they hate, trying to dissuade them with the risk of death isn't apt to deter too many of them. Also, even as his age, he will be more apt to die on death row of natural causes. Of all the people the feds have put on death row in the last 30 odd years, only three have actually been put to death, there is a long line ahead of him and with the shortage of the drugs needed for lethal injection, its a long shot on whether it will ever really happen.
My view is also that death is the easy way for people like that, its not that much of a punishment for them. They die a quick painless death if it ever takes place. I'm more of a fan of making them sit in their little cells all day and ponder what their life has become because they took so many innocent lives and made others suffer. So them actually suffering is a better punishment than giving them what they want.
Sorry, I guess I was channeling my inner Clint Eastwood and the old west 8)
Quote from: V M on May 16, 2015, 03:52:07 PM
Sorry, I guess I was channeling my inner Clint Eastwood and the old west 8)
I'm watching Gran Torino right now. Not a western, but a great Eastwood flick.
And no need to apologize for whatever you believe, I just gave my own look of it in return. :)
Quote from: Cindy on May 16, 2015, 03:23:30 AM
Seems extreme but...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fvignette2.wikia.nocookie.net%2Funderworld-empire%2Fimages%2F9%2F98%2FLieutenant_the_exterminator.png%2Frevision%2Flatest%3Fcb%3D20140702140046&hash=b58eeeba3bdbc7303a217f9cca6b13e02068a4ce)
I actually did say terminator to my mom originally, because I briefly forgot the terminology.
Quote from: marsh monster on May 16, 2015, 07:19:27 AM
The spiders know you hate them, so they push your boundaries. Learn to co-exist with them in harmony.
Only daddy long legs....the rest of them.......never!
The Hedgehog Can Never Be Buggered At All
probably should cut back on the caffeine and smarties for a bit.
Should I create a tumblr account ?
How do I live as a neutrois/agender ?
What should I eat for dinner ?
With who I'll go shopping ?
Have I close the door ?
Argh too many questions in my little brain !
Went weekend cycling today and yesterday, that's when all the business types come out with their $5000 Cervélo bikes ...
There is something deeply satisfying in showing up on an every day commuter bike wearing pink and purple and egging them on until they decide to fake a mechanical issue rather than being beaten by a girl :D
Money and memory woes.
Quote from: Laura_Squirrel on May 16, 2015, 02:24:37 PM
I can't wait for the new Faith No More CD to be released next week!! :icon_dance:
Yes, the new stuff is awesome. I saw them play last month. I especially liked "M*****f******".
I'm thinking that I'm going to get s***faced with my parents when they get here in a few minutes.
An interesting Keeping up with the Kardashians tonight. How the family is dealing with Bruce's coming out and going forward with living as a woman.
I am convinced that with a little bit of hard work and dedication, that I could jog 1/4 of a mile (one lap around a track that you have to go around 4 times to make a mile) without stopping while listening to military to cadences. I would just have to stay as close to the inside of the track as possible.
I got rid of a creepy guy in a priceless way.
Creep: "Hey lady, I have a bunch of designer handbags for sale in my trunk for cheap. Vuitton, Kors, Coach... Copies, of course."
Me: *holds up real Vuitton bag and rolls eyes*
Creep: *makes hasty exit*
thinking wow, i'm actually gender fluid and not queer gender. thats funny. no wonder why some days i feel female and other days i feel a male bout ready to rough someone up who looks at me wrong :o ;D
Currently thinking about how intense my love for pizza is :P
Quote from: Jill F on May 18, 2015, 08:02:02 PM
I got rid of a creepy guy in a priceless way.
Creep: "Hey lady, I have a bunch of designer handbags for sale in my trunk for cheap. Vuitton, Kors, Coach... Copies, of course."
Me: *holds up real Vuitton bag and rolls eyes*
Creep: *makes hasty exit*
hahaa amazing!
Quote from: marsh monster on May 17, 2015, 08:19:41 PM
An interesting Keeping up with the Kardashians tonight. How the family is dealing with Bruce's coming out and going forward with living as a woman.
For once, I'm actually keeping up with the Kardashians, lol. I don't really know why they are famous.
Quote from: King Malachite on May 18, 2015, 08:21:32 PM
For once, I'm actually keeping up with the Kardashians, lol. I don't really know why they are famous.
Robert Kardashian was one of OJ's lawyers in his trial and later died, also knew Jenner back then too, then Kris, Robert's widow, married Bruce who was already famous for being a decathlon athlete from the Olympics. So throw in some notoriety, a bit of showmanship, a few cups of reality television and a few tablespoons of greedy network that would sell anyone's mother down the river for a buck and waalaa, you have it!
oh and kevin bacon is probably involved somehow...
Quote from: Jill F on May 17, 2015, 08:04:47 PM
Yes, the new stuff is awesome. I saw them play last month. I especially liked "M*****f******".
I couldn't afford to go see them live. So, their Yahoo stream of the Detroit show was much appreciated. I bought the CD today. Totally awesome stuff!!
I think I'll make a pizza
My roommate said that I was a disorder...
lol
Right now i think F.... YOU
Quote from: V M on May 18, 2015, 08:56:00 PM
I think I'll make a pizza
I am a pizza.
I am a pizza.I am a pizza.
I am a pizza.lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala
I just had some pizza. now its oreo time!
Quote from: marsh monster on May 18, 2015, 08:36:46 PM
Robert Kardashian was one of OJ's lawyers in his trial and later died, also knew Jenner back then too, then Kris, Robert's widow, married Bruce who was already famous for being a decathlon athlete from the Olympics. So throw in some notoriety, a bit of showmanship, a few cups of reality television and a few tablespoons of greedy network that would sell anyone's mother down the river for a buck and waalaa, you have it!
oh and kevin bacon is probably involved somehow...
Ah, no wonder why people like to keep up with them!
The meatball topics are neck and neck! :laugh:
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 20, 2015, 02:32:23 PM
The meatball topics are neck and neck! :laugh:
So the meatballs are hanging together?
It's fun to plate a pair of meatballs with an Italian sausage sometimes. :P
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRj8n4a7kpU
Just kind of day dreaming of me being on a track with a bunch of obese people, and we are all dressed in camo uniforms, and the leader tells me that I have to lead them a lap around the track. Gosh, I be so nervous and not wanting that responsibility since I couldn't keep up myself, and if by some chance I did, then I'd surely be exhausted trying to make sure my comrades keep up and having to help them. It heart would be busting out of the ribcage, but hey if I had to be the leader for that moment, then that's what I got to do then. I'd try to be the "role model" for the other horizontally challenged comrades. I'd move at an extremely slow pace though, where walking would be faster, lol!
It's still weird for me when other guys show me nudes that their girlfriends or girls they've hooked up with. It's happened a few times, mostly it's just boobs or whatever which I can appreciate if they're decent. Today a friend was like "hey man check out this picture this girl sent me" and she was like...bent over ready for doggy style lol. I just started laughing at it because I couldn't figure out how in the world she managed to take a selfie at that angle. Or maybe someone took it for her which I think is even more hilarious.
Thinking "What is she going to do for an encore, quote Ray Blanchard?" :laugh:
Quote from: Anna++ on February 23, 2015, 08:03:54 PM
I'm a Linux kernel maintainer, so I've already moved into multi-threading land...
I'll have a cheddar ready next week :)
I was just reading and thought..I'm a pretty good popcorn kernel maintainer :)
Seriously tho, I do work with computers and want to learn more.
What now? Where has she gone?(me) Have I caged up Michelle again because I just can't handle her?
Tomorrow is Sweetie's and my 34th wedding anniversary. One year ago we were on a road trip to spend time with our son and his girlfriend in Pittsburgh, to see Cedar Point in Ohio, and to see the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I knew that shortly after we got back I would be coming out to her, which I did on June 2, much sooner than I thought. I wanted it to be the best trip ever, with no problems and no strife because I knew we might not make 34 years. The trip wasn't quite that good, but it was very, very good.
I look back on the last year and we've both tried very hard and, although there have been plenty of rocky spots, there has also been much joy. Tomorrow I hope we dedicate ourselves to another year of love, of trying to understand each other better and of treating each other better. Once again I sit wondering if there will be a 35th anniversary. We got past this year, but there are still more issues. It's becoming less and less possible for me to appear male. I'm still out of work, (although I have some prospects). Things are still putting stresses on our marriage and on us.
So, I'm thinking once again, that tomorrow could be our last anniversary, but, truthfully, that has been a possibility every anniversary for ours and every other marriage that has ever been.
If you love someone, whether you're married to them, living together or just seeing each other, evaluate the relationship honestly, end it if you have to, but give it every chance to thrive. Love is too precious and rare to take lightly or treat thoughtlessly.
Heavy thoughts for a Saturday morning.
Gonna think of beta games to play... Any thoughs anyone?
Quote from: saharo on May 23, 2015, 10:24:56 AM
Gonna think of beta games to play... Any thoughs anyone?
Depends. What kinds of games do you like?
I'm thinking about that poor little sandwich that suffers from a severe guilt complex because it was the sole survivor of a horrible bus crash.
I'm thinking that it's time to fire my accountants. The numbers on their bill literally did not add up. Seriously, the bottom line was magically inflated by $25. I hope we don't get audited now.
Also, the next person who tells me that they're "keeping it real" is getting an imprint of my rings on their forehead.
When you say you're "keeping it real", you imply that you aren't always honest, which makes you a pretty horrific person.
Quote from: Jill F on May 23, 2015, 07:58:21 PM
Also, the next person who tells me that they're "keeping it real" is getting an imprint of my rings on their forehead.
When you say you're "keeping it real", you imply that you aren't always honest, which makes you a pretty horrific person.
To me, if they say that, that's mean they are trying to justify being an ->-bleeped-<-.
Went to see Tomorrow Land today. It was good.
Also this am, I started out just planning to tighten the belt on the big old air compressor, but then I found that the silencer had fallen off, so had to find all the parts for that where it had fallen in the little air compressor shack, then find new nuts to hold the assembly together, then figure out how it all went back together, the thing is from the sixties(except the motor which I did replace back in the nineties), but its been a great compressor. Then I decided to change the oil in it while I was at it.
Then a little later I went to the pump house to put more salt and peroxide in the water system and noticed water spraying, found the air volume control had a rust spot in the housing, so had to go get a new one before I could take a shower to get ready to go to town. And the traffic was horrible coming back, beach towns get too crowded with ding batters and dit dots this time of year.
*Says "Keeping it real"* just to be evil and stir the pot >:-)
*Runs to hide*
For a girl who shouldn't really DRINK. I can sure do it when I try
Wondering where the fair gypsy has been lately.
Missed the Gypsy girl as well!
And why does the Kat have ten years of flea powder over him?
Where the Greek philosophers when we need them? Life is full of questions!
funny how answers tend to be so elusive.
Gypsy has been a busy little girl.
Helped a friend move in and making sure she is settled in down here. Glad she was with me last week, bad memories came back I was glad to have a someone close by to talk to. Even if I only gave little bits away
Been quite for a while time to make some noise me thinks
I can only imagine how hilarious it must be to watch someone such as myself who needs glasses wonder about trying to find where she set her glasses last :D
Quote from: immortal gypsy on May 24, 2015, 04:55:20 AM
Been quite for a while time to make some noise me thinks
No banging your pots and pans again Gypsy.
Quote from: Jenny07 on May 24, 2015, 05:49:55 AM
No banging your pots and pans again Gypsy.
Pots and pans. Well I am the chief cook and bottle washer in the little den the two of us have built over here. So... >:-)
never to eat a jumbo push pop out in public
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Quote from: Echo Alcestis on May 24, 2015, 08:07:35 AM
never to eat a jumbo push pop out in public
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Because or the mess, or...? ;)
Quote from: Dee Marshall on May 24, 2015, 08:18:32 AM
Because or the mess, or...? ;)
get your mind out the gutter xD
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Quote from: Echo Alcestis on May 24, 2015, 08:19:54 AM
get your mind out the gutter xD
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But, but, where will it live? It's never known any other home!
Quote from: Dee Marshall on May 24, 2015, 08:25:17 AM
But, but, where will it live? It's never known any other home!
hahaha! but seriously, don't eat jump push pops in public unless you wanna have a very bad day after dropping it in the dirt [emoji24]
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Quote from: Echo Alcestis on May 24, 2015, 08:31:04 AM
hahaha! but seriously, don't eat jump push pops in public unless you wanna have a very bad day after dropping it in the dirt [emoji24]
Sent from my VS985 4G using Tapatalk
Oh, yes, I remember that. Been a long, long time since I've eaten one of those anywhere, let alone outside.
Saw a news story this morning about a black family on Long Island, NY that received an anonymous piece of hate mail and I was appalled. Then I though of the good side. It was news! It wasn't that long ago that it wouldn't have been.
Wow, I missed a lot around here in a week.
Quote from: Mariah2014 on May 24, 2015, 09:33:10 AM
Wow, I missed a lot around here in a week.
Welcome back. Glad you are OK.
Thinking about canceling my top surgery....
Quote from: King Malachite on May 24, 2015, 09:40:37 AM
Thinking about canceling my top surgery....
Why?
It is very common to have pre-op doubts. Just try to concentrate on the positives. But if you keep having doubts just postpone for awhile.
Big Hugs. I hope everything is okay.
Mariah
Quote from: King Malachite on May 24, 2015, 09:40:37 AM
Thinking about canceling my top surgery....
Whatever you decide, Malachite, we've got your back! (But can I have your front?) Do what's best for you.
Thanks ladies. I'm just going through one of those down/questioning times at the moment. Dee, you could so have my front, lol.
Quote from: King Malachite on May 24, 2015, 05:52:20 PM
Thanks ladies. I'm just going through one of those down/questioning times at the moment. Dee, you could so have my front, lol.
I'm glad that made you laugh! Shortly after I posted it I began to wonder if the humor would upset you.
I need sex. Now.
Not a random thought. Lately all the time.
Sure it has to do with not having E in my body anymore.
I've decided to sign up for online dating. What've I got to lose...
I'm thinking about dinner.
And knowing I'll prolly wind up just making a sandwich
imma be forced to watch the documentary on ABC family .-. I hope I'm at work when it comes on
Feeling kinda hungry, think I'll make a sandwich 8)
Thinking of finally coming out to my best of friends. Well, she's more of a sister from another city to be quite honest. But I don't know quiet how to do it, I'm thinking of writing my thoughts out, but in person might be a bit more easy for her to handle, and maybe she can ask questions...I could go on for hours. Also breakfast does sound good, maybe enchilada brunch.
haha, funny bus ride this morning. was sitting right next to a trans women or if not, a drag. no gripe bit its funny because I've never seen one out in public. I know a few because they told me. how small this world is. we should all wear bracelets to identify each other [emoji23]
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Rolled my bad (well worse they're both terrible when the want to be,) ankle going down some stairs. Somebody is going to have a 'fun' day tomorrow. Oh joy
Paragraphs are your friend!
Parasites are not.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on May 27, 2015, 03:50:37 PM
Parasites are not.
You're ticking me off! :laugh:
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 27, 2015, 03:55:01 PM
You're ticking me off! [emoji23]
Hugs, Devlyn
Sorry, didn't mean to bug you.
I feel like I've been fleased...
I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.
Quote from: Laura_Squirrel on May 27, 2015, 06:40:36 PM
I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt.
And you know what we say when something strange happens.
"It's
good Laura Squirrel did that, it's
very good!
Contrary to one driver's belief, my co-driver and I are not in a relationship together. Nor am I interested in hooking up with said driver. And yes, I can shift all 13 gears in my truck without touching the clutch, I am that skilled. And I did indeed teach my codriver how to float the gears and drive a 13 speed.
This was certainly an interesting day with plenty of sexism, unwanted advances and amazement that a woman can drive a semi truck and not look butch doing it.
Quote from: Rainbow Dash on May 28, 2015, 12:08:46 AM
Contrary to one driver's belief, my co-driver and I are not in a relationship together. Nor am I interested in hooking up with said driver. And yes, I can shift all 13 gears in my truck without touching the clutch, I am that skilled. And I did indeed teach my codriver how to float the gears and drive a 13 speed.
This was certainly an interesting day with plenty of sexism, unwanted advances and amazement that a woman can drive a semi truck and not look butch doing it.
Wow! Respect, I never got the hang of doing that :icon_bunch:
Quote from: Lady Smith on May 28, 2015, 12:22:04 AM
Wow! Respect, I never got the hang of doing that :icon_bunch:
it's actually quite easy. There is a "sweet spot" which, when the RPM'S are sufficient, it will let you pull the shifter out of gear and through neutral into the next gear. But the key is to have pressure on the shifter before you change gears. Also, make sure your jake brake isn't retarding your RPM'S when you take your foot off the accelerator pedal as you shift.
I envy Leonard and Penny's relationship on the Big Bang Theory. Why couldn't Adam (Birkin) be the Leonard to my Penny?
They remained friends even after they broke up. *sigh*
I was hot so I took of my sweater jacket than instantly froze now after taking my sweater jacket off again, I'm freezing. I mean like what the hell is up with my temperature control. also I woke up feeling weaker than I did yesterday. maybe I'm starting to lose muscle or maybe its just my imagination
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Patchouli oil is NOT a substitute for bathing. Eww!
tonight is the first time since last September that I've had to set my alarm for in the morning. It'll be interesting going back after so long. Them calling me today was a shock.
Quote from: Jill F on May 28, 2015, 07:30:17 PM
Patchouli oil is NOT a substitute for bathing. Eww!
Neither is running through the sprinklers in a graveyard, but some people do it - Never got into the patchouli oil thing
I am thinking that I was blessed with one of the best sisters in the world. We had a great 5 hour conversation today and that was the longest time we had ever talked!!!
When I want to Jillax at a bar, I don't want screaming kids climbing on it. What the hell is wrong with people? I don't drink at playgrounds and kids don't belong in bars.
Pish tosh! I was always very well behaved at the bar as a child. I sat at a table and calmly drank my drink. Why, if not for that I would have had no father/son time at all!
Sadly, I did NOT make that up.
I was going to work around the house, but got an offer to jump on a boat and go to an island instead. See ya!
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: immortal gypsy on May 27, 2015, 09:55:10 PM
And you know what we say when something strange happens.
"It's good Laura Squirrel did that, it's very good!
think, you. no! don't even think. she senses it. just grab the bat and...
(Laura points at me, i turn into a Jack-In-The-Box)
aaahhh!
Season 3 Treehouse Of Horror II
A parody of "It's A Good Life" from "The Twilight Zone"
My ADHD meds have worn off ... I cannot possibly type everything I am thinking ::) I think I may need a nap
Got called just about every name in the book today. Babe, sweetheart, darling, hon, dear, one dude was calling me baby girl or something. I'm not real big on terms of endearment...
It must be 5 o'clock somewhere. >:-). Tequila, beer or bubbly? Screw it. I want the trifecta.
A bottle of rosé a client brought to Sweetie from Greece, a bag of pitas and we're making tzatziki. Perfect for 80°F!
If DJs have coffins, can I bury the one downstairs in his? Seriously, that one needs to go.
I'm thinking..YES!! those bright pink tights I bought 3 months ago fit me now! and...we didn't get rained on today!!
I sometimes wonder if I should make a blog in English about my transition even if I'm pretty much ready and done with it already.
Just can't see anyone being interested how Finland does things. *shrug*
Quote from: Zóôt Threepwood on May 30, 2015, 01:56:23 PM
think, you. no! don't even think. she senses it. just grab the bat and...
(Laura points at me, i turn into a Jack-In-The-Box)
aaahhh!
Season 3 Treehouse Of Horror II
A parody of "It's A Good Life" from "The Twilight Zone"
Yep! Back when The Simpsons was still worth watching.
I wonder what happened to dragonbeer.
I know the grass is always greener on the other side. BUT , I think I enjoyed the time I spent over the weekend with my special friends family then my own.
I'm thinking that if I complain about Adelaide being 3c and I'm freezing I will get little sympathy.
Hugs Cindy. I hope that warms it up some in Adelaide. I would gladly take the cold over the heat right now. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: Cindy on June 02, 2015, 07:52:12 AM
I'm thinking that if I complain about Adelaide being 3c and I'm freezing I will get little sympathy.
A jumper, two football jerseys and I'm still cold.
Gypsy is in a similar boat to you Cindy, not much sympathy coming this way. Sorry
51°F(10°C) here and raining. Much too chilly for the 2nd of June. Not good for my mood at all! If I hadn't had a good interview yesterday I would be severely depressed.
I'm thinking that the changes due to global warming or whatever you want to call it are really starting to bite. There are migratory birds around where I live, -Godwits, - who haven't left yet and they should have gone a month or two ago.
Quote from: Cindy on June 02, 2015, 07:52:12 AM
I'm thinking that if I complain about Adelaide being 3c and I'm freezing I will get little sympathy.
Sadly, I still don't have any spare heat to share.
Quote from: LordKAT on June 03, 2015, 03:57:15 AM
Quote from: Cindy on June 02, 2015, 07:52:12 AM
I'm thinking that if I complain about Adelaide being 3c and I'm freezing I will get little sympathy.
Sadly, I still don't have any spare heat to share.
You never sent the snow when I was boiling!!
I'll send you warm Hugs though!
I tried sending the snow! It melted en route.
Weird to be back at work and at the same store I started in, but nice overall. People are saying they are really glad to see me back though.
Thinking I just rused Mariah in the last person thread! :laugh:
Maybe, and then maybe not. Either way lots of Fun Devlyn. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on June 03, 2015, 09:56:58 PM
Thinking I just rused Mariah in the last person thread! :laugh:
It is fun.....when I'm winning! :-*
lol
I finally found the spider that got away from me and made me sleep in the living room for about two weeks. He was dead in my jacket. I am so happy! Thank you, poison!
My boss is changing my hours for the summer. Oh joy... -_- Well, I need the money to finish paying the rest of my top surgery off, if I choose to go through with it. Still on the fence. I need to make a decision quick. I wish I was working in the day time Mondays-Fridays so I can take the bus home and not have to stay until 9. I was working Tuesday- Thursday from 4 until 9, but I got my co-worker to agree to work Thursday nights and I work the day shift. Yay!
My mom is sloppy drunk tonight. You would think one dui collision would grab her attention, but apparently not. The liquor bottle in her purse while I was driving proved that to me She has to want to get help.
There is a fast food worker at a joint, and she is a really sweet girl. I enjoy talking to her, and I feel like she enjoys talking to me. I wouldn't mind taking her out on a date. I would like to get to know her better. It sucks that every time I speak to her, there's always a customer that comes and ruins it.
My mom turned the furnace on, and it is dusty. I can smell it, and that is not good.
I didn't survive the Blight. ;w;
#gamerfeels
I could stand out on the street corner and sell personalities for 50 cents each, at least then everyone could have one ::)
Personalities abound, unfortunately, some are not so good.
Breathing is difficult, who knew it could be so much work.
Quote from: LordKAT on June 06, 2015, 02:11:54 AM
Breathing is difficult, who knew it could be so much work.
Difficulty breathing? Whats going on?
A combination of things, partly due to lack of meds, partly due to pollen, and a very hard time quitting cigarettes. Binding probably isn't helping much.
Gentle Hug my friend
Thanks
So we have crazy property prices in Sydney that just keep going up.
Every weekend new records are set and all over the news.
Last time I looked my place was worth, well a lot more than I paid 6.5 years ago.
Now I look again today at similar places sold in my suburb. 7 figure OMG!!!! :o
This is just insane. I work darn hard and most goes to my mortgage. :(
How is anyone able to buy in?
Property bubble? Even Captain obvious can see that it is and he's blind.
I feel guilty living by myself and having a spare room.
Not for long though.
My sister has to get surgery done because her uterus is sticking to her stomach. I asked her when and she said either in August or September.......really? Right around the time when I'm supposed to have surgery.... If I follow through, then this will be interesting, and not in a good way. Watch, her surgery date will probably land on my date....
It was sort of sad to finally harvest our pineapple, but it is tasty and we made estate pina coladas out of it. Cheers!
I'm wondering if things would be better if I took a handful of xanax
No - I'm not suicidal, just having one of those days whee I'm so out of sync and the noise in my brain is drivingme crazy.
I'm getting restless, and my kitchen keeps calling me to play. This can only lead to trouble.
One time I ended up making a carrot cake and giving it very bright green icing
Dear opponents of same-sex marriage,
My wife of 21 years and I would like to thank you for empowering us to destroy the sanctity of your second, third and fourth marriages, as well as the "moral fabric of society".
You're welcome.
And BTW, what exactly is this "moral fabric" of which you speak, and where can we find dresses made from it?
Quote from: Jill F on June 08, 2015, 07:46:02 PM
Dear opponents of same-sex marriage,
My wife of 21 years and I would like to thank you for empowering us to destroy the sanctity of your second, third and fourth marriages, as well as the "moral fabric of society".
You're welcome.
And BTW, what exactly is this "moral fabric" of which you speak, and where can we find dresses made from it?
I bet Monica would have loved to have had a dress made of it, I hear its semen stain resistant...
I don't know. But I buy all my immoral fibres at Tramps-R-Us! >:-)
I'm so happy that only my clownfish liquid paperweight broke!
I need some orange juice.
I've seen so much infighting and hostility within our community over the last month that I'm tempted to say goodbye, it's sad for me because I love you, I love the creative, smart, courageous people that I meet and befriend but sadly it only takes a few rotten apples to spoil it for everyone.
Why are we our own worst enemies?
I found out about this Titanic liquid paperweight that has a ship and a glacier floating in it. The liquid paperweight collector in me wants to get this, but I feel like this is disrespectful to those who died on that ship and suffered greatly. Had the left the word "Titanic" out, I would feel more comfortable buying it because I wouldn't have made the connection. All I would have seen was a boat and a glacier. I've been wanting a floatable boat in a liquid paperweight/wave in a bottle for a while. I don't know. I'd just feel terribly crappy for buying it. If I did, then I'd have to just ignore the "Titanic" part and just see it as a boat and a glacier.
Meanwhile, I have to buy another clownish liquid paperweight and want to get a penguin one.
Quote from: immortal gypsy on June 08, 2015, 03:46:16 PM
I'm getting restless, and my kitchen keeps calling me to play. This can only lead to trouble.
One time I ended up making a carrot cake and giving it very bright green icing
Some reason, this sounds tasty.
It was very tasty. Yet some people (adults mostly) couldn't get past the icing to try it.
Quote from: immortal gypsy on June 09, 2015, 01:11:28 AM
It was very tasty. Yet some people (adults mostly) couldn't get past the icing to try it.
Anyone that would turn down a carrot cake due to the icing is a poser.
I'll agree with that. somehow green icing on carrot cake actually seems very apt.
Quote from: Laura_Squirrel on June 09, 2015, 01:41:27 AM
Anyone that would turn down a carrot cake due to the icing is a poser.
I only pretend to be a poser.
Quote from: antonia on June 08, 2015, 09:06:08 PM
I've seen so much infighting and hostility within our community over the last month that I'm tempted to say goodbye, it's sad for me because I love you, I love the creative, smart, courageous people that I meet and befriend but sadly it only takes a few rotten apples to spoil it for everyone.
Why are we our own worst enemies?
Am thinking I haven't been seeing the same threads as you have. But I guess every group has a few rotten apples at times.
I didn't buy a milkshake today while at work, which allows me to purchase a book from my childhood. I made .87 cents Sunday, and found .04 cents, so I have .91 cents to go towards this book that I will pay to pay $4.00 for, so I'm paying $3.09 for it. Cool.
It's going down to 3C tonight. I'm thinking there is going to be a cold little chick in Adelaide.
Quote from: Cindy on June 10, 2015, 02:27:37 AM
It's going down to 3C tonight. I'm thinking there is going to be a cold little chick in Adelaide.
Sending you warm thoughts your way.
Cold here too. I'm so not looking forward to going home tonight. Wonder if I can sleep at work
Quote from: immortal gypsy on June 10, 2015, 03:17:21 AM
Quote from: Cindy on June 10, 2015, 02:27:37 AM
It's going down to 3C tonight. I'm thinking there is going to be a cold little chick in Adelaide.
Sending you warm thoughts your way.
Cold here too. I'm so not looking forward to going home tonight. Wonder if I can sleep at work
Stay safe and shiver!
Quote from: Cindy on June 10, 2015, 03:20:03 AM
Sending you warm thoughts your way.
Cold here too. I'm so not looking forward to going home tonight. Wonder if I can sleep at work
Stay safe and shiver!
I always....try. Will have a friend meet me when I finish, why should I shiver alone
Quote from: Cindy on June 10, 2015, 02:27:37 AM
It's going down to 3C tonight. I'm thinking there is going to be a cold little chick in Adelaide.
OMG they are so soft in SA...
It was -7 at home this morning, coldest place in the country.
3C, balmy by comparison.
June is the cold month for us too where I live in the Waikato. Hard frosts that turn all the roofs of the houses in our street white and heavy river mists that make the cold seep into your bones. Black ice is a problem on the roads around here too, especially along the river gorge road. There's always some idiot who doesn't drive for the conditions along there despite the warning signs and we have sirens going off in town and the local volunteer fire brigade chaps and the paramedics being called out to sort out somebody who has spun off the road.
*Possible Trigger WARNING*
So many uninformed people: https://www.yahoo.com/health/woman-barred-from-planet-fitness-gym-after-113265872887.html (https://www.yahoo.com/health/woman-barred-from-planet-fitness-gym-after-113265872887.html).
Look at the comments. I can't educate them all at once or alone....Sigh. :(
I can't quit listening to the new Faith No More CD.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgSsb6067x4
Watching this: McKinny Texas seems like a horrible place to live, and I'm not even just referring to the pool party incident.
Quote from: Jenny07 on June 10, 2015, 03:42:27 AM
Quote from: Cindy on June 10, 2015, 02:27:37 AM
It's going down to 3C tonight. I'm thinking there is going to be a cold little chick in Adelaide.
OMG they are so soft in SA...
It was -7 at home this morning, coldest place in the country.
3C, balmy by comparison.
Hope you froze your ass off! I did :laugh:
Been thinking on the state of my insanity.
When I was young, there were commercials saying that a mind is a terrible thing to waste.
As a teen rebel, I knew everything and shared my mind with anyone and everyone, after all, why waste it?. Having splintered the best pieces of my mind, those who received my wisdom deemed it worth their time to to share pieces of their mind with me, sometimes returning small shards of my wisdom.
As a few years passed, I had kids and realized that my mind was in so many pieces that I knew next to nothing.
Finally, true wisdom around age thirty, All the kings horses and all the kings men, can't put my mind back together again.
Oh, the insanity of it all.
Why is it that one can be overwhelmed or underwhelmed, but not simply "whelmed"?
Or "gruntled"?
What up with that?
Modern English just might be the dumbest language ever.
If I were on death row, I'd prefer the firing squad. Bring that back!
I don't have much so I do my best to make do and find creative ways to try to enjoy what little I do have, but for some reason there always seems to be someone who thinks they need to take a crap on it - What the hell?!?!?! :P
I apologize for ever even attempting and/or admitting to ever enjoying or being happy about anything!!! :P
Quote from: Jill F on June 11, 2015, 01:43:03 PM
Why is it that one can be overwhelmed or underwhelmed, but not simply "whelmed"?
Or "gruntled"?
What up with that?
Modern English just might be the dumbest language ever.
Probably why you considered fluent in a foreign language after 4 years but are required to study English for 12.
I think we should have a thread on english, american australian english so we have a common language.
Fair Dinkum
Quote from: Jill F on June 11, 2015, 01:43:03 PM
Why is it that one can be overwhelmed or underwhelmed, but not simply "whelmed"?
Or "gruntled"?
What up with that?
Modern English just might be the dumbest language ever.
I think you can in Europe :P
Never send a drone to do the job of a human
i think i know why Coldplay are called Coldplay.
No matter which one of their songs is PLAYing, it never fails to leave me COLD.
"rimshot"
I'm still amazed so many people are so glad to see me back at the store even when I haven't been there for almost a year. Weird...
Not looking forward to working my co-worker's shifts. At least I will be getting extra money. I plan on taking off one Saturday in August for a local comic con in our area, so he will have to fill in for me then, but it is only one day after the summer. Meh, I really do hate my job, but hey, it is better than nothing.
E3 was a major let down for the Sony Press conference. For a brand that claims there is more in store for the PS3, they sure didn't act like it.
I met my therapist today at their main office instead of the rented satellite office. That meant they had their own front door and a unisex bathroom. For the first, I got to change ahead of my appointment AND wear makeup. Very happy.
I still feel weird. It feels right, but I'm not very good with makeup, I still have all my body hair, and my wig is cheapest. I don't feel fat, but I catch myself in the mirror and am reminded what a lumbering ox I am.
I think I spooked my therapist's patient when I arrived. When, I left, there were 2 people in the waiting room, so I kind of kept my head down and headed for the bathroom. When I got in, I looked up into the mirror and saw the woman looking up in my direction, smiling. I smiled back before I closed the door. When I came out in guy mode, she was still there and she once again smiled at me. I know I'm not really ready, mentally or physically, to be outside as Charlotte, but that did feel good.
Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk
Yay supergirl came and visited me this morning at watch Game 6 of the Stanley Cup finals. It made the morning part of my shift a little easier to handle. Now if only I had learned to listen to her about hockey by now, at least she's not gloating........YET!!!!!!
Calmed down after seeing the dentist yesterday.
Wow was I a mess after..... :eusa_sick:
Time off work and it's cold grey and raining. Priceless.
I love it when it rains.
I want to see a midget roll on the grass.
I want to go to the end of that rainbow and punt a f****** leprechaun.
Sometimes the questions are answers.
But sometimes the answer leads to more questions...
My next 17 days are going to be......sucky. work related.
Rain rain and more rain.
Starting to get foot rot.
So much for enjoying the sun on my time off. :(
I better get done getting ready and go get my blood drawn.
Mariah
I wish some people would learn to spell and construct sentences that actually made sense
Quote from: V M on June 19, 2015, 08:13:33 AM
I wish some people would learn to spell and construct sentences that actually made sense
Wot u meen me kant spel good.
Another border crossing on my old passport today and then back on Sunday, hopefully they will just waive me through knowing that there is no such thing as a trans terrorist (except perhaps in the fashion sense)
Dropping a full can of anything on your big toe while wearing sandals is never a good thing :o
Right there with ya V M. I'm sitting here right now cringing. A adjustable wrench just fell off the table onto my socked foot. Hit on the middle toes tho :o
You know you have let your paperwork at work fall WAY behind. When you have to start signing things in your old name again
I have a strong desire to buy a military-style beret and have a custom patch made to be worn on it that reflects the thing that I have gone through/will have to endure as a trans person.
A full moon must be near by.
Mariah
Narcolepsy might sound like fun, but it's not. I have a far more active life in the dreamscape than I do in real life which is starting to feel like whenever I'm awake I'm visiting a foreign country until I fall asleep again.
Quote from: Lady Smith on June 22, 2015, 03:47:11 AM
Narcolepsy might sound like fun, but it's not. I have a far more active life in the dreamscape than I do in real life which is starting to feel like whenever I'm awake I'm visiting a foreign country until I fall asleep again.
I had some research projects on narcolepsy, and no it isn't fun at all.
Sorry you suffer from it. Stay strong, I sort of know what you go through.
Love Hon
Quote from: Cindy on June 22, 2015, 03:51:53 AM
I had some research projects on narcolepsy, and no it isn't fun at all.
Sorry you suffer from it. Stay strong, I sort of know what you go through.
Love Hon
Thanks Cindy :) Most of the time it doesn't get me down, but the Winter weather here has been really cold and wet which isn't helping.
Quote from: Lady Smith on June 22, 2015, 03:55:33 AM
Quote from: Cindy on June 22, 2015, 03:51:53 AM
I had some research projects on narcolepsy, and no it isn't fun at all.
Sorry you suffer from it. Stay strong, I sort of know what you go through.
Love Hon
Thanks Cindy :) Most of the time it doesn't get me down, but the Winter weather here has been really cold and wet which isn't helping.
The team I was in found the autoantibody that causes it, at least in many sufferers. The idiotype is now in production. One day we will have a treatment. It is a horrible disease.
I've been off HRT for... well.. I've lost track. I need to take time off to see my Endo so I can get my prescription renewed. Frankly, I look like crap. I just don't look after myself much anymore. I just eat, sleep and drive. I should be more proactive. But going home to take care of this physical is more hassle than anything. Why? Because i am just a paycheck to my family. Because I can never even get home to relax. I always come home to some stupid drama or I have to fix something that got broke.
I like my trucker life. I don't make any new friends and only have to deal with strangers I will never see again.
There must be someone out there that knows how to lay down a groove while I play my happy ass tunes, well some of them maybe not so happy but they all gotta groove in some way anyway
E minor, 104 bpm, 4/4.
Winning an argument with a smart person is much easier than winning one with an idiot.
That is probably because it ends up being more debate than argument.
I'm thinking I'm in love with a crazy man.
I'm an idiot.
Quote from: Cindy on June 23, 2015, 05:09:34 AM
I'm thinking I'm in love with a crazy man.
I'm an idiot.
non sequeter (sp)?
If I got a higher score on an IQ test than Einstein and Hawking ever did, then it's probably just a bogus test.
Either that or I should have just got the damned PhD in physics like my dad and sister did.
A mind is a terrible thing.
Never find peace.
In light of the Charleston shooting, and the type of "treatment" that kid has gotten from the police and judge (before he was taken off the case) it makes me ashamed to be a South Carolinian.
Then again, that shame happened long before then, when the governor decided to take that little trip to Argentina to meet his mistress.....and then shortly after that one politician who shouted "you lie!" to Obama during a conference.
As far as these major stores banning Confederate paraphernalia, I say let them continue selling that stuff. If a person wants to drape their body and identity in that, then I'd like to know who they are, so I can stay away from them, if need be. Of course not every person who enjoys Confederate paraphernalia is a horrible person, but I say keep selling that stuff in the store. As far as the Confederate flag is concerned, for the most part, I could care less if it is taken down or not. It's not going to stop racism, especially subtle racism.
I think I need to barf. Unfortunately, I mean that quite literally.
About my new truck I pick up tomorrow,a 2015 Chevy 2500 HD 4x4 with the Duramax diesel.Checked it out on the lot on Monday,liked it on the test drive.Not cheap and I got a good deal on it.
Quote from: Jill F on June 23, 2015, 02:08:31 AM
E minor, 104 bpm, 4/4.
Chop those bpm's in half and you have a winner.
Quote from: Jill F on June 24, 2015, 02:46:19 PM
I think I need to barf. Unfortunately, I mean that quite literally.
Jill never barfs at home???
I can tell my mother has been drinking. The other day, I asked her not to turn my air conditioner on when I'm not here because it drips. She eventually said okay. Tonight, I come home from work, and the air conditioner is on. Later on she says "Aren't you glad I turned your air conditioner on?" twice. I spit out my food, smiled and said yes. I guess I am glad that she thought about me, but no, I'd rather not have the side of my bed wet....
Quote from: King Malachite on June 24, 2015, 08:46:50 PM
I can tell my mother has been drinking. The other day, I asked her not to turn my air conditioner on when I'm not here because it drips. She eventually said okay. Tonight, I come home from work, and the air conditioner is on. Later on she says "Aren't you glad I turned your air conditioner on?" twice. I spit out my food, smiled and said yes. I guess I am glad that she thought about me, but no, I'd rather not have the side of my bed wet....
If its a window unit, make sure its tilted a little towards the back and look for the drain, it might be clogged. It shouldn't drip inside.
Quote from: marsh monster on June 25, 2015, 07:16:03 AM
If its a window unit, make sure its tilted a little towards the back and look for the drain, it might be clogged. It shouldn't drip inside.
Last year, we had to use a giant stick to tilt it back, but I just can't be bothered to deal with that again. It's just easier to take the fan out of the bathroom and use that, lol.
I really hope I'm not about to catch a summer cold, I've been sneezing the last few days on and off, and I don't get hayfever or anything. I feel tired but that might be partly because I woke up at 7AM for a blood test... Taking it easy today.
I'm really tired of seeing all the resurgence of "confederate pride" on facebook over this stupid flag issue. Its such a shame that people want to glorify a symbol of a tragic chapter in our history that took too many lives. I don't think any of them even realize that it was a battle flag and not even used by all the different divisions of the south at the time. Nor that the flag wasn't even really much of a symbol after the civil war until the fight for desegregation began in the South, then the flag got brought out and guess what, it was used by those who didn't want those black people going to the same schools as their white kids. I'm ashamed of living any where near the south currently, but thank goodness I wasn't born here....
Marines and Navy has some of the best running cadences. For me, I say the Marines come in at number one, though.
Seems like about a third of my fb news feed is about equality, a third is a bunch of religious stuff and the rest is a mix of puppies, the minions, shark attacks and family stuff.
My co-worker is moving to Virginia and had a yard sale yesterday. She told me her Sailor Moon stuff almost sold, but didn't. She offered them to me (her drawing and over 100 Sailor Moon cards) both for $2 total. She really just needs to get rid of things so her move will be easier, so I'm going to take that stuff off her hands! Then I found a dollar today, so it's like I'm only paying $1! Awesome! I'm getting them Sunday. My mom said it's more junk, and it is really, but at least I will always have something to remember her by....that is until I sell that stuff a flip it for a profit, lol, but that won't be anytime soon.
No really....I do have a lot of items. I need to start selling again on Facebook yardsale groups!
I'm thinking with all the news swirling around that the ban on openly transgender service members might soon be lifted, I'm also thinking this month is almost over and I might be stuck waiting another year since nobody will likely care about it after this month. I'm thinking i'm going to need some serious vocal surgery and therapy for my voice or I'll never pass and I'm scared Estrogen won't do anything for me. I'm a nervous wreck about things I cannot control.
A vacation from the hot temperatures were having right now would be nice.
I enjoy being a girl!
(Trite, I know. So what.)
I think the best advice I can give is give it a try, go full time, work on your voice and train it, take your hormones and see where you get, personally I've been amazed and now I'm at the point where I don't think I'll do any work except SRS/GRS whilst I thought I'd need the full works.
Hugs
- Antonia
Quote from: Riven on June 27, 2015, 12:46:13 AM
I'm thinking with all the news swirling around that the ban on openly transgender service members might soon be lifted, I'm also thinking this month is almost over and I might be stuck waiting another year since nobody will likely care about it after this month. I'm thinking i'm going to need some serious vocal surgery and therapy for my voice or I'll never pass and I'm scared Estrogen won't do anything for me. I'm a nervous wreck about things I cannot control.
The hot temperatures sure brings out the worst in people.
The best "Run to Cadence" CD covers in my opinion are the Army Airborne: Volume 2 and Marines: Volume 3, in my opinion.
So, today's shark attack in Dare county, the second in as many days, is the sixth shark attack on the NC coast this month. I'm thinking about going swimming on the core banks on the fourth now. Maybe that I'm high in trans fat will keep them from biting me...
Quote from: antonia on June 27, 2015, 08:35:45 AM
I think the best advice I can give is give it a try, go full time, work on your voice and train it, take your hormones and see where you get, personally I've been amazed and now I'm at the point where I don't think I'll do any work except SRS/GRS whilst I thought I'd need the full works.
Hugs
- Antonia
I appreciate the advice, but none of these things are really anything I can do while serving. Im starting to think hardly anybody is even really aware that the biggest employer of transgendered people is also its largest discriminator.
Edit: I didn't like the way I responded so I fixed it.
Saw this topic:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,191126.0.html
Instead of polluting it, will dump my trash here. I am so looking forward to get T free and get help keeping the package quiet. If it shrinks, that will make tucking easier. All in all, I see how hrt eases the dysphoria, together with its other benefits.
Yeah your situation is not good, hopefully the US Armed Services will become more tolerant soon, I know quite a few of the trans people that serve here in Canada have done down and discussed how incorporating trans people into the Armed Services here has been trouble free, I think it's mostly a matter of time now.
Quote from: Riven on June 27, 2015, 07:32:37 PM
I appreciate the advice, but none of these things are really anything I can do while serving. Im starting to think hardly anybody is even really aware that the biggest employer of transgendered people is also its largest discriminator.
Edit: I didn't like the way I responded so I fixed it.
I always love getting followed around by employees in stores..... -_- *sarcasm*
I'm thinking I'm not worth spending a ->-bleeped-<-load of money on for top surgery but I gotta do it. I'll probably go private for the sake of work but I'm too gutless to say that maybe they should pay part since I'm spending for their benefit.
I love refried beans with loads of pork fat. *drool*
No shark attacks today...
Quote from: Jill F on June 29, 2015, 07:28:11 PM
I love refried beans with loads of pork fat. *drool*
Sounds good! I like them with jack or cheddar cheese. Tonight we had shrimp for dinner. Some are left, so cheese grits with shrimp for lunch tomorrow!
I sometimes feel like I don't deserve to transition because I haven't suffered enough.
I haven't gone out in public dressed much and it's only been in safe places. I want to, but I have something/someone holding me back. I'm scared of not passing and getting called out on it. I so want to.
Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk
PIAZZA!! PIZZA!!!
There ought to be a law regarding garnishing a persons pay to the point that they can't buy food or pay rent.
Quote from: LordKAT on June 30, 2015, 04:28:30 AM
There ought to be a law regarding garnishing a persons pay to the point that they can't buy food or pay rent.
Speak to a lawyer, Kat. In most states there is.
No shark attacks again today. But someone did drown when they fell off a watercraft.
And the Republican Clown Car is about full. Many more and they'll be putting them in the trunk.
Quote from: marsh monster on June 30, 2015, 06:39:32 PM
And the Republican Clown Car is about full. Many more and they'll be putting them in the trunk.
Of the elephant, car or did you mean a certain body part?
And why does Scalia's use of the term "jiggery-pokery" sound like a euphemism for anal sex? I think Scalia and Thomas would make a perfect couple, BTW. Methinks they doth protest far too much.
I was going to protest about something but then I got too busy with helping other folks and forgot what it was
Quote from: Dee Marshall on June 30, 2015, 05:26:28 AM
Speak to a lawyer, Kat. In most states there is.
Apparently they don't even have to tell you they are doing it. You get to find out when suddenly there is a shortage of funds in your bank account.
I'm so relieved. For a bit there today I thought my endo might have just cut me off. Usually he puts refills on my prescription, but the pharmacy told me that he didn't do it again. Hormonally speaking, I'm a postie and need it every day without fail. Fortunately, my compounder called him and went to bat for me, reminding him of my situation (yes, my endo is a bit scatterbrained) and got approved for 4 more months without having to see him. I actually need a new endo or ob/gyn soon that will actually take my insurance. I'm sick of paying out of pocket.
Anyone know of a trans friendly doc in the Los Angeles area that takes Aetna?
Another shark attack today, makes number seven for my state in the last month. So we are tied with the highest count for one year now, anymore more will set a new benchmark if the shark data center is correct.
an interesting notion i have. though hate spreads, i kind of like the world as it is, because i am among the top strong willed warriors so it shows that i'm not as weak and my bite is most definitely lethal. i have been promoted to angel of destruction, so i can just send them straight to oblivion so that would work to :laugh:
Why is it so difficult for customer service reps at a particular 'Big Box' store to answer a simple question? ::)
Blu-tack is great for catching fleas.
EWWWWW!!!
There's an insect in the house!!!
YOU DIE NOW!!
I bailed on my kick scooter last night going down the hill. I'm in so much pain now.
Am I going to watch buzzfeed and risk appearing extremely tired to my friends tomorrow because I went on for far too long.
I fear I may lose my internet for a short time.
I really wish I could wear a nice dress at work instead these ugly orange overalls
I am wondering if anyone else is watching closely progress of the New Horizons probe to Pluto.
So?
so the eighth shark attack along the NC coast in less than a month. Wonder if the sharks are just trying to drum up ratings for shark week.
It's a wonderful world we live in where an army of sharks has brain implants but no "freaking laser beams", turns out it's way way better to have them attack swimmers for the Discovery channel before shark week .....⸮
Ohh and I've recently been told I should include the unrecognised international sarcasm punctuation symbol just in case someone is too literal⸮
My face totally changed since I've started taking aspirin 100mg/day! :icon_joy: Obviously I had problems with circulation after nose surgery and pregnancy...feeling so much better now..
When I was young I would play various sports, racket ball turned out to be one of my favorite games 8) It was a competitive, fast action game and even if you were playing doubles everyone one got to play
Where as in other games there often tended to be a "Ball Hog" that would constantly hog the ball, make several dumb mistakes and then they would complain that "they had to do it all"
Some people would try to reason with them, some would make jokes like "There is no I in team" or "Yeah, but the rest of us only showed up because it's so entertaining to watch you run around and make an ass of yourself showing off" or "Have you ever thought about passing the ball once in awhile?
After awhile, other folks would lose interest and wouldn't wan't to play with them and then they'ed complain about that as well
So if you don't want to end up playing with yourself, don't be a ball hog
Hugs
V M
i wish i had a capo.
Quote from: Zóôt Threepwood on July 08, 2015, 02:17:33 PM
i wish i had a capo.
I'd send you one of mine but the postage would cost more than the capo itself 8) Guitar capos are kind of like guitar tuners, they're always getting misplaced and about the time you finally make the trip to a music store and buy a new one you find the one that was lost a few days later while you're looking for something else :D
Quote from: V M on July 08, 2015, 05:27:48 PM
I'd send you one of mine but the postage would cost more than the capo itself 8) Guitar capos are kind of like guitar tuners, they're always getting misplaced and about the time you finally make the trip to a music store and buy a new one you find the one that was lost a few days later while you're looking for something else :D
I'm sure I have a bunch of capos, slides, tuners (and dozens of picks) laying around here somewhere, but I only know where some of them are right now. I'm sure the next time I move the couch or clean my workbench I'll find more. LOL
OK, MacGyver time! Take a pencil or pen, put it over the fret you want and secure in place with rubber bands. Instant capo!
Ah yes, golf pencils are great for that 8)
Quote from: V M on July 08, 2015, 05:49:32 PM
Ah yes, golf pencils are great for that 8)
will ikea ones do?´
our only specialized store is pure rubbish. they scammed me a couple of times so i'd rather take the 2 hour trip to cologne than get ripped off.
At work yesterday, a guy that was passing through asks what town he was in and after I told him, he said well, I'll have to remember that I saw a pretty lady in Davis then. I didn't immediately want to kill him, so I suppose that's progress. Although I wish I had been quicker and asked him "really, where?" and then start looking around...
There's always a lot rattling around in my noggin, right now it's a fight between "What can I do to afford FFS and other such things whilst working 3 days a week at near minimum wage", "How can i remove that one hair that keeps vibrating in my left nostril without appearing to pick my nose", and "Oh god the sunburn I got at the weekend is getting INCREDIBLY ITCHY!".
Thinking a lot about--
Across how many months can I slowly and subtly can I arch my eyebrows until the feminine arch becomes what's 'normal' for my look while still in guy-mode.
And even when they are very femininely shaped, will I get looks from people who don't know me?
I know I shouldn't care, butttt--you know.
The sun is down..should be cool here on my balcony. But NOO..feels like a dry sauna.
Saw this topic
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,190982.0.html
Prefer I didn't have to wait to get my experience.
Funny thing about experience, it always takes time.
I'm thinking, "Why am I still awake at 4:31 AM?"
I'm thinking why was I up at 6 after a late night of partying :D
Looks like Rupert is finally getting its day in the sun.
About time.
Wonder if they will find the Grebulons?
Click, hum.
Why on earth do they make women's clothing in a size they call "0X". I know it's supposed to read "Zero X", but to me it looks like "OX"- as in large bovine. Seriously, WTF. Thanks for the insidious body shaming maneuver, a*holes.
Then there's the light on my dashboard that says "SRS" every time I start my engine. EVERY. DAMNED. TIME.
OMG, what did I do in a past life to deserve this?
Quote from: Jill F on July 14, 2015, 01:57:02 PM
Why on earth do they make women's clothing in a size they call "0X". I know it's supposed to read "Zero X", but to me it looks like "OX"- as in large bovine. Seriously, WTF. Thanks for the insidious body shaming maneuver, a*holes.
Then there's the light on my dashboard that says "SRS" every time I start my engine. EVERY. DAMNED. TIME.
OMG, what did I do in a past life to deserve this?
Oh that's cruel Jill :(
Today is the one year tranniversary of my misterectomy.
I went "balls out" on July 15, 2014. Seriously, good riddance.
I'm going to a LGBTQ event in Rapid City this weekend for the first time. I've been told that over a thousand people go to this thing every year. 0.0 If ever there was a time to have a freakout, now would be that time.
Sent from my XT1028 using Tapatalk
Quote from: Jill F on July 15, 2015, 04:34:50 PM
Today is the one year tranniversary of my misterectomy.
I went "balls out" on July 15, 2014. Seriously, good riddance.
Happy Anniversary!
Quote from: Dee Marshall on July 15, 2015, 08:06:22 PM
Happy Anniversary!
Thank you! I can't say I miss them. It's amazing how much better I felt afterward with virtually no T in my system and the daily sturm-und-drang gone forever.
Quote from: Jill F on July 15, 2015, 04:34:50 PM
Today is the one year tranniversary of my misterectomy.
I went "balls out" on July 15, 2014. Seriously, good riddance.
Happy anniversary Jill :icon_bunch:
That is the one op on my bits that I've never regretted. After my own orchi folk I knew would ask me about it and I'd tell them that it was wonderful and it was surgery I'd recommend to anybody. For some reason male friends and relatives would look a bit uncomfortable when I said that :laugh:
Quote from: Lady Smith on July 15, 2015, 09:53:45 PM
After my own orchi folk I knew would ask me about it and I'd tell them that it was wonderful and it was surgery I'd recommend to anybody. For some reason male friends and relatives would look a bit uncomfortable when I said that :laugh:
:D
I remember one time, I suggested that my brother get a vasectomy. He cringed when I said it. I laughed and said: "Oh, hell. It's not that big a deal. I had my balls removed and everything was fine." The look on his face was priceless.
Is it me or have the number of TG stories in the news exploded?
It seems everyday there is a new story, good bad or just plain awful.
We seem to finally be seen as people in the media and not just the focus of others hate.
Quote from: Jenny07 on July 16, 2015, 06:43:12 AM
Is it me or have the number of TG stories in the news exploded?
It seems everyday there is a new story, good bad or just plain awful.
We seem to finally be seen as people in the media and not just the focus of others hate.
Actually whenever I look at FB comments to news articles, many lack understanding us, and those are often most liked. The kind of tone that just discourages me to reply or try to reason.
So, see this -- . I simply don't know what could I possibly say to those people in response.
Story link: https://www.facebook.com/bbcnews/videos/vb.228735667216/10152949685497217/?type=2&theater
(https://www.susans.org/forums/gallery/0/42517-160715111007.png)
Quote from: michellemartine on July 16, 2015, 10:08:29 AM
Story link: https://www.facebook.com/bbcnews/videos/vb.228735667216/10152949685497217/?type=2&theater
(https://www.susans.org/forums/gallery/0/42517-160715111007.png)
Those comments... that's messed up.
You gotta wonder, who's really mentally ill, us or the ones who hate us just for being us?
And again today, more people expressing joy at my return to the store. Maybe they're mentally ill...
Quote from: marsh monster on July 16, 2015, 08:20:58 PM
You gotta wonder, who's really mentally ill, us or the ones who hate us just for being us?
And again today, more people expressing joy at my return to the store. Maybe they're mentally ill...
When I was still working for the adult mental health service I held the view that it was 'normal' people who were the dangerous ones.
Quote from: Alereic on July 16, 2015, 04:21:45 PM
Those comments... that's messed up.
It is screens and screens of it.
And it is also other transsexual topics than Caitlyn's work.
It evokes feeling of rejection and powerlessness to do something about it.
Quote from: Lady Smith on July 16, 2015, 08:44:09 PM
When I was still working for the adult mental health service I held the view that it was 'normal' people who were the dangerous ones.
I used to tell my clients that the only difference between them and people on the street was that they had been diagnosed and most of the people they met hadn't been yet.
Hi Jill & Katherine;
I cannot believe a whole year has gone past since I sat on your front yard with Eva Marie and both of you gorgeous women at your Celebration party. I plan on drinking some Australian Shiraz tonight and will think of all of you
Very best wishes
JudithLynn
(from a freezing Victoria - last night was -1C)
Wow 4,000 posts doesn't feel like you would think it would. Oh well on to another 4,000. ;D
I don't really mind that there are people who choose to live lifestyles of hatefulness, but do they really have to shove it in our face? Can't they just keep that crap private? And the sad part is that many of them practice their hateful lifestyle in front of children.
I post when happy things happen. I post when I'm annoyed, why don't I post when I'm really, really upset?
On topics like this https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,192259.0.html .
I can only read stories and hope one day I will be getting my hrt. :)
A friend of mine opened for Deep Purple last night, hung out with them and even played with their gear after soundcheck.
Yes, I'm jealous.
The other day, something made me ask our county commissioner how he thought a cow would vote if they could vote. After actually thinking about it, then telling me why the cow wouldn't vote republican or democrat, he settled on libertarian. And that's one of the many reasons I will keep voting for him, even though he runs on a republican ticket.
Quote from: marsh monster on July 20, 2015, 07:33:13 PM
The other day, something made me ask our county commissioner how he thought a cow would vote if they could vote. After actually thinking about it, then telling me why the cow wouldn't vote republican or democrat, he settled on libertarian. And that's one of the many reasons I will keep voting for him, even though he runs on a republican ticket.
What was he smoking? We all know cattle vote Green Party.
Just say "Moo?"
Quote from: Jill F on July 20, 2015, 07:37:08 PM
What was he smoking? We all know cattle vote Green Party.
Just say "Moo?"
USA Gold non-filters. go figure. I live in a hardcore republican area. And really, the Green party might have an issue with the methane that cows produce.
When I write, I get so bogged down in the function, rhetoric, and genre of the text that I lose track of the contents of the message.
I need to learn to self-censor a little less and not fuss over elegance. Authenticity now!!
i just cant say what i want or need to say anymore. its like i get blamed for being offensive when in fact that what i said was no where near offensive. imma just keep my mouth shut and not say anything anymore. people wanna talk, fine but no more words from me
Quote from: marsh monster on July 20, 2015, 07:48:18 PM
USA Gold non-filters. go figure. I live in a hardcore republican area. And really, the Green party might have an issue with the methane that cows produce.
Pro tip: don't smoke around flatulent cows.
For someone who is severely allergic to cats, this piece of information is quite disturbing (even if observed at an unusually late date).
Quote from: Anna++ on February 23, 2015, 09:07:16 PM
Maybe! But to be fair, I usually wear t-shirts (even when I'm not at conferences)...
I just investigated a weird sound in my bathroom. I wonder how long I've been sharing a toothbrush with my cat...?
Thoughts: "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...!"
Why do I smell like coconuts?
Quote from: Jill F on July 21, 2015, 09:27:12 PM
Why do I smell like coconuts?
Maybe you would like some? :-)
sperm donation in the lesbian community
The US Postal Service clearly needs better help.
I ordered a birthday gift for my wife through Amazon. For some reason they sent it certified mail and it required a signature. Of course, when it was to be delivered I was out running errands and instead I got a card saying that I needed to pick it up in person. So I stood in a line that didn't move this morning, presented the card, showed my ID and guess what? The idiot clerk told me, "Sorry. This is for J. F." your ID says Gillian. Sorry."
"J is for Jill. It's short for Gillian."
"Is not for you."
"Yes, it is. I don't spell it 'Gill', because people would pronounce it wrong. I spell the short version with a 'J'."
"Sorry, J. F. needs to pick this up."
"That's me. If you won't give it to me, go get your supervisor and have them explain this to me."
*supervisor comes out after 5 minutes or so*
"What is the issue here?"
"I just want my package. Let's see, I clearly had the key to my mailbox, got this card out of it, followed instructions, went to pick it up, showed an ID with the right address and last name on it, and explained that Jill is just short for Gillian. What is the problem here? My dad is named William, but he goes by Bill with a 'B'."
"No problem. Sign here."
Damn, I'm glad my legal name change went through. I'd sure hate to have tried to pick it up with my old ID. *facepalm*
That's why I like my small town. I go to the post office, she knows me, never show id to sign for registered packages.
And oddly enough, the supervisor wants me to train some new lady in paperwork and opening and cash register stuff so she can work at another store. Apparently, they think I do a great job with the paperwork and such and do things the way they want it done at the office. The aggravating part is having to slow myself down and explain what I do and how I do it. So much I do is automatic for me and slowing down to think about it can be hard for me.
Quote from: marsh monster on July 22, 2015, 08:36:55 PM
That's why I like my small town. I go to the post office, she knows me, never show id to sign for registered packages.
Same here, - I couldn't stand living in a large city again.
ultimatums ⊄ love
lacquer fumes coming from neighbor's apartment make me nauseated :(
"It's not that I don't want to workout, but I won't workout if I stay home, and I don't want to get dressed to go to the gym."
Quote from: Sigyn on July 23, 2015, 03:57:10 PM
"It's not that I don't want to workout, but I won't workout if I stay home, and I don't want to get dressed to go to the gym."
Sounds way too familiar. I have issues leaving the house.
I'm thinking that if I don't plant the shrubs I bought yesterday soon, they'll die on me.
I had a strange night last night. Made me wonder...
My wife and I went to her law firm's LGBT event last night at a West Hollywood gay bar and restaurant. The rooftop bar had an amazing view and was mostly full of boystown hipsters. After drinks, we went downstairs and had a nice dinner and conversation. Actually, I think I did most of the talking, ended up cracking a lot of off-the-cuff jokes and ended up with a Flintstones theme song sing-along. We had a gay old time.
We went outside and waited for our Uber driver. And waited... And waited... Well, the bastard blew us off, so we saw it as a sign and walked over to the historic bar across the street because hey, that's what you do when your buzz wears off while waiting for a nonexistent ride... Anyway, we ordered some beers and watched the end of the Dodgers/Mets game and met these really fun (and drunk) girls from Sydney, Australia who were a blast to party with. One of them noticed that my wife and I had matching wedding rings and asked us how long we'd been married. After I told her "over 20 years", she had to ask me how that was even possible. So I told her that I used to be a guy. She almost didn't believe me and kept telling me how blown away she was and would never have guessed in a million years that I was trans. I suppose her being 6'2" as well kinda helped. When the game was over, we went outside and tried for another Uber.
The Uber driver was mega-cool. Long hair, tats, total metalhead. He asked us what kind of music we wanted to hear, so we requested some metal.
"Do you like Rainbow?"
"I freaking LOVE Rainbow! I love love love Ritchie Blackmore."
"Me too. You know the album 'Down to Earth'?"
"Uh, huh... With Graham Bonnet. I have everything. I'm not just a fan, I'm a musician too."
"Me too... I'm actually the guitar player in Graham Bonnet's band."
"No sh*t?! That's a tough gig, considering he sung for Blackmore, Schenker, Malmsteen and Vai. Seriously tough acts to follow!"
"Here's some new stuff." *plays new music*
"Wow, it's actually really good. I'm sorta surprised because I heard him suck mightily in recent times."
"He finally got sober. *chuckles* Anyway, we're playing the Whisky on Saturday. Do you want to come?"
"Sure, we have nothing else on calendar."
"I'll put you on the list..."
How is it that I'm still quite the rocker magnet after transitioning? I suppose our first Uber was meant to blow us off, because now we're seeing Graham Bonnet tomorrow night!
Finally found out why our house is being buzzed by a dozen or more helicopters. Seems the cops shot a guy down the street who was randomly shooting a gun off. At least they shot him dead before he killed anybody.
Ugh... And to think we live in the "nice" part of town.
I'm thinking that gardening in Zone 3a is a fool's errand. :(
I'm thinking that I suffer from paw in mouth disease.
I had a dream last night that had me waking up crying. How is it that my Dad disown in me doesn't bother me in the least. But seeing Caleb again in my dream just shatters my heart? I really do miss him. I don't get it. I've lost friends loads of times and not lost a wink of sleep. But Caleb continues to haunt me. He may feel he has no place in my life, but it seems he has no problem occupying a special place in my heart and dreams.
I'm thinking that sometimes we lose perspective. My close friends know I had a bad night last night, waves of depression hit like a tsunami.
What triggered it?
I gave my wife a kindle, she finally found a way to read after years of not being able too (she can't hold a book or turn the pages as she only has one functional hand). She has loved it, reading book after book.
Then one of her carers dropped it. It is broken and she was in tears, the gift of reading had gone.
It hit me how lucky I am, it struck me that my silly concerns are just that, silly. I fell into a funk upset for the loneliness and helplessness she is in.
I was ashamed of being such a selfish person.
She will have a new Kindle tomorrow.
I have a new attitude today.
Its funny, I found out today that the lady I am training is going to replace the lady that replaced me at the other store last year when I left abruptly...
Hilarious really. but the lady she will be replacing doesn't know it yet. So I have to keep reminding her that she is not to say anything to people about where she will end up, just that she's training, let them assume what they want beyond that.
Its still weird that they want me and only me to train her. Apparently they spoke highly of me, that's probably why they broke their own rule about bringing people back after they leave the company.
it's funny how one sleepless night can completely change your sleeping habits. i used to stay up until 3-4 am. nowadays i don't want to. I try to wrap things up at 12 am at the latest.
Quote from: Zóôt Threepwood on July 26, 2015, 04:24:54 PM
it's funny how one sleepless night can completely change your sleeping habits. i used to stay up until 3-4 am. nowadays i don't want to. I try to wrap things up at 12 am at the latest.
You'd better be in bed no later than 11 pm on a weeknight, young man!!!
Quote from: marsh monster on July 26, 2015, 04:40:04 PM
You'd better be in bed no later than 11 pm on a weeknight, young man!!!
i'm enjoying my holidays.
I cannot brain today I have the dumb.
Been thinking about photography. Got a tentative shoot lined up and she wants some tasteful boudoir shots done. So I gotta plan some soft lighting setups.
Nice long weekend.
Saw a brief on 4 corners tonight on Trans people in Australia.
Looked not to be a positive thing but showing just how marginalised we are.
It brings out all of my fears any why I'm terrified by all this.
I fear to watch it. :(
Marmite is yum! :D
I knew I was dog tired last night and that I would crash pretty hard, wasn't quite figuring on sleeping for 12 hours though...
Welp, I got my harddrive on my laptop cleaned up a little and repartitioned to make room for win 10 and already have my 7 upgraded to it. so far seems fast and not too much different, but still just exploring the new.
Quote from: marsh monster on August 09, 2015, 06:58:25 PM
Welp, I got my harddrive on my laptop cleaned up a little and repartitioned to make room for win 10 and already have my 7 upgraded to it. so far seems fast and not too much different, but still just exploring the new.
I got fed up with the whole Windows thing and changed to Debian Linux instead.
That my room's an absolute mess and I should get back to cleaning it. Been carting stuff around for nearly a decade now, so I've been going through and throwing out stuff I no longer need, or ever needed in the first place. I've gone from three full 52L tubs to one and a half, and also found heaps more notebooks than I ever thought I had. All empty or partially scribbled through. As the saying goes, a cluttered space is a cluttered mind and I can relate to that saying, at least with the room I spend the most time in. Not looking forward to working on my cupboard, I have all sorts of things in there ranging from tools to glow in the dark skeletons.
hmmm workout or fold laundry?
Why can't I just sleep in peace?
I've freaking had it with passwords. How am I supposed to remember over a hundred of them, especially when I am required to switch them from time to time for "security reasons"?
"Please enter your new secure password. It must contain 10-26 characters, two or more upper case letters, a number, a symbol, no spaces, a heiroglyphic, a Greek letter and a Chinese character."
I can't wait for the day where all I have to do is give my middle fingerprint.
Quote from: Jill F on August 12, 2015, 07:44:47 PM
I've freaking had it with passwords. How am I supposed to remember over a hundred of them, especially when I am required to switch them from time to time for "security reasons"?
"Please enter your new secure password. It must contain 10-26 characters, two or more upper case letters, a number, a symbol, no spaces, a heiroglyphic, a Greek letter and a Chinese character."
I can't wait for the day where all I have to do is give my middle fingerprint.
This morning when I woke my laptop up, it wanted to know the last password I had used on the computer in order to unlock it. Not the password I log into the laptop with, but the actual last one I had typed in while doing something in a browser. Took me a minute, but I did finally recall what I had last signed into last night. I'm not sure this Windows 10 thing is a good thing yet.
What Was I Thinking With The Poem I Wrote Earlier Today?
All but the last stanza are more like something an emo would write.
My soul is dead,
my spirit is as black as the night
my window won't close (a reference to my suicide attempt in 2013)
i am an empty husk
but luckily by the time i wrote the last stanza i began to lighten up and made fun of how I felt by writing along the lines of (it rhymes in german):
oh lighten up you idiot
you're an ace
life tends to be good
i then drew (badly) a gravestone with "* BIRTH DATE + NOT FOR A LONG TIME" and a flower to show the contrast on the paper.
yeah, i had a bit of a rough morning.
i needed to exorcise some dark thoughts and it helped. it took me another hour to come back to the land of the living mood-wise, but hey, beggars can't be choosers.
i then gave the poem the title (obviously translated): A Journey Through My Mind.
I hate working on Sundays, but at least I'm working....for now....
My foot hurts a little. I wonder if it is from being on my feet all day.
Been a good weekend, went over to the island, relaxed, fished and got some sun. I did catch 6 and 3/4 fish. The partial fish is because he lost his back end to a hungry blue fish while I was reeling him in.
Can't believe I just turned down backstage and VIP for Shania Twain.
This week sucks.
Quote from: Jill F on August 18, 2015, 12:25:18 AM
Can't believe I just turned down backstage and VIP for Shania Twain.
This week sucks.
That don't impress me much... :D
a previous reply I made referencing Max Headroom made me think of:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmWZseVWxN4
Although I feel that some of their skits are bit inappropriate and maybe sometimes even a bit insulting, I love watching late night talk shows
Their silliness is such a great escape and relief from the mundane and often anal retentive attitudes of so much of society in general
Sure, they touch on social and political issues but they don't have a particular agenda or out to prove or disprove anyone or anything, they just have a bit of fun with it
Sometimes I think the "Fun" part of life is missing far too often
I miss the Soviets as America's "bad guys"... it was an excuse for the government to feel like they were 'doing something', but I don't know anyone who seriously believed in Red Dawn.
And now I am down. One of those days when life seems pointless. Seeing most women triggers dysphoria. I suppose in a few days it may go away, but being transsexual is such a horrible life...
I will be okay later, until that one time when I won't.
Felt like sharing.
I am better today.
Why did I take 2 days off from gym training... I hurt so so bad.
Thinking it's a small world! :laugh:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F20150822_175613_zpsuv9oypfs.jpg&hash=585461c702d470d4daa9083394a02f6c7538fc77)
Thinking about something my endo said on Tuesday. He had been reviewing my records as he hadn't seen me in some months. He checked some things I had said about my low testosterone in the 10 years prior to HRT and then asked me when I expect to have insurance again. He wants to get some extra tests to check some theory he has. I'm wondering what he suspects.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on August 22, 2015, 05:04:37 PM
Thinking it's a small world! :laugh:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F20150822_175613_zpsuv9oypfs.jpg&hash=585461c702d470d4daa9083394a02f6c7538fc77)
my doppleganger. was wondering where she went to
Recently I've been thinking about the nature of fate and destiny. I have been concentrating on the idea that time may not actually be linear and is only perceived that way by us. This moves into a thought that what makes up destiny is core to ourselves then, because it's based on decisions we can't necessarily change in this reality we live in. I also think about the idea of changing such a reality then, and how one would go about changing something that would conform to meet it's balance to any attempted major change.
I'm thoroughly disgusted with people. They think they know something, so they run their mouth outing you to other people. And seriously, why do they even need to talk about someone they don't really know? Are their lives that devoid of anything interesting enough to keep their tiny little minds occupied? I'm seriously regretting staying where I am at, even the people that are "supportive" are freaking idiots when it comes to this. And people say that we're the messed up ones...
Anyhoo, I'm going to get a bit drunk tonight to calm myself a bit before I actually do something that I and others would surely regret.
Time isn't linear, it curves.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.spille.de%2FCMS%2Fcomponents%2Fcom_virtuemart%2Fshop_image%2Fproduct%2F447.jpg&hash=44ccf111e0964a2d92c8ffbb42e34ae30157518a)
čevapčiči come from Serbia, NOT FROM BOSNIA!!!! :icon_chainsaw: :icon_burn: :icon_burn: :icon_burn:
What you google while dreaming isn't always trustworthy.
If one chases a dog while the dog chases a parked car, one cannot blame the cat for the aftermath of the results
LIFE UPDATE
Star Trek Renegades is wrapped up. Now its going to become a web series. Woohoo!!
The other day I lost another Facebook "friend". No real idea who they are and at this point I could not give a damn. their mysoginistic comments about how real women all desire to have a child really pissed me off. They basically said all women were are baby factories. And wow did I give them a verbal smack down of epic proportions on them. So much so, they ended up blocking me. I think it's true that you can sense others like you, because this person gave off the wrong vibe. Totally transitioning for the wrong reasons. That kind of person who just doesn't have a clue.
Before that it was a friend I was actually beginning to let my walls down for. But, I couldn't have that. So I pushed her away. She kept telling me how great Washington state Obama care was, covering things like hair removal, SRS, BA.... like it would really be that easy for me. NOTHING in my transition has been easy, and that kind of talk made me actually believe there could actually be a ray of hope hell, until I told my wife all that, we were actually going to move there. Now all of a sudden she wants to move to Oregon instead. Being single again just keeps looking better and better. I like it on the road enough that I won't be home until November. Maybe January. Maybe forever...
Mod Edit- Please remember that singling out anyone person as group as invalid is against TOS 9. Also please watch the foul language.
I'm thinking I wish I could wake up tomorrow and be the hot girl on the outside that i feel like on the inside
Jessi
I'm thinking it's amazing how folk will walk out of shops and onto the pavement without looking. If I'm riding my tricycle I've come so close to running into them; - If I'm walking with my stick they just about knock me off my feet.
Opera Browser is much better than Firefox, IE or Chrome!
In the words of one Forrest Gump, "I gotta go pee."
Beyond that, I am just free thinking. Letting thoughts float and settle or drift around in my head if they need to.
I believe that every problem between people is because we think WE KNOW BETTER.
We are always tempted to interfere, and sometimes it seems only right to do so. If one person is trying to force another, is it wrong to interfere? Is it less wrong than not interfering? Sometimes (often) I'm tempted to interfere, but is it right?
We collect ourselves into groups, small or large, that believe (mostly) the same things, that validate our own half understandings and call that "ultimate truth". Then, collectively, we try to impose our beliefs on others FOR THEIR OWN GOOD. But I don't believe these things are "ultimate truth". I don't believe that human beings are capable of comprehending "ultimate truth". I think that, if some Source, some Deity, some Higher Power handed us "ultimate truth" on a silver platter, as many people believe has happened, we'd still get it wrong.
There is really only one thing on which any of us is an authority. Each of us is an authority on ourselves. Not a perfect authority, but more of an authority than anyone else can possibly be. When it comes to a conflict and I think the other person should do things my way, I bow to authority. Mostly. I'm not perfect. Sometimes I mess that up. See paragraph one.
But then, this is just what I believe.
Why am at work right now? Being in bed would be such a better option
Even though I wasn't close to her, I do sometimes wonder what my mother would have thought of me now. She died 33 years ago today when I was 19.
People can you please stop trying to coach the jockey and your teams through the TV's while I'm on. I understand you may have a bit of money on the results, but studies have proven that they CAN NOT hear you. Please you are all too loud for me
Mmm I'm thinking about having another cookie, but it's late and I haven't worked out at ALL this weekend.
Quote from: QueenSwag on September 13, 2015, 11:58:47 PM
Mmm I'm thinking about having another cookie, but it's late and I haven't worked out at ALL this weekend.
Its never too late for a cookie! Go for it!
Wait, are you the marsh monster or the cookie monster? ;)
I'm thinking that I want to make some cookies.
Please fold your tables and return your chairs to their upright position. The Hayne Plane will be touching down at Levi Stadium shortly. Thank you for once again flying Ozhype Air
I'm thinking about trading stocks again. It's practically the only way I can make money. Alas, I have little to start with. Instead of VFS, I'll give my cash to Charles Schwab. Oh well. I did it once before. Why not once more?
Cindi
Cookies.......snicker doodles please!!!!!
Quote from: Jill F on September 14, 2015, 08:08:41 PM
I'm thinking that I want to make some cookies.
I've got some peanut brownies here with me at the moment, - they are yum :D
I'm thinking people are making me hungry with all the cookies and brownies talk when I should be getting some sleep. Hugs
Mariah
I'm more interested in some pizza, maybe not the breakfast of champions - But hey, I put some bacon on it
I see several of my neighbors having pizza delivered and that's fine for them, but I like to make my own because I can make a better pizza for a fraction of the cost
I'm actually thinking about finding out how I might attend a culinary school, I am often complimented on the food I make and people have told me that I should open my own restaurant
I've been practicing and learning over the past 10 years by trial and error with recipes I find online and feel that my dishes have been coming out on par for my target demographic, but I understand that I will need a certificate from an established and respected school of culinary arts to be taken seriously
Yes, I am in my mid 50's and deal with spinal and various other injuries, but I enjoy making good food and feel that the only time it is too late is when I lay down and close my eyes for good
I don't know how or if I can do it, but it is what I've been thinking about for quite awhile
Hugs
Quote from: V M on September 15, 2015, 07:44:46 AM
I'm actually thinking about finding out how I might attend a culinary school, I am often complimented on the food I make and people have told me that I should open my own restaurant
I've been practicing and learning over the past 10 years by trial and error with recipes I find online and feel that my dishes have been coming out on par for my target demographic, but I understand that I will need a certificate from an established and respected school of culinary arts to be taken seriously
Yes, I am in my mid 50's and deal with spinal and various other injuries, but I enjoy making good food and feel that the only time it is too late is when I lay down and close my eyes for good
I don't know how or if I can do it, but it is what I've been thinking about for quite awhile
Hugs
That's so awesome. I recently rediscovered cooking myself. (Wait, should there be a comma between "cooking" and "myself"? That didn't come out quite right...) I worked in a couple of kitchens in college, but I learned to hate doing the same thing over and over, especially in the summer heat, so I stopped cooking. I suppose the good news is that I make sick pizzas from scratch now without thinking.
If my wife somehow gets disbarred or we ever run into a big enough pile of cash, we are so opening a restaurant.
Oh, and tonight I'm making Thai food.
I used to keep my thoughts to myself, mostly. HRT has really made me an opinionated b|π∆¿.
Oh, and eating wasabi peas then touching your slightly damp forehead has unintended consequences.
Another: I don't care for the usage "trans*". I keep looking for the footnote.
My dog needs a bath, and why is she laying on pile of clothes?
Short skirts plus wind equal interesting times for Gypsy when she is outside
Quote from: immortal gypsy on September 17, 2015, 02:16:41 AM
Short skirts plus wind equal interesting times for Gypsy when she is outside
Interesting times for other people, too, no doubt! :D
I'm thinking about a situation I just posted about in "Arrg!", and yes, this is a blatant attempt to get you to look. Careful, as in most of that subforum, it could be triggering.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on September 16, 2015, 12:36:03 PM
Another: I don't care for the usage "trans*". I keep looking for the footnote.
*gender
It's awkward for me too, kinda like when you hear a song that gets cut before the chord progression resolves.
So let me get this straight, haters- if you aren't 100% upfront to the world about being trans, you're being deceitful, but if you are, you're just "ramming your agenda down everyone's throats".
So what's a transwoman supposed to do here, haters? Help me out on this one.
Hate is a political decision, - fear is a human emotion.
So as the effects of E mount to the point of male fail I now feel uncertain and afraid. Definitely not what I ever expected.
I love being me don't get me wrong but as the time gets closer I feel alone and scared.
I guess I am not alone with this feeling.
Quote from: Jenny07 on September 18, 2015, 04:23:20 AM
So as the effects of E mount to the point of male fail I now feel uncertain and afraid. Definitely not what I ever expected.
I love being me don't get me wrong but as the time gets closer I feel alone and scared.
I guess I am not alone with this feeling.
Jenny,
I do not mean this in anyway insulting to anyone.
You have a very high power job. As do I.
This can make transition extremely difficult - or in contrast, very easy.
I, for example, basically told everyone to deal with it or deal with me. I didn't realise until much later how confronting that was to my staff and employer.
They could not afford to lose me, so they had to accept me. My transition was not a problem for me - but for others. I knew what I had to do. It took me years to realise this.
There are others in the same position, Warlockmaker, for example, has facd her unique situation. She, and I, could have lost the lot. We have a lot to lose.
In a way, we don't transition, the work place does.
You Sis are in the same place. You are vital to your organisation. They cannot afford to lose you.
At some point of life you need to make the decision of what you want to do for your future. You have the same brain, albeit transformed into a female thinking and feeling one, but still the same skill and insight.
Your company knows that they need you. You are a highly valuable asset (hate that concept!) and they do not want you to take your skill to another company.
Jenny, you are in control. You may not have realised that because you may still be fighting your transition?
You make your move when you are comfy, but make it for you and don't be frightened.
BTW, I will add one other thing.
Since I came out and started to be political, I have found to that many of the leaders of commerce and politics are, can we say, gender fluid. You may be surprised how well you are accepted !
Cindy
Is there a more dehumanizing phrase than "human resources"?
I'm thinking I'm hungry. Sometimes I feel like I could eat the whole kitchen if I had time enough to cook all of it and all the spices and sauces I wanted.
There is definitely a reason some people refer to board games as bored games and let us not forget to name someone the Chairman of the Bored, oh well, boring is as boring does ::)
I should get a snack, but I should wait for dinner... I'll probably wait for dinner and just doodle a little bit.
Right now I'm thinking about which penis prosthetic to buy from Emisil ;D
I'm trying to decide for the night's entertainment.
Video games or childhood cartoon marathon?
Arrrr!!! Shiver me timbers, but Sept.19th be international Talk Like a Pirate Day!!!
You can always trust the untrustworthy because you can always trust that they will be untrustworthy. Its the trustworthy you can't trust.
Only I could have a job where I payout someone $250 extra one day. THEN have to do everyone's pays, (the boss included) that very next week
Humans didn't evolve from apes, they evolved from anal retentive squirrels and other rodents
Mother's logic
"Mum I'm trans and I'm now transitioning to female"
"Ok you do what you have to do"
"Mum I now have a girlfriend" (me)
"Well if she makes you happy, I'm glad for the both of you"
"Mum I've decided to take on a more vegetarian diet"
"But baby can I still cook you bacon and eggs for breakfast, when you come up for your holiday . You use to love your bacon and eggs"
Freaky day is freaky because I had a machine that's classified as dangerous and weighing ~2,5 metric tons under my behind and I had to turn it 180 degrees.
A fricky-fracking forklift.
Quote from: V M on September 22, 2015, 10:40:37 PM
Humans didn't evolve from apes, they evolved from anal retentive squirrels and other rodents
germans to be precise evolved from them.
I'm thinking that I should probably say something interesting in this thread, but now my mind has gone blank and I can't think of anything other than thinking of something to say. Oh wait, terraria. Minecraft. Dragon Age. Xbox.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
I used to want to live in New York, but from what I've heard, the weapons laws seem pretty strict. I want to be able to legally have a bunch of guns in my place, so NY may not be the place for me. I need to check out states with looser gun laws. Open carry would be nice, but concealed carry works for me.
Quote from: King Malachite on September 29, 2015, 01:30:33 AM
I used to want to live in New York, but from what I've heard, the weapons laws seem pretty strict. I want to be able to legally have a bunch of guns in my place, so NY may not be the place for me. I need to check out states with looser gun laws. Open carry would be nice, but concealed carry works for me.
Come to the land of the Desert Sun.
#1 in gun laws for the past 5 years.
concealed carry permit? What's that?
Well, last night was fun until it ended abruptly. We saw AC/DC at Dodger Stadium. Normally I don't go to concerts there as it's a pretty sucky venue, but we figured it might be the last chance to ever see them, so we splurged for seats up front. We were third row center from the stage and front row for the catwalk. Unfortunately, StubHub were complete bastards about how the tickets were to be delivered to us and we had to wait an hour while the will call tried to sort it out. Then there were lines to get in other lines to get in yet more lines, and then there were beer lines and ultimately, "beer return lines". Having an estimated 2:1 M/F ratio here was advantageous for that.
The concert was pretty awesome, and I definitely got a couple of master class guitar lessons in from Angus. My pick slides and reinforced flutters and bends will never be the same. I sang all of Bon Scott's songs at the top of my lungs. Apparently I can still nail Bon and could still gig some of those songs today. "Big Balls", anyone?
Getting out was even worse than getting in. We thought we could just sit in our seats to wait out the exodus, but we were quickly booted by security. We walked all around the place to the taxi area, but no cab would take us. Uber was way overloaded and traffic out was complete gridlock, so we walked all the way out into a really crappy neighborhood where traffic wasn't as bad. While we waited on the street for an Uber, we got to encounter some serious lowlife creeps. One extremely drunk guy came up and said some pretty lewd things to us before he decided that we could probably take him down pretty easily. I was literally a fraction of a second from knocking him out cold before he found the sense to get away from us. Then there were the catcalls from passing cars. I didn't realize how "fine" or effable I must actually be. (Seriously, how many guys in the history of mankind ever got laid after a crude catcall? What idiots...) Fortunately, our Uber showed up before we were assaulted or raped. The Uber driver was super cool and a total metalhead who sang in a death metal band. He was stoked that we liked the music he was blasting. Apparently most passengers he gets don't like metal. He'll be driving us to and from concerts in the future privately.
So yes, my ears are still ringing, but Angus can wreck my hearing any time he wants to.
It's all my tummy's fault
First off my stomach pipes up "I'm hungry" So my brain replies "So cook up some food, fish tacos sound good"
So then the rest of my body chimes in "But we're sore and tired and don't feel like cooking tonight, can't we just go out to eat?"
Where upon my brain responds "No, you're broke and your feet kinda smell, so you're going to have to make due with what you've got on hand"
So I guess I'll be in the kitchen barefoot but not pregnant and making fish tacos ::)
Oh, and I hate election years :P
Quote from: Jill F on September 29, 2015, 03:45:09 PM
Well, last night was fun until it ended abruptly. We saw AC/DC at Dodger Stadium. Normally I don't go to concerts there as it's a pretty sucky venue, but we figured it might be the last chance to ever see them, so we splurged for seats up front. We were third row center from the stage and front row for the catwalk. Unfortunately, StubHub were complete bastards about how the tickets were to be delivered to us and we had to wait an hour while the will call tried to sort it out. Then there were lines to get in other lines to get in yet more lines, and then there were beer lines and ultimately, "beer return lines". Having an estimated 2:1 M/F ratio here was advantageous for that.
The concert was pretty awesome, and I definitely got a couple of master class guitar lessons in from Angus. My pick slides and reinforced flutters and bends will never be the same. I sang all of Bon Scott's songs at the top of my lungs. Apparently I can still nail Bon and could still gig some of those songs today. "Big Balls", anyone?
Getting out was even worse than getting in. We thought we could just sit in our seats to wait out the exodus, but we were quickly booted by security. We walked all around the place to the taxi area, but no cab would take us. Uber was way overloaded and traffic out was complete gridlock, so we walked all the way out into a really crappy neighborhood where traffic wasn't as bad. While we waited on the street for an Uber, we got to encounter some serious lowlife creeps. One extremely drunk guy came up and said some pretty lewd things to us before he decided that we could probably take him down pretty easily. I was literally a fraction of a second from knocking him out cold before he found the sense to get away from us. Then there were the catcalls from passing cars. I didn't realize how "fine" or effable I must actually be. (Seriously, how many guys in the history of mankind ever got laid after a crude catcall? What idiots...) Fortunately, our Uber showed up before we were assaulted or raped. The Uber driver was super cool and a total metalhead who sang in a death metal band. He was stoked that we liked the music he was blasting. Apparently most passengers he gets don't like metal. He'll be driving us to and from concerts in the future privately.
So yes, my ears are still ringing, but Angus can wreck my hearing any time he wants to.
Yea, though I walk through the Valley of The Shadow of Amps, I shall hear no riffs,
....for Angus has taken my hearing too! :laugh:
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Sigyn on September 29, 2015, 01:38:52 AM
Come to the land of the Desert Sun.
#1 in gun laws for the past 5 years.
concealed carry permit? What's that?
Is that Arizona?
It's raining, - how unusual :(
How nice.
I have a 4km trip to cycle and it's raining. Not to mention the wind warning that's been issued in this area.
So amused.
Could someone PLEASE invent compact disc packaging that doesn't wreck your manicure when you try to open it for the first time?
Guys, when you come up with packaging schemes, please keep in mind that women with pretty nails need to open them too.
Quote from: Jill F on October 10, 2015, 05:26:11 PM
Could someone PLEASE invent compact disc packaging that doesn't wreck your manicure when you try to open it for the first time?
Guys, when you come up with packaging schemes, please keep in mind that women with pretty nails need to open them too.
I find a small pocket knife, steak knife or the edge of a pair of open scissors works pretty well, I just run the blade along the edge where the CD opens 8)
Quote from: V M on October 10, 2015, 05:56:40 PM
I find a small pocket knife, steak knife or the edge of a pair of open scissors works pretty well, I just run the blade along the edge where the CD opens 8)
Note to self: invent Swiss Army nails.
(https://sp.yimg.com/xj/th?id=OIP.Mfcfd125fe075d6c65e37f494d49a555eo0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300)
+
(https://sp.yimg.com/xj/th?id=OIP.Mdd4f32bec94bbebda7ec2c1172f5f737H0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300)
?
Could double as Cat Woman claws for Halloween ;D
(https://sp.yimg.com/xj/th?id=OIP.Ma8173dcf44652fdbc7e8e6f76f561204o0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=212&h=157)
Quote from: V M on October 10, 2015, 08:55:28 PM
(https://sp.yimg.com/xj/th?id=OIP.Mfcfd125fe075d6c65e37f494d49a555eo0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300)
+
(https://sp.yimg.com/xj/th?id=OIP.Mdd4f32bec94bbebda7ec2c1172f5f737H0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300)
?
Could double as Cat Woman claws for Halloween ;D
(https://sp.yimg.com/xj/th?id=OIP.Ma8173dcf44652fdbc7e8e6f76f561204o0&pid=15.1&P=0&w=212&h=157)
I will be needing a corkscrew, a potato peeler, chopsticks, mascara brush, and a date with Johnny "Edward Scissorhands" Depp then.
I am going to put a woman I work with up for a significant annual women's award that was sent around today via email.
She is brilliant so I will nominate her.
Her boss loved the idea when I emailed him to keep it hush hush.
Love to see her win as she deserves it.
Funny, we seem very alike which makes it very easy to work with her.
Makes it enjoyable to go to work, but don't let her draw a diagram...
2015 has been a tough one to swallow so far.
Dear friends, please stop dying at your own hands. If you're doing hard drugs or feeling suicidal, please get help right away. When you die, please remember that you are killing a little piece of all of your friends and family members as well.
Quote from: Jill F on October 19, 2015, 05:23:37 PM
2015 has been a tough one to swallow so far.
Dear friends, please stop dying at your own hands. If you're doing hard drugs or feeling suicidal, please get help right away. When you die, please remember that you are killing a little piece of all of your friends and family members as well.
This+
Jill, some days that thought is the only thing keeping me alive, then I see that things are actually, gradually, getting better day by day. I was down, (and wrote a post), about how being "sirred'" so much on our vacation hurt me. I mentioned that to Sweetie and she pointed out I was "ma'amed" or included in "ladies" quite a bit, too. Best part is, Sweetie, who has the most problem with this, is the one who pointed it out! Sometimes we get in a mood where we only see the bad and not the good. This is when life is most dangerous. This is why we have Susan's.
I love this song and the video too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DsPT7m9SmUw
That's a pretty powerful video.
I've listened to it for 2 days so far and got the album.
Wow! That is one powerful song and video. Thanks for sharing it with us Rainbow Dash.
This morning, I felt a strange kinship with Cthulhu.
The time I spent asleep was described by others as "aeons", I only woke up because a star was in the right place, and when I left my house of R'lyeh bedroom, everybody around me had completely lost their sanity.
33 month on HRT: estradiol still seeking for any receptors
Quote from: Jill F on October 19, 2015, 05:23:37 PM
2015 has been a tough one to swallow so far.
Dear friends, please stop dying at your own hands. If you're doing hard drugs or feeling suicidal, please get help right away. When you die, please remember that you are killing a little piece of all of your friends and family members as well.
Someone very close to me died of a heroin overdose 20 years ago; I didn't know she was using it, and it took about 15 years for me to come to terms with happened.
Birkin contacted me. I was so happy to hear from him. And it was hard. Because I still care for him. The feelings I have for him just won't go away. Which led him to suggest I may have Borderline Personality Disorder.
I would normally scoff at such a suggestion. But Birkin is the only person I've ever let get close to me. But, I trust him. And he has no reason to lie. So now I wonder if perhaps it's true...
Quote from: Rainbow Dash on October 26, 2015, 11:35:29 PM
Birkin contacted me. I was so happy to hear from him. And it was hard. Because I still care for him. The feelings I have for him just won't go away. Which led him to suggest I may have Borderline Personality Disorder.
I would normally scoff at such a suggestion. But Birkin is the only person I've ever let get close to me. But, I trust him. And he has no reason to lie. So now I wonder if perhaps it's true...
I miss Birkin. I was playing the Resident Evil 6 demo, and was thinking about him. :)
I'm wondering why the thread about tgboards was locked so quickly that I posted in today. I mean, if it was left open a bit longer someone might have been able to answer my question as to where the board has migrated to. There are many people from that place who are also in this place - I recognize them or they have the same names; they might know something I don't and would have been able to tell me (and others) in that discussion. Just because this site isn't affiliated with that site means members of both places can't talk about it here? How else am I supposed to find information out about what happened apart from asking publicly. I don't know these people personally.
Quote from: T.K.G.W. on October 30, 2015, 11:31:54 AM
I'm wondering why the thread about tgboards was locked so quickly that I posted in today. I mean, if it was left open a bit longer someone might have been able to answer my question as to where the board has migrated to. There are many people from that place who are also in this place - I recognize them or they have the same names; they might know something I don't and would have been able to tell me (and others) in that discussion. Just because this site isn't affiliated with that site means members of both places can't talk about it here? How else am I supposed to find information out about what happened apart from asking publicly. I don't know these people personally.
Easy answer, TOS #1. We don't allow advertising of other sites. I ran another site, but wasn't allowed to post about it here. You're not being singled out, and it wasn't your post that resulted in the thread being locked.
Hugs, Devlyn
Dear creepy stalky internet pervs, and yes, I know some of you are here reading this- I'm happily married. I am not looking to hook up, have phone sex or send you pictures. If I ever encounter you in person, you will regret it. #notyourJILF
Life is a tragedy
Quote from: Jill F on November 03, 2015, 06:28:07 PM
Dear creepy stalky internet pervs, and yes, I know some of you are here reading this- I'm happily married. I am not looking to hook up, have phone sex or send you pictures. If I ever encounter you in person, you will regret it. #notyourJILF
Usually my spam filter will catch most of these spammers, but some leak through
What they do is attach the name of someone you are familiar with to try to make the email look legit, I've even received bogus emails supposedly from our dear friend Cindy among others only to find out it was some spammer phishing for info.
But something about the emails didn't look quite right so I hovered over the sender area to see who the sender actually was and sure enough it turned out to be some spammer
I imagine some folks may have noticed that I have a bit of a hard on for smackin' up spammers
Anyway, most likely the creepy stalky internet pervs are not here reading this but are rather just going about spamming their creepy stalky internet perv stuff all over the web
By the way, would you like to buy a cigar smoking ceramic pig? :D
Hugs
Quote from: V M on November 04, 2015, 12:54:36 AM
Quote from: Jill F on November 03, 2015, 06:28:07 PM
Dear creepy stalky internet pervs, and yes, I know some of you are here reading this- I'm happily married. I am not looking to hook up, have phone sex or send you pictures. If I ever encounter you in person, you will regret it. #notyourJILF
Usually my spam filter will catch most of these spammers, but some leak through
What they do is attach the name of someone you are familiar with to try to make the email look legit, I've even received bogus emails supposedly from our dear friend Cindy among others only to find out it was some spammer phishing for info.
But something about the emails didn't look quite right so I hovered over the sender area to see who the sender actually was and sure enough it turned out to be some spammer
I imagine some folks may have noticed that I have a bit of a hard on for smackin' up spammers
Anyway, most likely the creepy stalky internet pervs are not here reading this but are rather just going about spamming their creepy stalky internet perv stuff all over the web
By the way, would you like to buy a cigar smoking ceramic pig? :D
Hugs
Oh Hon that is terrible! I didn't know people were using my name to spam!
I only ever spam Nigerian Bank Managers wives whose partner recently died in a helicopter crash and left them 20 million. ::)
Quote from: Cindy on November 04, 2015, 01:00:42 AM
Oh Hon that is terrible! I didn't know people were using my name to spam!
I only ever spam Nigerian Bank Managers wives whose partner recently died in a helicopter crash and left them 20 million. ::)
It was terrible, but most of it has stopped since my desktop died and I got the laptop
I still get plenty of spam but my spam filter catches most of it and I've learned better what to look for 8)
When that type of spamming was new I was accused of either sending it or having a virus on my computer. It took a while to prove that people just filter email addresses out of internet traffic or, if YOU have a virus, out of your own contact list.
Quote from: King Malachite on October 29, 2015, 10:16:42 PM
I miss Birkin. I was playing the Resident Evil 6 demo, and was thinking about him. :)
I miss him too. He said he is dating an old friend of his, someone that I have spoken to online once or twice. I wish them all the happiness in the world. I will always have feelings for him but we just weren't meant to be. But, if he ever needs me, I will be there for him, as he was for me. Perhaps in our next life....
Quote from: Rainbow Dash on November 04, 2015, 10:33:51 PM
I miss him too. He said he is dating an old friend of his, someone that I have spoken to online once or twice. I wish them all the happiness in the world. I will always have feelings for him but we just weren't meant to be. But, if he ever needs me, I will be there for him, as he was for me. Perhaps in our next life....
*hugs* Well....at least you have an awesome truck! ;)
What is your name?
What is your quest?
What is the average cooldown time on banana bread before I can eat it?
I am writing a short tale and thinking about making an extra cup of coffee.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on November 08, 2015, 06:45:11 PM
What is your name?
What is your quest?
What is the average cooldown time on banana bread before I can eat it?
Haha this is fun. What about i answer this and you answer my questions?
My name is clara eleanor brown (getting it legally changed soon) i am an author. 32, lesbian, gemini, my mbti is enfp and i love to play drums guitar and ride my bicycle.
Please share your banana bread recipe with me.
What is your zodiac sign? What is your dream in this life?
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Ingredients
2 1/2 cups sifted flour
3 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1 cup sugar
1/4 cup soft butter or margarine
1 egg, beaten
1 cup mashed ripe banana (3 small bananas)
2 tbsp. grated orange peel, or 1 tbsp. grated lemon peel
1/2 cup milk
1 cup coarsely chopped walnuts or pecans
(I didn't have nuts, substituted orange extract for the peels, and I added cinnamon.)
Directions
1
Preheat oven to 350° and grease a 9x5x3 inch loaf pan.
2
Sift flour with baking powder and salt; set aside.
3
In medium bowl, using electric hand-held mixer or wooden spoon, beat sugar, butter and egg until smooth. Add bananas, orange or lemon peel and milk, mixing well.
4
Add in flour mixture, beating just until smooth. Stir in nuts if desired.
5
Pour batter into prepared pan; bake about 1 hour or until cake tester inserted in center comes out clean. Let cool at least ten minutes before serving.
"What is your zodiac sign? What is your dream in this life?"
Sagittarius. Winning untold riches...so I can give it away. :)
Hugs, Devlyn
I used to make a yeast risen banana bread which was very nice, though it didn't have some of the extra yummy ingredients you put in yours Devlyn. :D
Spooky, I'm just making some muffins. Choc, mandarin and poppy seed.
The worst part is not being able to go into the kitchen until the first tray is ready. Or I just get impatient and eat the batter
Ooooh....my stomach. :/ Those Doritos.....
No-one loves me :P Blah
Sitting here alone tonight.
Was asked to step up at work today to a senior manager role as my boss resigned.
They are panicking as to what to do so who was the first person they turned to?
I have told them I will do what they think best but not manage people.
Been there done that, no thanks. No good with my issues too much stress.
Currently assigned to other work and they want to keep me so they need to sort it out.
They are going to get back to me Friday and I will think about it.
I think it will be a good thing but....
They need to come to the party as well.
militias
Life should have "awesome points", just like Cards Against Humanity. You could maybe redeem them at malls, bars, movie theaters and nail salons.
Be awesome, everyone. The rewards might not actually be material, but awesomeness does have its way of getting back to you.
good god was yesterday's Doctor Who terrible.
That last asteroid that missed us should have hit us because humanity certainly deserves it.
I so need more hours in the day.
I like being able to play as a female character in Call of Duty: Black Ops 3. Normally, I want a big, strong, beared, manly man to play as, but now since I have accepted myself as a man, it's nice to switch it up. My character is particularly masculine, and I quite enjoy playing as a masculine woman. If she didn't look as masculine, then I probably would have went with a guy character. I'm making her a lesbian in my head. That will make the game more interesting for me. :D
Heatwave in Oz at the moment, so much longer will we have to wait before someone starts complaining?
Oh the joy of AC.... >:-)
Never argue with an idiot, because no-one will know the difference anyway
Still confused about work...
4 offers on table and a 5th of leaving. ???
Had a meeting today that did not really help with senior manager.
HK is on the table for a period if I want to.
Hate traveling and would be lost by myself.
The joys of working for a huge US bank.
Magic is real! I made a man disappear today; - I said the magic words 'transwoman' and he was gone just like that :laugh:
My wife found an old friend of ours on Facebook yesterday and friended him. I haven't seen him since 1998 nor heard from him since 2001. There's no way he knows what happened to his former housemate/bandmate/backstage pass friend.
This is going to be ten times as awesome as drinking Metallica's Heinekeg.
What am I thinking this should be fun, because this is the one place where people will understand. What am I think I am think why can't my brain decide what gender it wants to be a not just constantly switch between male and female (although the I have been in the female mind set for about 2 months now) I am thinking why can't me girlfriend understand that this is something I can't control instead of just not wanting to talk about it. I am thinking why can't society be more accepting of people like us, also why do we have to always fit into the gender norm I say break the gender norm, because who cares what other people think. I am also thinking I just wish it was easier to transition :(
Trying to think of something to make waking up to another day of this world seem worth while
Just wondering if I should listen to music or watch Gotham while my patient is not here yet! Last patient of the day, then, go buy drinks for a party!
Quote from: V M on December 03, 2015, 12:23:17 PM
Trying to think of something to make waking up to another day of this world seem worth while
Tell me about it (sigh), but we do though and we don't give up because we don't know the meaning of the word.
I wonder how "Tohru" is pronounced.
Quietly congratulating this small country on its Independence Day yet again. Only two years and Finland will turn 100 years old. :)
Quote from: King Malachite on December 04, 2015, 02:17:01 AM
I wonder how "Tohru" is pronounced.
The "oh" is like a long "o" sound. If that makes any sense. :D Can't really think of an example right now.
Quote from: Tossu-sama on December 06, 2015, 03:00:56 AM
Quietly congratulating this small country on its Independence Day yet again. Only two years and Finland will turn 100 years old. :)
The "oh" is like a long "o" sound. If that makes any sense. :D Can't really think of an example right now.
So is the "o" pronounced like in "Ohio" or is it "oo", like spelled in "too"? lol
Quote from: King Malachite on December 06, 2015, 10:04:50 AM
So is the "o" pronounced like in "Ohio" or is it "oo", like spelled in "too"? lol
It's not the typical English "oo" which makes it sound like a long "u" (don't know if my phonetics make any sense due to my native language). In a way it's more like the Ohio "o" but longer. Another way to write the "oh" is "ō". Same thing.
I'm thinking why am I so freaking bored all the time
Quote from: Skylar1992 on December 06, 2015, 05:10:57 PM
I'm thinking why am I so freaking bored all the time
Same here, I wish I had more people to talk to I feel so alone sometimes
I'm hoping the rain lightens up for a few hours long enough to get out of ton for my trip.
I'm wondering why we've had this persistent fog the last two days.
Quote from: Tossu-sama on December 06, 2015, 02:10:19 PM
It's not the typical English "oo" which makes it sound like a long "u" (don't know if my phonetics make any sense due to my native language). In a way it's more like the Ohio "o" but longer. Another way to write the "oh" is "ō". Same thing.
Lol that helped some. For some reason, I want to pronounce it "Tor-ru".
Weird weather, rain and snow coming down at the same time
I was just pondering the song "Good King Wenceslas". If he was such a good king, then why did they have to eat poor Stephen instead of having a proper feast? And then the king is looking down on it, as if it's totally beneath him. If anything, Wenceslas is kinda looking like a major dick here for getting all smug because his people have resorted to cannibalism.
Just sayin'...
When I was a kid I thought the line was, "good King Wenceslas stepped out on the feet of Steven."
Three years on T today. :)
I wondering why there is still no snow home. My snowboard is ready !!! I want to use it!
I realize that I have the "donator" badge, but I haven't given anything. Someone donated in my place, but that was over a year ago. Either someone did it again, or maybe there is some type of glitch. If it is the first one, thank you, whoever you are. It really touches me that you would do that for me, especially since I have been more or less "inactive" here. If it is the second one.....well.... o.0 I don't know what to say about that, lol.
I re read something I wrote. Why is it that I can't get the thoughts in my head, no matter how well rehearsed, to go on paper and say the same thing?
Quote from: LordKAT on December 15, 2015, 05:45:53 AM
I re read something I wrote. Why is it that I can't get the thoughts in my head, no matter how well rehearsed, to go on paper and say the same thing?
I have a similar problem, Do you visualise your thoughts because I do, it could be playing over and over in my head right there in front of me but what comes of it is a mangled mess of incoherent gibberish, fraught with spelling errors and terrible misplaced/non-existent punctuation. I'm forever writing and rewriting.
Pretty much. I went to a study help group in college that was supposedly there to help people with similar troubles. When I said outloud what I wanted it to say, she said just write what I said. Problem is, that never works.
I have difficulty writing also, I often use the computer to work through my mistakes and then copy it onto paper
It usually still takes a few tries to get it right which is kinda time consuming so I usually end up deciding on how many mistakes are allowable
I miss Road to Trista....
After the fifth day of 43C+ I'm thinking that climate change has settled on Adelaide.
I would gladly take that and give you the 1C we have. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: Cindy on December 19, 2015, 12:43:12 AM
After the fifth day of 43C+ I'm thinking that climate change has settled on Adelaide.
Quote from: Mariah2014 on December 19, 2015, 01:27:30 AM
I would gladly take that and give you the 1C we have. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: Cindy on December 19, 2015, 12:43:12 AM
After the fifth day of 43C+ I'm thinking that climate change has settled on Adelaide.
Throw me a snowball!
A bit hard to do since freezing rain is on top of all the snow we did get. Hugs
Mariah
Quote from: Cindy on December 19, 2015, 01:28:27 AM
Throw me a snowball!
It was 44C today when I went out west.
Cindy does not have the monopoly on heat.
Nice where I am on the coast as there is a pleasant cool breeze now with an ice cream. :)
Tomorrow will be hotter so a movie day to see star wars.
It's cooling down tomorrow in Cindy land so there might even be snow.
Running away!
Quote from: Jenny07 on December 19, 2015, 01:38:24 AM
It was 44C today when I went out west.
Cindy does not have the monopoly on heat.
Nice where I am on the coast as there is a pleasant cool breeze now with an ice cream. :)
Tomorrow will be hotter so a movie day to see star wars.
It's cooling down tomorrow in Cindy land so there might even be snow.
Running away!
May the Farce be with you!
It will be, it will be.
Quote from: Jenny07 on December 19, 2015, 01:56:25 AM
It will be, it will be.
You must be the only girl I know with laser guns mounted on her bike to fight off stormtroopers :laugh:
You can be my wingmangirl anytime ;)
Quote from: Jenny07 on December 19, 2015, 02:04:11 AM
You can be my wingmangirl anytime ;)
As long as I'm not R2D2 looking at your fat ass :laugh:
Oh the cheek. :o
That's why we love lycra...
Quote from: V M on December 17, 2015, 05:34:38 AM
I have difficulty writing also, I often use the computer to work through my mistakes and then copy it onto paper
It usually still takes a few tries to get it right which is kinda time consuming so I usually end up deciding on how many mistakes are allowable
This idea might actually work. Thanks for the idea.
Quote from: LordKAT on December 20, 2015, 07:15:03 AM
This idea might actually work. Thanks for the idea.
Glad I could help, using the computer has actually helped quite a bit to improve my writing skills
I'm going to start revving up my vitamin c and immune-boosting stuff in my system. I have to deal with these coughing kids at my job.
I'm thinking my spatial analytical ability has declined markedly since golf romeo sierra....or maybe it's just age.
Think I'm in need of quite a few bras and knickers.
They be big.
Quote from: Jenny07 on December 20, 2015, 10:41:19 PM
Think I'm in need of quite a few bras and knickers.
They be big.
Told you that you have a fat ass :-*
Maybe a trip to the shops is in order in January?
Indeed ;)
I'm at 189 & my next goal is 180. After a year on the Atkins way of eating I'm finally losing some weight. My goal is 160 perhaps by next year. I'm 5' 9" & 160 would be about as thin as I can become. I'm sure learning how to cook better low carb recipes. Happy dance.
I'm thinking that, perhaps, the next steps in my transition should be learning sign language and pretending to be mute and converting to Islam so that I can wear a veil, maybe a burqa. :(
Wondering if mom will notice my pitiful stache and chin hair today. |D
Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?
Im Thinking that I am the only Sci Fi geek who has not seen the new Battlestar Gallactica. So I am binge watching Season one and drinking wine. Because thats what I do on Christmas Eve. ;)
Quote from: Jill F on December 24, 2015, 06:16:57 PM
Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?
Truly, I wish I knew the answer to that one as well
Quote from: Jenniferinutah on December 24, 2015, 06:24:57 PM
Im Thinking that I am the only Sci Fi geek who has not seen the new Battlestar Gallactica. So I am binge watching Season one and drinking wine. Because thats what I do on Christmas Eve. ;)
There's a new Battlestar Galactica! :o :o :o
Why does the one eyed Grinch hate Xmas so much?
Drinking 1% milk seems so elitist.
Who reads the numbers? I buy milk by the color. Blue usually. Red if I'm hungry, purple if just for cooking, Green when I'm just plain broke.
I think I must have been on Santa's naughty list this year :-\
Nah, he just could not keep the KAT out of the way, or find the tape and scissors.
Now if only KAT's were allowed in the post office.
It's difficult to think properly when your mind is constantly cloudy. I might go watch some more Tony Hart.
Ham and cheese on bagel chips is delicious. I don't care about the irony.
Quote from: Jill F on December 28, 2015, 05:29:00 PM
Ham and cheese on bagel chips is delicious. I don't care about the irony.
>:-)
Quote from: Jill F on December 28, 2015, 05:29:00 PM
Ham and cheese on bagel chips is delicious. I don't care about the irony.
I made a bacon and egg breakfast bagel sandwich the other day, and I didn't do any ironing either ;D
I will find out shortly if my work wants to make me decide to stay or if I need to start looking.
Got a nice message from my de facto boss yesterday which was unexpected.
Not really as he is inspirational and the best boss I have worked with.
I can only hope they come to the party.
I have informed them so it is in their court.
All I can do is wait.
Well then. The temperatures have plummeted down to -30 celsius (which is apparently -22 F?). Cold as balls. I don't really mind it because I know to put on enough clothes but then I end up sweating like a pig when I'm indoors, ugh.
Sick of rain. Its been a warm but very wet winter. When will it end.
Well we've been having a cold, wet and grey Summer so something tells me that humankind has finally managed to break the weather beyond repair.
Someone keeps sneaking in and drinking my tea when I'm not looking.
*hides tea cup*
cold all week here. I hate the cold.
Anyone have any hot tea?
I don't feel like going to work, but I have to. Video games are not going to pay for themselves.
Dang it's true!!! Some people actually are born without a personality
I should quit foruming and get on with my essay...
I'm pretty sure I have pedanticitis, or a severe allergy at best. :laugh:
It always bugs me when someone begins a sentence with "I don't think" because usually as I listen further I start thinking "What a drone, I wish some people wouldn't overstate the obvious quite so often"
Then there's the folks I think should just go apply at Disney for a position in 'Fantasyland', but that's another subject
Glad the weekend's over, as previously stated above some of my neighbors really bug me out
The walls are thin where I live so I can hear them from inside my apt. talking smack and making fun of me on the hallway, then they wonder why I'm not all too thrilled to see them later the next day in the lobby ::)
Arrrgh!!! Freakin' neighbors sometimes :P
John Oliver totally rules!
My paycheck seems to be going fast *sigh*
*goes back on Ebay*
I really need a wardrobe upgrade.
Neighbors should actually be spelled neighbores because they are usually boring as hell and almost always griping about someone or something
The next chicken that comes to my door going 'bock bock bock' is getting fried. Stay away from my door, ya chickens!
i want something to eat
and a girl is bothering me (in a good way)
that sounds weird
I think it's time for me to buy another Mr. Limpy. I don't think the movers would have retrieved mine from our old house.
I think the cultural definition of perfection is ludicrous, as beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Still, I fall victim to such an ideal because I sometimes feel ugly and unloved for not being able to reach it.
Who let the dogs out?
Armadillo. It's like a lobster. Except that you can run over it and eat it.
Quote from: V M on March 08, 2016, 01:27:08 AM
Who let the dogs out?
Who, Who, Who!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.radiotimes.com%2Fnamedimage%2FDoctor_Who_50th_anniversary_prequel_The_Night_of_the_Doctor_to_screen_via_BBC_Red_Button.jpg%3Fquality%3D85%26amp%3Bmode%3Dcrop%26amp%3Bwidth%3D620%26amp%3Bheight%3D374%26amp%3B404%3Dtv%26amp%3Burl%3D%2Fuploads%2Fimages%2Foriginal%2F41170.jpg&hash=7d9b8c709617711da3c0b167049ac6e138e54cc4)
Sent from my SHIELD Tablet using Tapatalk
LOL... A bunch of my neighbors have some type of little yippy dog, when they all get together it sounds like a horse race on the hallway
I wonder where my Thor Hammer keychain went. I actually felt pretty manly holding that in my hand.
I wish youtube wasnt blocked in my work...
Sleep time I suppose
sometimes i'm not sure whether i just act childishly crazy or whether i am.
same goes for my over-the-top joke-flirting (not actually gay) social personality.
then again, in the case of the latter, it might be a bit of a case of social chameleonism.
Shame on Sony for abandoning the PS Vita. As much as I like the concept of the VR, I like my PS Vita even more, and to kill it off so soon makes me so disappointed.
Is it wrong for me to cook up big messy dinner in celebration of getting a high rated score on my apt. inspection? ;D
thinking about how weird it would be if humans were marsupials.
Supposedly it's the first day of spring but it still feels like winter here and I am sooooo tired of this darned cold/flu thing :P
Saddened by recent changes in my marriage. Heartened by the likelihood that there are changes still to come and they could well be for the better.
I'm sleepy
WHY IS IT SO COLD TONIGHT??!! I THOUGHT THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SPRING??!!!!
Work in a few hours.....I need to sleep.
Thinking of my programming career
I'm thinking that I sure wish all my surgeries were completed. There are some nice very well endowed men on 7 or better chasing me. I'd sure love for them to catch me. I'd so love some good hot sex with a new hunk man.
Quote from: FrancisAnn on March 26, 2016, 05:48:02 AM
I'm thinking that I sure wish all my surgeries were completed. There are some nice very well endowed men on 7 or better chasing me. I'd sure love for them to catch me. I'd so love some good hot sex with a new hunk man.
And don't we all!
Love, Sarina!
Quote from: Laura_Squirrel on March 26, 2016, 11:40:20 AM
:icon_blah: No.
Sorry! Excuse my error! I mean to those of the following sexual orientation: Bisexual, Gay, Heterosexual (Women).
:-\ And again, sorry if I insulted you in someway!
Love, Sarina!
If some people pulled their heads out they might gain a better view
Another sore throat and ear ache, why?
Quote from: SanaRinomi on March 26, 2016, 05:55:47 AM
And don't we all!
Love, Sarina!
Sarina, Good for you girl friend. It's so nice to find another hetrosexual woman!!! Maybe we can be friends if you want? You know some girl talk.....nails, cooking, men, sex.... Love, Francis. This new man courting me is very nice, like 30 years old, some engineer, single, 5' 10", moving to my state soon & does not know many people. And oh my he's very well endowed as he says, like 8-9 inches & thick. I hope to met him & see his beautiful large penis then maybe I can make him very happy you know. We have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince you know but this man seems very nice to me, I'm excited....for some new romance.
I accidentally walked in on one of of our house visitors while she was using the bathroom. She was a young lady, maybe a teenager, and she apparently didn't lock the door. Regardless, the whole ordeal made me feel very dirty and horrible, like I violated her. Visitors should really lock the door if they are in the bathroom.
Thinking about my next workout tomorrow. :) and about how I'm going to get enough money for my surgery, and a million other things, normal things. :)
Quote from: SanaRinomi on March 26, 2016, 11:47:14 AM
Sorry! Excuse my error! I mean to those of the following sexual orientation: Bisexual, Gay, Heterosexual (Women).
:-\ And again, sorry if I insulted you in someway!
Nah. I wasn't insulted. I just don't like dudes. I like chicks. But, to each their own. (Unless you like Marshmallow Peeps. Then, you're just gross.)
Quote from: FrancisAnn on March 27, 2016, 04:52:29 AM
Sarina, Good for you girl friend. It's so nice to find another hetrosexual woman!!! Maybe we can be friends if you want? You know some girl talk.....nails, cooking, men, sex.... Love, Francis. This new man courting me is very nice, like 30 years old, some engineer, single, 5' 10", moving to my state soon & does not know many people. And oh my he's very well endowed as he says, like 8-9 inches & thick. I hope to met him & see his beautiful large penis then maybe I can make him very happy you know. We have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince you know but this man seems very nice to me, I'm excited....for some new romance.
I'm rooting for you!
Love, Sarina!
I'm thinking how nice it will be to have my GRS & hopefully a normal depth vagina. A new nice very well endowed man is courting me. He is huge & how nice it would feel to enjoy him completely inside me. He's younger than me & I know he could really give it to me but good....Oh me I sure enjoy the feel of a hard man....It's so nice to be a woman & it always has, love strong aggressive horny men.
I voted early today in the primary election.
Meh...
I'm trying to figure out how I am going to pay for electrolysis. The beginning, I know, but damn...
A chicken ain't nothin' but a bird.
Today I have an interview for a position in my own field where I can pretty much limit my hours by taking as many or as few clients as I choose. It pays twice what I make at Walmart and I can keep the Walmart job while I settle in to it. They seem genuinely happy at the thought of having me. On the other hand, I have to out myself right at the start due to the documentation they want. Also, I intend to dress my best for this interview and Sweetie stayed home sick so I have to do all my preparations in front of her to look really business fem which I've never done before. Good thoughts, even silent ones, greatly appreciated! I'm really nervous about the day.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on April 26, 2016, 06:51:07 AM
Today I have an interview for a position in my own field where I can pretty much limit my hours by taking as many or as few clients as I choose. It pays twice what I make at Walmart and I can keep the Walmart job while I settle in to it. They seem genuinely happy at the thought of having me. On the other hand, I have to out myself right at the start due to the documentation they want. Also, I intend to dress my best for this interview and Sweetie stayed home sick so I have to do all my preparations in front of her to look really business fem which I've never done before. Good thoughts, even silent ones, greatly appreciated! I'm really nervous about the day.
Go for it!
Looking on Craigslist for a second job. Trying to figure out what exactly I want to do for some extra money. Which is going to go to my savings fund (eventually moving out of where I am) and paying off my student loans. Also waiting to see what is going on with the cable guys.
Quote from: SarahMarie1987 on April 27, 2016, 11:36:42 AM
Looking on Craigslist for a second job. Trying to figure out what exactly I want to do for some extra money. Which is going to go to my savings fund (eventually moving out of where I am) and paying off my student loans. Also waiting to see what is going on with the cable guys.
Good luck with that!
Thank you, Sana! The interview went well and I,'m waiting to hear.
i'm tired
and in more than one way
maybe i'm in a melancholy mood, i don't know.
same reason i ACT over-the-top in front of people.
makes me feel more like i am present.
i don't know. sometimes i just feel like i never came back
from some things and years, like i died mentally and like i'm just an empty shell,
some days i am there. i don't know. i should stop writing about my unrelated problems HERE and write in an appropriate self-help forum.
If I ever get married, I'm going to be a jealous husband, and proud of that! :D
Life is good and so much fun :)
Quote from: Jerrica on April 28, 2016, 03:40:10 AM
Life is good and so much fun :)
May I say every GM and their Admin takes joy in a happy post!
I went to the local bi-weekly transgender support group for the first time last night. Nice people, but I probably won't go back again. I feel like I over-shared and there was nothing there for me that isn't here.
I've always felt that everything is alive somehow, even inanimate objects, because they are still composed of atoms; so yeah, our planet is a living being, and we are her guardians, so we all need to do what we can to take care of her. ❤️
I'm really tired and should probably crawl back into bed :)
Monkeys who are full of too many fermented bananas run the risk of becoming very ape
Quote from: Dee Marshall on April 27, 2016, 04:03:01 PM
Thank you, Sana! The interview went well and I,'m waiting to hear.
May I ask. What is your field of expertise?
I work with the mentally I'll when I'm doing what I trained. Psychiatric Rehabilitation. I help people deal with getting back into the real world after the medical people have them properly medicated so that they can cope. This job will be with people with traumatic brain injury which can have similar effects.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on May 06, 2016, 10:39:36 AM
I work with the mentally I'll when I'm doing what I trained. Psychiatric Rehabilitation. I help people deal with getting back into the real world after the medical people have them properly medicated so that they can cope. This job will be with people with traumatic brain injury which can have similar effects.
Good! Great to see someone who cares!
Love, Sarina!
How bureaucrazy some bureaucracies can be.
One of my super companies has been sending me mail as Mr.Abc. Recived a call today from them today."We have your name change paperwork mam, but we need you to send us your marriage certificate so we can process this". Who did I get married to myself!, and when???? :eusa_wall:
Quote from: immortal gypsy on May 10, 2016, 02:23:21 AM
How bureaucrazy some bureaucracies can be.
One of my super companies has been sending me mail as Mr.Abc. Recived a call today from them today."We have your name change paperwork mam, but we need you to send us your marriage certificate so we can process this". Who did I get married to myself!, and when???? :eusa_wall:
No, you got married to Mr.Abc. As soon as you started receiving emails from them!
Love, Sarina!
I'm thinking of starting to move forward with my Name Change this Fall. Oh boy!
Thinking of getting a new seat. I just spent the last 3 hours recording and my butt really hurts.
Love, Sarina!
glug, glug,glug, glug glug... :icon_drunk:
thinking my nipples hurt (but loving why)
Quote from: Marlee on May 15, 2016, 07:56:38 PM
thinking my nipples hurt (but loving why)
The sweetest pain we'll ever know, given that pregnancy is beyond us.
Grindcore is very terrifying and when I think of true punk rock bands, I think of Nirvana and The Melvins.
My fringe grew by an inch only this last week!
Love, Sarina!
I'm starving! :'(
One of my dearest friends :icon_cry2: :icon_cry2: :icon_cry2:
Quote from: V M on February 21, 2015, 04:01:40 PM
I think it's time to get those thinking caps on and... GO!!! 8)
Hugs
I'm thinking about my future and what i'm wanting to do it isn't anything i can speak about
i feel really stuck in time at the moment. There isn't anything to do but wait everything out and hope for the best
i'm sure everything will be fine but yea. I'm thinking about getting testosterone like i normally do, but one big thing is iv'e been thinking about top surgery and thinking about how i'm going to save up for it and what i'll do.
:) so yea, that's all iv'e been thinking about besides hanging out with my best friend some more and getting outside more often nothing much, But everything's been good lately.
How...HOW are bread pants not a thing?
I need to pee, but I don't feel like getting up.
Saw my own ticker here and realized it's been two years since my hysto. Where does time go??
Is it better to make fish tacos on "Fish Friday" or "Taco Tuesday"? :D
The best thing about fish tacos is that you can have them on fish Friday AND taco Tuesday.
I need to get my life together.
Job A (Walmart) is after me to switch to overnights. I've done it other places and it comes with an increase in pay. The real question is, how will it affect job B and when will I sleep. Must think about this!
Dee Marshall, good luck with that!
Love, Sarina!
Quote from: SanaRinomi on June 06, 2016, 11:54:07 PM
Dee Marshall, good luck with that!
Love, Sarina!
Thank you! I thought about it and decided a that after taxes the slight increase wasn't worth the disruption of my sleep cycle. The problem with overnights is that being asleep when most people are awake generally leads to a poor days sleep and spiro makes that bad enough as it is.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on June 07, 2016, 06:57:55 AM
Thank you! I thought about it and decided a that after taxes the slight increase wasn't worth the disruption of my sleep cycle. The problem with overnights is that being asleep when most people are awake generally leads to a poor days sleep and spiro makes that bad enough as it is.
No need to thank me, thank yourself.
Love, Sarina!
Why I always get in such bad Heroes groups when my friend isnt online? R.I.P Playing a support in MOBAs with no friends. :-\
Quote from: Matti on June 07, 2016, 01:13:34 PM
Why I always get in such bad Heroes groups when my friend isnt online? R.I.P Playing a support in MOBAs with no friends. :-\
Sorry, but you are very unlucky.
Love, Sarina!
Thinking of how annoying it is when you are waiting on hold to get a new primary care provider that you know goes by "Informed Consent" for hormone therapy and you wanna get this ball rolling! still waiting.....its seriously been 8 minutes.
Quote from: SanaRinomi on June 07, 2016, 01:16:53 PM
Sorry, but you are very unlucky.
Love, Sarina!
Highly possible! But gotta love gaming anyway!
(Any Blizzard gamers out there? Hit me up! Shinozuka#21902 on EU)
I'm sleepy..
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Quote from: Matti on June 07, 2016, 01:35:21 PM
Highly possible! But gotta love gaming anyway!
(Any Blizzard gamers out there? Hit me up! Shinozuka#21902 on EU)
Well, I'm thinking of buying overwatch so yeah.
Love, Sarina!
sleepy
Need voice training...
Love, Sarina!
What I could do so people will like me and I actually make a friend so I stop hanging only on my partner....
I was on an astronomy forum today, and someone was discussing preparing his telescope for travel. The title of the thread was "Packing". My initial reaction was, "Whoa, he's talking about that, here??"
So I'm thinking how my vocabulary has shifted since I started coming here. :)
Final examination today... Let's see if I graduate.
Doing a stream and recording it although my Webcam and mic Are broken. Huray for determination!
Love, Sarina!
I'm not running for President am I?
Why am I so tired today...
Love, Sarina!
Just read the worst description of a job:
"that's what having a job is, I know: doing something you don't want"
Sure thing but do tell why I actually like my job?
Quote from: Tossu-sama on June 23, 2016, 04:36:31 PM
Just read the worst description of a job:
"that's what having a job is, I know: doing something you don't want"
Sure thing but do tell why I actually like my job?
Because you're a lucky person? And probably studied slot to get to that point?
Love, Sarina!
Quote from: SanaRinomi on June 24, 2016, 12:10:20 AM
Because you're a lucky person? And probably studied slot to get to that point?
Love, Sarina!
I don't know about studying a lot. I started the education that lead me to the job last fall and graduated like a week ago. I just did my practical training in the same place so I just pretty much continued there afterwards with a paycheck.
I'm both excited and incredibly nervous to be moving to a new place soon.
Ugh, some most of my neighbors at my apt.s are so invasive :P A bit of curiosity I can understand but some take it to the level of being 'Space Invaders'
Why on earth did I decide to do 45Km bike riding contest cross-country in a desert.
Love, Sarina!
If the local news channel says "All that and all that matters" one more time I'll either throw up or defecate on the floor
I changed the channel to another news program
Thinking that was a lot of garlic!
Who wants a kiss? :-* :laugh:
Thinking of what to do for Canada Day today. It's gonna be so busy everywhere.
If some folks "pulled the stick out" they just might feel like dancing :eusa_dance:
Quote from: V M on July 02, 2016, 06:21:30 PM
If some folks "pulled the stick out" they just might feel like dancing :eusa_dance:
So true!
I think today feels like a wonderful day to be alive. I think I'll have a little dance as I get this rather sore body into action :eusa_dance: :eusa_dance:
I'm thinking about how many new things are bothering me but how many things are also getting better at the same time today is balanced with good and bad, i don't mind that though better then complete bad. :)
There's far too much blood in my alcohol system.
Probably should have killed myself years ago while I was still in San Diego
All throughout history the whole world has been full of people who are out to prove a whole lot of nothin' much by behaving like aggressive little yippy dogs who constantly seek praise and attention and bark about a whole lot of nothin' much in order to prove a whole lot of nothin' much more than last little yippy dog that came along
On a scale of 1-10, how "choice" my words will be if my neighbour decides to play music at 23:00 again and wake my daughter up. So far I'm on 13/10.
im thinking about my upcoming surgery... though it's 3 months away and my bloodwork isnt even done yet or my ekg... im just very excited... im able to sleep at night but im on this site before i go to bed and right after i wake up... reading ppls comment and just doing my research... is that crazy or what?
Pet me, Bob Dole.
What's on my MRI?
Thinking about how it seems as if I will never be accepted by anyone in this entire lifetime.
Thinking I really better getting moving on if I'm going to get what I need to done this morning. Hugs
Mariah
Got a job interview tues :)
Money...
Love, Sarina!
getting the blood work required on tuesday july 19th for my srs... pray for me that i pass these blood work required... srs in october 12 2016 with Dr Brassard in Montreal Canada
Narcolepsy sucks and most people don't really have much of an understanding about it
Quote from: V M on July 18, 2016, 09:48:29 AM
Narcolepsy sucks and most people don't really have much of an understanding about it
is that when you just fall as sleep out of nowhere?
Quote from: jujubes1986 on July 18, 2016, 07:52:04 PM
is that when you just fall as sleep out of nowhere?
Sort of, but it is on spectrum that isn't often completely depicted properly
It has been researched to some degree but most people including doctors don't really understand the condition
Here is the Wikipedia (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcolepsy) discription
Worried about a certain individual... Actually, I'm worried about everyone that's driven to suicide from gender dysphoria, transphobia, being shunned, pretty much all the stigmas and factors that go with being trans. I've found myself having suicidal thoughts creep back into my life, but I'm gonna keep trying to fight it. It's been slowly getting worse since coming to terms with being trans.
Will the Southern Poverty Law Center declare the GOP a hate group?
Maybe I won't become another statistic. Maybe there is hope for me after all. Maybe there's hope for all of us...
I've never had much of a family and just about everyone I know has turned out to just be another let down full of empty promises
You all have nice lives, I don't really care if I wake up to another day of this stinkin' world anymore
Hotline, sweetie. We need you around! :)
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: V M on July 21, 2016, 05:37:28 AM
I've never had much of a family and just about everyone I know has turned out to just be another let down full of empty promises
You all have nice lives, I don't really care if I wake up to another day of this stinkin' world anymore
I'm thinking that I care a Hell of a lot that you are here tomorrow and for everyday to come. Stand strong Sis, we walk together.
So, I finally got rid of my Facebook profile. One more piece of my old identity, gone like tears in the rain.
Good riddance.
More like over thinking?
I had a terrible dream the other night where I came out to my family.
The same family that adores Trump, thinks LGBTQA people are monsters and freaks, and wants to deport Muslims. Etc Etc
So it went well as much as I am fearing it would.
Doing my best not to think about it. Since it is only a dream. Trying to think about how my friends (my chosen family really) love and support me.
Also how warm and accepting these boards are. Even if I haven't been on here in a while, sorry about that.
Thinking about how wrong I was in my last post on this thread. I'm weak, pathetic, useless, stupid, nobody's going to accept me. I probably will become another statistic and end it all. And even through death, people will STILL misgender me. They'll STILL claim that I'm something I'm not. They will never accept me and I think all this struggle is pointless now... I love my kids, but they need someone good in their life who is smart, strong, capable, useful to society, someone who can teach them to reach their fullest potential...
im thinking about my up coming surgery... it's consuming my mind... as of now it's 2 months 1 week and 6 days :)
There are just some things you can't un see.
Sent from my Mariah's iPhone using Tapatalk
Quote from: Mariah on August 02, 2016, 11:19:47 AM
There are just some things you can't un see.
I'm thinking I'm glad I'm not moderating message boards any more... :icon_eek:
You sure that you don't want the job, We are um looking for a few good volunteers. ;)
Quote from: Michelle_P on August 02, 2016, 02:57:22 PM
I'm thinking I'm glad I'm not moderating message boards any more... :icon_eek:
Leading on from the "happy" thread:
My partner, who I'm head over feet in love with has flipped my mind into suspicion and "what the hell do you want?" mode. By being nice. That's it.
Atom needs to play better with others and trust more. She is also quite difficult to live with. #Resolution2017
Wishing I had something to feel happy about :-\
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dojkhR53oAs
Dot Warner (aka Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fanna Bo Besca III) totally rules!
That is all.
Cognitive Dissonance
im thinking that in 57 days ill be in montreal in dr brassard's hands getting my srs :)
I'm thinking that I've been incredibly lucky in finding this forum, at this time in my life. While getting started on this path has done me a lot of good physically; opening up a little in a group setting that I can survive contact with, has opened huge pathways to the future for me.
there will be a kind, gentle, compassionate rw, in no small part because of susans.org
thank you.
Started reading Out of the Past by Neil Miller- highly recommend it.
Quote from: rwOnnaDesuKa on August 15, 2016, 07:15:26 AM
I'm thinking that I've been incredibly lucky in finding this forum, at this time in my life. While getting started on this path has done me a lot of good physically; opening up a little in a group setting that I can survive contact with, has opened huge pathways to the future for me.
there will be a kind, gentle, compassionate rw, in no small part because of susans.org
thank you.
That's how I feel about this site. Yesterday was possibly the most dysphoric day I've had yet. I attended a wedding and because my partner was part of the wedding party, I got pressured into wearing a dress and make up. I've come out to my partner many times since December of last year but he really didn't understand how much of a guy I really am until at 2 in the morning where I explained to him how painful it is to have manhood denied since birth. If it weren't for this website I wouldn't have been able to cope as well and find the courage to explain my identity as best as I could. Knowing that I wasn't alone in this helped tremendously.
Is it just me, or did the style of the forums change a bit????
Some of my neighbors where I live are such jerks :P
I've been thinking if I don't get an apology from my Transphobic parents this week could be the last time I speak to them for quite some time...maybe ever...and that makes me more than a little sad...
Thinking now much better i sleep since realising myself
I'm thinking my bank knows how much of a slob I was, I bought a shirt at a nice department store and tripped every one of their fraud warning services. Its a well designed system so it didn't cause any inconvenience; but dang, that was harsh.
Back in perth on r&r for a week thinking i know who to contact now .....no excuses ....thinking do i have the courage
Quote from: ElizabethK on August 22, 2016, 07:08:35 AM
I've been thinking if I don't get an apology from my Transphobic parents this week could be the last time I speak to them for quite some time...maybe ever...and that makes me more than a little sad...
Right, but they're making you sad already, and you really don't need that from them for trying to live your life.
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on August 23, 2016, 10:59:30 AM
Right, but they're making you sad already, and you really don't need that from them for trying to live your life.
Hugs, Devlyn
Hi Devlyn
I know you are right but it is still a bitter pill to swallow. Thankyou for your support...every little bit helps.
Hugs
Liz
My manager is moving to New York to take up a very senior role at global HQ.
Yesterday he told me he has a new task which will require an expert at what I do. As I am the expert then looks like I might be packing my bags and moving there as well. Why would he tell me if not. He is a inspirational manager, the best I and anyone at the company has worked for. It will be cut throat so he will need his own team to succeed.
How is New York? No idea can't be bigger or better than Sydney? We have had the Olympics and Bondi Beach ;)
I wont be good at fitting in and will refuse to spell colour the American way and they just don't get cricket. Probably get run over as they all drive on the wrong side of the road anyway.
I will have to wait and see what happens but could be an exiting time if he needs us there which he will. He would also take his BA as well as she is brilliant.
New York is nice if you like living in big cities. Your spelling problem won't be an issue and Americans love Australians. Lots to do. Beaches right near there are not so hot, but lots of culture.
the shore seems far
For me, every time I visit here, I am dismayed at the level of use but not the same in donation or subscription.
We all get something from being here so why wait until you're asked to contribute.
If you can please do as we need Susan's.
Cheers Sue.
Seconded ...
I was going to wait another day or two to add something extra to the kitty; its not something I'll be able to do each month beyond the subscription, but I have gotten much more value from this site this month than the one month subscription fee.
And on the thinking note... I spent two hours last night, shopping online for clothes without buying anything, just looking at different girl outfits and presentations that are right for me. I actually cared about whether colors and patterns would match and how the garment would sit on my frame now, vs further along the road.
A thought occurs to me this morning though; that if my wife figures out I like shopping for clothes now, our bank accounts are toast.
Release the hounds! Good luck with the "Why can't I spend money, you do" meme.
Funny little thoughts concerning this year's Presidential election which for some reason features Porky VS Petunia who is married to Elmer Fudd and includes a variety of the Bugs Bunny Looney Tunes characters
For most of my life I suspected that I'm gay (so did a lot of other people, my mother included, I believe), but I actively dislike much of male behavior and can't imagine myself in a relationship with one. Now that I know that I'm a woman, not a man, it all makes perfect sense!
3 days to r&r and my first hrt doctors appointment.. cant wait but I'm nervous...bored thrashing around in a dump truck around and around. ...meh!
I'm a little anxious. Today I dressed more fem than I typically do. I got great reactions and basically felt really good about myself. I ran some errands ending up at the grocery. It was then that I got an email from Randi asking me to bring her some lunch. She hadn't brought any and had developed a headache. She's never seen me in a skirt and here I was in a black midi skirt with pink flowers, a pink camisole, my brown boots and a black velvet track jacket. Yes I looked good and WAS turning heads.
I walked into her office with her lunch. She asked me about the skirt and laughed a bit about it having a slit to mid thigh.
Now I'm home waiting for the other shoe to drop. She's really good at hiding her emotions and wouldn't make a scene at work. The question is, will she make a scene when she gets home?
I am often accused of not thinking, or thinking too much. That was Don. Dawn is not like that. I think but don't get wrapped around it for days on end.
Hi, Dee! ;)
After reading that, I'm thinking that if I ever ran into my wife while I'm properly dressed, she'd be really, really annoyed.
I totally look better than she does. >:-)
I'm thinking about all those feminising subliminals videos on youtube. Do they really work? Even if to some extent that would be awesome!
Quote from: Michelle_P on October 06, 2016, 07:01:43 PM
Hi, Dee! ;)
After reading that, I'm thinking that if I ever ran into my wife while I'm properly dressed, she'd be really, really annoyed.
I totally look better than she does. >:-)
Strangely enough ....was thinking the same about a girl friend coworker ...... she said just out of the blue .....dont become a woman you'd make an ugly woman .....it wasn't malicious she just blurted it out this is months before i even knew about myself .....at the time i thought
What a strange thing to say ? And sure i would at this time ...but i have plans :)
But today i was thinking about it ....and i thought .....right we'll see about that !
I,m looking forward to bumping into ber one day in the future up in the dersert ...... she wont recognize me ..... so im going to stir up with some lesbian antics .....before i introduce :)
You don't want to know what I'm thinking, my mind is a strange and twisted world not meant for mortal eyes. Even I, it's overseer have many mysteries in that world which elude me.
Should I order Birthday Cake Oreos or should I order Double Chocolate Oreoes.........
Gym tomorrow, or not?
What's the ultimate reason for all life and the universe? :D
Thinking how lucky to be working with such great people and a progressive company
How am I going to lead my golf club out of financial collapse while ensuring my business thrives, convincing my wife that I am who I have always been and having enough time to dress (makeup incl) as the person I really am.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Poke, poke, poke. Did it get squishier? But, it's only been half a day. I must be overthinking this.
What am I going to wear to my therapist appointment today?
Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk
Quote from: TonyaW on October 20, 2016, 07:42:59 AM
What am I going to wear to my therapist appointment today?
Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk
I will give you the same advice I was given when I asked the same question "Wear whatever you are comfortable wearing and if the therapist has an issue...run ;D"
Good Luck and I hope it goes well
Liz
Conversation with my Dr yesterday
Dr: so when are you going to transition
Me: I am already in the process I have been on HRT for 5 months
Dr: what about your clothes
Next sound is that of an ak47 :icon_2gun: on full automatic as Liz goes postal on another transphobic dimwit in the Dr's office :icon_bat:
Quote from: ElizabethK on October 20, 2016, 07:58:15 AM
I will give you the same advice I was given when I asked the same question "Wear whatever you are comfortable wearing and if the therapist has an issue...run ;D"
Good Luck and I hope it goes well
Liz
It's more that I have to be at work an hour after so not sure if I want to go home and change after or dress for work.
Not out at work but have been wearing some tops that could get noticed as women's. Therapist has been very encouraging about what I've worn so far.
Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk
Quote from: TonyaW on October 20, 2016, 08:14:05 AM
It's more that I have to be at work an hour after so not sure if I want to go home and change after or dress for work.
Not out at work but have been wearing some tops that could get noticed as women's. Therapist has been very encouraging about what I've worn so far.
Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk
How Brave you feeling...I have ben seeing my therapist for ab out a year and have always gone in Drab...last session I put some makeup on(just a little ) and was wearing a fairly fem outfit and she was delighted...I was relaxed and happy (which came across with no effort). This all gives you confidence for those days when it may not be quite so easy...If your opportunities are limited then maybe take this opportunity that is offered to present yourself in a safe environment as you like.
Hugs
Liz
So many cute clothes for sale, but I'm too disgustingly ugly and old.
So many cute clothes for sale, but I'm too disgustingly ugly and old.
So many cute clothes for sale, but I'm too disgustingly ugly and old.
So many cute clothes for sale, but I'm too disgustingly ugly and old.
So many cute clothes for sale, but I'm too disgustingly ugly and old.
Aaaaaaaaa!!!
That's what I'm thinking ^^
I'm about to turn 63 and start my Real Life Experience/Test. So, at the end of one year...
When I get older, losing my hair, many years from now
Will you still be sending me a valentine, birthday greetings, bottle of wine?
If I'd been out 'til quarter to three, would you lock the door?
Will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I'm sixty-four?
The energy in this place. It's as... overwhelming as it ever was.
So much emotion swirling around. It's almost like a tangible force. :-\ Black and red and white and gold, like a rapidly spinning sphere.
Sorry. Ignore me. I'm slightly crazy. :)
Wondering where my therapy session will go tomorrow ....feeling flat last time she said i came across as very masculine. ... hmmm maybe I'll wear the bandana with skulls and roses on it
I've been out of the loop for quite a long time, but I'm just watching one of the US presidential debates and all I have to say is... really? These two?
Coming from a country where we voted in one dumbass, and just got an even dumber ass after the first one called for a vote that just brought the racists out to play, then quit, I feel for the folks in the US. I really do.
Politics. There should be a law against it.
Did it grow? Did it grow? Did it grow? How long is it going to take for them to grow? I was also thinking the same thing 12 hours after starting...
Well, a few days back the doc poked me with a question, as I'm solidly boy-mode, sorta (large pecs + breast initialization = starting with b-cups, painful b-cups..) They asked me if I did identify as female, I said yes and they left it at that; but it bugged me because other than the almost-purse, I've not allowed any further steps to girl mode, and the more I thought about it, the more it bugged me.
To add to the irritation, I had to acknowledge to myself that the gym and running is now more than a little painful without a bra, and I'm being stupid trying to hold back. So I toss the nipguards and slip on the sports bra (Fionna moving comfort, fwiw); and everything is so comfortable through my workout, no bleeding on the shirt, and even on the way home they don't get cold. It was really great.
Get home, clean up and I'm dozing off in front of the fan, and I get the awful, terrible fear that I could lose what little I have, an almost desperate dissatisfaction with the current flatness (I was laying on my back), the wrongness of it was absolutely overwhelming.
It took some self-therapy to get back to being me, to know that progress is slow, but I won't turn back.
I've gone with sports bra daily since, and its not happened again; but I think I now know why everyone doesn't just use the word "anxiety" instead of dysphoria; that was very different, very weird, and very awful.
Thus, I think, I'm thinking that I now actually know what dysphoria is.
Not to excited about the revelation....
I've noticed that often people will say one should never make assumptions and then reference the spelling of assume to read... ass - u- me meaning that when you make assumptions you make an ass out of both of us
But I think in reality the only one you make an ass of is yourself and no-one else is actually involved all too much
What if my friend hates me... It might be unfixable... unfixable... unfixable... unfixable... unfixable...
I wonder what the future is going to be like, was Kurzweil right? Is the singularity near? When can we just pop a pill, and change our physiology to our desire? Kurzweil better be right, dammit!
Why does the spell checker for Kurzweil suggest Rottweiler? lol
I wonder what the future will be like, when we are able to shift our forms around a bit. When everyone has the option, and can no longer use that tired and quite frankly moronic argument of chromosomes determining your gender, will we all finally be accepted, or will the might of the intellectually stunted ideologues still be laying claim to what a real man or a real woman is? I think more than likely, they will just push some other non issue, that has absolutely no impact on their life. Because ultimately, they feed on hate.
What if Wurlitzer and Kurzweil had a church organ standoff with Dana Carvey doing the
'Church Lady' character from the SNL skits as the contest judge?
Oh, that would be amazing! This must happen, immediately!
I've finally moved out after previously living at home with a not so supportive parent. Yet I still don't feel happy. Maybe it's because I feel like this will be taken away from me. Or maybe it's because I feel like I'll fail. Or maybe it's because I feel l don't know the real me from the the pretend me. Or when they interconnect. On the rare occasions I can socialise is that the real me or am I faking it due to wanting to stop impending anxiety or because I feel like I need to and should socialise. When I act fem am I doing it for myself or other people. Am I playing a part or is that the real me. I've lived so long at home I really don't have any answers.
I'm thinking that Christmas this year is a lonely and sucky time of year. I've been scrooged out of my job, family is scattered, mother is...mother, health is questionable. While things could be worse, they aren't rosy either.
At least I won't be around a bunch of people getting neurotic over making Christmas "perfect", and then getting angry when it isn't ;D
There is a bright side, Susan's can still be festive. Kylo, what would be your 'perfect' Christmas?
Quote from: LordKAT on December 24, 2016, 02:24:50 PM
There is a bright side, Susan's can still be festive. Kylo, what would be your 'perfect' Christmas?
A humble, relaxed one. I wouldn't mind seeing some relatives if they wanted to come over, but they live too far away for that. So just a quiet day, no work, no people getting upset, just chilling out and watching some movies or playing some games or something. My other half is present atm, but even if he wasn't that's still what I'd be doing. Maybe I'll go for a walk before dinner.
When I was a kid my parents had a habit of driving somewhere remote on Xmas and just walking for a few hours out there, or even going on holiday somewhere and spending it "away" from the Xmas hype. I'd either spend Xmas morning out walking with them, or relaxing in the house before they came back. But it's sort of ingrained in me now that I shouldn't just spend it in the house feeling underwhelmed, but to go out and enjoy some daylight or something.
One of the things I used to do with my kids was, on Christmas eve we would go for a drive and just look at all the decorated houses and lights. When we came back, hot cocoa and a snack followed by opening one present before bed. The light drive is still remembered fondly by my kids and was definitely a relaxing time. I think your walk idea is a good one for a relaxing Christmas celebration.
Nothing wrong with making your own Christmas traditions.
Thinking I'm going to commit an act of violence against that cherry 3.14 on the counter. ;D
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on December 26, 2016, 05:46:20 PM
Thinking I'm going to commit an act of violence against that cherry 3.14 on the counter. ;D
Hmmm? :eusa_think: Please elaborate, photos would help
Well, it was a big piece of pi, but now there's just a chalk outline of it and police tape around the kitchen! :laugh:
..and Devlyn with a gold painted halo no doubt.
Ah, sounds precariously similar to the fate of a slice of cheesecake and coffee encountered at my computer desk this morning
Did you use a fork, and was that fork plunged relentlessly with no thought of remorse or consequence into the poor innocent and unsuspecting pi !?!
I haven't spent a day this year without thinking about/doing work on some level.
The hardest thing has been taking 4 days off for Xmas and trying not to think business. I used to be kinda lazy. What happened to me.
2016 is soooo yesterday LOL
I'm extremely lucky to have the support of my wife and kids that I have. I am glad to have finally put the pieces of the puzzle together. I am lucky to find the wisdom intermingled among these pages of Susan's Place. I wish each and everyone reading this gains acceptance and understanding. As I write this my heart is filled with love for everyone here struggling to find themselves.
Thinking another year down and I still don't have a Nobel Peace Prize. It ain't looking good. :laugh:
Hugs, Devlyn
I'm suddenly regretting taking two hard science classes the same semester and I haven't even started them. (I mean, I needed to take them EVENTUALLY since I need one for my minor and one to fulfill a Core Classes requirement, but I could have timed them a lot better).
Also, earlier today my mom asked my 13-year old brother for cooking advice and I'm both proud of him and sorry for her.
How do I know that when something happens, it was something that should happen, or just something I imagined, and made happen?
For instance, in the past, whenever I'd decide to be in a relationship, I tended to have a picture of what kind of person I wanted, then that person would appear almost immediately, but after a while I'd feel claustrophobic and want out, then something would happen to end the relationship, and so on.
I now realize that my objections could have been my male side not wanting to play the wife role.
The other day, I was trying, once again, to think up someone to be with who would accept me for what I am, and wouldn't annoy me, and realized I couldn't decide between male or female (I'm androgynous, asexual/demi-sexual), so idly thought the perfect mate would be my ex-husband, but as a female.
When I checked my email that evening, there was an email from my ex saying he was going to transition to female and wanted to get back together.
Then I panicked, and wanted to change my mind, because he was badly behaving when we were last together, but I still seem to want to be with him, so he has continued to say he wants to get back with me.
The problem with our creating our own universe is getting ourselves to WANT the "right" things. But what is "right?" If we create our own universes, aren't we the ones deciding what is right?? ACKKK!
I almost miss my religious days when I was taught that "God" controls everything and we are helpless pawns who must remain passive and obedient.
I'm thinking that eating jalapeño enhanced pork rinds is a VERY bad idea for someone who does not do well with spicy foods.
Owwwwww. My tongue feels like it's been crushed in a vice. :'(
Quote from: Sephirah on January 04, 2017, 06:13:55 PM
I'm thinking that eating jalapeño enhanced pork rinds is a VERY bad idea for someone who does not do well with spicy foods.
Owwwwww. My tongue feels like it's been crushed in a vice. :'(
As someone who also does not deal well with spicy foods, I sympathize with you.
Quote from: Sephirah on January 04, 2017, 06:13:55 PM
I'm thinking that eating jalapeño enhanced pork rinds is a VERY bad idea for someone who does not do well with spicy foods.
Owwwwww. My tongue feels like it's been crushed in a vice. :'(
Just remember, as tasty and alluring as the hot and spicy may be, what goes in one end will eventually want to exit out the other >:-) Have you a fire extinguisher handy?
Quote from: V M on January 04, 2017, 07:30:05 PM
Just remember, as tasty and alluring as the hot and spicy may be, what goes in one end will eventually want to exit out the other >:-) Have you a fire extinguisher handy?
Oh dear, I don't even want to think about that. >_< Still, jet propulsion has its advantages ;)
I really don't know how some people do it.
Quote from: Sephirah on January 04, 2017, 07:32:19 PM
I really don't know how some people do it.
They have no sense of pain. On the other hand, if you make the mistake of eating something like that, a dairy product like milk held in you mouth will put the fire out. When you live near the Mexican border and you are a wimp, that's survival training.
Honestly, I'm addicted to capsicum. I have been since shortly after I started HRT.
This rum is mighty tasty, and my lips feel numb. A lot of people throughout my life have said alcohol has ruined their lives, but for me, it has saved my life. If I did not experience these moments of intoxication, I don't think I would be alive right now as they are but a brief period in time where I am free from the mundane.
It is in these moments, that I feel free.
I'm glad I have never formed an addiction, that I can stop and go for days without drinking. I don't know what I would do, if I could not drink ever again, this has been my escape for so long.
Beyond that, I am looking forward to my treadmill coming to me soon. I want to lose a bunch of weight, I'm going to cut back on protein and carbs, and do my best to cause muscle atrophy. I don't know if I will ever look as good as many of you girls, but I can always hope. I may never have that body I desire, but at the very least I will not have as much of a body that disgusts me now.
Earlier today, I packed away our Christmas tree, and I left a note along with it. It read "Did you make it?" I hope, by next December I have taken the steps toward making it. I hope I am not some 200-something pound person, filled with muscles, and self doubt, stuck in the same place I have been all of my life.
Yeah, just a bunch of different things. I'm a weird girl, what else can I say?
I'm glad my wife subscribed today to Susan's. It will hopefully give her an insight into the diversity that we all are. Hopefully it will also give our relationship a real chance to move forward.
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First snow of the season!
I'm thinking thank god I started cooking spaghetti bolognese
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This year is already looking very bleak. :'(
My throat is killing me [emoji22]
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I'm just wishing that I were not alive. I mean the universe is so huge, surely there's nothing I could do to effect it greatly. Wouldn't things be ok without me? I don't even really want to transition anymore; I am just so exhausted and find it hard to even try for anything anymore. I'm about a quarter way through life, but it feels like it's taking so long!
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Quote from: Amanda_Combs on January 19, 2017, 03:45:40 PM
I'm just wishing that I were not alive. I mean the universe is so huge, surely there's nothing I could do to effect it greatly. Wouldn't things be ok without me? I don't even really want to transition anymore; I am just so exhausted and find it hard to even try for anything anymore. I'm about a quarter way through life, but it feels like it's taking so long!
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*extra big hug*
I know those feelings well, sweetie. They're ones I battle with on a monthly, if not daily basis.
One thing I have learned, though, is to think small. Maybe we can't change the world, but we can change
our world. And maybe the worlds of people around us, with a kind word or deed. You'd be surprised how often that has a ripple effect, like a stone in a pond.
Where there's life, there's hope, hon. It sounds trite but it's true. For what it's worth, I wish you were alive. Every one of us has so much to offer in this world, and so much inside that's so beautiful. It's hard to see it, god I know that, but it's true. Keep going, okay? I hope, and believe that these feelings are only temporary.
Take some time to recharge your batteries. Spoil yourself and do something you enjoy, maybe. :)
Quote from: Sephirah on January 19, 2017, 04:44:56 PM
*extra big hug*
I know those feelings well, sweetie. They're ones I battle with on a monthly, if not daily basis.
One thing I have learned, though, is to think small. Maybe we can't change the world, but we can change our world. And maybe the worlds of people around us, with a kind word or deed. You'd be surprised how often that has a ripple effect, like a stone in a pond.
Where there's life, there's hope, hon. It sounds trite but it's true. For what it's worth, I wish you were alive. Every one of us has so much to offer in this world, and so much inside that's so beautiful. It's hard to see it, god I know that, but it's true. Keep going, okay? I hope, and believe that these feelings are only temporary.
Take some time to recharge your batteries. Spoil yourself and do something you enjoy, maybe. :)
Thank you SO much, sweetie! I'm still not sure that I feel any better, but I certainly feel better about feeling terrible. You said exactly what I needed to hear; it helped a lot! :D
My birth name, Dion, has always been pretty rare, but my reclaimed childhood nickname, Dee, is very common. I find myself turning my head when someone speaks or wondering when I posted something which some other Dee posted. I suppose I would have adapted to it long ago if I had been a Mike, or a John, or a Jack before transition.
I also find that Dee is often misheard on the phone. I get Steve, fairly frequently. My voice as part of the whole package gets by but, by itself, attenuated by the phone, it just passes less often than I would like.
At Fenway Health for my first doctor visit since 2008. I'm so nervous I think I'm going to throw up (needle phobia). Going to ask about the informed consent HRT program.
Hugs, Devlyn
Good luck Devlyn, think happy thoughts. X
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Thanks! I made it through the blood draw okay. Doctor is going to call me in a few days with my starting dosages! :D
Hugs, Devlyn
So happy for you! It's a long hard road with many steps to take. Just take comfort in the old saying; "the Devlyn is in the details"!
Congrats Dev. ;D
Hugs
Quote from: Dee Marshall on January 23, 2017, 01:13:04 PM
So happy for you! It's a long hard road with many steps to take. Just take comfort in the old saying; "the Devlyn is in the details"!
DING DING DING! We have the best post of the day! ;D
Quote from: V M on January 23, 2017, 06:33:10 PM
Congrats Dev. ;D
Hugs
Thanks, hon! :)
Hugs, Devlyn
That the T would stop making my shoulders so bulky/muscular and instead would give me facial hair :-\
To think I used to cringe at needles. . .
Will the month of January ever freakin' end?
I don't want it to end... too many deadlines to meet...
Food food food [emoji9]
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BURNT FOOD BURNT FOOD [emoji15][emoji854][emoji854][emoji854][emoji854]
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I'm feeling really depressed. So, for some reason, I decided to put the words "suicide and ->-bleeped-<-" into a search. Just over 50% of the results were anti-trans related.
Wow. I didn't think that it was possible to feel any worse than I do right now.
Among other things, I am thinking about the human predisposition to desire, and even conspire, to have one's cake, and eat it, too...
Or, tangentially, why it seems that those most prone to declare themselves on a path toward revealing inner truth seem to employ the least amount on intellectual honesty on their journey...
Hmm.
Hospital food is just as bland and suckie now as it was before :P
Quote from: V M on January 31, 2017, 09:40:11 PM
Hospital food is just as bland and suckie now as it was before :P
LOL!!!!
The food at Brassard's was chef-prepared, that kinda stuff can spoil a gal!
Quote from: MissGendered on January 31, 2017, 10:06:38 PM
LOL!!!!
The food at Brassard's was chef-prepared, that kinda stuff can spoil a gal!
Right on, sounds tasty
I'll have to keep Brassard's in mind
Quote from: V M on January 31, 2017, 10:57:17 PM
Right on, sounds tasty
I'll have to keep Brassard's in mind
Three hot meals a day, plenty of snacks and beverages, 24/7 nursing care, cable, comfy beds, and beautiful Montréal for a backdrop. Not to mention amazing sensation and aesthetics post-op, and he is drop dead handsome, too! Plus, the exchange rate is very favorable if you are a US client...
Missy
I was thought to be a stillborn upon birth, sometimes I wish they would have left it at that rather than bringing me about
Bringing someone into this world is probably the cruelest thing anyone could ever do to another person
Quote from: V M on February 07, 2017, 02:42:30 AM
I was thought to be a stillborn upon birth, sometimes I wish they would have left it at that rather than bringing me about
Bringing someone into this world is probably the cruelest thing anyone could ever do to another person
((HUGS))
The cruelest thing is actually to take a newborn baby girl from her mother and begin mutilating her lady parts and sterilizing her, if'n ya ask me. But hey, I am biased that way, lol..
Still, life goes on, and now I can bake lemon berry poppyseed cake to eat with my morning coffee, so all is well that ends well!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi347.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fp471%2Ftallgirllooking%2F7xp6eljz9il_zps0bxjmsfo.jpeg&hash=1b0b9109261c43c98052f89615f811b399b8c02d) (http://s347.photobucket.com/user/tallgirllooking/media/7xp6eljz9il_zps0bxjmsfo.jpeg.html)
I'm thinking I think too much.
Tired [emoji42] of hearing the voices in my head
God mental illness sucks [emoji37]
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You would think that I would know better. I've been on spironolactone for two and a half years.
I started full time working with TBI patients at the beginning of January. I go to their homes and spend between two and five hours with them. Often I see two clients per day and often drive 90 minutes or more to and from each session. This can take me through areas where bathrooms are few and far between. Consequently I've cut back on my water intake. Last night it caught up with me.
I fell asleep reading and woke up two hours later. I got up to get undressed and pee before officially going to sleep for the night. Due to dehydration I was dizzy, disoriented, and both calves were cramping so badly that my left foot was twisted to the left. I collapsed to the floor, crying loudly.
Randi asked me if I was alright. In a small voice I told her "no". She put me into her own bed with her, massaged my calves with arnica and made me drink a tall glass of water then got me another to sip through the night.
If she was not here I would have laid there on the floor until the symptoms eased and they probably would not have eased without water which was nowhere in reach. If I lived alone and with the independence of my job it's likely no one would have found me. I could have died!
If you're on spiro, drink plenty of water. You might embarrass yourself by peeing your pants but you'll be alive to be embarrassed.
Just saw a website with knitting patterns for falsies. They call them ""knitted knockers".
Quote from: Dee Marshall on February 22, 2017, 02:42:37 PM
Just saw a website with knitting patterns for falsies. They call them ""knitted knockers".
HA HA HA ;D ;D coffee everywhere....
I just want to live the rest of my life as myself. no lies or pretending. You would think that wouldn't hurt anyone...you'd think so anyway.
No wonder I've had such bad undiagnosable digestive issues my entire life, I have PTSD and apparently PTSD can affect your digestion :( well, at least I know why the doctor wasn't able to find anything for years on end!
well think its time to have a shower and change into something sexy (don't mean to say I will look sexy!!!!) and theres naff all to watch on TV
Quote from: maksim on February 24, 2017, 10:21:00 AM
No wonder I've had such bad undiagnosable digestive issues my entire life, I have PTSD and apparently PTSD can affect your digestion :( well, at least I know why the doctor wasn't able to find anything for years on end!
Yep, I hear you on that one
Sometimes people tell me how lucky I am to have survived some of the experiences I've had, but sometimes I don't really feel all that lucky :-\
Time to go to H Mart and hope my sister doesn't embarrass herself (and me) again ::)
H Mart, the Asian supermarket? I love that place!
Quote from: Dee Marshall on February 27, 2017, 01:25:49 PM
H Mart, the Asian supermarket? I love that place!
Yes! It's so great, but my sister is kinda obsessed with Korean pop culture and tends to make a fool of herself by squealing ridiculous phrases in Korean to get attention from nearby boys. It's kind of embarrassing to go there with her, but if I go without her she'll throw a fit ::) Oh well, I'm gonna get myself some good food and pretend I don't know her ;)
I used to have a friend who liked to shout "Rook Gozirra!" when we went for sushi. I was always surprised that they didn't poison us.
Ugh, I hate PTSD nightmares... That was a bad one!
Quote from: maksim on February 28, 2017, 06:27:31 AM
Ugh, I hate PTSD nightmares... That was a bad one!
I'm really sorry that you're dealing with that. [emoji170][emoji170][emoji170]
Quote from: Amanda_Combs on February 28, 2017, 08:53:11 AM
I'm really sorry that you're dealing with that. [emoji170][emoji170][emoji170]
It's alright, thank you! :)
Being the adventures of a young man whose principle interest is trying to find an NHS dentist within 50 miles.
It's amazing how quickly I can move through my schoolwork with this new program my school uses! It gives me motivation to stay ahead of track. :^)
My wife's hairstylist doing my hair yesterday.I have past the shoulder length hair,5 inch trim and did my hair in a femme style.I loved it and still do.Knows I am fulltime crossdresser and said I look beautiful dressed as a woman too
thinking I should not have had that 2nd glass of red last night , trouble waking and no concentration all day and the dreams!!! Non tonight as have blood /liver test on Wednesday for hrt.
Social media and web 2.0 has brought out the worst in people. I feel this constant urge to fight against it, to make people think, to bring about uncertainty in everything. We have built the largest echo chamber, one that surpasses even religion, and the sickness of our own human nature has been amplified.
Humility is losing out, and that is not good.
I wrote a new song for my teacher and made a video for it, but I'm not sure if she'll like it :')
Randi and I have difficulty being strong in the face of adversity at the same time. Luckily we vary rarely are weak in the face of adversity at the same time.
I think I think to much I think.......
I'm thinking about my direct deposit :P
aaaany time now.
Depression that is induced by gender dysphoria sucks. But, performing/recording some Noise is a good cure for it. I just wish that it wasn't a temporary fix.
Oh don't go asking me that. Telling my daughter.
Looking at my e-mails from the 2 clinics I have emailed recently... I go from a strange mindset of being somewhat enthusiastic about the possibility of starting to transition then realise my current living/financial situation isn't the best to even be considering it then back to thinking that it's maybe best to try and ignore these feelings and hope they go away? They never do tho, they come back stronger....
Unfortunately in every day life it's hard to ignore, you'll be walking down the street and you'll see women and it will I guess trigger some dysphoria in me and bring me back to square 1.
I don't know why I made this so long ago, but finding it again was hilarious!
I don't know either, I started this topic a few years ago as a view into other people's thoughts and maybe learn a bit
Quote from: V M on March 22, 2017, 02:30:44 AM
I don't know either, I started this topic a few years ago as a view into other people's thoughts and maybe learn a bit
I love this topic, I was referring to a song I wrote! But yes, it's a really good topic to have in case you want to vent, or even just share your thoughts. :)
Quote from: maksim on March 22, 2017, 11:13:23 AM
I love this topic, I was referring to a song I wrote! But yes, it's a really good topic to have in case you want to vent, or even just share your thoughts. :)
Right on ;D I have written a few songs also and yeah, sometimes I go back and look at some of them and just laugh myself silly LOL
Quote from: Valkria01 on March 13, 2017, 12:10:06 AM
I'm thinking about my direct deposit :P
aaaany time now.
Literally refreshing my bank account as we speak waiting for mine... ;D
too many things, too many things...
-praying someone will buy my car so i can get back at least some of the money i had to spend on a new one
-being mad that the apartments i was going to look into told me they had no available units despite still having a sign up
-being disappointed that the moment i finally hit my saving goal, i had to spend about four months' worth of it
-constantly cycling between feeling hopeful and feeling utterly hopeless because all my plans end up going wrong due to factors outside of my control
-wondering if my dad knows anyone who might want to buy my car, but feeling sort of bad about asking
-dreading the fact that it's my mom's birthday and thus i feel obligated to talk to her; i told her happy birthday through text, but i don't know if that's enough...
-not wanting to go to work
-not knowing what to take to work for lunch and wishing i had my own food, knowing i'll have to go to work if i want a chance to get out and buy groceries that don't send me to the john half the day...
-wishing my friend would come over for a visit already, but thinking it probably won't happen just like it didn't last week or any of the months before that
-regretting eating that bag of m&ms...
Came out to a coworker who is on maternity leave, and it's now more than 24 hours with no reply from her (and I know she read it—this is whatsapp). She's from retro Moldova, but she seems to be quite open and I don't think I made the wrong decision...
I think I'll wait a couple of days and talk to her about any other thing, then add a small paragraph within parentheses telling her I know it takes time and she doesn't have to say anything right now.
I want real ramen!
Stuff
I am an empty vessel.
What if people who were figuratively "Trippin' Lizards" were actually going about and physically trippin' lizards? >:-)
What's a good breakfast wine?
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Cases cases cases... Sentence structure... Verb conjugation... Vocabulary!
Quote from: TonyaW on April 14, 2017, 06:41:08 AM
What's a good breakfast wine?
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A red or a white. ;D.
Everything OK?
Hugs, Devlyn
I wish I wasn't so depressed all the time, today is just meh...
I just took my first estradiol tablet a few hours ago, where the hell are my tits?
Lots of things, keep putting off emailing back a clinic I emailed in London because I don't want to start transition until I move out (23, it's about time)
Ordered some clothes to see what size I am in female clothing and it surprisingly pretty much fit although I don't have much of a female shape in terms of weight distribution so it made me sad so quickly threw them out in before the rubbish collection so they're gone.
My height being 6ft is always on my mind too, I tend to Google / save pictures of female celebrities who are 6ft and look great to remind myself that it's possible but eh, I am just a regular person.
Just lots of sad thoughts lately.
Sorry for the rant, this is the only place I can kind of rant and haven't posted in a while (I do lurk lots tho!)
Blah.
J2J
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on April 14, 2017, 05:37:05 PM
I just took my first estradiol tablet a few hours ago, where the hell are my tits?
This made me laugh.
I said the same thing to my therapist except it was 2 weeks instead of a few hours and I'm pretty sure I said boobs and not tits.
HRT is certainly tests your patience.
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Oh dear. I'm thinking I ought to put on a touch of makeup and my wig, grab my purse and go to Target to buy a wallet and base & top coat polish. But......
Hugs,
Jeanette
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 14, 2017, 04:10:41 PM
A red or a white. ;D.
Everything OK?
Hugs, Devlyn
Everything is fine. Woke up with that thought in my head, I think left over from a dream that I do not remember.
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Sveta has such a cute voice, I may cry!
Quote from: TonyaW on April 14, 2017, 10:10:21 PM
This made me laugh.
I said the same thing to my therapist except it was 2 weeks instead of a few hours and I'm pretty sure I said boobs and not tits.
HRT is certainly tests your patience.
Oh I know, I'm just having fun with it.
Tablet #2 taken, still waiting for the boob fairy... Lol
Time since starting HRT seems to be flying by, yet it's not fast enough. For what? Heck, I don't know, it's just not fast enough.
Jeanette
I need to go to bed and hope my ear piercing goes ok tomorrow
Why do technical difficulties follow me everywhere I go? I just want to listen to music. >:(
If the universe is so large why can't I find a place for myself?
Give them the pickle!
Didn't get much sleep last night, could hardly stay awake for today's appt.s
Endo appt. tomorrow, just now found out what time the transport will be picking me up
Could crash pretty hard right now but have to stay awake awhile longer to lock up the building for the night
I see so many "Dee"s my age! When they thought I was a boy my name was so rare and I hated that. Now they know I'm a girl and I'm part of a gaggle. So comfortable here!
I can't wait for my Team Russia hoodie to come in! I wonder what it'll smell like. Hopefully not bad!
It would make me so happy to find an ISU Team Russia hoodie replica :laugh: It would probably be about $200 though!
Pretty warm day today, it got up to almost 90°....I just found a tick on myself, I'm ready for winter again!
Ugh, I hate ticks :P Had to dig a stubborn one out of my arm with my pocket knife one time
Speaking of ticks, my Tourette's is getting bad again.
I'm wondering how my teachers will react when I arrive at school tomorrow. It's been a few weeks since I've been, and since my school is a very small building and basically one room, I may be put in the conference room by myself, or told to work from home from now on.
I wouldn't mind either situation, but it's difficult.
Yuck, I just pulled another one off my stomach.
Goofin' with a female is much like playing with firecrackers, but firecrackers tend to be much less dangerous
I'm thinking about songs I've been writing with my new singer/writing partner, and looking forward to seeing her this weekend. [emoji3]
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At this point I think I would be profoundly embarrassed to be asked what my pronouns are unless it was at a venue where people went out of their way not to make assumptions.
I still don't give a care about anyone else's oppininin
I've just had a few hundred PAP smear brushes delivered, I wonder what people are thinking ::)
Pat Smear may be a bit Jealous
Pat Smear@yahoo.com
Quote from: V M on June 04, 2017, 01:23:48 AM
Pat Smear may be a bit Jealous
Pat Smear@yahoo.com
If there ever was a reason for a name change!
So why are you beating me up?
Okay, maybe I'm wrong, It's been a rough weekend with my sister and all :P
Talking to my sister about my father's health just about killed me
Yes, you are my best sister and I am not talking of you
I can't keep telling people that I feel truly happy when I break down inside at the slightest mention of something related to my trauma.
I have to think more and more about putting my mother in a nursery home.
[emoji20]
I'm sittin' here cryin my eyes out while you all are doin' your silly ass power dances
I have to wait one more day until the lootbox thing resets on Overwatch. Only other way I can keep getting lootboxes is through ranking up, but I'm not a big fan of ranks in games since they may not be reflective of someone's skill in gameplay.
I'm now just playing GTA V to try and unlock customisation items (guns and maybe clothes for my dude). Few seem to want to play jobs which award lots of RP (or XP).
need to paint my nails but Hot Rod club Tuesday night and no one knows yet, clear coat then. Think I can cope with 2 days of slight dysphoria
I really hate when people, especially strangers, talk like I'm hurting them simply by existing. They seem to think that their theories are more true than medical facts and more precious than my existence.
I guess I let them do it, though. It sometimes seems that their arguments have enough internal consistency to make me half agree and then feel guilty for continuing to breathe.
This one has been floating around in my head the past few days since I remembered a bit more of my childhood. (For years I remembered almost nothing before the age of ten.):
I'm not different because I was abused.
I was abused because I'm different.
A death in the family is no excuse for my ill behavior :icon_no: all apologies if I insulted anyone
Big hug! If it didn't work, c'mon up to Boston and I'll show you how
to REALLY get under people's skin! >:-) :laugh: ;D
Hugs, Devlyn
Even when playing games or talking to other gamers I'm not safe from envying women.
Thank god my mom is willing to listen to others, even if it's not me!
As if I hadn't embarrassed myself enough lately, I can't believe what a genius I am sometimes, I have COPD and use a daily inhaler to maintain my ability to breath well you are supposed rinse your mouth out after each use but I got in a bit of a hurry to get ready this morning and accidentally swallowed the rinse water :eusa_doh: May as well had been a bottle of bleach :icon_blink: Lungs are definitely clear now though, so is my stomach and everything else :icon_blah:
The good thing is after making a mistake like that, I rarely repeat it again.
Quote from: V M on June 05, 2017, 04:39:08 PM
As if I hadn't embarrassed myself enough lately, I can't believe what a genius I am sometimes, I have COPD and use a daily inhaler to maintain my ability to breath well you are supposed rinse your mouth out after each use but I got in a bit of a hurry to get ready this morning and accidentally swallowed the rinse water :eusa_doh: May as well had been a bottle of bleach :icon_blink: Lungs are definitely clear now though, so is my stomach and everything else :icon_blah:
I read this just as I was putting on my humidifier that I use to keep my new trachea clear - I went back and rechecked all of the solutions!
Did you find anything that might help? I not feeling so good
Quote from: V M on June 05, 2017, 07:30:45 PM
Did you find anything that might help? I not feeling so good
What was it that you swallowed? Try drinking milk maybe?
Weird day for me. A client told that his stepfather, who's in his 80's and speaks very little English "likes" me and thinks I'm cute. When I got home I watched "Mamma Mia" with Randi and actually enjoyed it. I knew I was girly but I had no Idea that I was THAT girly!
Just been playing games and eaten. I don't know if I want to be a guy or not.
Top surgery, top surgery... I hope you come along soon.
https://www.thrillist.com/entertainment/nation/how-i-make-300k-stripping-in-vegas
Apart from the fact that she dances in front of men, I envy her. Sure, I can get a desk job that pays as much as this, but I don't get to look and even think how I want, especially with this stuff about intellectual property going on for the latter.
Also, my mother's in hospital, again, this time maybe for her trapped nerves.
Saw one of my old teachers from secondary school today. Strangely I saw her a year ago at a nearby shopping centre. I probably should have talked to her but no idea what I'd say. She was really kind to me at school.
I can't believe the fact that a group of people who are constantly being misunderstood attacked for something they can't help would be so willing to attack another group of people who deal with the same thing.
It's been days and I'm still angry about it.
What am I thinking? I'm thinking about quitting my job. I'm thinking about how to lose weight. I'm thinking about how to get people to actually work. So many people just put in applications, and then don't bother to show up for their interviews. Wondering how to fix the lazy funk that is in my area. Thinking about how my wife is doing so far away from me. Thinking about a means to get the money to remove a cyst from my dogs paw. Thinking of ways to get money to move closer to my family. Thinking of ways to get money to get the beard burned off...permanently. I'm thinking of a new career that would suit me better, and what that might be. I think about what was, what is, what could have been, what will be, and the ever shifting strands of life the universe and everything.
I try to answer these questions daily:
Who are you?
Why are you here?
What do you want?
The answer changes, sometimes, depending on the affects of exterior influences on my life.
We had one heck of a storm here where I live today, the thunder literally sounded like a Naval ship firing off it's big guns, I can't remember how many there were but it shook the ground :o One knocked me onto my bed and the next bounced me back up into my pile of dirty clothes
Decided to go make a pot of coffee to try and settle my nerves :P Haven't heard a sound like that in over 20 years, kinda freaked out
How come it seems like I need blow my nose right after I put my make-up on but never before?
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∆ This!
Do you use any powdered makeup?
Liquid foundation. Not much powder ever if any
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Quote from: TonyaW on June 16, 2017, 06:11:41 PM
Liquid foundation. Not much powder ever if any
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It's unlikely to be tickling your nose, then.
Quote from: Dee Marshall on June 16, 2017, 08:59:39 PM
It's unlikely to be tickling your nose, then.
Didnt think it was anything like that. Just never seem to have to blow my nose before and no allergies so not like I'm sniffling on a regular basis.
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How can someone who claims to love you, claims to be an Ally, claims to have a great understanding....still misgender you and misname you despite me taking over an hour to explain how both these things affect me...within 60 seconds of me finishing he had misnamed and misgendered me...
Quote from: ElizabethK on June 17, 2017, 09:12:05 AM
How can someone who claims to love you, claims to be an Ally, claims to have a great understanding....still misgender you and misname you despite me taking over an hour to explain how both these things affect me...within 60 seconds of me finishing he had misnamed and misgendered me...
Sounds like he's just giving you lip service.
Hopefully I'm wrong.
Ryuichi
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Shouldn't there be a disclaimer that says "non-operational on weekends" or something, rather than saying "open any time"...?
Quote from: Ryuichi13 on June 17, 2017, 04:50:55 PM
Sounds like he's just giving you lip service.
Hopefully I'm wrong.
Ryuichi
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I know and agree with you Ryuichi
The sad thing is that it was my 76 year old father I was talking about...He refuses to accept that his words harm me...
Quote from: ElizabethK on June 17, 2017, 06:36:48 PM
I know and agree with you Ryuichi
The sad thing is that it was my 76 year old father I was talking about...He refuses to accept that his words harm me...
It sounds terrible, but maybe if you SHOWED him how it made you feel. Become sad, or even cry. If nothing else, it might shake him up enough to think twice.
If my SO's 92 year old Mom can feel bad when she slips up and misgenders me, and then has the heart to apologize, I'm sure your Dad can do the same. But then again, at their age, its difficult to change a lifetime of habit. Just keep correcting him, he'll (hopefully) eventually get it.
Good luck.
Ryuichi
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Quote from: ElizabethK on June 17, 2017, 06:36:48 PM
I know and agree with you Ryuichi
The sad thing is that it was my 76 year old father I was talking about...He refuses to accept that his words harm me...
My dad's the same. Even though I wrote him an email explaining everything he misgendered me. So I had to send him a text explaining how it made me feel. Now he doesn't call me anything but calls me by my real name and pronouns to other people. So sorta progress. Although refuses to apologise for misgendering me and being unsupportive.
Hope it gets better for you.
Quote from: Elis on June 18, 2017, 02:48:26 AM
My dad's the same. Even though I wrote him an email explaining everything he misgendered me. So I had to send him a text explaining how it made me feel. Now he doesn't call me anything but calls me by my real name and pronouns to other people. So sorta progress. Although refuses to apologise for misgendering me and being unsupportive.
Hope it gets better for you.
How did you get through to him?
Quote from: ElizabethK on June 19, 2017, 06:02:59 AM
How did you get through to him?
I think it just took time; cliché as it sounds. Being on T while living at home I guess sort of helped because it made it more real as he could see the physical and mental changes happen right in front of him. And I guess now being transgender is generally mentioned more frequently in the media he can see I'm not mentally crazy and it has a biological cause; as there are others like me. Plus now I look male I think he understands that calling me female in public will make him look crazy.
Thanks Elis
Thinking about ice cream.
Mischief managed. Good night. :)
Hugs, Devlyn
I wish my neighbors would stop badgering me about weird stupid stuff I'd never even think about
They're always going around in circles trying to make trouble for whoever they've decided to target for abuse, reminds me of high school :P
That was a LOT of roast beef. Was. ;D
I wonder if the Planned Parenthood I'm considering going to has the gel option for T. I really don't want to inject.....
hows the song go, 57 channels and nothing on. I like channel 58 (susans)
Now that I'm rarely misgendered Randi and I are always getting asked if we want separate checks in restaurants.
:
April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!
Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.
They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
Think outside the voice box!
I'm thinking I'm boringly old but I still don't look it enough to get respect anywhere.
I'm trying to get back into susans and I'm thinking about that.
I recently started crying in public while I was carrying a 5-pound jar of pickle spears home. I found a nostalgic nirvana cd at the library store but everybody was laughing about my large picklebaby so I got back to laughing quick.
Not long after that I tried to explain Pansy Division to my sorta-normal kid. That was confusing.
Only 29 days until surgery! Where the hell did the last 2 months go :o. And I got two weeks until my pre op appointment; I hope I'm healthy enough to be approved :P
It seems like my father, in his own way, has come to accept the fact that I am not interested in men. Yesterday, he told me that I'm going to need to make more money if I wanted to date "whichever way" I go. It just feels weird that he feels the need to mention "whichever way". I asked him why he's making a big deal about it, and he said he wasn't because there were plenty of "those" orientation at his work. I get that it's not intentional on his part, but it still rubs me the wrong way. Why not "whenever you find someone"? I told him he doesn't have to worry about that, because I have no intention of seeking someone, though.
I told my best friend, a beautiful woman that has supported me, that I would love to have a sexual and romantic relationship with her. Unfortunately she did not take it well, and now it seems I've lost my bestie.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Quote from: MirandaLove on August 27, 2017, 07:02:15 PM
I told my best friend, a beautiful woman that has supported me, that I would love to have a sexual and romantic relationship with her. Unfortunately she did not take it well, and now it seems I've lost my bestie.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Good on you for being brave to say how you feel. I only wish I was that brave.
I think it's more a surprise to her and with time and discussion who knows.
Good luck and good fortune.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Some folks require extra cheese on their corn, others don't
Quote from: V M on September 05, 2017, 11:18:58 PM
Some folks require extra cheese on their corn, others don't
I've never seen cheese on corn. Popcorn, and meals with corn in it, but never just on corn.
Unless your meaning corny people give some cheesy smiles? I do that all the time.
What I'm going to talk to my therapist about tomorrow night.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
I don't get paid to work at night. I get paid to stand in an empty building and twiddle my thumbs for a few hours at night
Quote from: immortal gypsy on September 07, 2017, 05:57:45 AM
I don't get paid to work at night. I get paid to stand in an empty building and twiddle my thumbs for a few hours at night
My dream job! ;D
Girl who gets dressed while still asleep, wakes up with bra in uncomfortable position
I need more Hall's Vitamin C Defense Drops.......
My thoughts are with the victims of the Sept. 11 attacks
Some people impress you with their intellect, others will amaze you with their ignorance and/or stupidity
Then there are those individuals who just confuse and amuse you to no end and you, and you, and you just scratch your head thinking...
"What the Hecks?"
I try not to think. it usually get me into trouble
Laurie
I can't believe this is happening. After 50 years of needing this, I can't believe it's happening!
Numerous thoughts
Why can't Boston put away the AL East yet??? WHY
Why did I decide it was a good idea to wear brand new heels for a 9 hour shift last week. My ankles are still thanking me for it.
Should I buy a new pair of work pants or a work skirt. More importantly, will a skirt improve the amount of tips I take home
Made me think it depends how short it is and how good your legs look. Before that (watching ,ok its on as nothing else worth watching, kill bill vol 2) and wanting to look a bit like Erma Thurman
Why, despite the fact that my voice therapist said I've made incredible progress and sound female, do I still retch at my voice when practicing/speaking?
Quote from: IzzyC on September 29, 2017, 07:09:22 PM
Why, despite the fact that my voice therapist said I've made incredible progress and sound female, do I still retch at my voice when practicing/speaking?
Very few if any people like to hear their voice played back. Bone connection causes us to hear our voice differently when we speak and on playback, the voice sound different but we still recognize it as ours. To prove this, record anybodies voice and play it back to them. I am pretty sure they will not like to hear their own voice.
Quote from: Dena on September 29, 2017, 07:14:21 PM
Very few if any people like to hear their voice played back. Bone connection causes us to hear our voice differently when we speak and on playback, the voice sound different but we still recognize it as ours. To prove this, record anybodies voice and play it back to them. I am pretty sure they will not like to hear their own voice.
I get that, and that's whats going on in my head. I hear myself as I speak and it sounds horrible. She told me to buy a recorder and listen to myself and I know she's right. Even I gendered my recorded voice female (not perfect or girly, but still female). I just wish that what you said wasn't true, because while my voice "passes" if I concentrate on cadence and such; I don't hear it that way myself.
Tomorrow.
Tomorrow, I see the doc, again, for more pills, again, and then I see a therapist,where I start to unravel and make sense of why my world is fear.
And all the while I sit here and try to get to sleep, but can't, because I'm anxious. Ironic.
Rowan
I'm thinking my ears are screaming and aspirin isn't working on this headache I've had for several days.
5 months full-time and first time in the office wearing a skirt (always trousers before), just coz I can now, it's the simple things [emoji16]
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I like that one Megan. Good for you girl.
Tnx Laurie, I hope your headache clears up soon. X
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I'm thinking of getting a big heavy stick, painting it pink and whacking my manager with it every time he dead-names' me. It's not deliberate, he just blurts it out sometimes, but after 5 months I'm loosing patience!
Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
Quote from: meganjames2 on October 04, 2017, 07:05:46 AM
I'm thinking of getting a big heavy stick, painting it pink and whacking my manager with it every time he dead-names' me. It's not deliberate, he just blurts it out sometimes, but after 5 months I'm loosing patience!
Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
Hmmmmm I'm questioning the advisability of the idea Megan. You may want to give it a bit more thought before implementing it. (At least make sure you use a pretty shade of pink)
Hugs,
Laurie
Quote from: Laurie on October 04, 2017, 07:10:21 AM
Hmmmmm I'm questioning the advisability of the idea Megan. You may want to give it a bit more thought before implementing it. (At least make sure you use a pretty shade of pink)
Hugs,
Laurie
Only the prettiest [emoji6]
Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
Quote from: immortal gypsy on September 29, 2017, 04:16:14 AM
Numerous thoughts
Why can't Boston put away the AL East yet??? WHY
Why did I decide it was a good idea to wear brand new heels for a 9 hour shift last week. My ankles are still thanking me for it.
Should I buy a new pair of work pants or a work skirt. More importantly, will a skirt improve the amount of tips I take home
Pants? Yuk! Always go for the skirt or dress, kilt if you have to. It's fall, so it's plaid time.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
Thinking if two coats of holographic Sparkle nail polish is enough, or if I should go for a third and full unicorn!
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...three it is, full unicorn power! Tremble...
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Quote from: Gertrude on October 04, 2017, 07:52:09 AM
Pants? Yuk! Always go for the skirt or dress, kilt if you have to. It's fall, so it's plaid time.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
Southern Hemisphere so it's the opposite: Crooks chase cops, Cats have puppies, Hot snow falls up
You can NEVER have enough plaid in your wardrobe
Is it possible for someone to have watched too much of The Simpsons????
Quote from: immortal gypsy on October 06, 2017, 03:55:24 AM
Quote from: Gertrude on October 04, 2017, 07:52:09 AM
Pants? Yuk! Always go for the skirt or dress, kilt if you have to. It's fall, so it's plaid time.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
Southern Hemisphere so it's the opposite: Crooks chase cops, Cats have puppies, Hot snow falls up
You can NEVER have enough plaid in your wardrobe
Is it possible for someone to watch too much of The Simpsons????
Hi Honey! How are you? Long time no
bets see.
Love
Cindy
Quote from: Cindy on October 06, 2017, 03:57:36 AM
Southern Hemisphere so it's the opposite: Crooks chase cops, Cats have puppies, Hot snow falls up
You can NEVER have enough plaid in your wardrobe
Is it possible for someone to watch too much of The Simpsons????
Hi Honey! How are you? Long time no bets see.
Love
Cindy
Good busy finding my feet in another location, babysitting overgrown children. Sorry helping grown adults lose their hard earned money on outcomes they have no control over, and tell them they will have the same result if they just give the money to me. (Except I will be happier)
How have you been Cindy
First thing that popped in my head when I read the thread title:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FnMnXexj.jpg%3F1&hash=1a0f01939ed134ba41596619a1783f98d91be91d) (https://imgur.com/nMnXexj)
Hope some of you remember this and smile/laugh.
HUGS!
Quote from: immortal gypsy on October 06, 2017, 04:08:21 AM
Quote from: Cindy on October 06, 2017, 03:57:36 AM
Southern Hemisphere so it's the opposite: Crooks chase cops, Cats have puppies, Hot snow falls up
You can NEVER have enough plaid in your wardrobe
Is it possible for someone to watch too much of The Simpsons????
Hi Honey! How are you? Long time no bets see.
Love
Cindy
Good busy finding my feet in another location, babysitting overgrown children. Sorry helping grown adults lose their hard earned money on outcomes they have no control over, and tell them they will have the same result if they just give the money to me. (Except I will be happier)
How have you been Cindy
I'm good. Decided to have my larynx removed, seemed a good idea at the time. Recovering well and don't have to worry about yodelling lessons.
Given my current economic situation, my good results from HRT, and the utter dearth of misgendering over the past six months I'm ready to declare my transition complete. As things stand I don't expect to be able to afford laser, electrolysis, orchiectomy, or GCS any time in the forseeable future. If my economic situation changes, if I win the lottery, find out about the death of a long lost rich uncle or become the next Queen of England, I will revisit this. In the meantime I'll enjoy my life and my womanhood and try to keep my fears of future nursing home abuse at bay.
:
April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!
Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.
They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
Think outside the voice box!
Its about time I went full time but wigs will be a couple of weeks to delivery.
Been making a mental to do list of things I need to pick up before I head out on my cruise in two weeks. All the big stuff is done. Like clothes, passport, money etc etc. Now it is just the little things like getting suntan lotion, post it notes, phone chargers etc etc.
Has anyone been on a cruise before? This is my first. I am going with my best friend. We are celebrating her 30th birthday. Originally, we were going to St. Thomas, St. Marten, and Puerto Rico. But with the hurricane, our plans were changed. Now we are heading to St John's, St. Kittes, and oddly enough Puerto Rico still. Doubt we are going there. But I am pretty excited. It is an 8 day cruise and I hope it is a fun time. I have some clothes that are male, but I am also bringing along a dress and may wear it in the cabin for a little while.
Quote from: SarahMarie1987 on October 08, 2017, 11:10:38 AM
Been making a mental to do list of things I need to pick up before I head out on my cruise in two weeks. All the big stuff is done. Like clothes, passport, money etc etc. Now it is just the little things like getting suntan lotion, post it notes, phone chargers etc etc.
Has anyone been on a cruise before? This is my first. I am going with my best friend. We are celebrating her 30th birthday. Originally, we were going to St. Thomas, St. Marten, and Puerto Rico. But with the hurricane, our plans were changed. Now we are heading to St John's, St. Kittes, and oddly enough Puerto Rico still. Doubt we are going there. But I am pretty excited. It is an 8 day cruise and I hope it is a fun time. I have some clothes that are male, but I am also bringing along a dress and may wear it in the cabin for a little while.
I've been on four. I'm sure you'll have a great time! Which cruise line?
:
April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!
Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.
They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
Think outside the voice box!
I'm thinking of the ex I ran into yesterday with his new g/f. He's not someone I cared to ever see again, but we all make mistakes. I was out eating dinner with a bunch of girlfriends and he comes up to me at my table and taps me on the shoulder. I saw him previously, but I was avoiding him out of being polite...
He also said he had to text me for something... weird.
Quote from: immortal gypsy on October 06, 2017, 03:55:24 AM
Southern Hemisphere so it's the opposite: Crooks chase cops, Cats have puppies, Hot snow falls up
You can NEVER have enough plaid in your wardrobe
Is it possible for someone to have watched too much of The Simpsons????
Tartan rocks. I have a couple kilts. If men tried it, they'd give up on pants.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
I want to work some more on one of my anime fanfiction stories.
Instead, I'm lying here on my bed, listening to Japanese metal, reading other people's fanfiction and loving being my newly-dyed back-to-redheaded self. [emoji57] I think the red really makes my beard stand out! (The hair-thingies were where it was supposed to be purple. Maybe I'll try again to re-dye that part in a few weeks.)
Sent from my SM-G930P using Tapatalk
(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20171010/80b18fe328c09cc5122bc8860bd0683a.jpg)
Ryuichi
As Halloween approaches I'm not quite sure what to make of some of the psychopathic neighbors at my apt.s
I show no fear although I often do not feel safe here
Quote from: SarahMarie1987 on October 08, 2017, 11:10:38 AM
Has anyone been on a cruise before? This is my first. I am going with my best friend. We are celebrating her 30th birthday. Originally, we were going to St. Thomas, St. Marten, and Puerto Rico. But with the hurricane, our plans were changed. Now we are heading to St John's, St. Kittes, and oddly enough Puerto Rico still. Doubt we are going there. But I am pretty excited. It is an 8 day cruise and I hope it is a fun time. I have some clothes that are male, but I am also bringing along a dress and may wear it in the cabin for a little while.
I've been on two cruises so far. One was along the Baja peninsula and the other went around to Cozumel, Grand Cayman, and Jamaica. They were quite fun and a great way to see a number of places in a relatively short time. Be prepared to gain about 10 pounds ;D
Disembarking takes a while since customs was a pain, but all in all I'd go again.
Rush sounds WAY more awesome after a few months on HRT.
So far it has been 2112, Hemispheres, and A Farewell To Kings. (I swear the only drugs I have taken today are HRT and dayquil)
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on October 12, 2017, 09:28:42 PM
Rush sounds WAY more awesome after a few months on HRT.
So far it has been 2112, Hemispheres, and A Farewell To Kings. (I swear the only drugs I have taken today are HRT and dayquil)
Dayquil will do that to you all the time. Trust me, Dayquil is bad for your health :P
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on October 12, 2017, 09:28:42 PM
Rush sounds WAY more awesome after a few months on HRT.
So far it has been 2112, Hemispheres, and A Farewell To Kings. (I swear the only drugs I have taken today are HRT and dayquil)
Probably that life is more awesome on HRT without all that background noise.
I'm thinking La Villa Strangiato on auto repeat for a hour or so.
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Quote from: Colleen_definitely on October 12, 2017, 09:28:42 PM
Rush sounds WAY more awesome after a few months on HRT.
So far it has been 2112, Hemispheres, and A Farewell To Kings. (I swear the only drugs I have taken today are HRT and dayquil)
I've been a rush fan for 38 years, but I have no experience with e. My favorite albums are moving pictures, grace under pressure and hold your fire. Signals and counter parts have good songs. Permanent waves too. That's a classic and their breakout album.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro
Wish I were a bird so I could fly away
Tapatalk is threatening me! It just showed an advert entitled "six weeks and your manlyhood is back for good!" What did I ever do to you, Tapatalk?
:
April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!
Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.
They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
Think outside the voice box!
Quote from: Dee Marshall on November 18, 2017, 05:30:55 PM
Tapatalk is threatening me! It just showed an advert entitled "six weeks and your manlyhood is back for good!" What did I ever do to you, Tapatalk?
:
April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!
Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.
They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
Think outside the voice box!
That's funny Dee. Tap talk doesn't like me either. It suddenly decided to email every notification.
I'm thinking I need one more post so I can get to 15 at long last. 15 posts is a very long time for someone who has very little to say like me.
I'm no longer in therapy. I haven't been for three years. When I was I was still having difficulty remembering much of my childhood. This morning I remembered an incident from about age ten. Two of the girls in my neighborhood invited me to play with them. I felt honored.
Girls and boys, when I was growing up would play games in large groups but in small groups they separated by apparent sex. In that kind of play I was always with the boys although I felt awkward and out of place. I had no idea that I was a girl at that time. In the 60's in the Midwest the concept of transgender was non-existent.
They led me behind the garage where they wanted me to drop my pants. I refused because one of my mother's friends lived across the alley and I was sure I would get caught. Denied, they chased me away.
So far that's the earliest memory I have of being sexually objectified.
:
April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!
Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.
They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
Think outside the voice box!
The last couple of days I've been thinking, I'm definitely trans. That and I only like Strictly Come Dancing for Craig's harsh criticisms (I don't like it, but my mom does). Also, November is not too early to start drinking mulled wine. Oh, and I really want a nose piercing when I start living full time, it's a requirement
Quote from: NinaW on November 19, 2017, 12:31:05 PM
The last couple of days I've been thinking, I'm definitely trans. That and I only like Strictly Come Dancing for Craig's harsh criticisms (I don't like it, but my mom does). Also, November is not too early to start drinking mulled wine. Oh, and I really want a nose piercing when I start living full time, it's a requirement
I have a nose piercing, and I'm a guy! [emoji57]
Why do I have to get out of bed? Its Sunday and I'm comfy and warm. Never mind that its 2pm!
Ryuichi
Sent from my SM-G930P using Tapatalk
Currently thinking, where can I get wip shampoo and conditioner? My mom's our of the house all day so it's the perfect opportunity to give it a wash
I've been (mentally) correcting people when they call me Sean (my male name), also when I'm grouped as part of the 'lads', 'blokes', 'boys', 'guys' or 'men'. I'm learning to hate the word 'men/man'
Quote from: Sinead on November 29, 2017, 11:45:11 AM
I've been (mentally) correcting people when they call me Sean (my male name), also when I'm grouped as part of the 'lads', 'blokes', 'boys', 'guys' or 'men'. I'm learning to hate the word 'men/man'
Maybe start correcting them...whdn you're ready to come out, that is. They'll eventually get the idea.
Why do I want instant ramen for breakfast?
Ryuichi
Sent from my SM-G930P using Tapatalk
Well it seems the last person I saw at Exeter for trans evaluation has been "let go" from the service, I can only gather for some sort of professional misconduct, from the tidbits I gathered from another staff doctor who was explaining why I wouldn't be seeing him this time.
That's not particularly encouraging. I had a feeling the sessions weren't really going anywhere and I was being "delayed". Still, if he's gone, hopefully there will be no more of that.
Two things.
Why are estradiol pills various shades of blue instead of pink?
More seriously, having my family around me eventually ended my S.A.D.; now that my family situation is shaky it's back with a vengeance!
:
April 22, 2015, the day of my first face to face pass in gender neutral clothes and no makeup. It may be months to the next one, but I'm good with that!
Being transgender is just a phase. It hardly ever starts before conception and always ends promptly at death.
They say the light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train. I say, climb aboard!
Think outside the voice box!
Should I come out? Is it too early after only two months of discovery? Should I begin hormones before telling people? Does my mom already think I might be trans? How will my brother react?
These days I'm constantly thinking about my 20 page senior capstone paper that's due next Thursday. Should be working on it, but currently working on catching uup on my Netflix shows!
Quote from: scrubcore on December 09, 2017, 03:55:38 PM
These days I'm constantly thinking about my 20 page senior capstone paper that's due next Thursday. Should be working on it, but currently working on catching uup on my Netflix shows!
Hi Scrubcore, I see that you are new here. So please let me say, Welcome To Susan's Place! Come on in and take a good look around. Perhaps I can even get you to hop on over to the
Introductions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,8.0.html) Thread and create a post to tell us a little bit more about yourself so we can get to know you a little better and greet you properly. I'll add some links and information below that can help you get more out of our site. Please take time to become familiar with them especially the RED one as we are always getting questions that are answered there.
Laurie
Global Moderator
Laurie@susans.org
Things that you should read
Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html) | Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html) | Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.) | Cautionary Note (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,82221.0.html) |
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Wondering what my neighbor's wild scheme of the week will be ::) They are always up to something, mostly trying to get me in trouble
Not sure if it's because I'm trans or what their trip is but It's always something weirdly entertaining that makes no sense LOL
I miss this place. I wish I could stay on for hours like I used to, but my job has us working so much. :)
I wonder if I can make it to over 20,000 posts within the next two years?
Quote from: King Malachite on December 19, 2017, 05:26:10 PM
I miss this place. I wish I could stay on for hours like I used to, but my job has us working so much. :)
I wonder if I can make it to over 20,000 posts within the next two years?
Hi Malachite,
I'm Laurie, a newcomer compared to you and several others here. Good to see you return after being MIA for awhile. Why wouldn't you hit 20k in two years? Sounds kinda slow to me in light of me hitting 5k in a year. I'm sure it won't take you that long to do it.
Hugs,
Laurie
Quote from: Laurie on December 20, 2017, 10:05:03 AM
Hi Malachite,
I'm Laurie, a newcomer compared to you and several others here. Good to see you return after being MIA for awhile. Why wouldn't you hit 20k in two years? Sounds kinda slow to me in light of me hitting 5k in a year. I'm sure it won't take you that long to do it.
Hugs,
Laurie
I still haven't hit 5k in like nine and a half years of being registered here. >.<
Some folks post meaningful posts while others are just full of monotonous blather
If you push hard enough, it will fall over!
Randi and I both have seasonal affective disorder so it's hard to push through it but if we just hold on a little longer it'll be January and maybe we'll be a little better.
The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.
Wonder if I could read for the rest of my life and just pretend that my problems don't exist.
Also, I wonder if girls notice me looking at them, if they do, I wonder what they think, I'm not a creep, I don't wanna get into their pants, I want to be them
I swear hair knows when it's been shaved, so it can grow back extra fast and annoying, like. But if hair is dead, how does it know?
I just shaved 4 hrs ago. Feels like bloody sandpaper already. So you've got a fast metabolism for that, but nothing else? Grrrrreat.
I'm a homeowner again?
I'm a homeowner, again!
I'm a homeowner? For the first time? There it is on the deed: Michelle Jean P...
It's her first home!
I've actually decided to stop my transition since in 7 years I've gotten nowhere with it. And surprisingly I'm ok with it.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Quote from: Michelle_P on December 22, 2017, 09:54:32 AM
I'm a homeowner again?
I'm a homeowner, again!
I'm a homeowner? For the first time? There it is on the deed: Michelle Jean P...
It's her first home!
Awesome Michelle. Must be fantastic to see her name on the deed. Great milestone. Love the positivity. [emoji106][emoji106]
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Feel like a coke addict. I just wiped all the estrogen dust out of the pill bottle with my finger. :laugh:
Dev. the Estro junkie LOL >:-)
*Runs Away*
What am I thinking? Well the same few things keep running through my mind. My roommates are mooches not all their fault atm we are a tourist village and with no snow means no money, I am the only one with an hourly job so I am taking that burden, it that has hurt me financially drained my savings again. I haven't been able to get my car fixed, missed my last 3 therapy appointments don't have anymore scheduled. And i really want to start hrt but that seems like it gets further and further away, and I am not sure if I can even afford it unless I quit my addictions. And clothes I need some clothes.
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Quote from: RavenMoon on December 22, 2017, 11:38:58 AM
I've actually decided to stop my transition since in 7 years I've gotten nowhere with it. And surprisingly I'm ok with it.
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Hey! You're from nyc too? What do you mean you got nowhere with it?
Dev, you sure it was just the bottle? Lol joking I have gone digging for pills I drop in weird places [emoji23]
Michelle, that's such a great feeling! Happy for you!
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I think I might be delving into depression eating, nearly finishing off my 2nd plate of frozen fries
Quote from: dist123 on December 23, 2017, 05:54:49 PM
Hey! You're from nyc too? What do you mean you got nowhere with it?
Yes, Staten Island. [emoji4]
Well, I was married for 10 years and got divorced back in 2011.
After I had moved into a new place, and had time alone with my thoughts, I started getting a lot of dysphoria. So I thought this might be the time.
I was a bit on the fence due to my age (I turned 60 this past November).... I wasn't nuts about being a middle aged man, so how would I feel about being a middle aged woman? I'm very vain. Lol. But a friend of mine who is fully transitioned pointed out that I'd probably regret not doing anything later in life.
The problem was I was unemployed at that point. And the divorce and getting a new apartment used up my savings.
To make a long story short, I started my own business which was keeping a roof over my head, but that's about it. Then business got slow and I got evicted. I was then homeless for two years.
Now I rent a room and was working part time (I'm a graphic artist). I left that job for a full time job in a different field and just got laid off Friday... after one week! ☹️
So I just never had the funds to even start HRT. Plus I need my facial hair removed and FFS.
At this point I'm throwing in the towel. Plus it was impossible to meet anyone to date. There's two women I sometimes go out with, but my very androgynous look always bothered them. So that's another reason.
[emoji17]
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Quote from: RavenMoon on December 24, 2017, 10:17:39 PM
Yes, Staten Island. [emoji4]
Well, I was married for 10 years and got divorced back in 2011.
After I had moved into a new place, and had time alone with my thoughts, I started getting a lot of dysphoria. So I thought this might be the time.
I was a bit on the fence due to my age (I turned 60 this past November).... I wasn't nuts about being a middle aged man, so how would I feel about being a middle aged woman? I'm very vain. Lol. But a friend of mine who is fully transitioned pointed out that I'd probably regret not doing anything later in life.
The problem was I was unemployed at that point. And the divorce and getting a new apartment used up my savings.
To make a long story short, I started my own business which was keeping a roof over my head, but that's about it. Then business got slow and I got evicted. I was then homeless for two years.
Now I rent a room and was working part time (I'm a graphic artist). I left that job for a full time job in a different field and just got laid off Friday... after one week! [emoji852]️
So I just never had the funds to even start HRT. Plus I need my facial hair removed and FFS.
At this point I'm throwing in the towel. Plus it was impossible to meet anyone to date. There's two women I sometimes go out with, but my very androgynous look always bothered them. So that's another reason.
[emoji17]
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You have to do what you feel is best for you. Have you tried 311 or the transgender law center for resources? I recently contacted them about housing because I'm worried where I'll go when I have to move in the end of January. I'll let you know when I hear from them and I can ask them about employment resources too.
I'll private message you!
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That I screwed up by coming out to my kids
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I worry too much sometimes :-\
Frankly I'm tired of the nyc trans scene. It's all fetishists and sex. Not my thing. Good thing I started transitioning a few months ago so by the time winter is gone and summer comes around I'll be a bit closer to where I wanna be in time for summer!
I don't dislike being trans but it's not what defines me either
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Sometimes I think I liked this world better when I was in a coma
Currently thinking about the band Evanescence, and just how fitting half of there songs are for Transgender people
Quote from: Christy Lee on December 30, 2017, 08:01:28 PM
Currently thinking about the band Evanescence, and just how fitting half of there songs are for Transgender people
You might also like Within Temptation. Songs like this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sCkAvh50Vs
Hi Sephirah,
I just listened to that song and then looked up the awesome lyrics. I imagine they are really appropriate to many of our members brave enough to put them into practice. For myself I'll have to admire them from a distance.
Hugs for you, sister,
Laurie
Quote from: Laurie on December 31, 2017, 04:39:51 PM
Hi Sephirah,
I just listened to that song and then looked up the awesome lyrics. I imagine they are really appropriate to many of our members brave enough to put them into practice. For myself I'll have to admire them from a distance.
Hugs for you, sister,
Laurie
That song is kind of my anthem. It's one I turn to again and again through every difficult and scary thing I've ever done, or had to go through since discovering it. For me it applies to pretty much all parts of the journey of self-discovery, as well as many other things in life. Be that coming to terms with who I am, who I can be, facing a sometimes hostile world, all the times I've wanted to hide away, or give up.
I think that every single person who questions, and dares to look inside themselves for answers... who faces the truth inside... I think they embody those lyrics. Wherever their path may lead. And that includes you, sweetie.
*hugs back*
Quote from: Sephirah on December 30, 2017, 08:10:03 PM
You might also like Within Temptation.
WOW!! That's awesome! I don't know how I've not heard of them before, but I have a new awesome band to add to my favorites! Thanks Sephirah!
So, what am I thinking? Well, Wednesday is getting closer and as such my excitement and anxiety wind up a little each day.
Not sure doctor will be giving me a supply of HRT meds so not sure what will happen. I've been reading about the pros and cons of injectable versus patches, versus pills. Today is my 1st anniversary of having quit smoking and when I was trying to quit, I tried the patches only to have them fall off.
Next in my thinking is where do I have the prescriptions filled? I start a new insurance company on the 1st and not even sure if the meds are covered by the insurance company. Next time open season comes, I'm going for Aetna which covers all the transgender related issues.
So, any suggestions on getting the meds filled? WalMart, Target, CVS, Walgreens, etc. All info is appreciated.
Cali
If you are paying for your medication out of pocket, check out Good Rx (http://www.goodrx.com). There can be a major difference in the cost of drugs and in my case, it can be as much as 4 time difference in price.
I'm thinking that I want this to be the last year I spend New Years Eve alone.
Woke up with a horrible headache today. I don't drink.
Sympathy hangover? Really?
"North, Miss Tessmacher. Due North!"
It just popped into my head. Probably the honey badgers...
Quote from: Cali on December 31, 2017, 09:51:26 PM
So, what am I thinking? Well, Wednesday is getting closer and as such my excitement and anxiety wind up a little each day.
Not sure doctor will be giving me a supply of HRT meds so not sure what will happen. I've been reading about the pros and cons of injectable versus patches, versus pills. Today is my 1st anniversary of having quit smoking and when I was trying to quit, I tried the patches only to have them fall off.
Next in my thinking is where do I have the prescriptions filled? I start a new insurance company on the 1st and not even sure if the meds are covered by the insurance company. Next time open season comes, I'm going for Aetna which covers all the transgender related issues.
So, any suggestions on getting the meds filled? WalMart, Target, CVS, Walgreens, etc. All info is appreciated.
Cali
If your insurance does not cover them, Wal-Mart still has the $4 list. Estradiol tablets (all strengths) and spironolactone 25mg at $4 for 30 tab or $10 for 90. Some states they can't sell below cost so may be higher.
Spironolactone is also one of a few drugs where it's cheaper to get multiples in the lower strengths. Two and four 25mg tabs are cheaper than a 50mg or 100mg tab.
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Quote from: Michelle_P on January 01, 2018, 10:30:42 AM
"North, Miss Tessmacher. Due North!"
It just popped into my head. Probably the honey badgers...
Michelle,
You have a condo to get moved into and get all fixed up for visitors. You have no time for wandering thoughts. Quit day dreaming and get to work.
Hugs,
Laurie
Quote from: Sephirah on December 31, 2017, 07:37:33 PM
That song is kind of my anthem. It's one I turn to again and again through every difficult and scary thing I've ever done, or had to go through since discovering it. For me it applies to pretty much all parts of the journey of self-discovery, as well as many other things in life. Be that coming to terms with who I am, who I can be, facing a sometimes hostile world, all the times I've wanted to hide away, or give up.
I think that every single person who questions, and dares to look inside themselves for answers... who faces the truth inside... I think they embody those lyrics. Wherever their path may lead. And that includes you, sweetie.
*hugs back*
Thats nice, i can relate to Evanescence and Linkin Parks stuff like that, and also more recently Imagine Dragons has become like that also, but Evanescence is the big one, its like Amy Lee gets me LOL (hence my middle name)
I always have a lot of mixed feelings coming back here. This place has an uncanny, timeless quality. That, no matter what happens in your life, when you come back here it's like you never left. I really don't know how I feel about that. Things that happened years ago are suddenly fresh in your mind. You see a post, or a message from someone you knew, and everything associated with that comes flooding back. Like the time since just never happened.
Now there are many different names, sure, but the same issues. The same torrent of emotions. The same fears, questions, milestones, triumphs. The same... Susan's Place. It's a very weird thing to try and describe. It's been nearly ten years now, since I first took the plunge and registered here. And coming back here now it's like "wait what? How long?" I see people I met right at the start, and sometimes I'll see a message or post from someone I met along the way, and the time just seems to evaporate. This site sometimes feels like it exists in its own time bubble, lol. At least for me it does.
A lot has happened since I first came here. Some good, some bad, some nightmarish. Most life-changing. I am a very, very different person to the person I was when I first joined. I don't even read my earliest posts because it's like night and day. I think I have lost a lot of what I was back then. Although back then I was practically addicted to the site. It was home. Solace. But nevertheless... I do not think I am as capable now as I was then. I think a lot of scars refuse to heal. Mentally, as well as physically. But I try. That's all we can do.
I dunno, I'm rambling. My brain is leaking, lol. I've decided to stick around for a while. Who knows, it may be good for me, being back here. One can only hope. :)
How do I deal with seeing other trans women/or just women in general when I haven't even started transitioning yet? I can't get over the feelings of jealously, even watching India Willoughby (trans news presenter) on Big Brother with my mom makes me so upset that I want to leave the room.
Also wondering how late I can get up tomorrow to go to work when I should be in bed already :D
It always amazes me, the percentage of people who possess the ability to get my screen name correct versus the percentage of individuals who are completely disrespectful and couldn't get it right if their very lives depended on it
Quote from: V M on January 06, 2018, 09:31:24 PM
It always amazes me, the percentage of people who possess the ability to get my screen name correct versus the percentage of individuals who are completely disrespectful and couldn't get it right if their very lives depended on it
Not trying to be disrespectful but I don't have a clue on the V M.
I realised I was trans on October 7th last year (yeah, I know the exact date), 3 months ago, and this is the first time in that time that I actually wished I wasn't transgender, I just want to be happy in my own skin, if I could be happy as a male - which I know is impossible, I would take it right now. The last few months have been constant ebbs and flows of being content as a male (which still knowing I'm transgender deep down) and wanting to end my life (I would never actually do so, but it actually hurts that I am not female). I know this feeling is never going away, I just wish things were easier.
I've been used a lot of crutches (alcohol, casual sex, belittling other people, eating really unhealthy) to cope with being transgender - while I wait to be referred, and while I'm trying to accept this and make reversible changes (such as laser therapy, counselling, look for wigs, dressing female and wearing women's underwear wherever possible) none of it actually works, it does distract me from the pain I'm feeling. Even if it does distract me, all it takes is seeing a beautiful female or another trans person further in their transition than me, to bring all those bad feelings back.
Feel free not to reply, I'm just ranting, just wish things were more straightforward, I know for a fact if I tried to ignore the truth of me being trans, I'd just end up hating myself more and doing further damage pyshologically
Quote from: Sinead on January 07, 2018, 04:54:02 PM
I realised I was trans on October 7th last year (yeah, I know the exact date), 3 months ago, and this is the first time in that time that I actually wished I wasn't transgender, I just want to be happy in my own skin, if I could be happy as a male - which I know is impossible, I would take it right now. The last few months have been constant ebbs and flows of being content as a male (which still knowing I'm transgender deep down) and wanting to end my life (I would never actually do so, but it actually hurts that I am not female). I know this feeling is never going away, I just wish things were easier.
I've been used a lot of crutches (alcohol, casual sex, belittling other people, eating really unhealthy) to cope with being transgender - while I wait to be referred, and while I'm trying to accept this and make reversible changes (such as laser therapy, counselling, look for wigs, dressing female and wearing women's underwear wherever possible) none of it actually works, it does distract me from the pain I'm feeling. Even if it does distract me, all it takes is seeing a beautiful female or another trans person further in their transition than me, to bring all those bad feelings back.
Feel free not to reply, I'm just ranting, just wish things were more straightforward, I know for a fact if I tried to ignore the truth of me being trans, I'd just end up hating myself more and doing further damage pyshologically
Just ranting is good for the soul, sweetie. Better out than inside, festering.
I think that's the one wish we all ultimately strive for. To be happy in our own skin. It seems such a simple thing. Something most take for granted.
I wish things were easier for you, too, Sinead. And that you weren't going through this. For what it's worth I do believe you'll get to where you want to be. And I believe in you. Hang in there, okay?
*extra big hug*
Thinking about actually doing it, starting my journey to become female, it feels good, it feels unreal still, it feels like my male tendencies are trying to fight maybe? idk but its the closest ive ever gotten, and over the past 2 weeks or so the most i have thought about actually becoming a girl..... ive been pretty obsessed with it actually
With that train of thought in mind ive been looking at woman, ie how they sit, stand, pose, sleep (sleeping positions i mean) etc and whenever i try to mimic them (In private), it just feels so right..... OMG i feel happy like genuinely happy... something i havent felt for quite along time trying to make myself feel more feminine which also makes me happy weirdly happy.....
ive also been thinking about my father, and how i felt as a child maybe he was trying to stop me from being myself? any signs he saw that i might be trans, he would try to encourage me to be more of a boy and also how that made me feel
Quote from: Christy Lee on January 11, 2018, 04:52:17 AM
Thinking about actually doing it, starting my journey to become female, it feels good, it feels unreal still, it feels like my male tendencies are trying to fight maybe? idk but its the closest ive ever gotten, and over the past 2 weeks or so the most i have thought about actually becoming a girl..... ive been pretty obsessed with it actually
With that train of thought in mind ive been looking at woman, ie how they sit, stand, pose, sleep (sleeping positions i mean) etc and whenever i try to mimic them (In private), it just feels so right..... OMG i feel happy like genuinely happy... something i havent felt for quite along time trying to make myself feel more feminine which also makes me happy weirdly happy.....
ive also been thinking about my father, and how i felt as a child maybe he was trying to stop me from being myself? any signs he saw that i might be trans, he would try to encourage me to be more of a boy and also how that made me feel
I've experienced the same feelings myself so I wish you the best.
While I enjoy my fem self in the privacy of my home, I dream of the day when I can walk the dogs, go to the store or just be me outside.
The HRT should be very supportive of this desire and goal.
Best
Cali
Quote from: Sephirah on December 31, 2017, 07:37:33 PM
That song is kind of my anthem. It's one I turn to again and again through every difficult and scary thing I've ever done, or had to go through since discovering it. For me it applies to pretty much all parts of the journey of self-discovery, as well as many other things in life. Be that coming to terms with who I am, who I can be, facing a sometimes hostile world, all the times I've wanted to hide away, or give up.
I think that every single person who questions, and dares to look inside themselves for answers... who faces the truth inside... I think they embody those lyrics. Wherever their path may lead. And that includes you, sweetie.
*hugs back*
Sorry for the late reply to this
but tonight reminded me of a song that ive always used through my self discovery, not dealing with self discovery (not wanting to deal with it), coping with grief and loss, not coping with grief and loss, ie whenever ive ever gotten too overwhelmed by it all i always go back to this song and that song is we'll actually there are 2 songs
Christina Aguilera - Hurt
Kelly Clarkson - Cry
I find them so relateable, and when i get to that overwhelmed state, i just like to use these songs to process that raw emotion and channel it to use as a coping mechanism i guess and that always seems to make me feel better but invariable then i go back to hiding heh...
Quote from: Cali on January 11, 2018, 11:27:56 AM
I've experienced the same feelings myself so I wish you the best.
While I enjoy my fem self in the privacy of my home, I dream of the day when I can walk the dogs, go to the store or just be me outside.
The HRT should be very supportive of this desire and goal.
Best
Cali
Im still at that still trying to process everything, little own to think about going out as a girl ........ i still need to tell my mum who i still live with :s to even begin to think about doing that
I want boobs. I want boobs really badly. I desperately want boobs. I need to have boobs
I truly believe that transition has made me a happier person. Life, however, has taken that as a challenge and is finding every conceivable may to upset me.
The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.
If dog's could make music, I bet it would be ska.
Tomorrow's going to be an important day. I can't make calls on my phone but it won't stop me from doing what I need to do.
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Hoping my new glasses will be ready soon
Where i could be in 5 years from now, and the many possiblilties that might stop or divert the path. Happy and sad at the same time
I'm terrible :-\ Last Sunday a neighbor was talking about how worn they were from going to church all day
So I asked them "Haveth thy butt... Lag?" I guess they didn't take to my sense of humor very well because they haven't talked to me since and just give me dirty looks
What's worse is that I think it's funny LOL
I don't think I can take being in "guy" mode anymore. People already are treating me differently- I'm only hiding from myself
That's what hurts the most honsestly. What I've done to myself by denying and surpressing my identity
Sorry for being depressing..
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Thinking about Life and obstacles that get thrown in your way
My father passed away when i was 19, i think if that didnt happen and he was still alive, i would already be a girl, but i also think i would have lost him, he has alot to do with my somewhat transphobic views that i have had which have also prevented me from becoming a girl sooner, infact if it wasnt for his transphobic views (or atleast thats the light i saw him in most of the time) i would have done it sooner than 19 i think
Because ive always kinda felt like i would not have a father cus he always seemed to discourage me from doing anything sort of girly, like if he saw me on the odd occasion if he saw me sitting down to pee, or i have very early memories of wanting to use public female toilets, not cus i was a perv, just cus it felt right (I was young, likee one of my earliest memories, i can remember an instance like it feeling right to use girls toilets), i always remember him really discouraging me from that, like it seemed like in a negative way, just he always seemed to try to encourage me to be a boy as much as he could like maybe he knew or had a feeling about me in that way?
Ive also mentioned other things in previous threads, that im thinking about which also relates to me not having done it sooner ie Other Obstacles
Quote from: Christy Lee on January 11, 2018, 04:52:17 AM
Thinking about actually doing it, starting my journey to become female, it feels good, it feels unreal still, it feels like my male tendencies are trying to fight maybe? idk but its the closest ive ever gotten, and over the past 2 weeks or so the most i have thought about actually becoming a girl..... ive been pretty obsessed with it actually
With that train of thought in mind ive been looking at woman, ie how they sit, stand, pose, sleep (sleeping positions i mean) etc and whenever i try to mimic them (In private), it just feels so right..... OMG i feel happy like genuinely happy... something i havent felt for quite along time trying to make myself feel more feminine which also makes me happy weirdly happy.....
ive also been thinking about my father, and how i felt as a child maybe he was trying to stop me from being myself? any signs he saw that i might be trans, he would try to encourage me to be more of a boy and also how that made me feel
Have you considered that maybe you already are and always have been a girl but your feelings were suppressed due to the oppression attributed to your surroundings?
Quote from: Cali on January 11, 2018, 11:27:56 AM
I've experienced the same feelings myself so I wish you the best.
While I enjoy my fem self in the privacy of my home, I dream of the day when I can walk the dogs, go to the store or just be me outside.
The HRT should be very supportive of this desire and goal.
Best
Cali
You can and will get there, we are all sisters in this together
Hugs
Quote from: V M on January 18, 2018, 06:11:04 AM
Have you considered that maybe you already are and always have been a girl but your feelings were suppressed due to the oppression attributed to your surroundings?
You can and will get there, we are all sisters in this together
Hugs
The thought, has crossed my mind
Quote from: Allison S on January 18, 2018, 02:53:08 AM
I don't think I can take being in "guy" mode anymore. People already are treating me differently- I'm only hiding from myself
That's what hurts the most honsestly. What I've done to myself by denying and surpressing my identity
Sorry for being depressing..
I know how you feel, which is why I'm going full time in the next week or so. The 2 coworkers I hadn't told (there's only 5 of us total) already figured it out anyway. Most likely a lot of others already have, too.
How are people treating you differently? Are they friendlier, more likely to chat with you? Or are they avoiding you? If the later, I can see why it would be depressing, but if it's the former, I'd say be happy! Your true self is shining through!
Quote from: Allison S on January 18, 2018, 02:53:08 AM
I don't think I can take being in "guy" mode anymore. People already are treating me differently- I'm only hiding from myself
That's what hurts the most honsestly. What I've done to myself by denying and surpressing my identity
Sorry for being depressing..
Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk
Oh, Allison! I went through that the last few months before I went full-time. Back then, I could only be myself out of the house, and when at home I had to present as male. Changing to male presentation plunged be right to the deep dark bottom of depression, and I found myself curled up on the office couch crying for a half hour or so before I got the strength to walk into the hallway with male presentation.
I'm thinking that 16 months later I am the happiest I have ever been in my adult life, and am discovering more about myself every day as I come to accept my womanhood.
Should I feel guilty for using kosher salt to season a pork chop?
Quote from: Sarah_P on January 18, 2018, 07:29:30 AM
I know how you feel, which is why I'm going full time in the next week or so. The 2 coworkers I hadn't told (there's only 5 of us total) already figured it out anyway. Most likely a lot of others already have, too.
How are people treating you differently? Are they friendlier, more likely to chat with you? Or are they avoiding you? If the later, I can see why it would be depressing, but if it's the former, I'd say be happy! Your true self is shining through!
That's great! Sounds like you're doing exactly what you need to.
And yeah they are friendlier and more polite, I think? I guess I'm the same, people/coworkers are noticing
Quote from: Michelle_P on January 18, 2018, 05:17:30 PM
Oh, Allison! I went through that the last few months before I went full-time. Back then, I could only be myself out of the house, and when at home I had to present as male. Changing to male presentation plunged be right to the deep dark bottom of depression, and I found myself curled up on the office couch crying for a half hour or so before I got the strength to walk into the hallway with male presentation.
I'm thinking that 16 months later I am the happiest I have ever been in my adult life, and am discovering more about myself every day as I come to accept my womanhood.
I know what that's like. I really don't even like makeup (it does help) much but knowing I have to go into "guy mode" is terrible. The clothes, short hair, shoes and most importantly people seeing me as a guy. It really sucks. What hurts is that this is still how I appear to people.
I'm glad to hear you're happy and moving forward in a positive way! Isn't that all we can ask for? I'm excited for what's to come for both of us [emoji4]
Quote from: V M on January 19, 2018, 01:13:24 AM
Should I feel guilty for using kosher salt to season a pork chop?
Never feel guilty for using any type of salt!
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Life is treating me well right now, just enjoying the ride [emoji4].
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Now that I'm not trying to hide myself anymore, I'm thinking of getting my ears pierced tomorrow!
Quote from: Sarah_P on January 19, 2018, 12:15:56 PM
Now that I'm not trying to hide myself anymore, I'm thinking of getting my ears pierced tomorrow!
Go for it. I have three holes in each year and wear the earrings around the house all the time. I haven't gone out with them on as yet but it's obvious that there are holes in my ears.
Thinking about what its been like it kinda feels like Christy Lee is trapped behind multiple Glass shields/doors and is smashing them one at a time to break free
But Everytime i try to tell my mum i want to be a girl and im Transgender i freeze and that voice still says NOOO What are you doing STOP!, its almost like a knee jerk reaction
Quote from: Christy Lee on January 19, 2018, 10:40:41 PM
Thinking about what its been like it kinda feels like Christy Lee is trapped behind multiple Glass shields/doors and is smashing them one at a time to break free
But Everytime i try to tell my mum i want to be a girl and im Transgender i freeze and that voice still says NOOO What are you doing STOP!, its almost like a knee jerk reaction
Christy, the glass wall feeling is one I remember well, and I've seen others use the same metaphor here.
When the need to break through comes, you'll do it when you're ready both to share it with others and take the next steps you need.
Till then, hang on in there, spend this time building your mental strength and your own understanding, so you're best placed to move forward down your road.
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Thinking that not being able to talk can be amusing. People assume that you cannot hear and that you are not intelligent.
Quote from: Cindy on January 20, 2018, 04:10:36 AM
Thinking that not being able to talk can be amusing. People assume that you cannot hear and that you are not intelligent.
Then again, when some folks like some of my neighbors do talk the same assumption can be made :laugh:
I tend to think those of few words actually think within the most depth
Quote from: Cindy on January 20, 2018, 04:10:36 AM
Thinking that not being able to talk can be amusing. People assume that you cannot hear and that you are not intelligent.
Well I've never heard you talk, even before your operations, but I certainly hold you to be very intelligent, and more than that, wise. X
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Cindy definitely has a rather high intellect
The contributions she has made to the medical field particularly cancer research are astounding not to mention her many other talents and contributions to humanity
An amazing individual she is
Hugs
Quote from: Megan. on January 20, 2018, 03:55:59 AM
Christy, the glass wall feeling is one I remember well, and I've seen others use the same metaphor here.
When the need to break through comes, you'll do it when you're ready both to share it with others and take the next steps you need.
Till then, hang on in there, spend this time building your mental strength and your own understanding, so you're best placed to move forward down your road.
Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
Thank you, i am trying my best :)
Quote from: Cindy on January 20, 2018, 04:10:36 AM
Thinking that not being able to talk can be amusing. People assume that you cannot hear and that you are not intelligent.
Ive been treated this way a few times, i find it unpleasant more than amusing
Thinking about a conversation i once had with a life long friend, this friend is quite religious/spiritual and im wondering
So ive told her im a very sarcastic person, ive also told her im asexual she sort of corrected me both times
she said
1) I dont think that really fits your personality so much maybe try not to be that way so much, it felt weird hearing that, at the time i thought its just because of who she is.. but idk now , when she said that it got me thinking about if it was something i do to keep up the facade? or was she wrong? idk
2) When i told her i was Asexual, she said i dont see that about you, i think your a sensual person, were all sensual people i think its maybe something to do with why your like how you are now something along those lines, she said she was glad that i told her but she just thinks theres something more to it, she said i just dont want to date because of my current situations (we speaking about other things as well), at the time even it got me thinking, does she maybe think i might be transgender? shes known me since i was a kid.... nothing else has been spoken about it since, i should also say this lady is also a counselor
1 more thing i should add, MUM is Asexual, worse then me i think i atleast like it sometimes, but she hates anything to do with Sex, and is ok with it, i hate it atm but im not ok with it kinda my feelings on this are complicated
Just thinking about to these conversations and all of our conversations she probably knows be best out of anybody perhaps even my mum... but she is my mums friend, which is why i havent told her, im wondering if she has a feeling about me?
The ridiculous behavior of nit pickers ... ::)
Quote from: V M on January 20, 2018, 09:36:55 PM
The ridiculous behavior of nit pickers ... ::)
What Union do they belong to?
The Local 5150 Nit Pickers Union, don't you know anything?
Quote from: V M on January 20, 2018, 11:06:23 PM
The Local 5150 Nit Pickers Union, don't you know anything?
Nooooooooooooooooooo, I don't know anything. I know something, but not anything.
I recognize the Local # 5150, that's what my shrink put in the box on my audit form.
"We're not wearing the vagina hats this year".......<crickets>
<voice in back> "We're wearing the vagina hats!!! woohoo!"
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on January 21, 2018, 03:59:57 PM
"We're not wearing the vagina hats this year".......<crickets>
<voice in back> "We're wearing the vagina hats!!! woohoo!"
?????????????????????????????????????
I wish my cat wouldn't sit down right in front of me and lick his crotch...
(https://tse2.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.kaJ9tvB5OZE0m79ph4iz-gHaHa&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300)
Quote from: V M on January 21, 2018, 08:47:19 PM
(https://tse2.mm.bing.net/th?id=OIP.kaJ9tvB5OZE0m79ph4iz-gHaHa&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300)
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thinking about growing my hair long and straight, when i use to try and do that in high school all i got was Messy and Afro
Also i never brushed my hair, so thats something im thinking about starting
I dont want to run and or hide from all of my feelings anymore
But it feels like the bubble world i have been living in for years, has become too comfortable, and im finding it hard to break free of that
I wanna play Fallout 4 now. But do I want to try it with mods since I never did that? I won't be able to unlock achievements if I do. I do like achievements. But I really wanna look at some mods. Maybe I can start a new character that uses mods. Or maybe I can just turn them on and farm achievements sometime in the future when I actually know how to play the game well.
Wait a seconds, I have homework....
I better start playing now so I have time to do homework later tonight.
Sometimes, I really question my mental state. I have a fascination with disasters. Both human-made and natural. Most of my dreams are apocalyptic, end of the world type stuff. I really have no idea why. Maybe I have a secret desire for humanity to be done with, lol. Or maybe it's some kind of mental signal to want a fresh start in something. I have no idea.
There was an advert today from one of the online shops I visit...
Two pillows, one says "I'm Weird" the other says "I love weird" ;D
Quote from: V M on January 27, 2018, 06:22:02 PM
There was an advert today from one of the online shops I visit...
Two pillows, one says "I'm Weird" the other says "I love weird" ;D
And the comforter that told them he had them covered?
Quote from: Cassi on January 27, 2018, 07:02:56 PM
And the comforter that told them he had them covered?
But if they are "weird"
throw pillows, perhaps the comforter did not have them covered.
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on January 27, 2018, 07:13:18 PM
But if they are "weird" throw pillows, perhaps the comforter did not have them covered.
Well, fine. Then the Spread said I have you covered and the comforter says nevermind :)
Quote from: Cassi on January 27, 2018, 07:14:34 PM
Well, fine. Then the Spread said I have you covered and the comforter says nevermind :)
LOL :D
(https://img.etsystatic.com/il/fdd22e/999805452/il_570xN.999805452_k1vz.jpg)
Quote from: V M on January 27, 2018, 07:20:44 PM
(https://img.etsystatic.com/il/fdd22e/999805452/il_570xN.999805452_k1vz.jpg)
ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING MY CUTE FEMINIZING BUTTUCKS OFF :)
Quote from: V M on January 27, 2018, 07:20:44 PM
(https://img.etsystatic.com/il/fdd22e/999805452/il_570xN.999805452_k1vz.jpg)
I think these two pillows are likely to engage in further "pillow talk."
So it seems...
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on January 27, 2018, 07:27:41 PM
I think these two pillows are likely to engage in further "pillow talk."
So it seems...
Really? That would be WEIRD!
Right now thinking how to further the plot line of my military sci-fi web comic that I'm currently writing. Stuck on some of the less important middle bits that I can't figure out how to make interesting.
Currently trying to find a job that pays enough and I qualify for. It's either one or the other but not both.
Thinking about how there's so much I need to do right now transition wise and everday life wise and I just have no motivation to do any of it. Somedays you just want to sit in bed and watch Netflix all day.
I'm thinking about how like five minutes ago I heard really loud yelling and stuff and I was like I wonder if those are just kids playing at like 10 at night in the city for some reason (hindsight says that was stupid :laugh:)
And then I was like uhmm are they okay tho??????
and then I saw an ambulance slowly pull up across our street like oh my goodness I hope whoever it is is okay because seriously those yells did not sound very good :-\ :-\ :-\
Quote from: Sam314 on January 27, 2018, 12:16:10 PM
I wanna play Fallout 4 now. But do I want to try it with mods since I never did that? I won't be able to unlock achievements if I do. I do like achievements. But I really wanna look at some mods. Maybe I can start a new character that uses mods. Or maybe I can just turn them on and farm achievements sometime in the future when I actually know how to play the game well.
The levels on how I relate to this statement is unreal... Boy do I love modding this game into oblivion. Pretty sure all the saves on my Xbox are corrupted just from all the mods I have.... hehe
I feel like im so close to coming out, but still feels out of reach for me currently
Thinking about my hair, growing it longer to present more female
I've pretty much have accomplished all the appointments I have had to do; Endo, shrink, lab, speech.
Now I'm back to being bored.
Too close to payday or as it was once referred to "The Day(s) The Eagle (S)hits" to do very much, lol.
Quote from: Cassi on January 29, 2018, 01:03:17 PM
I've pretty much have accomplished all the appointments I have had to do; Endo, shrink, lab, speech.
Now I'm back to being bored.
How can you possibly be bored when you are on Susan's Place Web site?
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on January 29, 2018, 01:44:08 PM
How can you possibly be bored when you are on Susan's Place Web site?
Well, if you must know, the HRT hasn't padded my skinny A$$ butt and I have to get up. Besides I think I only have 6 days of continued logging :)
Oui, peut-être
It means "Yes, possibly"
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on January 29, 2018, 01:44:08 PM
Quote from: Cassi on January 29, 2018, 01:03:17 PM
I've pretty much have accomplished all the appointments I have had to do; Endo, shrink, lab, speech.
Now I'm back to being bored.
How can you possibly be bored when you are on Susan's Place Web site?
We try to keep those conversations in the Sexuality forum... >:-)
<running away>
Quote from: Cassi on January 29, 2018, 02:18:04 PM
Well, if you must know, the HRT hasn't padded my skinny A$$ butt and I have to get up. Besides I think I only have 6 days of continued logging :)
Patience Cassi. If your timeline ticker is right, you are not "behind" schedule! :)
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on January 29, 2018, 05:10:59 PM
How can you possibly be bored when you are on Susan's Place Web site?
We try to keep those conversations in the Sexuality forum... >:-)
<running away>
Gosh Devyln, aside from your satanic leanings you are kinda becoming one of my best buddiettes!
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on January 29, 2018, 05:33:14 PM
Patience Cassi. If your timeline ticker is right, you are not "behind" schedule! :)
Not sure about that. Let's see today is the 29th, started on the 3rd so 26 days on HRT. :)
If I catch a ride to the beach I can swim out until I can swim no more then all my issues with this existance will be over
The more i think about coming out, the more being gay and even just liking men feels wrong to me again, argh why does it have to be soo confusing?
My thought process tonight?
Was i only using being gay as an excuse to feel more feminine? not so much attracted to men? but attracted to the idea of being treated like a princess by one? also like maybe i was using this as an excuse to hide from being Trans-gendered? its always felt abit wrong to think about having a boyfriend again, also my dysphoria and how much i didnt want to assume that masculine role and how i expected that woman would just expect that from me, also i thought it would be hard for Trans Woman to date Woman or if i started dating Woman and i came out as Trans they would dump me, i think somewhere along the way i thought guys would be more accepting of Trans Woman but its worse if anything there such pigs when it comes to Transgender Woman all they see is ->-bleeped-<-'s and i dont like that
*Random thoughts*
"It's not my planet monkey boy!!!" or is it?
Quote from: V M on January 30, 2018, 09:54:21 AM
*Random thoughts*
"It's not my planet monkey boy!!!" or is it?
It's my planet PRINCESS and I shall soon be its QUEEN!!!!!!
I needs cuddles but I has no cuddle monkey :-\
Quote from: V M on January 31, 2018, 07:35:34 PM
I needs cuddles but I has no cuddle monkey :-\
Try Suburban, I heard that their coming up with an auxiliary Trunk Monkey called the Bunk Monkey and Cuddle Me Elmo :)
Long pillows :)
Ah no worries, just stupid PTSD stuff
I'll be okay
Quote from: V M on January 31, 2018, 07:59:49 PM
Ah no worries, just stupid PTSD stuff
I'll be okay
You better or I'll send Laurie after you! You know she was a sailor, right?
Worsening the situation wasn't actually part of the plan
Quote from: V M on January 31, 2018, 08:06:06 PM
Worsening the situation wasn't actually part of the plan
Okay, I'm bad. I'll go to my room :(
No you're not bad, I'm just in a funk
It'll be okay
Quote from: V M on January 31, 2018, 08:34:23 PM
No you're not bad, I'm just in a funk
It'll be okay
Maybe you should get comfy and watch again one of your all-time favorite movies.
Then try to get a good night's sleep.
In the morning, the funk may be replaced by a refreshed spirit and you will find a way to make it a really good day. Brighten up someone's day, that thoughtfulness can often find a way to give you a good feeling too.
Chrissy
Quote from: V M on January 31, 2018, 08:34:23 PM
No you're not bad, I'm just in a funk
It'll be okay
Ok, thanks - Sweet dreams
Boringly self absorbed people well, bore me
I'm more annoyed that the online scheduling for my therapist's office isn't letting me log in! It's not an emergency but I want to reschedule my appointment I have this week but I may just have to move other stuff around that day.
Also I think I'll discuss more in depth with her about HRT because I can't wait to start it and if I'm found out, I'm at the point I just don't care anymore if people know. If my parents find out... That's fine. I'm looking for a new job anyway and have money saved away to afford a month or two of bills/rent.
Also work is boring today but it is 28 days of Black Cosplay! Which is an event that was started to honor and showcase Black Cosplayers during Black History Month!! And I'm loving being able to help show all my friends these amazing creators and artists.
Quote from: AgentVermont052 on February 03, 2018, 07:08:31 PM
Also work is boring today but it is 28 days of Black Cosplay! Which is an event that was started to honor and showcase Black Cosplayers during Black History Month!! And I'm loving being able to help show all my friends these amazing creators and artists.
Are you putting together any outfits for Black Cosplay? I'm as pale as a piece of paper but I would love to cosplay as mohawk Storm.
(https://pre00.deviantart.net/2725/th/pre/i/2015/289/0/0/mohawk_storm_by_peter_v_nguyen-d9dalva.jpg)
Quote from: V M on February 03, 2018, 06:29:00 PM
Boringly self absorbed people well, bore me
Boring, self-absorbed people, do you mean like Spounge Bob?
Quote from: Cassi on February 03, 2018, 09:09:07 PM
Boring, self-absorbed people, do you mean like Spounge Bob?
LOL :D
Sometimes I think "Big Foot", "Sasquatch" and a few others are just crusty old Marine Corps and SEAL snipers who are just too dysfunctional, reclusive and far too attached to their ghillie suits
Quote from: V M on February 03, 2018, 09:26:40 PM
Sometimes I think "Big Foot", "Sasquatch" and a few others are just crusty old Marine Corps and SEAL snipers who are just too dysfunctional, reclusive and far too attached to their ghillie suits
Yep!
Quote from: PollyQMcLovely on February 03, 2018, 07:37:18 PM
Are you putting together any outfits for Black Cosplay? I'm as pale as a piece of paper but I would love to cosplay as mohawk Storm.
(https://pre00.deviantart.net/2725/th/pre/i/2015/289/0/0/mohawk_storm_by_peter_v_nguyen-d9dalva.jpg)
No, I'm white actually heh. So I won't be cosplaying. I actually don't cosplay anymore, but I love following all my friends that still do!! And this month/event in the cosplay community is always fun to discover new cosplayers of color to follow <3
Night shift is too long and past my bed time for me to enjoy. Even if I'm just watching tv and babysitty grown children
Not looking forward going home, uniform is not made for night. Even an Australian summer night, will be a little to fresh at that time of night.
Should make more of an effort to come on here more often but I'm trying to be responsible at work, and life keeps calling me for other duties. (One benefit of the night shift, free susans time)
Having great friends in my life that don't judge me in anyway.They are good to me to this day with their support.Say I am much calmer as a fulltime crossdresser and they love being around Zoey.They have so many memories of me crossdressing in the past.One is my good long time friend Allie,would go through her closet and try on her clothing.
Quote from: Miss Zoey on February 08, 2018, 05:38:43 AM
Having great friends in my life that don't judge me in anyway.They are good to me to this day with their support.Say I am much calmer as a fulltime crossdresser and they love being around Zoey.They have so many memories of me crossdressing in the past.One is my good long time friend Allie,would go through her closet and try on her clothing.
That is nice to have good friends like that, and to be calm!
Chrissy
*Rests elbow on armrest and leans over with a smile*
Dirty little thoughts that only I could know >:-)
How incredibily lonely I've always been
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Quote from: Allison S on February 08, 2018, 10:44:01 PM
How incredibily lonely I've always been
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You and me both, that's why we all need to be here for each other
Hugs
Quit reading those romance novels :)
Quote from: Cassi on February 08, 2018, 11:23:49 PM
Quit reading those romance novels :)
I consider them research materials. ;D
Quote from: Allison S on February 08, 2018, 10:44:01 PM
How incredibily lonely I've always been
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I know that feeling
Quote from: Christy Lee on February 09, 2018, 12:03:15 AM
I know that feeling
Quote from: V M on February 08, 2018, 10:50:15 PM
You and me both, that's why we all need to be here for each other
Hugs
Love you all [emoji173] yes I cried over this and it felt good to
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Why does wrong sometimes feel so right
Quote from: Shambles on February 10, 2018, 06:23:45 PM
Why does wrong sometimes feel so right
What's WRONG?????
Thinking about my late father and how i sometimes use to get a Transphobic vibe from him, his gone now but i know that he would never have accepted me as his daughter, sometimes i feel like he is a big reason why i have been/still am so scared to transition his gone as i said but the impression he left lingers
If it wasnt for this vibe i think i would already be a girl now .....
I heard yesterday my father who I haven't spoken to since 2009 has some kind of blood cancer. We don't get along and all his kids have grown up and distanced themselves from him so I know it's not just me. But I guess I will have to call him at some point. It's not going be fun.
That I really don't give a flying you know what anymore
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Quote from: Allison S on February 11, 2018, 09:29:28 PM
That I really don't give a flying you know what anymore
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Okay, let's sit down and discuss this.
Pancake day tomorow!
Quote from: Cassi on February 11, 2018, 09:32:58 PM
Okay, let's sit down and discuss this.
Thank you Cassi [emoji173] I'm with my mom and sister today. My sister knows I'm transitioning. I'm dropping hints for my mom. I don't want to see my mom hurt by me, but I know I need to ease this on her slowly.
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Quote from: Allison S on February 12, 2018, 12:46:41 PM
Thank you Cassi [emoji173] I'm with my mom and sister today. My sister knows I'm transitioning. I'm dropping hints for my mom. I don't want to see my mom hurt by me, but I know I need to ease this on her slowly.
Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk
Okay Sweetie, you're welcome. Let me know
Today is my first day doing some volunteer technical theatre work for a local community musical and I'm so nervous. There are at least three people I was close to in High School and haven't seen in almost a decade that will be there. I've only been out on social media for two months. Please just let them all gender me correctly. Pleaseeeeee.
My sister suggested that I present female only at night. I really can't deal with other people's emotions right now. I know what I have to do so I can make it. Wish me luck I know we all need it.
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Quote from: Allison S on February 13, 2018, 12:19:11 PM
My sister suggested that I present female only at night. I really can't deal with other people's emotions right now. I know what I have to do so I can make it. Wish me luck I know we all need it.
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Maybe your sister is into Vampires?
Quote from: Cassi on February 13, 2018, 12:30:11 PM
Maybe your sister is into Vampires?
[emoji23] she just might be! Hahaha
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If one base's their opinions on gossip and rumored hearsay then they will never know the truth
Quote from: V M on February 14, 2018, 08:41:51 PM
If one base's their opinions on gossip and rumored hearsay then they will never know the truth
Individuals who base their opinions on gossip, rumors and hearsay, don't want to know the truth!
Quote from: Cassi on February 14, 2018, 10:15:54 PM
Individuals who base their opinions on gossip, rumors and hearsay, don't want to know the truth!
LOL... No schnickies... right?
Just found that there's a new Stargate series called Stargate Origins which I'm going to walk thru my gate and watch.
Quote from: Cassi on February 14, 2018, 10:15:54 PM
Individuals who base their opinions on gossip, rumors and hearsay, don't want to know the truth!
They may not be able to recognize the truth, or accept it.
Quote from: ChrissyRyan on February 14, 2018, 10:44:43 PM
They may not be able to recognize the truth, or accept it.
That's the TRUTH! :)
Airports need arcades and skee ball machines
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on February 15, 2018, 11:37:12 AM
Airports need arcades and skee ball machines
Las Vegas airport has slot machines at least...
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on February 15, 2018, 11:37:12 AM
Airports need arcades and skee ball machines
That would be awesome! At the very least it would be far more entertaining than either the 'standing in line' ride, or the 'get groped by TSA' booth.
Quote from: Sarah_P on February 15, 2018, 05:35:41 PM
That would be awesome! At the very least it would be far more entertaining than either the 'standing in line' ride, or the 'get groped by TSA' booth.
There is always the way overpriced food booths and the relaxing hour or more wait because you didn't know how long it would take to get groped.
Or the even longer one ending in a cancelled flight >:(
Like mine today
Now if I were stuck in Milwaukee I wouldn't be so mad, that airport has an amazing book store in it. Not one of the glorified newspaper stands like you normally see, a real honest to goodness book store with everything imaginable in it including rare and antique books.
Quote from: Sarah_P on February 15, 2018, 05:35:41 PM
That would be awesome! At the very least it would be far more entertaining than either the 'standing in line' ride, or the 'get groped by TSA' booth.
Some people say they don't mind or even enjoy the standing in line and getting groped :-\ Makes me wonder if that's the only form of intimacy they've ever experienced?
Quote from: V M on February 15, 2018, 07:16:11 PM
Some people say they don't mind or even enjoy the standing in line and getting groped :-\ Makes me wonder if that's the only form of intimacy they've ever experienced?
Probably. I'm sure there are people who actually are hoping for the groping...
You could always do what a friend of mine does and end any pat down with a line like "wow, you were great, can we do that again?" then wink or blow a kiss.
He's an odd one, but in an amusing sort of way.
Oh, awe, *Bit of Panting* Yes, Yes, Yes!!! Thank you, I can't wait to get back in line >:-)
And here I thought you awl were talk'n bout the DM of V!
Uh oh, The Dr. Phil Show just came on :o Imma, change the channel
Quote from: V M on February 17, 2018, 01:43:08 AM
Uh oh, The Dr. Phil Show just came on :o Imma, change the channel
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, what out, Idda will change it back :)
Am I the only that goes to bed early sometimes because I really want my morning coffee?.
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I'm wondering who will look after my Iguana after I'm gone or if there even is anyone who would actually know how to
Quote from: V M on February 19, 2018, 02:47:04 AM
I'm wondering who will look after my Iguana after I'm gone or if there even is anyone who would actually know how to
Do it like they did in the olden days, take it with you :)
Better yet, quit thinking such foolishness as being gone!!!!!
Actually, my niece had two and still has one and it's the pits sharing the shower when I visit.
Thinking about my bad hand now, and I my energetic past. I believe.. ..
(Most) Broken bones are annoying
Pulling muscles can be a hassle
Tendons, well that kept me on crutches for at least two years
Nerve damage. Now nerve damage, this is a pain I would not wish on my own worse enemy
I'm thinking I want a bottle of wine to go with my pizza and Lord of the rings film.
I'll always be nerdy but I hope I won't always be overweight
What about second breakfast? Elevensies?
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Quote from: TonyaW on February 22, 2018, 02:07:29 PM
What about second breakfast? Elevensies?
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Second Breakfast is always my favorite
That my boss is in for a bloody shock when I report discrimination to his boss next week
I've been feeling what can only be described as internalised transphobia recently, especially when doing something related to being trans, it's caught me by surprise, but I'm not going to let it stop me from progressing with my transition :)
Quote from: CallMeKatie on February 22, 2018, 01:15:28 PM
I'm thinking I want a bottle of wine to go with my pizza and Lord of the rings film.
I'll always be nerdy but I hope I won't always be overweight
I love both of your vices. You care so you will be fine.
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I'm so happy that I get to sit through mandatory training to teach me the following:
Looking at pornography at work is not OK, despite being taught my entire life to share.
Being a racist at work is still not OK.
Pressuring a subordinate into a date is still not OK.
Having sex at work, still not OK.
Promoting the person you're bumping uglies with is still not OK.
Firing somebody because they don't want to bump uglies with you is also not OK.
Why can't forcing employees to sit through insulting liability reducing training be considered harassment?
I'm thinking in about 45 more replies V M is going to play the trump card in the SWAG thread: "Locked!" ;D :laugh: 8)
Let's play fair Dev... ::)
Oh, I'm thinking Ricotta cheese be good breasts food ;D
Devyln!
Are you insinuating that VM would take the thread and go home :()
Quote from: SueNZ on February 26, 2018, 02:32:11 AM
I love both of your vices. You care so you will be fine.
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OMG, Katie! Pizza is for beer only!!!!! If you want wine, go for sushi :(
Quote from: Cassi on March 04, 2018, 02:41:58 PM
Devyln!
Are you insinuating that VM would take the thread and go home :()
[Joe Friday]Just the facts, ma'am[/Joe Friday] :laugh:
Standard Operating Procedure to close threads at 2,000 posts and start a new one, V M is on now, I'm just speculatin', that's all. ;D
Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 04, 2018, 02:51:56 PM
[Joe Friday]Just the facts, ma'am[/Joe Friday] :laugh:
Standard Operating Procedure to close threads at 2,000 posts and start a new one, V M is on now, I'm just speculatin', that's all. ;D
Hugs, Devlyn
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
I don't want to feel pressured to be 'feminine' or act a certain way as a trans woman, I just want to be female
That all things are possible in an infinite universe.
"Is it a boy or girl?" a random guy says in Arabic. Little does he know, I speak it. I guess 5 months on hrt I ought to confuse some...
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Quote from: Allison S on March 08, 2018, 04:20:39 PM
"Is it a boy or girl?" a random guy says in Arabic. Little does he know, I speak it. I guess 5 months on hrt I ought to confuse some...
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يجب أن قلت أنك واحدة من 70 عذارى !!!!!
Quote from: Cassi on March 08, 2018, 04:22:42 PM
يجب أن قلت أنك واحدة من 70 عذارى !!!!!
[emoji6] can't read or write it sadly but I got you thanks to google translate lol
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Just got back from my first ever WI (womens insitute) meeting. A huge group of friendly and warm women. I was very nervous going in beforehand, but soon felt relaxed and welcomed. A wonderful vibe to the evening [emoji5].
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Quote from: Allison S on March 08, 2018, 04:26:56 PM
[emoji6] can't read or write it sadly but I got you thanks to google translate lol
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Google Translate is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo awesome!
Quote from: Megan. on March 08, 2018, 05:05:19 PM
Just got back from my first ever WI (womens insitute) meeting. A huge group of friendly and warm women. I was very nervous going in beforehand, but soon felt relaxed and welcomed. A wonderful vibe to the evening [emoji5].
Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk
So, ventured out to see if I could connect with other transisters here in the Vegas area and went to what's called "The Center" which is Vegas's LBGT place.
Honestly felt so out of place there.
I don't feel pretty today [emoji17]
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Well, get your happy mode in gear and be pretty!!!!!
Quote from: Allison S on March 10, 2018, 12:05:37 PM
I don't feel pretty today [emoji17]
Well, you are whether you feel like it or not!
Well I'm thinking:
Damn! I'm going to lose an hour's sleep because of this Daylight Stealing Time.
Oh, wait a minute - I don't work! Nevermind :(
Quote from: Sarah_P on March 10, 2018, 11:53:16 PM
Well, you are whether you feel like it or not!
Self doubt really stinks.. I Iike your attitude a lot better [emoji4] thank you!
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Should I be wondering why a great pizza (not the fluffy cheese on toast with extras), should not be accompanied by a Chianti or a nice Montepulciano.?
Rowan
I love how my 6 year old son still uses his please's and thank you's when taking to my Alexa device. [emoji23]
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So i told mum i was thinking of growing my hair out today, and she didnt say anything at all
felt abit weird telling her that tho, have had it short for along time
Quote from: Cassi on March 11, 2018, 12:02:25 AM
Well I'm thinking:
Damn! I'm going to lose an hour's sleep because of this Daylight Stealing Time.
Oh, wait a minute - I don't work! Nevermind :(
As I wander about the house changing the time on various appliances and such I keep asking myself "why did I leave Arizona?"
I'm thinking why is it that people can send you PMs on here whilst having you on a block list. This allows them to send snarky messages without being replied to. Or perhaps they are able to temporarily unblock a person, send them a message and then quickly block them again like some sort of child. I'd figure the block system might be best on a timer so they can't do this.
Quote from: Kylo on March 11, 2018, 10:12:02 AM
I'm thinking why is it that people can send you PMs on here whilst having you on a block list. This allows them to send snarky messages without being replied to. Or perhaps they are able to temporarily unblock a person, send them a message and then quickly block them again like some sort of child. I'd figure the block system might be best on a timer so they can't do this.
If they block you, there is no reason you can't block them. If somebody is abusing the PM system, use the report to aministrater button on the right of the PM and report it to Cindy or Susan. The TOS still apply in PM and there is no reason for you to be mistreated even in PM. PMs are for things you don't want to say in public and not for things you shouldn't say in public.
Quote from: Megan. on March 11, 2018, 05:34:45 AM
I love how my 6 year old son still uses his please's and thank you's when taking to my Alexa device. [emoji23]
That's adorable!! :laugh:
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on March 11, 2018, 09:38:33 AM
As I wander about the house changing the time on various appliances and such I keep asking myself "why did I leave Arizona?"
I really wish the US would do away with daylight savings completely. It's totally redundant now.
Quote from: Megan. on March 11, 2018, 05:34:45 AM
I love how my 6 year old son still uses his please's and thank you's when taking to my Alexa device. [emoji23]
The etiquette is strong in this one. ;D
Hugs, Devlyn
Shouldn't making an exchange be a bit easier? I mean like parts is parts right?
Quote from: V M on March 12, 2018, 11:17:25 PM
Shouldn't making an exchange be a bit easier? I mean like parts is parts right?
I always have problems exchanging my volkswagon parts for BMW ones.
I hate being landlocked, I must return to the ocean and play guitar and go surfing even if it kills me
Quote from: V M on March 14, 2018, 11:36:29 AM
I hate being landlocked, I must return to the ocean and play guitar and go surfing even if it kills me
Find a pond, Amy!
What did I eat that made me so gassy tonight? [emoji29]
Ryuichi
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Quote from: Ryuichi13 on March 14, 2018, 11:16:24 PM
What did I eat that made me so gassy tonight? [emoji29]
Ryuichi
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Hummmm, Well....................I do remember you texting something about a Hamburger :)
Go home people, it's very late at night and I would like to be able to close before I have to close. Please, pretty please with sugar on top
Quote from: immortal gypsy on March 15, 2018, 06:27:10 AM
Go home people, it's very late at night and I would like to be able to close before I have to close. Please, pretty please with sugar on top
Late? Its 9:52am where I am! [emoji57]
Ryuichi
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TOGA, TOGA, TOGA...............................
IDES OF MARCH.......................................
SOOTHSAYER...........................................
BRUTUS....................................................
JULIUS.....................................................
BACK STABBER............................................
Thinking about that leftover corned beef.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 17, 2018, 08:12:09 PM
Thinking about that leftover corned beef.
I'll take some ;D
Quote from: V M on March 17, 2018, 08:42:28 PM
I'll take some ;D
That's why you always buy a bigger brisket than you think you need, everyone loves corned beef. ;D
Tomorrow they'll be on sale for twelve cents a pound, I like to grab an extra one for another time.
Hugs, Devlyn
That's what I'm waiting for and to make corned beef hash. Hormel's canned CBH is almost as much as gold :)
When it comes to hash, I really prefer the canned. Acquired taste, I'm sure.
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 17, 2018, 08:53:33 PM
When it comes to hash, I really prefer the canned. Acquired taste, I'm sure.
I've never made it so it will be one of the"Experiments In Terror",
I think I double dosed on my estrogen because I was with family and forgot/didn't pay attention. Oops.
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Quote from: Allison S on March 17, 2018, 11:21:57 PM
I think I double dosed on my estrogen because I was with family and forgot/didn't pay attention. Oops.
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Okay Alli, you'll probably be busted. I meant breasted :)
https://www.allrecipes.com/video/2615/corned-beef-hash/
I need more deeper connections with trans people like myself.
Quote from: Cassi on March 18, 2018, 12:44:58 PM
Okay Alli, you'll probably be busted. I meant breasted :)
If only!! Lol
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I'm thinking that it's been a wild weekend for this old broad and I need some serious beauty sleep :)
Why am I awake after only 2 hours of sleep? I should put down the phone and do some more snoozing....zzzzzzz [emoji25]
Ryuichi
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I'm thinking about how odd it can be to simultaneously feel like I'm losing something while feeling like I'm gaining the world as my transition moves along.
Why am I not more disturbed at finding out a new client clocked me at our very first session?
The spy who came in from the cold in the War Between the Sexes.
Why do people at the home office get snow days while I don't?
Why did my alarm not go off this morning? At least I woke up in time to scramble & get to for work on time.
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on March 22, 2018, 09:57:33 AM
Why do people at the home office get snow days while I don't?
Same reason salaried people often get days of with pay and hourly people either work or go broke :(
Quote from: Cassi on March 22, 2018, 11:45:17 AM
Same reason salaried people often get days of with pay and hourly people either work or go broke :(
Or when we salary people work 60-70 hour weeks with no overtime :-\
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on March 22, 2018, 04:02:59 PM
Or when we salary people work 60-70 hour weeks with no overtime :-\
Colleen: Exactly correct. This subject is dear to my heart for various reasons.
Before I started my own business I was a mid-level salaried executive at a corporation.... I worked at least 60 hours a week, sometimes more, and I worked sometimes over the weekend ... some Saturday's and even Sundays.
Now that I am self-employed, I am still working 60+ hours a week or more plus some weekends, and there is no set salary, no set set hourly wage, no overtime, no holiday pay, and there is no unemployment insurance, no pension plan, no paid sick days, no paid vacation .... I don't have to rely on decisions made by others. More risk, perhaps more reward.
But that is the way I like it....
Danielle
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on March 22, 2018, 04:29:05 PM
But that is the way I like it....
Danielle
Yes!!! [emoji122]
Why are guys staring?? Like they don't even try to hide it
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Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on March 22, 2018, 04:29:05 PM
But that is the way I like it....
Danielle
Being the mistress of your own destiny is definitely appealing.
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on March 22, 2018, 05:24:20 PM
Being the master of your own destiny is definitely appealing.
Mistress, Colleen, Mistress :)
I'm still new to this!
doh
I'm thinking, like how is Colleen reading my mind???????
I'm creepy like that ;D
Reading through all of the information about transformation from beginning to end. My future new life and happiness. But the costs how I will pay for all of this and whether my family will accept me. I had five brothers one passed on early but I was the middle boy. Yes give boys. After years of drinking covering this up, I came home and brought my dysfunctional back together. Now I might be what breaks them apart again. This all seems crazy. I'm almost finished with my M.B.A so in time it could happen and the bright side is I have no friends because I never got in. This is what's on my mind besides finding a new dress, lingerie and shoes with nowhere to wear them. Thanks for askin!
Quote from: Corrina on March 22, 2018, 06:54:59 PM
Reading through all of the information about transformation from beginning to end. My future new life and happiness. But the costs how I will pay for all of this and whether my family will accept me. I had five brothers one passed on early but I was the middle boy. Yes give boys. After years of drinking covering this up, I came home and brought my dysfunctional back together. Now I might be what breaks them apart again. This all seems crazy. I'm almost finished with my M.B.A so in time it could happen and the bright side is I have no friends because I never got in. This is what's on my mind besides finding a new dress, lingerie and shoes with nowhere to wear them. Thanks for askin!
Congrats on almost finishing your M.B.A.! I know it's no place for me to say this, but you shouldn't
really care what the cost is.. it's important to know how you'll pay and at the same time it's even more important to get the help you need. A lot of doctors, specialists and even labs do have options for a payment plan that works for you. Healthcare expsenses is daunting for everyone, don't let it stop you!!
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I don't think the costs are what is really bothering me as much as my family. I have a Gay Aunt and Gay Cousin and they are accepted with joy. I have been my moms only son to actually come home and do anything to help her. My Dad passed away and one brother is married and lives in Washington, one is the town drunk and the other is now living his life. We all talk and get together on holidays. Before none of us spoke. Again I could be the outcast. Other than that I don't live for popular opinion or what the general population thinks. Thanks for encouragement, Allison S
Well, I'm kinda glad this thread is here because in my wondering/wandering thoughts the question of past life experiences came up to me. I really haven't seen anything related to this posted on site and thought this will convince everyone I'm tootally (intentional misspeel) bonkers.
From what little I know, could, somehow our previous life be connected to our DNA. That is if it really happens?
Just thinking weird thoughts out loud :
I don't enjoy clearing up after my friend leaving a trail of obsessed and jilted females in his wake. Why do they come to me lamenting about his behavior and him always disappearing for months on end? I'm not his keeper, ladies. Should take a hint: he's about as reliable as a wax fireguard.
Quote from: Kylo on March 22, 2018, 09:56:59 PM
I don't enjoy clearing up after my friend leaving a trail of obsessed and jilted females in his wake. Why do they come to me lamenting about his behavior and him always disappearing for months on end? I'm not his keeper, ladies. Should take a hint: he's about as reliable as a wax fireguard.
Sounds like he might be hot lol but yeah, not your problem!! I can't believe women actually are obsessed with this guy though .. there's so many others out there!!
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If life in this existence sucked any harder the planet would probably implode
Quote from: V M on March 23, 2018, 12:56:40 AM
If life in this existence sucked any harder the planet would probably implode
So, can we expect a Black Hole to develop in the near future?
Quote from: Cassi on March 23, 2018, 12:58:31 AM
So, can we expect a Black Hole to develop in the near future?
Yes, a noticeable void
Quote from: V M on March 23, 2018, 01:00:40 AM
Yes, a noticeable void
Yikes, a kind of bend over and kiss your keester goodbye type of void? Noooooooooooooooooooooo
On another matter, I'm thinking when I look at my avatar it's blowing me away that it's me. No FaceApp or other program other than cropping.
Kind of cool that I really don't look too bald and it's all my own hair. Maybe, with some weight loss I'll be okay. :)
Quote from: Cassi on March 23, 2018, 01:04:32 AM
Yikes, a kind of bend over and kiss your keester goodbye type of void? Noooooooooooooooooooooo
I'm not quite that limber anymore
Quote from: Cassi on March 23, 2018, 01:07:03 AM
On another matter, I'm thinking when I look at my avatar it's blowing me away that it's me. No FaceApp or other program other than cropping.
Kind of cool that I really don't look too bald and it's all my own hair. Maybe, with some weight loss I'll be okay. :)
You look good! Keep up what you're doing
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Quote from: V M on March 23, 2018, 01:31:15 AM
I'm not quite that limber anymore
LOL. If I'm wearing shoes with a slight heel I can bend down but getting up is another story.
Quote from: Allison S on March 23, 2018, 01:44:35 AM
You look good! Keep up what you're doing
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Thank you Allison,
Trying to get things together mentally and work on the physical :)
Sometimes it amazes me how thoughtless and hurtful some people can be at times, but I suppose that's their problem not mine
(https://i.imgur.com/IUY6Jle.jpg)
Quote from: Faith on March 23, 2018, 07:27:39 AM
(https://i.imgur.com/IUY6Jle.jpg)
OMG!!! That's the exact position and expression
Thinking about going to Tampa for the Canna Conference for new cannabis related business ventures here in Florida. Might go if we don't hit the beach here :) Life is tough eh ? I am blessed !!! Thinking of how to make my baby boo smile when she gets home from work. I am retired and do the house mouse thang here :)
And of course.
http://mcgs.bcbsfl.com/?doc=Gender%20Reassignment%20Surgery
Quote from: Allison S on March 22, 2018, 10:19:08 PM
Sounds like he might be hot lol but yeah, not your problem!! I can't believe women actually are obsessed with this guy though .. there's so many others out there!!
He is one of those rare charismatic characters who makes everyone feel "understood" and like they're found a kindred spirit whatever gender they are. So broken hearts everywhere he goes. Everyone has a flip side though, and his is buggering off into the blue without warning or chatting up everyone he possibly can. He's befriended everyone I know and tried to chat up any and all of them of the female persuasion. I'd recommend someone else to them for sure lol.
Quote from: V M on March 23, 2018, 02:12:26 AM
Sometimes it amazes me how thoughtless and hurtful some people can be at times, but I suppose that's their problem not mine
Sorry to hear that. Hopefully you weren't referring to me :(
Quote from: Kylo on March 23, 2018, 09:41:16 AM
He is one of those rare charismatic characters who makes everyone feel "understood" and like they're found a kindred spirit whatever gender they are. So broken hearts everywhere he goes. Everyone has a flip side though, and his is buggering off into the blue without warning or chatting up everyone he possibly can. He's befriended everyone I know and tried to chat up any and all of them of the female persuasion. I'd recommend someone else to them for sure lol.
What?! Sounds like a guy I would not walk but run from! I mean, if I knew he does this. I'm suspicious of men though in general
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Sounds more like he's going to end up leading a cult.
The night time is the right time, the night time is the right time
Quote from: Colleen_definitely on March 23, 2018, 04:33:04 PM
The night time is the right time, the night time is the right time
Past my bedtime......................................la la la :)
I need to have ffs for my sanity [emoji17]
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I have to be sane for my ffs :)
You're sane enough? Lol
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Quote from: Allison S on March 24, 2018, 12:21:55 AM
You're sane enough? Lol
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And my dear, what voices told you that??????? :)
BTW, what I see of your lips, nose and left eye - eye like :)
Why did I watch that movie? It was bloody, predictable and I've seen SO many similar ones that were better. Was it because it was like watching a train wreck, that I just couldn't look away? [emoji17]
I should have tried to write instead.
Ryuichi
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Quote from: Cassi on March 23, 2018, 11:35:03 AM
Sorry to hear that. Hopefully you weren't referring to me :(
Actually the world revolves around the sun and neither of us really have much of an affect upon that
Quote from: Cassi on March 24, 2018, 12:25:09 AM
And my dear, what voices told you that??????? :)
BTW, what I see of your lips, nose and left eye - eye like :)
Lol that's the point.. when I have ffs my whole face would be in the shot
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Hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
A swirling mass of indiscriminate numbers. Maybe my brain is trying to work something out.
Feeling down after being misgendered a few times today... I wanna eat everything in sight to feel better but my stomachs too full right now. The slice of pizza I ordered was filled with chicken and I didn't even finish it.. It's crazy to think I might never pass because I can't take this
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Quote from: Allison S on March 24, 2018, 05:02:25 PM
Feeling down after being misgendered a few times today... I wanna eat everything in sight to feel better but my stomachs too full right now. The slice of pizza I ordered was filled with chicken and I didn't even finish it.. It's crazy to think I might never pass because I can't take this
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One Step, One Foot, One Day at a time little sister!
Sometimes it's nice having a day not focusing on being transgender, or all of the insecurities and feelings attached to it. Today I'm having a 'duvet day' catching up on a month's worth of Hollyoaks and drinking several cups of Earl Grey :)
Quote from: Sinead on March 25, 2018, 10:17:25 AM
Sometimes it's nice having a day not focusing on being transgender, or all of the insecurities and feelings attached to it. Today I'm having a 'duvet day' catching up on a month's worth of Hollyoaks and drinking several cups of Earl Grey :)
What????? Not in church??????????????????????
:)
Hollyoaks?? Is Tony still in it, as he's been there since I was in school, haha!
Back on topic, partner catching this bug from my daughter, and both feeling worse for wear today.
Quote from: Cassi on March 25, 2018, 02:30:06 PM
What????? Not in church??????????????????????
:)
I'm going to hell for sure :P
Quote from: Rumples on March 25, 2018, 03:41:22 PM
Hollyoaks?? Is Tony still in it, as he's been there since I was in school, haha!
Back on topic, partner catching this bug from my daughter, and both feeling worse for wear today.
Yeah, he is. I think they'll cancel Hollyoaks when he leaves, lol
Well, I wouldn't go that far, Limbo, Purgatory maybe, but not hell :)
I'm thinking a Blue Laws Thread would be cool
I was thinking about anti-aging/reverse aging technology, and whether my generation will be able to benefit from it. I like being in my 20s, and I am sad that it will come to an end in the year 2025, which is not that far away imo. Hopefully by the time I am 40 they will come out with that fountain of youth pill or injection. There is actually a live stream that talks about reverse aging, which makes me hopeful for the future.
Here is the live stream if anyone is interested. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNjpsQorvco
it might be a bit silly for someone in their early 20s to be thinking about this stuff but I do it quite often. I suppose none of this really matters though, as someday I will die and when I do I will forget that I ever existed in the first place. Life truly is pointless but then again there is nothing wrong with a bit of pointless fun.
Tall, 22, and handsome seems to be the guys tonight messaging me. It's all very fleeting and some just want sex. Which I don't really want. There was one muscular tall guy who really wanted to meet for months. I never did because I felt insecure. Now I'm thinking I may not care anymore?
Hmm I think they're mostly bi/pansexual but I still feel like I'm no where near done transitioning yet. They may just have to wait lol
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I'm thinking that I'm not as beautiful as most of you ladies and need more beauty sleep to catch up so with that,
SWEET DREAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't remember?
Quote from: Allison S on March 28, 2018, 11:11:53 PM
Tall, 22, and handsome seems to be the guys tonight messaging me. It's all very fleeting and some just want sex. Which I don't really want. There was one muscular tall guy who really wanted to meet for months. I never did because I felt insecure. Now I'm thinking I may not care anymore?
Hmm I think they're mostly bi/pansexual but I still feel like I'm no where near done transitioning yet. They may just have to wait lol
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@ Allison: Exciting and frightening all at the same time is how I feel about my male suitors... now I have 3.
A word of caution ... my Dad told me this when I was a teenager:
"If you can't be good, be very careful!"
Hugs,
Danielle
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on March 29, 2018, 10:21:55 AM
@ Allison: Exciting and frightening all at the same time is how I feel about my male suitors... now I have 3.
A word of caution ... my Dad told me this when I was a teenager:
"If you can't be good, be very careful!"
Hugs,
Danielle
Yeah, good advice. I'm not going out with them anytime soon if ever. What they expect in my photos isn't really me.
I'm not surprised at you having a pick of any guys you want. They'd be very lucky to be with you and they know it!!
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Quote from: Allison S on March 29, 2018, 11:04:01 AM
Yeah, good advice. I'm not going out with them anytime soon if ever. What they expect in my photos isn't really me.
I'm not surprised at you having a pick of any guys you want. They'd be very lucky to be with you and they know it!!
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@ Allison: Thank you for you way too kind words.....
... and by the way, your time will come as you continue your HRT and eventually transition to full-time.... I know that you are probably very tired of hearing me say this.... Patience is Required!!!!
At your stage of HRT I think that you are doing just fine compared to where others are at the same point in their HRT timeline.
Hang in there... good things are coming for you!! .... and I expect pictures when they do!!!
Hugs,
Danielle
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on March 29, 2018, 11:40:50 AM
@ Allison: Thank you for you way too kind words.....
... and by the way, your time will come as you continue your HRT and eventually transition to full-time.... I know that you are probably very tired of hearing me say this.... Patience is Required!!!!
At your stage of HRT I think that you are doing just fine compared to where others are at the same point in their HRT timeline.
Hang in there... good things are coming for you!! .... and I expect pictures when they do!!!
Hugs,
Danielle
Thanks sis!! It's true we're women regardless of trans status and it takes real men (or other women) to love us for who we are.
I know it's hard for you being stealth and not knowing how people will react. But I think they will see you for who you are and always have been. We shouldn't have to worry about the reactions of others but right now what we can do is teach others acceptance and compassion. Or not, everyone is free to do what they want obviously.
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Despite the hardships & difficult times we face in life, life is pretty dang awesome.
Quote from: Sarah_P on March 29, 2018, 05:19:40 PM
Despite the hardships & difficult times we face in life, life is pretty dang awesome.
Sarah_P: Generally for most of us, we don't have to look very far to see that we are indeed blessed. Life could be a lot worse, just watch the television nightly news.
Danielle
Estrogen is so weird lol... I want someone to hold me and tell me everything will be okay. But at the same time for them to push me down a flight of stairs (not really). Serious inner conflict !
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Quote from: Allison S on March 30, 2018, 05:32:36 PM
Estrogen is so weird lol... I want someone to hold me and tell me everything will be okay. But at the same time for them to push me down a flight of stairs (not really). Serious inner conflict !
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I don't even want to go there because Bonnie, my youngest dog thinks it's funny to try to trip me whilst climbing up or walking down stairs :(
Then I get a sudden rush and doing funny things (at least in my mind).
I am no longer able to run or use a stairway but I'm okay and...
In other news...
It's the rest of the world what is messed up in their own judgemental conditioned heads but I really couldn't care less about all that
Quote from: V M on March 30, 2018, 11:01:55 PM
I am no longer able to run or use a stairway but I'm okay and...
In other news...
It's the rest of the world what is messed up in their own judgemental conditioned heads but I really couldn't care less about all that
I think I can't run but won't know for sure until a "Fight or Flight" situation arises. As far as stairway goes, seeing how the bedrooms are upstairs, I only have issues with the stairway half the time and that's when I'm going up, not down.
I made an embarrassing post on another forum, and I am afraid to look at the possible reply's. Honestly though, I think I say/type a lot of cringey stuff without even noticing, so there is that. I really need to learn on how to stop dwelling on the what ifs, but it is hard not to
Conflicted with things and trying to not put too much thought in this passing phase that I'm in.. not easy!!
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I am thinking about how I should not stay up this late as I tend to hallucinate when I do, although it has not happened in a few days so that is good. Actually, I think they are more like illusions then anything else. If you are wondering then no I don't do drugs.
Quote from: TicTac on March 31, 2018, 12:48:27 PM
I made an embarrassing post on another forum, and I am afraid to look at the possible reply's. Honestly though, I think I say/type a lot of cringey stuff without even noticing, so there is that. I really need to learn on how to stop dwelling on the what ifs, but it is hard not to
Heya
TicTac: No worries... you are not alone with this issue.
I put my foot in my mouth often here on Susan's Place.... sometimes I catch it before anyone else reads it but many times not............ ughhhhhh
Hugs,
Danielle
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 01, 2018, 07:48:12 AM
Heya TicTac: No worries... you are not alone with this issue.
I put my foot in my mouth often here on Susan's Place.... sometimes I catch it before anyone else reads it but many times not............ ughhhhhh
Hugs,
Danielle
Welcome to the Club :)
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 01, 2018, 07:48:12 AM
Heya TicTac: No worries... you are not alone with this issue.
I put my foot in my mouth often here on Susan's Place.... sometimes I catch it before anyone else reads it but many times not............ ughhhhhh
Hugs,
Danielle
I do the same. I have edited some of my post 4 times before. lol
Hugs,
Chelsea
Quote from: Chelsea1807 on April 01, 2018, 11:36:35 AM
I do the same. I have edited some of my post 4 times before. lol
Hugs,
Chelsea
Okay Chels, your avatar looks different and better, what did you do? Also, I've hit the delete button more often than actually posting :)
Quote from: Cassi on April 01, 2018, 11:38:56 AM
Okay Chels, your avatar looks different and better, what did you do? Also, I've hit the delete button more often than actually posting :)
Me too.. I just think what I wrote is not even what I'm trying to say [emoji23]
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Quote from: Cassi on April 01, 2018, 11:38:56 AM
Okay Chels, your avatar looks different and better, what did you do? Also, I've hit the delete button more often than actually posting :)
Homemade facelift with tape on my forehead and neck under the wig. Went more dramatic on the makeup.
Can't wait to have a real Facelift with FFS. I'm trying to turn back the clock as much as I can. lol
I turn 40 in 2 days. :(
Hugs,
Chelsea
Quote from: Chelsea1807 on April 01, 2018, 11:50:00 AM
Homemade facelift with tape on my forehead and neck under the wig. Went more dramatic on the makeup.
Can't wait to have a real Facelift with FFS. I'm trying to turn back the clock as much as I can. lol
I turn 40 in 2 days. :(
Hugs,
Chelsea
Wow, 40! Like that was almost 25 years ago for me! You go from 30 Something to how the Hell did I get here. Your avatar looks lovely and I am jealous of your eyes :)
Quote from: Cassi on April 01, 2018, 11:52:54 AM
Wow, 40! Like that was almost 25 years ago for me! You go from 30 Something to how the Hell did I get here. Your avatar looks lovely and I am jealous of your eyes :)
Thank you Cassi, I have a lazy eye that drives me nuts. You can see it in almost all my pics.
Chels
Quote from: Chelsea1807 on April 01, 2018, 11:57:05 AM
Thank you Cassi, I have a lazy eye that drives me nuts. You can see it in almost all my pics.
Chels
I can't tell. My younger sister had that when she was younger but in all honesty I don't know if she still has it or not.
A lot of things drive me NUTZ :)
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 01, 2018, 07:48:12 AM
Heya TicTac: No worries... you are not alone with this issue.
I put my foot in my mouth often here on Susan's Place.... sometimes I catch it before anyone else reads it but many times not............ ughhhhhh
Hugs,
Danielle
Huh, well I am glad I am not alone...like you said. Admittedly I do not know what else to say, as I am terrible with reply's, but I am probably not alone on that one either! :icon_nervious:
Thanks for the reply's everyone! I feel awkward right now for some reason though but whatever.
Quote from: TicTac on April 01, 2018, 12:47:19 PM
Huh, well I am glad I am not alone...like you said. Admittedly I do not know what else to say, as I am terrible with reply's, but I am probably not alone on that one either! :icon_nervious:
Thanks for the reply's everyone! I feel awkward right now for some reason though but whatever.
I was curious as to your comment and looked and didn't see anything that would be cause for concern myself. Awkward is easy for everyone and also easy to get over - just one post at a time, lol. I use my daughter's computer and the space bar sticks sometimes and somehow the cursor will move to another area of the message and I get things messed up, Oh, the Drama!!!!!
Quote from: Cassi on April 01, 2018, 01:25:20 PM
I was curious as to your comment and looked and didn't see anything that would be cause for concern myself. Awkward is easy for everyone and also easy to get over - just one post at a time, lol. I use my daughter's computer and the space bar sticks sometimes and somehow the cursor will move to another area of the message and I get things messed up, Oh, the Drama!!!!!
One post at a times as you say lol. The space bar getting stuck is annoying, as I have had that happen to me on my other computer.
I find it quite peculiar that people seem to have a fascination with my hair color. Its like dude have you never seen black hair before or what? Quite a few people have also asked me if I dyed my hair, as if they can't believe someone would actually have black hair. Well, I am not mad about it or anything as I was just thinking about how odd it was. People can be strange sometimes.
My neighbors who are total butt munch's make me appreciate my nice neighbors that much more
Have a habit of waking up a few hours, about 4 or 5, after drifting off... it's not the worst thing but I wake up hungry lol
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Wow!!! My bro in law is watchig a soccer game Spain vs Italy and the players are SO hot
Cristiano Ronaldo.....I wonder how many girls wanna have his babies lol
Then there's blonde guy too, but Cristiano is my favorite... [emoji7][emoji76][emoji85]
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On a one to ten trolling scale I score that a zero. :laugh:
Never casually open a freezer that you hurriedly stuffed things into the last time you opened it :o
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on April 03, 2018, 06:13:51 PM
On a one to ten trolling scale I score that a zero. [emoji23]
Are you responding to my post? Lol
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Quote from: Allison S on April 03, 2018, 08:47:21 PM
Are you responding to my post? Lol
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No, I was using the thread to say what I was thinking. :)
Have you ever wondered what happened to old users who used to post on Susan's Place? I am a bit of a stalker to be honest, as I will sometimes read peoples post history when I am bored, and I have noticed that some members who were active for years would literally just stop and never post again. I cannot be the only one who wonders about this right? So yeah that is what I am thinking about right now.
My mind wanders off into odd ponderings at times
Sometimes I feel concerned by my lack of interest, particularly when I feel that some folks are just way too wound about irrelevant issues of non-interest
I understand we live in a world chalked full of hypercritical judgement and nearly all of us have to deal with a plethora of bull->-bleeped-<- on a daily basis
Often I feel torn between being glad I woke up to another day and that no-one is shooting at me and/or whither or not I really wanted to wake up to another day of this inane existence
But here I am
I've got a lot coming up to be positive about:
- I should be getting some breast forms early next week, for free
- My arms and legs are hair free, which is honestly, great
- (my currently wig is a mess, I need a new one). I have a wig consultation this Saturday & then in another two weeks :)
- Pride is less than 2 months away
- I'm getting closer to finding a solution to my facial hair problem (I don't want it, I hate it, but I can't shave using a razor, due to getting razor bumps)
Thinking about how helpful and inspiring you all are. What a gift.
Thinking about when to plan a week end trip to NYC to be totally "me". Exciting and scary, worried it will love it so much....
And thinking about how to change my profile name to just Karen....
Wish I could put some spark into my mundane life, I'm so pathetically bored beyond death most of the time even with the things that usually will bring a bit of charm
Don't particularly want to suicide, it's just getting more and more difficult to find much point to this existence anymore
I'm sure it'll be okay and something will work out, I just don't know what as of yet
Quote from: V M on April 07, 2018, 06:04:53 AM
Wish I could put some spark into my mundane life, I'm so pathetically bored beyond death most of the time even with the things that usually will bring a bit of charm
Don't particularly want to suicide, it's just getting more and more difficult to find much point to this existence anymore
I'm sure it'll be okay and something will work out, I just don't know what as of yet
I am pretty sure most people are bored beyond belief, as Humans do in fact live mundane and repetitive lives. Heck, even the billionaires are bored....probably at least. Life will become more entertaining in the future as new technologies emerge to improve or replace existing tech. Until then however...sleep the days away I guess? I don't know lol. Yeah life is pointless but there is nothing wrong with a bit of pointless fun imo.
That is all I got for advice honestly.
I just bought a 72$ dollar dress and I am starting to wonder...am I irresponsible? Personally, I do not find that to be a lot of money, but I am not rich either...yet. Hmmm...this was a bad decision on my part...probably, but then again my brain is still developing, so poor choices are to be made. Oh well....whatever.
I love to give, and today I gave 6 hours to my golf club. I have no spare time in my life and if I do I give more to others. If you have times where you don't love who you are then give love to those who need it.
I must admit my giving today has its pain, my body is sooooo sore.
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Quote from: V M on April 07, 2018, 06:04:53 AM
Wish I could put some spark into my mundane life, I'm so pathetically bored beyond death most of the time even with the things that usually will bring a bit of charm
Don't particularly want to suicide, it's just getting more and more difficult to find much point to this existence anymore
I'm sure it'll be okay and something will work out, I just don't know what as of yet
@ V M :I am so sad to hear of your current state of mind...........
Hobbies?
Regular gym visits with friends?
Volunteering with charitable agencies?
Book club and/or Cooking club with like minded friends?
Mentoring and teaching others... similar to big brother/big sister?
Regular walking or jogging with a friend or friends?
Going back to a community college to take a short term course in an area that interests you?
If you are retired you certainly have more time than myself to get involved in some of the things that I mentioned.
I am self-employed and have my own business... working long hours but I
find time/make time to get involved in most of the above activities.... not only is it good for your mental attitude but also a great way to develop new friends and relationships.
PLEASE.... Pick yourself up and get back on track to a satisfying and contributing lifestyle... you will not only feel better but you will feel better about yourself.
An old but true saying.... "Busy people are Happy people"
Just my 2 cents worth!!!!
Hugs,
Danielle
What have I done, what have I done..? What have I done..???
Trying to stop the panic,
Rowan
Ps. No, I've not done something rash in the physical world *just*, (haha), fretting if I've upset some folk.
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 08, 2018, 09:22:25 AM
@ V M :
I am so sad to hear of your current state of mind...........
Hobbies?
Regular gym visits with friends?
Volunteering with charitable agencies?
Book club and/or Cooking club with like minded friends?
Mentoring and teaching others... similar to big brother/big sister?
Regular walking or jogging with a friend or friends?
Going back to a community college to take a short term course in an area that interests you?
If you are retired you certainly have more time than myself to get involved in some of the things that I mentioned.
I am self-employed and have my own business... working long hours but I find time/make time to get involved in most of the above activities.... not only is it good for your mental attitude but also a great way to develop new friends and relationships.
PLEASE.... Pick yourself up and get back on track to a satisfying and contributing lifestyle... you will not only feel better but you will feel better about yourself.
An old but true saying.... "Busy people are Happy people"
Just my 2 cents worth!!!!
Hugs,
Danielle
I am somewhat retired but thinking about going back to work, plus I randomly got invaded by my friend girl and her friends
It's been an interesting weekend, but I'm not complaining none - Just wondering where I'm going to lay down
I'll probably try to squeeze into my bed somewhere
Think I'm gonna take a break from the forum for a while. I'm gonna take a break with everything trans related
I'm a bit conflicted.. I feel silly sharing but it's on my mind so surely it's worth sharing. Anywho, I have this weird fear if I lose weight and do dance cardio/walk a lot I'll lose the bit of curves I think I have... I feel emotional talking about finally having hips, butt and even very small breats. I was NOT expecting this reaction I'm having..
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Quote from: V M on April 09, 2018, 03:24:41 AM
I am somewhat retired but thinking about going back to work, plus I randomly got invaded by my friend girl and her friends
It's been an interesting weekend, but I'm not complaining none - Just wondering where I'm going to lay down
I'll probably try to squeeze into my bed somewhere
@ V M: Thanks for your update and reply... I am relieved to hear that you got out of your depressed feelings yesterday... !!!! Now, your complaint is that your house is full of females and you can't find a place to go to bed??
There has got to be some happy middle ground, right???
All better now....... enjoy.
Danielle
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 09, 2018, 09:49:41 AM
@ V M: Thanks for your update and reply... I am relieved to hear that you got out of your depressed feelings yesterday... !!!! Now, your complaint is that your house is full of females and you can't find a place to go to bed??
There has got to be some happy middle ground, right???
All better now....... enjoy.
Danielle
Yeah, I do deal with depression issues quite often so it was good to have a bit fun to break up the monotony
They're all in their 30's and 40's and have quite a bit more energy than me - I guess this tends to be one of their weekend things to do and my place just happened to get selected this time
I did manage to snuggle in and was immediately cuddled, woke up alone with quite the hangover though
Amazingly they were all able to get up and go to work
I'm thinking that with all the comments I'm sometimes receiving on Facebook and in person, I should perhaps start some sort of transgender Q&A. But then I remember that there are tons of transgender people online and that my opinion really isn't that more special.
Quote from: Galyo on April 09, 2018, 05:56:52 PM
I'm thinking that with all the comments I'm sometimes receiving on Facebook and in person, I should perhaps start some sort of transgender Q&A. But then I remember that there are tons of transgender people online and that my opinion really isn't that more special.
I don't know. I think I came upon a transgender cult of some kind in my viewing of such things on FB. You could become a cult leader!!!!!
Quote from: Cassi on April 09, 2018, 06:08:06 PM
I don't know. I think I came upon a transgender cult of some kind in my viewing of such things on FB. You could become a cult leader!!!!!
Does that mean I can make money? :P
Haha.
Quote from: Galyo on April 09, 2018, 06:11:03 PM
Does that mean I can make money? :P
Haha.
Only if you recruit rich people into your cult.
I'm wondering which one of the girls from last night clawed my back up a bit and why and if or when any of them might be back over to visit again :-\
Quote from: V M on April 09, 2018, 07:41:42 PM
I'm wondering which one of the girls from last night clawed my back up a bit and why and if or when any of them might be back over to visit again :-\
Well, until you discover which, when and who was the one, you'll have to use your imagination and creativity to remember.
Yeah, I suppose - I did notice upon taking inventory when I got up around 1:30 this afternoon that they had taken showers and at least one had taken a bath and left the bathwater in the tub and towels were in a pile on the floor and they had raided my makeup and perfume and left a $20 on the counter
I'm stiff, sore and tired but feel pretty happy about it ;D
Quote from: V M on April 09, 2018, 07:41:42 PM
I'm wondering which one of the girls from last night clawed my back up a bit and why and if or when any of them might be back over to visit again :-\
@ V M:I take it that most of the girls were a little younger than yourself.... hmm, it sounded like that you enjoyed the cuddling... do you think that the one that you cuddled with also clawed your back?? She might be the one that you surely invite back. Please keep updating... this sounds like a very interesting saga.
Hugs,
Danielle
Quote from: V M on April 09, 2018, 09:25:19 PM
Yeah, I suppose - I did notice upon taking inventory when I got up around 1:30 this afternoon that they had taken showers and at least one had taken a bath and left the bathwater in the tub and towels were in a pile on the floor and they had raided my makeup and perfume and left a $20 on the counter
I'm stiff, sore and tired but feel pretty happy about it ;D
@ V M: Hmmm, house-guests that leave a big mess, unless they were "very nice to me" I think I would be apt to take them off of my invitation list in the future.... or perhaps you can "return" the favor when you do an over-nighter at their house.
Also, $20 doesn't go to very far when buying makeup and perfume... plus now you have to clean the bathroom, wash the towels and bedding, wash the dishes, clean the bedrooms and the kitchen and an overall house cleaning. Plus you need bandages for your clawed back... but if you had fun, was it all worth it?
OH, AND WHERE ARE THE PICTURES, or at lease ONE picture???
Hugs,
Danielle
I've been trying to figure out how to load my own pictures, it use to be pretty simple but allot has changed
I can load pic.s I find on the internet but loading any of my own pic.s has become a mystery to me
What picture host do you use?
Quote from: V M on April 09, 2018, 10:48:28 PM
I've been trying to figure out how to load my own pictures, it use to be pretty simple but allot has changed
I can load pic.s I find on the internet but loading any of my own pic.s has become a mystery to me
What picture host do you use?
V M: I use Imgur.com with great results .... I will send you the exact instructions that I have on file that I have sent to others. I will be sending you a PM in a few minutes.
Danielle
He was so handsome, tall, and dark. The way he looked at me was like a predator looking at it's prey... or maybe I confused him. Oh well I'll never see him again anyway
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Quote from: Allison S on April 09, 2018, 10:56:28 PM
He was so handsome, tall, and dark. The way he looked at me was like a predator looking at it's prey... or maybe I confused him. Oh well I'll never see him again anyway
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Allison: I fully understand the feeling, with the wrong guy it can feel creepy and scary for sure...
.... hence the title of my new thread...
.... I am the HUNTED PREY : Danielle's Chronicles
Danielle
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 09, 2018, 10:52:56 PM
V M: I use Imgur.com with great results .... I will send you the exact instructions that I have on file that I have sent to others. I will be sending you a PM in a few minutes.
Danielle
OK, I'll try to figure it out - Most of my pic.s are on my iphone so maybe I would have to download them to my PC and then upload them to the Imgur thingy?
I think only the food pic.s and maybe a couple of the others would be acceptable to post here as nudity and underwear shots would violate the ToS
Quote from: V M on April 09, 2018, 11:21:50 PM
OK, I'll try to figure it out - Most of my pic.s are on my iphone so maybe I would have to download them to my PC and then upload them to the Imgur thingy?
I think only the food pic.s and maybe a couple of the others would be acceptable to post here as nudity and underwear shots would violate the ToS
V M: What??? You took underwear and nudity pictures during the all-girls romp at your house????
My oh my, what are you teaching those younger women? ...
.....however, more than likely they were teaching you... am I right?
Danielle
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 10, 2018, 12:07:29 AM
V M: What??? You took underwear and nudity pictures during the all-girls romp at your house????
My oh my, what are you teaching those younger women? ...
.....however, more than likely they were teaching you... am I right?
Danielle
You are correct Ma'am but I wasn't the only one taking pictures and I did learn a few things such as how many girls will fit on a loveseat, a recliner and a queen size mattress and that all of them like pasta, "The Walking Dead" and insatiate chatter
Also, girls snore to, but I already knew that
Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 09, 2018, 10:52:56 PM
V M: I use Imgur.com with great results .... I will send you the exact instructions that I have on file that I have sent to others. I will be sending you a PM in a few minutes.
Danielle
Please
@Alaskan Danielle ....me too!🌸🌸🌸
But back on topic.... I'm thinking....
This homemade Lemoncello is goooood!
Limoncello? Diluted vodka with lemon? It is a rather refreshing drink but I don't drink much hard alcohol any more
Did you put an umbrella and lemon slice with it?
I'm thinking various thoughts but not always sure how to express them
Oh my, look at the time...
It's time to share your thoughts on the all new What are you thinking 11.0 (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,236435.new.html#new)